by Kasie West
He couldn’t control his laughter, and it took him a while before he could say, “I missed you so much. And you are not making this easy.”
“No, I’m serious. Come here.” I pulled him toward me by the pockets of his shorts and puckered my lips as tight as possible, then nodded for him to do the same.
“You are the biggest goofball,” he said.
When I didn’t stop he sighed and said, “Fine. I guess our first kiss is going to be awful.”
I had to purse my lips even harder to control my smile. I put my hands on his shoulders and stretched up on my tiptoes. He rolled his eyes and pressed his tightly puckered lips to mine. It was just as bad as I knew it would be. I smiled and pulled away.
“See, it can only get—”
He slid his hand to the back of my neck and pulled me to him. His lips were soft this time as they found mine. He kissed me once, then twice, then ran his lips along mine. “Better,” he whispered, finishing my sentence.
I started to nod but we were kissing again, and I didn’t have to think about where to put my hands this time, they just dug into his hair. His hands went to my hips, his thumbs applying the perfect amount of pressure there to hold me up. He deepened the kiss, his tongue finding mine. He tasted even better than he smelled, like mint and sugar. He backed me up to the closest wall and leaned into me. I couldn’t get enough air, but I didn’t want to stop. Cooper was pressed against me, breathing my breath and setting my skin on fire. He was warm and familiar and amazing. When it felt like I would burst, I finally pushed him away and gulped down several mouthfuls of air.
“We don’t suck at that,” he said.
I shook my head, still catching my breath.
“I love you so much.”
I smiled and tipped my head back, looking at the starred ceiling. “I’m so happy.”
“Me too.”
I closed my eyes and he brushed a soft kiss to my lips again.
“Now,” he said, “you have to tell me everything that’s happened in the last several weeks. Starting with what you were doing in that abandoned church building.”
THIRTY-EIGHT
“Do you think they’ll want cheesecake before or after they kill us?” I asked as we sat in the Cheesecake Factory waiting for Justin and Rachel to arrive. They had both gotten into town in the past two days. Justin first, the night before last, and Rachel last night. Cooper and I had decided we’d tell them about our relationship in person, not over text or phone. So here we waited. I’d already told Lacey the night it had happened. She had been happy for me, but this was different. Lacey knew about my feelings. Justin and Rachel didn’t.
“The real question is, should we get cheesecake now or have faith that they won’t kill us?”
“Probably now.”
“That’s what I was thinking.”
I smiled.
He squeezed my knee under the table. “Do you know one of my favorite memories of you from this summer?”
“No, what?” I asked.
“Quad riding.”
“Of course you’d like the thing that terrified me.”
“No, I like the thing that made you cling to me with everything you had. We should do that again.”
“I can do that without the quad if you’d like.”
Cooper smirked.
My phone buzzed and I pulled it out, thinking it was a text from Justin or Rachel about their arrival time, but it was an email notification. My cheeks went numb. “The winter program,” I said aloud.
“What?” Cooper asked.
“It’s from Wishstar.”
“Did you apply?”
“I forgot to tell you. I did.”
“Wow. Congratulations.”
“Don’t congratulate me yet. I don’t know if I got in.”
“I was congratulating you for applying. It’s about time.”
I nudged his shoulder with mine. “Funny.”
“Well? Are you going to open it?”
I nodded but took my time. This was the last moment to savor not knowing. After this I’d either be happy or devastated. And I’d handle either. I clicked on the email.
“Congratulations,” I read out loud. “You have been accepted to our winter course at the Wishstar Institute of Visual and Performing Art.”
“That’s amazing,” Cooper said, kissing me. “I knew you could do it.”
“Thanks.”
“Am I late?” Rachel’s voice had me flying out of my seat. Had she seen our kiss? She didn’t act like it as she continued talking. “How come you two are both already here? And how come you haven’t ordered cheesecake?” She picked up a piece of bread from the basket on the table, which we hadn’t touched, and ripped off a bite. “I’m starving. I’ve been sleeping for eighteen hours straight. I’m never going to sleep tonight. Jet lag.” She flung her arms around me in a hug. “Hi!”
“Hi!” I said with a laugh. “Welcome home.”
Cooper stood and hugged her as well.
“It felt like I was gone for years, but I’m back and everything is exactly the same. It’s this weird time-warp thing. Where is Justin?”
Cooper looked over Rachel’s shoulder. “Right there.”
Justin headed toward our table with a big smile on. “My friends,” he said. We all took turns hugging him. “Next summer, we do a trip together. This was way too much time away.”
“That’s what I was telling Abby last month,” Rachel said. “Was that last month? That we need to take on Europe together after we graduate.”
“How come there’s no cheesecake on this table?” Justin asked, looking around for a waiter.
“We weren’t sure if you’d want cheesecake before or after you killed us,” Cooper said, then laughed when I gave him wide eyes. That wasn’t exactly how we’d practiced doing this. When we practiced, we’d eased into it, talked about how we’d been friends forever and how that had developed over the summer to something more. This wasn’t that.
“Why would we kill you?” Rachel asked, sitting down in the seat next to mine. Justin sat as well, noticed the bread, and picked up a piece.
“Did you guys eat at all this summer?” I asked.
“I ate too much,” Rachel said. “In every city, any new thing I saw. It was amazing. But now my body expects to be fed every two hours.”
“I haven’t had American food in a long time. Well, I guess last night, but . . . you know what I mean,” Justin said through his mouthful.
“Abby has great news,” Cooper said. “She got into the art program she’s been drooling over.”
“What! That’s amazing!” Justin said.
“So amazing. Congrats! Is that why we’re going to kill you? Why would we kill you over that?” Rachel asked.
“We’ve all been friends for a long time,” I started, back on track with how we’d planned.
The waiter appeared at our table. “I see your whole party is here now. What can I get you?”
“I love Abby,” Cooper said matter-of-factly. “It wasn’t until this summer that I realized what an idiot I’ve been for not making her mine.” Then he looked at the waiter. “I’ll take an Oreo cheesecake and some fries.”
“Wait. What?” Rachel asked a piece of bread halfway to her mouth.
“Should I come back?” the waiter asked.
“No!” Justin said. “I want lemon cheesecake. This news doesn’t change that fact. Also,” he said to Cooper, “it’s about time.”
“What?” Rachel asked again, this time looking at Justin. “You knew this? Am I the only one who didn’t know this?”
“You didn’t tell Rachel about last summer?” Cooper asked. “I thought she would be the only one not surprised.”
“I didn’t tell anyone.”
“Exactly,” Rachel said. “In this friend group we all get the same things or no things. You were right. I am going to kill you.”
I should’ve told her about my feelings for Cooper a long time ago. I could tell she was hurt. “I
’m sorry,” I said softly, just to her.
“I’m going to come back,” the waiter said.
“Wait,” Cooper said. “Rachel. Order. Then we’ll talk about your strange rules.”
“Fine,” she huffed. “I want chocolate. Your most chocolate cheesecake.”
The waiter wrote down her order, then turned to me. Right, I still hadn’t ordered. “White chocolate raspberry,” I said.
“At least some things haven’t changed,” Rachel said with an eye roll.
The waiter left quickly and silence took over.
“How did this happen?” Rachel finally asked.
“What do you mean, how did this happen?” Justin threw a crust of bread at her. “They like each other. We left them alone for the summer, and they finally realized it.”
She turned to us. “And you both thought this was a good idea? To put a ticking time bomb on our friend group? Soon we will implode and end up scattered into pieces, and then how will you feel?”
“Ouch, Rach,” Cooper said. “I’m glad you have faith in us.”
“Can we just call dibs now on who gets custody of who in the breakup?” Rachel said, a smirk finally coming onto her face. Oh, good. She would forgive me, eventually, at least.
“I call Abby,” both she and Justin said at the same time.
I laughed.
“What?” Cooper said. “Why Abby?”
“She’s funnier,” Justin said. “And more chill.”
“I guess that’s reason number five thousand why I’m not letting her go.”
“Oh, wow,” Rachel said. “They say cheesy things about each other now. This is going to take some getting used to.”
“For me too,” I said.
“What do you mean, for you too?” Cooper asked, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me against his side. “Maybe I should say more cheesy things so you’ll get used to it faster. All of you.”
I pushed him away with a laugh.
“Justin, don’t get any ideas,” Rachel said. “We will always be just friends.”
“Absolutely no ideas happening over here,” he assured her.
The waiter came back with our cheesecake and a basket of fries for Cooper. Rachel reached across and snatched one of his fries. He smacked her hand.
“You still don’t share?”
“The world didn’t change while you were gone.”
“Are you sure about that?”
Cooper smiled at me. My world had changed. I smiled back, then picked up my fork and took a bite of cheesecake.
“So does this mean no four-amigo trip next summer? Because it was going to be epic.”
“Why would this mean that?” I asked. “We will definitely do that trip next summer. We will crush that trip.”
Rachel pushed my shoulder. “I’m pissed at you for not telling me, but I’ll be happy soon. Really.”
“Enough about us,” Cooper said. “We need to celebrate Abby’s awesome news and then hear everything about your summers.”
We stayed at our table long after our food was gone and probably long after the waiter wished we would leave. Rachel and Justin shared their adventures, and even though things were different, everything felt right.
As we left the restaurant, Cooper tugged on my hand, allowing Justin and Rachel to walk ahead.
“Are we good?” he asked. “Did that work out how you hoped?”
“Yes. It went great.”
“You just seem quiet.”
“I do?” He held open the door for me, and we stepped outside. Rachel had climbed up on the fountain out front and was walking around the rim with her arms out.
“You’re not having doubts, are you?” His face had taken on a worried expression.
“What? No.” I reached my arms up around his neck. “I love you,” I said quietly, then threw my head back and screamed, “I love Cooper Wells!”
“Get in line!” Justin called out.
I laughed and Cooper’s shiny smile was back.
“Good,” he said. “Because unrequited love is the worst. If I had a choice between unrequited love and never being able to love at all, I’d definitely choose no love.”
I smacked his chest. “So you did know what Lacey was talking about at that party. And here she thought you were clueless.”
“Lacey. Is she going to be coming around more?”
“I think so. We’re friends now.”
“Better friends than us?”
“You’re my best friend, Cooper. Irreplaceable.”
“I love you.” He kissed me, stealing my breath away.
Okay, maybe this wouldn’t be too hard to get used to. “Thank you, heart list,” I said under my breath.
“You’re giving credit to that list for us?”
“I’m giving credit wherever I can. I won Cooper Wells’s heart and I’m caging it up and never letting it out.”
He chuckled. “Be gentle with me.”
I went serious. “I will.”
“And, Abby,” he said. “It may have taken me a while to figure it out, but I’m the one who won.”
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
To all of you out there who have a dream that you feel is just out of your reach, keep reaching!
Thank you to my readers!! I love you all so much! I appreciate your support and encouragement, your kind words, your tweets, your Goodreads questions, your Instagram comments. I see them and they mean the world to me. Thanks for reading my books! Thanks for reading in general! I love readers. I’m a reader first, and I really feel like I’ve found my people.
To my agent, Michelle Wolfson, thanks for being my support always and my therapist sometimes (maybe more than sometimes). You are the best. I’m so happy I get to work with you. You make my job easier and a lot more fun!
To my editor, Catherine Wallace, who believes in me and helps make my stories better: thank you! And thanks to Jon Howard, Michelle Taormina, Alison Klapthor, Stephanie Hoover, Bess Brasswell, Sabrina Abballe, Meghan Pettit, Jen Klonsky, and the entire HarperTeen team. You took a chance on me in the very beginning, and I will be forever grateful for that.
As always, thanks to my husband, Jared West. Seriously, this guy is the best. He supports me in all I do, even when I have to go into hermit mode. I have some pretty fabulous kids that get me too: Hannah, Autumn, Abby, and Donavan. These are my favorite people ever. I love just hanging out with them. We laugh more than we should in this house, and I’m grateful for that. I love to laugh. Laughing is my favorite (every time I say that I think of the movie Elf).
I have some amazing writer friends who are not only fun to be with but are awesomely talented too. So much love to: Candice Kennington, Jenn Johansson, Renee Collins, Natalie Whipple, Bree Despain, Michelle Argyle, Sara Raasch, Shannon Messenger, and Jessi Kirby.
And to my nonwriter friends who I love and who make me happy: Stephanie Ryan, Rachel Whiting, Elizabeth Minnick, Claudia Wadsworth, Amy Burbidge, Misti Hamel, Brittney Swift, Mandy Hillman, Emily Freeman, Megan Grant, and Jamie Lawrence.
Last but not least, my amazing extended family, who have all been so supportive of me: thank you, Chris DeWoody, Heather Garza, Jared DeWoody, Spencer DeWoody, Stephanie Ryan, Dave Garza, Rachel DeWoody, Zita Konik, Kevin Ryan, Vance West, Karen West, Eric West, Michelle West, Sharlynn West, Rachel Braithwaite, Brian Braithwaite, Angie Stettler, Jim Stettler, Emily Hill, Rick Hill, and the twenty-five children (plus some of the children’s children) who exist among all these people.
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Photo credit Stephanie Ryan Photography
KASIE WEST lives with her family in central California, where the heat tries
to kill her with its 115-degree stretches. She graduated from Fresno State University with a BA degree that has nothing to do with writing. Visit her online at www.kasiewest.com.
Discover great authors, exclusive offers, and more at hc.com.
BOOKS BY KASIE WEST
Pivot Point
Split Second
The Distance Between Us
On the Fence
The Fill-In Boyfriend
By Your Side
Love, Life, and the List
P.S. I Like You
Lucky in Love
CREDITS
Cover photography by Michael Frost
Cover design and hand lettering by Michelle Taormina
COPYRIGHT
HarperTeen is an imprint of HarperCollins Publishers.
LOVE, LIFE, AND THE LIST. Copyright © 2018 by Kasie West. All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the nonexclusive, nontransferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse-engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins e-books.
www.epicreads.com
Library of Congress Control Number: 2017949421
ISBN 978-0-06-267577-4 (trade bdg.)
ISBN 978-0-06-283569-7 (int.)
EPub Edition © December 2017 ISBN 9780062675781
17 18 19 20 21 PC/LSCH 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
FIRST EDITION
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