by Stella Clark
Humming, Sarah glanced around the house. It was small, but it was theirs. And in the past two months, they had made it into a good home. There were curtains in the windows, flowers at the table, and she was finishing a second rug.
“That’s what I can do,” she brightened at the idea. She wanted it finished before the baby came, and that was any day now. Sarah rested her hands on her large belly as she headed to the front room. Everything was harder lately, from walking to dressing to picking things up.
Even now, she glanced at the basket of cloth and yarn at her feet. Sarah had to look around her stomach now, not over it. She attempted to lean down for the basket. But it was still out of reach. Glancing around, she grabbed hold of the nearby table and tried to bend her knees without falling over.
“Oh!” Sarah gasped as her legs gave out and she collapsed on the floor on her back. Her breath knocked out of her lungs, she stared at the ceiling for a minute in shock before coughing.
Another cramp arrived and she winced, curling up her legs as she grabbed her stomach. This one was longer, and her face screwed up as she waited for it to pass. “Oh bother. Oh bother. Oh bother …” Then she sighed when it finally disappeared.
There had been a few in the last couple of days, but in talking to the pastor’s wife, Mrs. Timmons, she had learned that was to be expected. The woman had been stopping by every couple of days to check on her. As the closest person they had to a doctor or midwife, the woman had helped birth twenty children in town over the last couple of years. She had offered her services to help, and Sarah was glad to have found guidance and a new friend.
Sarah sighed in relief as the pain faded. Her back ached, but she knew that was normal. Especially since she’d just fallen. Frowning, she glanced around and shakily tried to get herself back up onto her feet. But on the floor, in her pregnant state, she couldn’t find the balance to sit up.
Then the door opened.
When Watt stepped through and scanned the room for her, she tried to smile when he spotted her. His eyes widened as he hurried over. “Sarah! What happened?” He dropped his jacket to reach her side, grasping her close to pull her up.
In seconds she was back on her feet and helped to the nearest chair. “Thank you,” she managed as she wiped her brow, wondering why she was sweating. Fanning herself, she shook her head. “I was trying to reach the basket and then I fell … I couldn’t get back up. I suppose I could have slept there for the night.”
Rolling his eyes, Watt chuckled. “You’re not sleeping on our floor, Sarah. Come here. It’s late enough. You can knit tomorrow.” He tried to wipe his hands clean of soot before stretching them back out to her.
As she put out her hand, she noticed a streak he had left on her arm. But she didn’t mind as he swiftly pulled her back up. It was much easier being pregnant with Watt around, Sarah decided. She opened her mouth to tell him this just as something wet trickled down her legs.
He saw her face and noticed something was wrong. “What? What is it? Are you all right?”
“I …” Sarah hesitated as she glanced down. Her heart skipped a beat as she tried to comprehend if her guess was right. Surely the child wasn’t coming yet. It was time for everyone to go to bed, after all. Didn’t children arrive in the daytime? Before she could say anything more, another cramp passed and she tightened her grip on Watt’s arm. “Oh!”
Watt stepped closer, his other arm around her for support. “Sarah? What’s wrong?”
“The baby,” she gritted her teeth. “I think it’s time.”
***
Everything after that happened in a great blur. As Watt led her to the bedroom, they had their first argument. He wanted to go bring Mrs. Timmons there and she wanted him to stay. The idea of being left alone even for a moment terrified her.
“I need you to trust me.” Watt knelt by her side as he pulled a strand of hair from her face. “I’m going to return. I’ll bring Mrs. Timmons back with me. But I think we would both feel better if she’s here. She knows what to do, remember? I swear I’ll be right back.”
Sarah shakily patted the pillow she was sitting beside. For a minute, the pain was gone, and she had a moment of doubt. Perhaps this wasn’t really happening. She could just go to bed. Leaning against the bed frame, she found herself nodding. He did make some sense. “All right. I suppose it wouldn’t hurt. Just be quick. Wait!”
Watt stayed through the next wave of contractions, his eyes wide as he watched her. When it passed, she forced herself to nod. Then he kissed her forehead and ran out.
Soon the contractions were coming quicker and staying longer. There were two more before she heard the front door again and footsteps rushing her way.
Mrs. Timmons was there, with Watt behind her, carrying various items. The older woman quickly assessed the situation before coming over to give Sarah a quick hug. “Let’s get to this, shall we?”
Immediately, the woman began to provide instructions. Watt started to run around to gather everything they needed while Sarah tried to focus on her breathing. If she didn’t think of anything else, then she didn’t feel the fear clawing at her throat.
After all, what did she know of any of this? Of marriage, of family? She’d never held a baby before and had no idea how to birth one. Sarah shuddered, closing her eyes.
“Focus.” Mrs. Timmons broke through her thoughts. “Sarah, stay with us. You need to stay alert. It’s not going to be pretty, but it’s the only way. You want to hold your baby, don’t you?”
Nodding, she opened her eyes. “Yes. Yes, I—” she groaned as another contraction arrived.
“Here.” Watt delivered the hot water to Mrs. Timmons as Sarah gasped for breath. He leaned forward, offering his hand to her.
“This is no place for a man,” Mrs. Timmons told him. “You should stay out of the room. I have this handled.”
Sarah grabbed his hand. “No!” she panicked, looking up at him. “Don’t go.”
His eyes skirted to the other woman. “Are you sure?”
She nodded quickly before another contraction could distract her. “Please?”
Watt studied her for a minute before running a thumb across her cheek. She could feel her hair plastered to her sweaty face. There wasn’t any chance that she looked like a beautiful young bride now. For a minute her heart dropped, worried he would leave.
But then he nodded. “All right. I’m here.”
Mrs. Timmons sighed but said nothing more than for him to climb up behind Sarah on the bed to provide support from behind. It was almost time to start pushing.
Chapter Eight
“I’ll get him.” Watt rolled out of bed, wide awake the moment he heard the wailing. He heard Sarah shift in the blankets as he padded to the end of the bed. They had meant to keep the cradle out of the room, but both of them found it easier to keep baby Matthew close by.
He reached the cradle and carefully picked up the newborn boy. A smile spread to his face as he gazed into those big blue eyes. It was much easier now to hold him right. Mrs. Timmons had been quick to teach them that.
Only a week had passed since the child had been born. Watt felt reborn himself, looking into the eyes of one so small. He grinned as the child quieted down and stared back at him. What was the child thinking? Did Matthew know anything yet? Did he know how much he was loved and cherished? Watt hoped so.
Feeling eyes on them, he grudgingly looked away from the baby and found Sarah watching them. She’d stolen his pillow again to sit up comfortably and had cocked her head to study him.
“What is it?” he whispered, not wanting to disturb Matthew now that he was quiet.
She shook her head as she sighed. As a harried young mother, Sarah hadn’t bothered to pin up her hair since the birth. And Watt hadn’t minded, for he rather enjoyed seeing her honey-colored hair flowing over her shoulders.
Coming around to her side of the bed, he raised his eyebrow while still carefully swinging Matthew softly side to side. “What?” There was clear
ly something on her mind.
“It’s nothing,” she chuckled softly. “Perhaps I’ll tell you later. But I can take him now. He’ll be hungry in a moment.”
He glanced at the baby. “Just another second,” Watt requested. “I can’t get enough of him.”
“You’ll be late to work,” she pointed out as she reached out for the baby. “Don’t worry. We’ll still be here when you return.”
Watt groaned, kissing the baby before obeying. She was right, after all. He had stayed home the first two days after Matthew was born, and then had reluctantly returned to the mines. The work didn’t feel so hard then, but it certainly felt long. He’d practically run home each night since in the hopes of spending more time with his family.
He kissed Sarah’s forehead as well before stepping away. When she hadn’t protested the first kiss while she was giving birth, he’d found himself doing it more often. Any chance to show her how much he cared, any chance to touch her for a second.
Watt pulled on his shirt before stepping through to the kitchen. Mrs. Timmons had brought them food enough for the month, with a few things from the neighbors as well. He grabbed an apple for himself before preparing a quick plate for Sarah.
“Thank you,” she nodded after tucking the baby close to her chest.
Watt glanced away even though she had a blanket covering herself. Sarah’s cheeks were red when he looked again.
“All right, I’ll be back,” he promised her. Unable to find any more excuses to delay, Watt forced himself out of the house and towards the mines.
***
Whistling as he went down the lane, Watt could have sworn the sun was shining a little brighter. He put on his hat and followed the other men into the darkness. It didn’t feel so gloomy lately, and now he had more energy to keep moving.
Though he knew he’d lost plenty of sleep since the baby had come, he didn’t mind. Becoming a father was invigorating more than anything else. Watt’s thoughts wandered as he pulled out his gear, fixed his headlamp, and started working on his particular strain in the wall. It was a good one and he’d managed a small windfall just the other day that would keep them comfortable for a season or two.
Around him, a few men talked. But mostly they worked. It was hard labor, whether one was hammering at the walls or carrying the rocks around to get out of the way. The tunnels echoed with their grunting and shuffling.
Watt wondered if they were thinking about their families as well. It was incredible how his mindset had changed so quickly. With Matthew’s birth, the world seemed a lighter and better place. Already, he had wanted to build a relationship with Sarah, but now he felt that more than ever. He hadn’t thought he would ever have a family of his own like this. But now he did.
Though Matthew might not be his blood, the baby was his son. He’d felt that the moment Mrs. Timmons had put the screaming, squirming boy into his arms. Watt knew he’d never forget the rush of emotions that had poured over him as he’d admired the strong child and handed him into his mother’s arms.
They were a family now. A real family. Even if it took him a while to grow close to Sarah, any effort was going to be worth it.
His heart had never felt so full. Watt pulled out his hammer and continued working at pulling the ore free, his thoughts wandering all the way back home.
Everything was going well until he heard a loud crash.
“Watch—” He heard before everything turned black.
***
Darkness wrapped him into a tight cocoon, tugging at him mercilessly. Watt felt his consciousness come in and out, searching for light and the world he knew so well, but all he could sense was a loud drumming.
When his eyes finally opened, Watt found himself staring at his bedroom ceiling. The drumming was beginning to fade and he could hear something else. Voices. He heard Matthew, Sarah, and someone else.
Groaning, Watt tried to sit but stopped when he couldn’t use his elbow to prop himself up. His brow furrowed as he looked down to find his left arm wrapped tightly to his chest.
“Sarah?” he called for her, but his voice came out in a thick croak.
But she had heard. There was a loud gasp as something fell. Then he heard her footsteps rush in his direction. Holding Matthew in both arms, she arrived in the doorway with tears in her eyes.
“You’re awake,” she announced as tears spilled down her cheeks. Blinking them away, Sarah hurried over to him. “No, don’t get up.”
Watt watched her in his confusion. “Of course I’m awake. What am I doing here? The last thing I remember …” He could feel the thick bandage wrapped around his head, but it didn’t make sense to him.
Sitting on the edge of the bed, she shifted Matthew in her arms. He gurgled as Sarah took Watt’s hand that was tied down by his chest. She managed a tearful smile for him. “There was an accident in the mines. The pastor and some of the miners brought you here. They said … they weren’t sure if you were breathing. You hit your head and your arm was so …” She swallowed hard. “But—but you’re awake now. That’s good.”
“Of course.” He squeezed her hand as he tried to ignore the sharp pain that lanced through his arm. “I’m here, Sarah.”
Upon her insistence, Watt forced himself to relax back against the pillows. Sarah carefully set Matthew beside him in the middle of the bed, where he could use his uninjured arm to cradle the child. She left the room to bring him food, and he learned he’d been unconscious for over a full day.
The accident had knocked him off his feet both literally and figuratively. Watt felt guilty for putting this on Sarah as she now had to take care of two boys just a week after giving birth. Though she told him she didn’t mind and appreciated the extra time they had together as he spent the next week in bed, Watt knew it had to be hard on her.
Chapter Nine
“Not again.” Sarah tried to take a deep breath before opening her eyes and glancing down at the bread dough. But she couldn’t help but glance at her hands. They wouldn’t stop shaking and she’d just knocked too much flour into the bowl. Again.
Leaning forward on the counter, she forced another deep breath so she wouldn’t get upset. There wasn’t time to be upset or anxious or afraid.
Yet she couldn’t help it. Closing her eyes, Sarah tried to concentrate. Even as she enjoyed hearing Watt sing softly to Matthew in the next room, she dreaded the quiet. It was in the quiet that bad things happened. It had been quiet when she’d realized Curtis was never coming for her. And it was quiet when she’d learned Watt had been badly injured.
They had worried when he hadn’t woken up. Just because they’d managed to make sure he was breathing didn’t mean he would ever open his eyes again. That’s what everyone had said.
And though the weight of the world had slipped off her shoulders when he woke up, Sarah now kept waiting for something worse to happen. That he would fall and hurt himself more. That he would fall asleep and never wake up. That he would return to the mines and never return to her. Waving a hand before her face, she wondered how she could keep going from hot to cold to hot again.
“Sarah?”
Her heart leapt. “I’m fine.” She sucked in a deep breath as she whirled around to look at Watt. She wiped her brow. It was a warm day, though there was frost outside. A trickle of sweat ran down her spine but it didn’t distract her for long.
Swallowing hard, she looked at the man before her. He was going to be just fine. That’s what they had decided. He was going to be fine. Time had helped him heal and Watt was back on his feet. The terrible cut on his forehead was finally healing and no longer bled. He could still wiggle his fingers and had adjusted nicely to his sling.
The man was still handsome, still kind, still wonderful. In the last couple of weeks, she had realized that her fondness had turned into something deeper and more powerful than anything she had ever experienced.
And that scared Sarah. The strong emotions scared her just as much as she was scared of losing them.
/> His brow furrowed as he studied her face carefully before stepping up closer to her. She hid her hands behind her back. She didn’t want him to notice, too embarrassed that she couldn’t control herself.
Sarah just needed more time in the kitchen. That’s what she told herself. Slowly but surely, she would eventually bake the loaf of bread. It was Sunday, but they were home for the Sabbath. They could all use the rest. Only there wasn’t time to rest since her family needed to eat.
She dropped her head as he took another step so they were nearly touching. Her heart pounded inside her chest, wondering what he wanted. What he needed. If there was anything she could do to help him. Maybe stepping away from the kitchen for a minute to focus on another task would help her calm down.
Before he said anything, he reached out for her hand. When she didn’t hand it over, his hand touched her elbow and trailed down her forearm. Her breath caught. Picking it up off the table, he intertwined their fingers. She inhaled deeply before shyly daring a look in his direction.
“You’re shaking,” Watt murmured in a puzzled tone.
“I’m fine,” she told him again. “I’m making bread.”
He shook his head, studying her face. Still holding her fingers, he felt her cheeks with the back of his hand. Both cheeks and then her forehead. She hoped he wouldn’t say anything, but knew Watt was too good of a man not to.
“You’re burning up,” Watt realized in dismay. “What are you doing up? You’re sick.” She opened her mouth to protest that she had felt fine that morning, but he tugged her to the bedroom. “How long have you been sick, Sarah? What’s wrong?”
A lump formed in her throat before she could say anything. Why was he like that? Sarah wanted to hate him for his kindness. The man was sweet and generous. He was everything she could want and more. But realizing she might lose him in an instant was keeping her awake and unable to concentrate on anything besides the idea of suddenly being all alone.