I watched them walk off to show my daughter a new colt.
“Get out. Go up there. Pretend you’re just visiting. Let her see you. Go on,” Cassie urged.
I put my hand on the door handle.
“Do it!”
I tried, but I was too frightened. All I could see was Daddy’s red face of rage. Finally, I did start the engine again and started away, hoping they wouldn’t look in my direction.
“You’re a coward!” Cassie screamed. “You’re an embarrassment to the Heaven-stone family. I won’t help you anymore. I’ll let you fail miserably. Everything in your life is going to go wrong. You’re a walking tragedy.”
I drove on, my body shaking so hard I thought I might run off the road. After a while, I calmed, and Cassie was no longer sitting beside me.
She was fuming in her grave.
But her words and threats still echoed in the car. I had no doubt they would echo in my mind and in my dreams until the day I buried her deeply enough to shut her up forever.
Maybe, though, she was right. Maybe by then it would be too late.
Rehearsal
AS DADDY WOULD say, the days remaining before the grand wedding and Ethan’s return went like molasses running up a hill. Ethan called me as soon as he reached home and then called every day thereafter, each time talking for nearly a half hour. He even called me periodically from the road when he had begun his journey back to Kentucky so I could be aware of his progress, always ending with something like, “Twelve more hours until touchdown.”
At breakfast, two days after Ethan had left the Heaven-stone estate, Daddy had finally revealed to me what I already knew: Ethan was coming to work for us.
“I’m quite taken with this young man you’ve found, Semantha. I think he has great potential.” He looked at Lucille, who nodded. It bothered me that he needed her stamp of approval for almost anything he said to me these days. “For now,” he continued, still looking at Lucille, “at Lucille’s suggestion, we’re going to permit him to stay in the guest suite here. I know how difficult it is financially these days for young people to start jobs away from home, and we don’t want him wasting time looking for lodging he can afford.”
Both looked at me and waited for my response.
“That’s very nice,” I said in a flat tone of voice, causing Lucille’s eyebrows to lift into two quarter-moons. I was suddenly aware that whenever she did that, everything on her face lifted. Her nostrils widened, and her upper lip rose, quivering her chin. Was that a consequence of plastic surgery?
“Nice?” Lucille looked at Daddy and smiled. “You don’t have to disguise or contain your excitement about it with us, Semantha. Your father and I agree that you’re a young woman now. It’s not like we’re letting some teenagers run loose or something. Both of you have proven to be very responsible people.”
“Everything’s happening so fast,” I said, by way of explaining my controlled reaction.
“Yes. Well,” she said, “when things are right, it’s good that they happen fast. However, I assure you that both your father and I have given it all considerable thought. It’s in no way an impulsive decision on our part. Are you upset about it? Would you rather we rescinded our offer to Ethan and waited?”
“No, no, of course not. I think it’s a wonderful thing you’re doing for him,” I replied, this time with a great deal of enthusiasm.
“Good. Well, then, that’s that.”
I said nothing more, and she was eager to get off the topic and return to discussing the wedding and honeymoon plans, barely looking at me and never asking my opinion about anything now. What had happened to her invitation to me to be an integral part of it all as a way of drawing us closer? Had it all been for show, or, as the date drew closer, was she simply far too excited to notice anything else?
Whatever the reason, I soon felt invisible and, in fact, didn’t really feel that I existed again in this house until the day Ethan drove through the gate and onto the Heaven-stone estate. Work had already begun on construction of the dance floor and the creation and arrangement of the lighting and decorations Lucille had envisioned. Along with the usual grounds workers, dozens more temporary employees were on the property. Sound systems were being tested and refined, and the large tent and smaller tents for specific purposes were being designed and set up. The cabana and some of the other buildings were repainted. More flowers were brought in until there didn’t seem to be any area visible to the guests that wasn’t brightened. Not a chip, not a crack in any walkway, was left unrepaired.
It seemed there were artisans, caterers, and service people meeting, planning, and rehearsing daily. Lucille assigned one of the Heaven-stone Corporation’s best secretaries to be her assistant. Along with her wedding planner, the two marched about the house and property with Lucille rattling off thoughts, complaints, and new ideas constantly, her hands flying around her like nervous birds. Everyone jumped when she barked a command or merely looked in his or her direction. It was as if the whole thing were a great puppet show, with Lucille pulling the strings. At least that brought a smile to my face, but nothing as big and as deep as the smile I wore when Ethan finally stepped out of his car and looked up at me waiting on the portico. He had phoned when he was ten minutes away, and I had hurried down to watch him drive in and greet him.
“Man, did I miss you,” he said, rushing up the steps. He gathered me up in his arms in a gentle bear hug and kissed me softly. “My parents thought there was something wrong with me, because every once in a while, I would simply drift off and not hear a thing either of them had said. They didn’t know that was because I was thinking of you, envisioning you, dreaming of you. There wasn’t room in my head for anything or anyone else.”
Perhaps there really was a Cassie part of me. What girl wouldn’t be thrilled to hear these words from the man she thought she loved and hoped loved her? Yet I couldn’t smother the thought that these words sounded too perfect, even rehearsed. Then again, I asked myself, what if they were? What if all during his trip back, or at least the last few hours on the road, he had worked on those words because he wanted them to sound perfect? What was wrong with that, with a man trying as hard as he could to please the woman he loved?
“Is everything all right?” he asked when I didn’t burst open like a radiant flower in the sunlight that his smiling face had brought.
“Yes, oh, yes, Ethan. I missed you, too. This place has become so busy with so many people and so much going on that I can’t hear myself think. It really is more like an invasion,” I said, and he laughed.
“Well, it is the wedding of the century, isn’t it?” he asked.
“To Lucille, it is. To me, it’s just a hectic, maddening commotion.”
He nodded. “I bet. But don’t worry. I’m back. I’ll help you get away from it all. Let me get my bags. You know, I have a lot more than last time.”
“I’ll help.” I followed him down to the car. A parade of trucks was coming up the driveway, bringing chairs and tables for eighteen hundred people. We paused to watch them park, the men jumping out to unload quickly. They cracked open doors and began piling chairs on carts, orders being shouted in every direction.
“Wow, you’re right. This is an invasion,” Ethan said. His face lit up. “It’s quite exciting.”
He handed me the smallest bag and seized the handles of the two large suitcases. Lucille must have been watching us from some window, because we didn’t get three steps up before she burst out of the entrance with two of her temporary wedding employees beside her. She muttered some orders and nodded at us. They rushed down to take the bags.
“Welcome back, Ethan,” she said. He smiled up at her and quickly hurried to kiss her on both cheeks, something she loved men and even women to do. “Semantha, why don’t you show Bob and Steve where to take the bags?” she said. “I need to steal Ethan for ten minutes before you capture all of his attention. Let’s go to the office,” she told him.
Ethan flashed a smile at me
, shrugged, and followed her obediently. I had given Daddy and her only a general idea of when Ethan would arrive, yet she pounced as if she had known the exact moment. It seemed nothing was going on in this house and on this estate without her involvement and control. It was as if she were deciding when we would all eat, sleep, and breathe. Whatever she had for Ethan surely could have waited until he was settled in and we had spent some time together. Fuming, I quickly realized that her two employees were standing there holding Ethan’s suitcases and waiting for me to give them instructions.
“Oh, just follow me up the stairs,” I said briskly, and marched in and up to Ethan’s room. I told them to leave the suitcases next to the bed. They seemed to feel my rage, because they left instantly without glancing at me or saying a word. Then I sat on his bed and pouted like a child until I heard him rushing up the stairway and down the hall.
“There you are,” he said.
“What did she want? What could she possibly want from you immediately? What couldn’t wait until you settled in after so long a trip?” I demanded, firing all of my questions in one breath. I could feel the crimson heat in my face.
“Oh, she was just nervous about my starting at the store because she’s too occupied with everything that’s going on here. She had some last-minute instructions,” he said, making it all seem innocent and unworthy of my displeasure.
He kissed my cheek and brushed my hair back.
“It could have waited,” I insisted. “You’re not going to work until after the wedding.”
“No. She wants me to start tomorrow. She thinks it’s a waste of time for me not to get right in there.”
“Tomorrow?”
“I gotta say, she’s really rooting for me, hoping I’ll be a success. Besides, she wanted to know if I had a tux for the wedding. I didn’t realize that I needed one. It’s my first real black-tie event. She picked up the phone and immediately ordered Erickson to arrange for my fitting tomorrow morning before anything else. She went on and on about the wedding and the important businesspeople I’ll meet. So many dignitaries are attending, too. I had no idea. It’s a Who’s Who of Kentucky society and then some.”
This was exactly what I didn’t want, the two of us so caught up in the wedding that we ignored each other. He saw the look on my face and added, “But I told her I just had to get back to you.”
I didn’t believe him, but I didn’t say so. He put his suitcases on the bed and began to unload them. Without another word, I helped him organize and hang up his clothes. He must have been nervous about his decision to accept the offer, because he talked without taking a breath, describing his parents’ reactions to his career decision, what he had been doing with the time he had spent at home, the impatience he’d had waiting for his moment of departure, and the weather he’d encountered on the journey.
“I hated the rain because it slowed me down.” He finally took a breath and looked at me. “And what have you been doing all this time?”
“Waiting for this wedding to be over,” I replied sharply. “It can’t end soon enough for me.”
“Hold it,” he said.
He stopped what he was doing and took my hands into his, leading me back to the settee as if I were his little girl and not his girlfriend. We both sat.
“What?”
“I know what you’re going through,” he began.
“Do you?”
“Yes, I do. It’s understandable. You’re upset because your father’s swept up in all this and not paying much attention to you. It’s natural for you to resent Lucille, too.”
“Everyone’s my therapist,” I said.
“I’m not trying to be a therapist. I’m just trying to reassure you that things will settle down, and besides, I’m here now, and I’ll be at your side and taking up your time. I’d rather you not think of anything or anyone else but me, anyway.”
“At my side? You’re going to work, Ethan. Immediately, it seems, and that will occupy you quite a bit. I’m sure she has a lot more for you to do than you can imagine. Lucille made that pretty clear when she swooped down on you the moment you arrived.”
“Yes, I know, but no matter what work they give me, I’ll be hurrying back to you at the end of the day, and we’ll spend every other waking moment together. Maybe,” he said, smiling, “sleeping moments, too. She’d better not try to interfere with that. It would take a crowbar to pry us apart.” He sounded a bit like my father. He winked.
I had to smile at his coyness.
“That’s better. That’s the girl I came rushing back to,” he said.
“And not a career with the Heaven-stone Corporation?”
“Only if it includes you.” My skeptical expression annoyed him. He let go of my hands. “Don’t you think I could get a good job elsewhere on my own? There are plenty of retail businesses looking for young, up-and-coming executives, and I have great recommendations from my college teachers and did graduate with honors, Semantha. I’m not in any sort of desperate state. I was still considering returning to college and getting my MBA, too. I have options.”
“I know. I’m sorry I said that.”
“It’s okay.” He smiled again. “You’re kind of lost in all this, but I’m here now. We’re going to have a helluva good time.” He got up to complete his unpacking.
Afterward, we went out to look at the work being done in preparation for the wedding. Lucille saw us but marched off with her assistant and the wedding planner, rattling off orders. I saw how impressed Ethan was with everything.
“This is something,” he said. “It’s one thing to hear about it but another to see it. They probably didn’t plan much more at Gettysburg.” When I didn’t react with any enthusiasm, he added, “Hey, we’re going to have a good time at this wedding, too. We’ll treat it as a party just for us.”
“You mean, as though it were our wedding?”
“Why not?”
I liked that.
“But for now,” he continued, “how about we go out to dinner ourselves tonight, or did you want to spend it at home with your father? I know they’re heading right out on their honeymoon and—”
“Are you kidding? He and Lucille don’t even know I’m at the table.”
“Then let’s just get out of here, take a ride, and stop somewhere for a quiet dinner,” he said. “I’ll go up to shower and change.”
It was like a transfusion. I felt my happiness and enthusiasm come surging back through my veins and into my heart. We laughed and charged into the house, rushing up the stairway like two people afraid they were going to miss an airplane flight.
He’s back, I thought. He’s really back because of me. He didn’t deserve my skepticism and sour face. I felt terrible for having been so negative and immature. He never really got angry about it, either. He was as patient and understanding as my uncle Perry. I was determined to make it up to him, to be more cheerful and more fun.
I was so anxious and excited I was ready before he was and went down to tell Mrs. Dobson we wouldn’t be there for dinner. I heard Lucille in the hallway by my father’s office and impishly went down to tell her, too. She might soon be the queen, I thought, but I was still the princess. However, I was disappointed in her reaction. I assumed she would want us there to listen attentively to her report to Daddy at dinner. We, especially Ethan, would be her command audience, but I was prepared to say no firmly.
“That’s very nice,” she said, smiling. “You two should be alone to catch up and make plans. Besides, you’ll both be bored with the endless details of this wedding. Enjoy.” She dismissed me with a wave and turned back to her assistant. I felt like a blow-up doll losing air and hurried away.
Ethan was just coming down the stairs.
“I told Mrs. Dobson not to set out places for us at dinner,” I said. “And then I told Lucille we’re leaving.”
“What for? She’s not your dorm mother,” Ethan joked. “From now on, I’m the only one you have to check in with, understand? And you’d bette
r, too.”
“Right, tough guy.”
He laughed, and we headed out to my car. Just as we reached the gate, we saw Daddy driving in. He stopped and rolled down his window.
“Hey, welcome back, Ethan.”
“Thank you, sir.”
“Where you guys going?”
“Just for a ride and some dinner.”
“Smart. I’d like to jump in with you. The place is a madhouse.”
“We’d love to have you,” Ethan said. “Want to come along?”
“You trying to get me assassinated?” Daddy quipped. “You look very nice, Semantha,” he said. “Have a good time.”
“Thank you, Daddy.”
“Your father is such a great guy,” Ethan said. “He deserves to be happy.”
I never said he didn’t, I thought. I just don’t know if he will be.
Ethan asked if there was anywhere in particular I’d like to go. Almost without realizing it, I directed him to follow the roads that would take us past my cousin’s home. Ethan continued to talk about our future, things he’d like to be able to do someday, and places he’d like to visit. This job, this whole new opportunity for him, was like Columbus launching his ships for the New World. His excitement was infectious, but the closer we got to Shane and Royce Norman’s home, the more nervous I became. A part of me wanted Ethan to know who lived there, but another part of me feared that he would be so shocked I had taken him there that he would be turned away from me. After all, my memories of his reaction in the motel were still quite vivid. I said nothing as we rode by. I was happy that neither Shane nor Royce was anywhere in sight.
Later, we found an intimate restaurant with a small patio overlooking acres of beautiful prime Kentucky property. We could see the horses grazing near a small pond. It looked like an oil painting, because the clouds were so still and the horses looked so content. Ethan’s enthusiasm for his work and for our continued relationship was, as Daddy would say, just what the doctor ordered. We drank wine and had a wonderful dinner. The restaurant had a violin player who went from table to table. At our table, perhaps because he saw how we were holding hands and looking into each other’s eyes, he played “La Vie en Rose.”
Secret Whispers Page 19