“That’s not true,” I said instantly. “The Sun Witches have protected us for as long as the Zodiac Wolves have existed. You must have it wrong."
"How exactly are they protecting you?"
I opened and closed my mouth a few times, but then said, "They stop us from getting the Moon Curse."
Kaden scoffed. “That? That’s a lie. The Moon Witches removed the curse hundreds of years ago. It was wrong, inhumane, and they realized that. The Sun Witches are lying to you and all of the packs so that you need them.”
“But why?” I asked, feeling as if I was very far away from my body. What Kaden was saying didn’t make any sense, but the more he talked, the more I started to question everything. “It doesn’t make any sense. They...they protect us. They help us get our wolves and our mates.”
Kaden took a step toward me, his voice heated. “No, they keep your wolves locked away until you’re twenty-two. You’ve seen the wolf pups here. Stella told me how shocked you were by them. But that's normal here, and it should be normal for all the other packs too."
I shook my head, unable to believe so much of my life was a lie. "I'm sure there's a good reason..."
"There is. The Sun Witches want to enslave all twelve packs again. They're slowly changing the amount of control they have over the Zodiac Wolves, so slowly that no one will notice or speak up about it until it's too late.”
“Why would they want us enslaved? I don’t believe you.”
“I don’t care what you believe,” Kaden said, turning away abruptly. “And none of it will matter anyway, once the other packs are wiped out.”
Back to being the same arrogant, prickly alpha. “What does any of this have to do with me?"
Kaden looked over his shoulder at me. “I suspect that your mother was a Moon Witch."
The words hit me like a punch. I started shaking my head before I could even fully comprehend them. “No. That’s not possible. She was human.” I took a step back from Kaden, his words ringing in my ears. “And even if that was true, there’s no way for me to find out because my entire family is dead.”
Kaden turned back and met my eyes, and I saw the slightest hint of humanity in them. “I'm sorry. I know what that's like."
I laughed, but it was bitter. “No, you don't. You have your sister and your pack. But me? I don’t have anyone at all.”
Something crossed his face, something that might have been pity, and I couldn't stand to look at him for another second. I had to get away from him and all the insane things he was saying. There was no way any of them were true.
I broke into a run, heading back to the house. He didn’t call after me, and I didn’t expect him to.
I didn’t stop running until I was locked inside my room, gasping for breath.
Chapter Seventeen
Over the next few days, my life settled into a routine. In the morning, I cleaned whatever place Kaden had assigned me to for the day. Then I had a quick lunch, before joining him outside for combat training, followed by wolf training with Stella.
My guards went everywhere with me during the day, tailing me close enough that it felt like they were always breathing down my neck. The only time they weren't around was when I was in the house, or training with Kaden and Stella. Clayton and Jack never hurt me though, and once I got used to being followed so closely, I found they weren’t that bad. The only problem was that Kaden had told them not to answer any of my questions, much to my dismay.
Everyone else in the town was polite to me, although no one got too close either. It had been a few years since the Ophiuchus pack had gained a new member, Stella told me, so news of my arrival had spread fast. They all seemed to be waiting for their alpha to make a decision about me, but I wasn’t called ‘half-breed’ or ‘mutt’ by these shifters, which was a nice change. I kept holding my breath and waiting for the other shoe to drop, or for the hatred to start, but after a week, I tentatively began relaxing around the pack.
The only person whose attitude remained frosty was Kaden’s. I actively spent time trying to avoid him, but living with him made that difficult. Sometimes I ate meals with Stella, and other times I took my food up to my room so I could hide.
The routine kept my mind off of my brother and everything else, and it was only when I was alone in bed that the overwhelming grief swallowed me whole again. I cried for Wesley, for Mira's parents, for every person who had ever been kind to me in the Cancer pack. I cried not knowing what had become of the people who'd stayed home during the Convergence, and whether or not any of them were still alive. I cried for the future I might have had, if not for the Leos’ betrayal.
And then, once I'd finally exhausted my grief and hoped I might be able to sleep, the mating bond thrummed to life again. It was always there, in the back of my mind, and when I was alone and quiet it was harder to ignore. The annoying tug turned to a desperate need, an aching for something—no, someone—along with the constant feeling of being unfulfilled. I'd toss and turn, desperate to put an end to the torment, but nothing worked. I even slid my hand between my thighs and tried to get myself off, hoping it would relieve the throbbing hunger in my pussy, but it was useless. Only Jordan could fix what was wrong with me.
Or Kaden, a voice whispered inside me. A voice I told to fuck right off. He wasn't my mate. Jordan was the one the gods had chosen for me, no matter how much I despised him.
I doubted Kaden would want me anyway. The man growled and glared at me anytime I had to spend any time with him. Even when he wasn't around, his presence seemed to follow me throughout my day.
In the morning, he left notes for me. Clean the community center was pinned on the fridge the morning after he’d confronted me in the forest like nothing had happened at all. I’d blinked at the note for several minutes before realizing that if I spent any more time being confused, I’d likely be late. Then the next day he sent me somewhere else, to act as that place's janitor too. Rinse and repeat.
Combat training with Kaden hadn’t gotten any easier either. I did the stretching routine Kaden showed me, and I’d stopped face-planting every time I tried to do a basic move, but beyond that, I could tell he was frustrated with my lack of progress.
On the other hand, my afternoons with Stella were coming along nicely. Being in wolf form was natural to me, unlike hand-to-hand combat. With practice, I found it easier to shift, just like Stella had said, and it became almost painless over the course of the week. It was still harder to focus in wolf form, but even that was getting easier.
I thought of the freedom that my wolf form brought me, how fast I could run, and how I could hear things so much clearer. I wanted to run for miles and miles until my wolf body couldn’t handle it anymore, and then take a nap in a clearing, maybe by a little stream that would lull me into sleep—
“Stop daydreaming,” Kaden snapped. I blinked and realized I’d been reaching for my toes for several minutes, far longer than I was supposed to. I got up and followed him to the center of the gym, which was empty except for us. He'd had me meet him here today, instead of the usual clearing, and now he led me to a punching bag.
“Show me a punch,” he said, holding onto the bag.
“What, no instructions?” I asked.
“I need to see what I’m working with. If it’s anything like the rest of this, I’ll have to take you from the very beginning.”
I bristled at his words. “It’s not my fault that my pack didn’t teach me this. My alpha never expected me to do much of anything.”
“Well, I do. Now punch the bag.” Kaden sounded almost bored, as he often did.
I hated when he acted like this. I knew he did it on purpose, probably to rile me up. Getting mad makes you stupid, he’d said once. Keep your cool. It was easier said than done, especially when he kept acting like an arrogant prick. I wound my fist back, ready to punch, imagining it was his face.
"Stop." Kaden let go of the bag suddenly and stepped back. I paused, muscles tensed to throw the punch. “Unless you w
ant to dislocate your thumb. Get it out from under your fingers.”
I complied, and Kaden held up his own hand to show me. I mirrored his clenched fist, leaving my thumb tucked alongside my fingers rather than underneath. Actually, that made a lot of sense, and I felt dumb. That was a common feeling while working with Kaden. It was as if he expected me to know everything already, and when I didn’t he got frustrated. But how was that my fault? I was doing my best to learn. I punched the bag, but it didn't move like I'd expected it to, even with my shifter strength.
“You’ll want to concentrate most of the punch in the first two knuckles,” Kaden said, pointing to them on his own hand. Then, he drew his elbow back and punched. His breath came out in a sharp noise with the punch. “Always exhale on your punches. It tightens your core, which will give you better power. If you’re going to punch someone, make sure you throw your entire body weight into it.”
He guided me through the entire process, making sure to point out that I would be engaging my hips and legs too if I was doing it properly. Then he stepped back to the bag and held it. “Try again.”
I nodded and planted my feet, then did what he'd shown me. This punch felt better, more solid, but the bag still didn’t move.
“You’re not using your hips." He slid away from the bag and moved directly behind me. "I'll show you."
My breath caught as Kaden pulled my body flush against his, one hand on my hip, and the other reaching out to encircle my wrist. What felt like an electric shock went through my whole body, rendering me useless. I moved, supple and pliant in his grasp as he twisted my hip back and extended my hand for me.
He was saying something, but the words didn’t register. His hand felt hot enough to burn, just sitting there on my hip. Nothing he’d done had ever felt like this before. I could almost imagine that his hand would slide over my body, splaying flat on my stomach to hold me against him for an entirely different reason. His mouth wouldn’t be telling me how to throw a punch but would brush my neck, moving slowly, surely. The hand circling my wrist would meet mine, intertwining with my fingers.
The image was so vivid, so real, that I staggered with the effect of it. I might have fallen if I hadn’t been pressed so thoroughly against the hard line of Kaden’s body. But then again, I wouldn’t be in this situation at all if Kaden hadn’t grabbed me like this.
Kaden’s hand tightened around my wrist, as he drew my hand back and moved it through the right motion again. His hand did slide a little more onto my stomach, and I actually stopped breathing, wondering if I was going insane. I was certain Kaden could hear the way my heart thundered in my chest, or smell the lust from between my thighs. But if he noticed, he didn’t say anything, and after a moment, he stepped back.
I swayed, still caught in the moment, wondering what would happen if I tilted my head back to encourage him to kiss me. I was caught halfway between reality and the fantasy, and it took a sharp, “Again,” from Kaden to fully pull me out.
I shook my head and tried to remember what Kaden had said. I could still feel his hand on my hip, and I moved the way he’d moved it, making sure to exhale as I punched.
“Like that?” I asked, and if Kaden noticed that the tone was just this side of breathy, he didn’t say a damn thing.
“Better. Again.”
I punched the bag a few more times, making sure to engage my whole body each time. The strange spell that had been cast over me faded, and although Kaden was still distracting, at least he was distracting over there and not touching me.
"That’s enough for today. Let’s move on.” Kaden let go of the bag and lifted his shirt over his head. He seemed to be allergic to wearing a decent amount of clothing, no matter the occasion. The number of times I’d wandered downstairs to find him standing in the kitchen in just sweats or jeans was bordering on ridiculous. I should have been desensitized by this point, but with a body like that, I doubted I’d get used to it anytime soon. And seriously, gray sweatpants? Was he trying to make me wet?
We moved into hand-to-hand combat next, which was my least favorite part of training because it felt so hopeless. Kaden was a true warrior, through and through, but that wasn't me. I was a scrappy survivor who somehow weaseled out of every bad situation, not a fighter. When things got bad, I ran. No amount of training would ever fix my true nature.
Kaden seemed to disagree though, or why else would he keep doing this? I could tell he was holding back though—probably good, or I’d end up getting punched in the nose—but I still couldn't land a blow on him.
It didn't help that I could still feel him pressed against me, holding me in such a casual, yet intimate way. My gaze slipped to his bare torso, and I soaked up the sight of all those muscles in all the right places. He’d been so hot against me, so hard. Like that day at the waterfall, when he'd been on top of me.
One of Kaden's blows glanced off of my temple, my instincts allowing me to pull my head away at the last second. Shit, I needed to focus or I was going to get knocked out.
“Good,” Kaden said. “You’re getting better.”
Right as he said that, he shoved his hand flat against my sternum. The blow sent me sprawling on the ground. I tried to go into a tuck and roll to break the fall but didn’t quite manage it. I still was able to avoid hurting myself, but it wasn't very graceful.
“You can’t just say that, and then do that,” I said, trying to catch my breath. It hadn’t been hard enough to hurt, but it had taken the wind out of me.
"You seemed distracted." Kaden stepped up to me and held his hand out. I frowned at it, remembering the first day. Right. I took his hand, expecting him to fling me over his shoulder, but he simply lifted me up, arm muscles flexing.
Then he pulled me close and lightly touched my temple, his brow furrowed. Inspecting me to make sure he hadn't really injured me, I realized. Kaden's other hand still clutched mine tightly, and it had become hard to breathe, or move, or even think. Desire and longing made my chest tighten almost painfully, and I found myself reaching up to touch the soft, dark stubble on his jaw. But when my fingertips lightly brushed against him, he jerked back, like he'd been burned.
We stepped apart, and I pressed a hand to my chest, wishing I could calm my runaway heart. He's not your mate, I reminded myself. But my body wouldn't listen.
“Again,” Kaden said, but his voice sounded a bit off.
I took a deep breath and tried to stay focused on the fight, not the fighter. We exchanged a few experimental jabs, and suddenly I saw an opening. I didn’t know if it was purposeful, but he’d overextended in a punch, leaving his side vulnerable. I struck out quickly. He saw my fist coming for him and contorted, dancing out of range, but I felt my knuckles brush his ribs.
I let out a shocked laugh as I stepped back. “I almost hit you."
Kaden looked as surprised as I felt, but it faded from his eyes just as quickly. “You’re becoming more confident in your body, in its instincts. The more you listen to it, the easier this will be. You keep getting in your head and second-guessing where your muscles want you to go. It’s what trips you up the most.”
We continued, and though I didn’t come close to landing any more blows, the rest of the training session went without a hitch. Kaden continued to correct my positions, but he didn’t pull me against him again. I shoved the disappointment down.
Finally, Kaden called a halt. I noticed I wasn’t breathing quite as hard as I had been for the first few days. It was a small, but welcome improvement. Maybe soon I would go through this entire routine without breaking a sweat, like Kaden.
We cooled down, doing some light stretches. We usually did these in silence, so I was surprised when Kaden spoke up. “Stella says you’re doing well with your wolf training.”
I shrugged, ducking my head at the praise. "I'm still not that good at tracking, but I'm trying."
Kaden paused and appraised me. “The pack is going on a hunt tonight. Maybe you'd like to join us."
I froze, his words
catching me completely off guard. Kaden was very protective of his pack, and I knew he didn’t want me interacting with most of them until he felt I was trustworthy. This would put me in the thick of them, almost like a real member of their pack.
“I’d like that." Maybe if I spent more time interacting with the rest of the pack, Kaden would see I meant them no harm. I might even get him to trust me more.
Kaden nodded curtly and stood. “Be ready to leave at sunset. The deer are more active at night.”
He left the gym without another word, abruptly ending our training session the same way he always did. I rolled my eyes and grabbed a towel to wipe off the sweat, then headed outside, where Jack and Clayton were waiting for me. Of course.
"Good session?" Jack asked, as they fell into step on either side of me. He was pretty handsome, with blond hair and a charming smile. "Seems like you worked up a sweat. It looks good on you."
Oh, and he was a total flirt, I was starting to realize. Everything he said was harmless though, and I had to admit it was nice to be flirted with instead of belittled or bullied all the time. "Yeah, it was great. I actually got a blow in."
"On Kaden?" Clayton asked. He was big, built like a grizzly bear, and a lot quieter, but now he turned his warm brown eyes upon me with surprise.
"Well, it was more like a graze," I said with a shrug.
"That counts," Jack said. "Own it."
I grinned a little as we kept walking through the town. "He invited me to come on a hunt tonight too."
"He did?" Clayton stroked his beard. "Are you certain?"
My grin fell. "I think so. His words were pretty clear."
Clayton gave me a long look as if seeing me in a different light. "He's never invited an outsider on a hunt before. Not even ones who wanted to join our pack."
"Is that a good thing?" I asked, suddenly unsure of myself.
Moon Touched (Zodiac Wolves: The Lost Pack Book 1) Page 13