But even worse than that was the urge to cross the distance between us. It grew and grew until I had to stand up, or I felt like I’d die right there. “I’m going insane,” I said, pacing back and forth, trying to get the energy out. It didn’t do a damn bit of good.
“You can’t get to your mate,” Kaden said with a frown. “That must be why.”
I threw my hands up in the air as I paced behind the couch, trying to get further away from him before I made a very bad decision. “I don’t even want my mate!”
Kaden's eyes narrowed at me. "You say that, but your body says otherwise. I can smell it."
Anger burst through the desire at his words. This was just like the other night with my dream. I wanted nothing to do with Jordan. How could I get that through his thick skull?
"It's not him I want, it's—"
As soon as the words were out, I slapped a hand over my mouth. Kaden's eyes widened at my admission. Shit, I hadn't meant to say that out loud. I turned away, wishing I had never admitted how much I wanted him, feeling vulnerable as hell, and still so turned on I thought I might die.
"Ayla..." The sound of my name on his lips was so sensual it made me tremble with need. I turned back to see his fingers curling around the armchair edges, nostrils flared wide as if he was taking in my scent again. He let out a shuddering breath and closed his eyes, his knuckles going white as he clutched the chair. "We can't."
I could hear the edge of lust in his voice, and that’s what really set me over the edge. "Why not?"
His jaw moved as he swallowed. "You should go to your room. Watch TV. Read a book. Try to distract yourself."
"We both know that won't help." There would be no way to get through this alone. I ground my teeth, trying one last time to take control over my traitorous body, but it didn’t do any good. I needed release. I needed him.
I crossed the space between us as if drawn to him. This pull didn’t feel the same as the mating bond with Jordan, but it was just as strong. I dropped to my knees beside his chair, ready to beg, to debase myself, whatever it took. If I’d been any saner, I would've had too much pride to do such a thing, but the need in my body was so strong I didn't care.
"Ayla," he said, a warning in his voice. A warning I chose to ignore.
“Please,” I whispered. “Please help me.”
I watched his resolve shatter, like a glass ceiling falling. The careful control he had over his body unwound, and he let go of his death grip on the chair and pulled me into his lap. His touch ignited the fire inside me and I moved to kiss him, but he stopped me with a hand on my lips.
“I can offer you some relief with my fingers," he said. "But nothing more."
"Thank you," I said with a whimper. Anything to get this awful heat out of me, and the feeling that I was literally coming apart at the seams from lust.
He shifted me on the chair for better access, and then he yanked my dress up to my thighs. Low, animal noises escaped my throat as his strong fingers gripped my knees and spread my legs. I reached for my panties, trying to get them off quickly, but Kaden’s hands pushed mine aside.
"You're soaked," he murmured, and that only made me whimper even more. His knuckles brushed against the pounding heat of me, and I sucked in a shuddering breath.
“Please,” I said. “Just keep going.”
His jaw tightened, and he pressed a hand down onto my pelvis, holding me still.
“Let me get these off,” he said, tugging at the soaked underwear.
I nodded, trying to think past the pounding need, and how that single brush of his knuckles across my sex had felt like so much more. I lifted my hips slightly to let him slide off my underwear and closed my eyes against the feeling of the air against my bare skin. It was just this side of not enough that I groaned in frustration. I reached for Kaden, putting my hand on his chest. I needed him to touch me, now.
He grabbed my hands and pushed them down to my sides. “Don’t touch me. I touch you, not the other way around."
His eyes were cold, detached, as if he was telling me about the weather, not working to help me get off. I nodded and quivered beneath him, so slick that it felt like I was dripping onto the chair beneath us.
Even through the haze of desire, I paused as his words registered. “Do you not want to do this?”
“I want it too much. Being around you right now is difficult. All I want,” he said, as his fingers tightened around my wrists, “is to rip your clothes off and fuck you senseless.”
The words sent another bolt of desire through me, and I moaned as if he’d just licked down my body. I wanted that too, and it was such a relief to know my lust wasn't one-sided. For a second, I'd worried he was only doing this out of some sense of duty or pity.
"Then touch me," I said.
With a growl, he released my wrists and slid one hand down to the throbbing ache between my thighs. Then he dragged his fingers lightly across my slit, finger dipping inside just enough to cause my breath to sharpen. I shuddered, body quivering with the need to move, to chase that touch, make it more concrete.
“Stop fucking teasing me,” I ground out.
Kaden made a low rumbling sound that was almost a laugh, and I looked up to glare at him, but just then he stroked his thumb along my clit in a delicious, torturous slide. He followed it up with another stroke, and then slid two of his fingers inside of me, while keeping his thumb on my clit. I shut my eyes so tight that little spots of light danced at the edge of my vision, while he worked his fingers in and out of me, giving me exactly what I'd needed all this time. His other hand found my breast, touching my rock-hard nipples, and I couldn’t hold myself still any longer. I ground myself on his hand, chasing that feeling, wanting even more.
“How the hell are you so good at this?” I gasped out.
“I’m unmated, not celibate."
Kaden increased the tempo, circling my clit with his thumb and crooking his fingers inside of me, pistoning them in and out as if it was his cock instead. He was almost brutal, too quick, and too skilled to bring me to a gentle orgasm. No, this one was going to tear through me with something I'd never experienced before. I’d certainly never been able to bring myself this much pleasure with my own fingers.
I shuddered around him, hands clenching into fists, nails digging into my skin with the effort to not touch him. Then the need that was pounding through my body all seemed to gather in my pussy, laser-focused into a single point of desire, before exploding to the rest of me. My eyes rolled back with the intensity of my orgasm, and I let out a low moan. Kaden’s fingers continued their rhythm, working me through the orgasm while I twitched against him. Finally, he released me, fingers leaving my body, and I leaned against his chest, breathless and trembling.
He rested his hands on the arms of the chair again, gripping them like it was all he could do not to touch me further. I opened my mouth to thank Kaden, when the next wave of desire poured over me, as subtle as a train. My back arched, my nipples straining against the fabric of my dress, and I moaned.
"That didn't work," I said, my voice desperate as I tried to get a handle on the wave of need. I gripped Kaden's shoulders, and when our eyes met, I found a well of lust waiting, deep and untamed. He could probably smell just how unsatisfied I was. He’d just made me come, but it had seemed to make things worse, not better. “I feel like I’m going to burn up. Kaden, please...”
"Damn," he said, his brow creased in frustration. "You need sex. Nothing else will do."
“Don’t sound so enthusiastic, you might ruin the mood,” I gasped out, trying desperately to hold onto whatever semblance of my sanity I had with the sarcasm. It didn't work, and I found myself grinding my wet pussy against Kaden's lap, where I felt his hard length under his pants. He wanted me too, so why weren't we fucking already?
He grabbed my hips to still me, but that only turned me on even more. "Do you realize what you're asking for?"
"Yes!" Of course I knew. I'd been begging for it for what seeme
d like hours now. "If you don't help me, I'll have to find someone else who can."
"No fucking way." His hands cupped my breasts through my thin dress and squeezed, and it was enough to make me moan and stop squirming against him. "The only man who will touch you tonight is me."
"Then get on with it already," I said, but then paused as a tiny bit of common sense returned to my brain for a split second. "Wait. Will I get pregnant?”
He shook his head. "I don't think so. I'm not your mate."
My mind must have really been gone because I thought I heard bitterness in his voice. I wasn't sure though, because I was too hung up on the idea of having Kaden’s wolf pups. It’s a shame he won’t get me pregnant, I thought, and then shook my head violently, shoving the crazy thought away.
"Then what's the problem?" I asked.
He pinched my breasts almost painfully, sending a bolt of pleasure straight through me. "The problem is it can never be more than one night. Do you understand?"
"I understand." I leaned closer to him, breathing in his musky scent, while my animal instincts fought for control. I'd wanted him in my dream, and I wanted him even more now. If it was only for one night, I'd take it. “Kaden, please fuck me."
The words seemed to break down some wall inside of him as if he’d been holding back before. Kaden bared his teeth, the burn of desire clear in his gaze. In that look, I saw the alpha wolf in him, the dangerous male who had kidnapped me and threatened to kill me if I hurt anyone he loved. He grabbed my dress and yanked it over my head in one smooth flourish. I wasn't wearing a bra underneath, and now I was completely exposed to his hungry, roaming eyes. He pulled me close and pressed his nose to my neck, breathing me in, but not kissing me. Never kissing me.
"As you wish, little wolf."
Chapter Twenty-Four
Kaden tossed me on the couch without ceremony and looked down at me like a king gazing at his domain. His eyes traced every line of my naked body. My legs. My breasts. My scars. It was all on display for him, and though I was tempted to cover myself, I didn't. Maybe the heat madness made me braver, or maybe I felt more comfortable with Kaden than anyone else in my life, but for once I wanted him to see me. All of me.
"Fuck, you're beautiful," he said, and his praise struck through the lust haze and made my stomach flip-flop. No man had ever said such a thing to me before.
He reached down to his jeans, unzipping them. I could see the bulge there, and I had to hold my hands down before I sat up and offered to do it myself. I doubted my help would be welcome. He hadn’t wanted me to touch him before, and just because we were going to have sex didn’t mean that had changed anything. He was only doing this because he had to, because we were out of options.
He stripped off his jeans, leaving him completely nude. I’d seen him in various states of undress since I’d known him, but this was different. Knowing why he was naked now held a different kind of weight. All the other times I'd tried—and failed—to avoid staring at his magnificent body, but this time I let my gaze trace down his abs, to the sharp vee of his hips, and then lower. This time I could really take a good, long look.
His cock was a thing of art, perfectly proportioned to his large size, rock hard and jutting toward me. I swallowed audibly at the sight. I wanted to sink myself down onto it until he was so deep inside of me, I’d feel full enough to sate this overwhelming need. I wanted to slide my tongue along the vein on the underside, just to see if I could get him to lose a bit of his control. I was almost overwhelmed with the possibilities, and the irony was I had no idea how to do any of them. My body seemed to have its own ideas though, but I was still a bit nervous at my lack of experience. No amount of lust could override the fact that I’d never had sex before.
Kaden stalked toward me like the predator he was, and I drew in a sharp breath. He sank to his knees in front of where I lay, presented like an offering, and drew his cock into his hand. His eyes roamed over my legs, spread wide, and I watched his nostrils flare as he looked at my sex. A spark of something passed through his gaze, and his grip tightened around his cock.
"If we had more time, I'd make you come with my mouth," he said. "But I don't think that's what you need right now."
I let out a little whimper and arched my hips up at that. Honestly, that sounded amazing, but he was right. I needed him inside me. Nothing else would do.
When he looked back up at me, his eyes were dark, darker than I’d ever seen them, just a thin ring of blue around pupils blown huge. He wanted this as much as I did. The knowledge flooded me with desire and I nearly dragged him on top of me. But then he frowned slightly as he looked at my face, and he must have seen something hidden under the pure, base want, because he said, “You’ve never done this before, have you?"
I shook my head but wasn’t able to find any words, feeling frustrating beyond measure. My body screamed for me to pull him closer, to reach down and be the one to put his cock inside, but my mind was stuck on the mechanics of it. Apprehension twisted in my gut, but it was overpowered by the need to have Kaden pounding the heat out of me with his cock. “No, it's my first time," I managed to say.
He grimaced, and he looked like he was forcibly holding himself back. “You do realize that the moment I’m inside you, I won’t be able to help myself, right? I'll try to be gentle, but the heat frenzy makes it difficult.”
I hadn't realized my heat was affecting him so much too, but now I saw it in the crinkles around his eyes, the straining of his shoulders, and the tightness of his mouth. He was doing everything in his power not to fuck me senseless. The thought that he wanted me so badly turned me on even more, and I moaned and arched my hips. He wouldn’t hurt me, that much I knew. "Please, just hurry."
Kaden slid his hands along my waist and exhaled as if he’d been holding his breath for a long time. He looked into my eyes as he parted the lips of my pussy with his cock, sliding alongside my entrance a few times before actually pushing into the wet heat of me. It was agonizingly slow, and I felt him holding himself back by the way his muscles trembled and the tight press of his hands against my hips, almost painful. I kept my eyes on his face, watching his reaction as he entered me, though I was torn. I wanted to look down, to see his flesh disappearing into mine, but his face seemed more important right now. When he bottomed out, he was practically vibrating. I shifted slightly, trying to let myself settle around him.
“Are you good?” His voice was so rugged it hardly sounded like words.
"Yes. Don't stop." I shifted again, and his hands clenched around my hips. It wasn’t painful like I’d expected, I just felt incredibly full.
Kaden growled, and drew himself out, and thrust back in. I let out a noise, unable to help it, my hands flying to his arms. I wanted something to hang onto. He thrust again, slowly, surely, and I felt that slight tremor running through him, even as his cock nudged at a spot of pure pleasure, dragging along it on both the up and downstroke. What remained of the discomfort faded, and my hips tried to lift to encourage him to move. I needed so much more to sate the ravenous beast inside me.
“Come on,” I gasped out as he drew himself almost completely out of me. “Fuck me like you mean it. You won’t hurt me. You couldn’t."
"Is this what you want?" His eyes met mine, his own need smoldering inside of them. Then he slammed into me hard, all the way to the hilt.
"Yes!" I gasped and raised my hips up against his hands, but he pushed me back down, holding me in place. That felt good, too.
Kaden bottomed out, and when he drew out again, he plunged his cock back inside of me faster. He picked up the tempo and set a punishing pace, never letting my hips up to match him. He had complete control of the situation, and I loved it.
Flesh slapped against flesh every time he pounded into me, as our animal instincts took over and drove us into a frenzy. It built with each thrust until I was riding the high of it, wishing it would never end. Kaden was laser-focused on fucking me, breathing hard as he plunged his cock inside of m
e again and again, bringing me closer to pleasure.
"Fuck, you feel so good," he said. "Like you were made to take my cock."
"More," I said, gasping the word. "I'm close."
By the way his breathing hitched, I knew he was close to coming as well. I had to plant my feet to keep my position, and finally, he let me thrust my hips back into him, hands sliding down to grasp my ass. He lifted me up to stroke new parts of me with his cock, and my pleasure reached new heights.
He let out a moan, the first one I’d heard from him, and it was what sent me over the edge. My legs wrapped around him, pulling him in as deep as he could go, and I ground myself on his cock, riding the waves of pleasure. Through the blur of it, I could feel his length pulsing with his own orgasm, thrusting as deep as he could go. His release was hot inside of me, another added sensation that prolonged my own orgasm.
When I came down off my high, I felt like jelly, and let myself fall back against the sofa. Kaden let me slide through his fingers, cock slipping out of me. I winced, the feeling new and fresh, but good, nonetheless. I was panting hard as if I’d just run a mile. I had to lay there for a few moments before I could string enough words together to make a sentence.
“Thank you,” was all I could say, my voice husky as if I’d been screaming. I probably had, at the end there. I could hardly remember. I wanted to say that was amazing, but I knew that wouldn’t be received well. When I glanced at Kaden, still looming above me, his eyes were emotionless.
“I’m just doing my duty,” he said.
I frowned at that and realized he'd never kissed me, not even once. It really was just sex, wasn't it—nothing more, nothing less.
I didn't have time to think about that though, because another wave of blinding desire came over me. I groaned and found myself arching my hips toward him again, my nipples hard as stone. I couldn't help but slide my hands between my legs, desperate for more relief.
Moon Touched (Zodiac Wolves: The Lost Pack Book 1) Page 18