“Denke.”
He was reminded of the pies his mother used to make. They were every bit as good as Valerie’s.
“I called around to see Violet. Well, to say goodbye, but I heard she’s staying at Lily’s.”
“Oh, I didn’t know.”
He nodded.
“You can’t leave without saying goodbye to her.”
He studied her expression to see whether Violet might have said something to her about him. “I know. I wouldn’t do that.”
“What time do you start work in the morning?”
“Around nine. Why?”
“I happen to know that Violet gets to the markets way before that. Perhaps you could catch her there.” A smile turned up the corners of her lips.
“Yeah, I’ll do that.” He started on the fruit salad. “Thanks again for everything you’ve done, Valerie. I don’t know what I would’ve done without having you organize everything for me.” He rubbed his forehead.
“I didn’t do much.”
“Yes, you did. It would’ve been easier if I’d had a brother or a sister, or someone to help. I should’ve been able to handle things by myself at my age, but I lost it.”
“I understand.”
“I couldn’t believe she was gone and before I got my head around it, there were all these decisions to make. I knew she wanted an Amish funeral, of course, but not being in the community, it was hard to organize everything.”
Valerie said, “Everyone needs help at a time like that.”
“You took a load off my shoulders. I’ll never forget what you did, and you thought of all the little things the day of the funeral, like having Ed Bontrager collect me and take me to the bishop’s house.”
“I was happy to do it. I’m used to organizing things.”
“I’m not.” He continued enjoying his dessert.
“You’re always welcome back, you know. If you decide to return.”
“Thanks. You and a few others have made me feel like I’d like to return, but it’s a huge decision to make and this isn’t the best time to do it, while I’m upset about my mother.”
“You’re right. You need to have a good think about it.”
After they finished dessert, they had coffee and talked for a little longer.
* * *
The next morning, Nathan was getting dressed when his cell phone rang. It was one of his housemates, Ben. He told Nathan that Abe had given notice. Abe had gotten a job elsewhere and he had to move.
“We’ll have to advertise the room if we can’t find anyone we know, otherwise, we’ll have to chip in for more rent.”
“I know,” Ben replied. “I’m just giving you a heads up. I wasn’t sure when you’d be back.”
“Yeah, thanks, neither was I. I’ve decided I’m coming back now, anyway. I’ll clean up here tonight and then I’ll be home late tonight.”
“Okay, I’ll see you then. How did the funeral go?”
“It went well. Pretty much how I expected.”
“Sorry I didn’t go, but you know how I feel around those people.”
“Yeah, I know. It’s okay.”
When Nathan ended the conversation, it struck him that it was odd to be paying rent somewhere when he could be living in his family home. And if he didn’t live there, he could lease it to someone and at least then he would be getting money for it. It would pay his lease in town and then have some leftover.
He had to figure out what to do with his life and figure it out fast. He didn’t want to leave his family home vacant and now there was the problem of one of his housemates moving out. Was that a sign? Sign or not, he knew he had to get some kind of direction. If Violet was seriously interested in him, that could be his deciding point that could tip him over to return to the community. If she wasn’t, then he’d have to have another good think about everything.
Glancing at the clock on the mantle, he figured if he hurried he’d have enough time to see Violet at the markets before he started work. He wouldn’t mention he was going to her Uncle Hezekiah’s birthday dinner. Maybe if she thought he was leaving and she wouldn’t see him again, that would prompt her to reveal any feelings she had for him.
* * *
After Violet had finished her morning delivery, she was wheeling the empty trolley back to the wagon when she got a surprise. Nathan was walking toward her. The markets weren’t open for business because it was still too early. Has he come here to see me? He looked directly at her and when he came closer, he smiled and gave her a wave. He stopped when she was a few yards away and she was left to close the distance between them with a few more cautious steps. She was relieved when he spoke first.
“Hello, Violet.”
“Hi. What brings you here?” If she’d known she’d be seeing him that day, she would’ve worn a nicer dress and one of her newly sewn prayer kapps.
“You do. You bring me here.” He chuckled, which made her relax slightly. She was about to say something when he spoke again. “I was hoping to catch you before I leave.”
“Where are you going?” The last thing she wanted to hear was that he was going somewhere.
He rubbed his neck. “I’m not sure in the long term, but right now I’m heading back to my old life. One of the guys has moved out of the house and fairly soon we’ll have to find someone else to take his place.”
She knew he was living with a couple of Amish men who were either left the Amish completely or were still on their rumspringa. She wasn’t totally certain which. “Why would you want to live in a place with other people when you can have one all to yourself? Why not stay at your mudder’s haus?” She knew now that she’d been wrong to think he cared for her, and she felt foolish. He probably liked her as a friend, but nothing else if he could leave so easily. She had hoped that being amongst the Amish again he would realize that’s where he belonged.
“I told you how I feel about being back here.”
“I know, but you don’t live that far away. Couldn’t you live in your haus at least, and travel to work every day from there?” Her desire for him to move back to his house was so she could see more of him, since she lived fairly close and if he lived closer to the community, he’d be more inclined to see what he was missing out on.
“You know what I mean. It kind of wouldn’t be the same. I’m in a routine where I live and it’s not nice being in the house with my mother gone.”
Violet nodded and tried her best to hide how disappointed she was. “Are you going for good and leaving the house empty?”
“I don’t know what I’m doing with the house yet. I’ll most likely sell it. That might be the best thing to do.”
“Really?” Violet’s stomach churned. Selling the house was so final, and that meant that she might never see him again.
“Yes. I might as well. Maybe I’ll buy another house one day. Anyway, I didn’t want to leave without saying goodbye. You’ve been nice to me and I wanted you to know that I appreciate it. You and Valerie have given me a lot of emotional support, especially the day of the funeral. That’s when I needed it. I said goodbye to Valerie last night and I stopped by your haus on the way back and they said you weren’t there.”
Violet gasped. “Who did you talk to at my place?”
“Your mother.”
Now Violet was annoyed. Her mother could’ve easily told him she was at Lily’s. She visualized exactly how it all played out. She could imagine her mother’s steely, determined face when Nathan stood at the door of her home and asked where she was. “What did she say?”
“I asked for a quick word with you and she said you weren’t there.”
“Did she say where I was?”
He shook his head. “No. That’s all she said.”
“Oh. Did she ask you inside at least?”
He chuckled. “No. It was your sister. When I was leaving, she ran after me and told me I could find you at Lily’s.”
“She did? How did that happen?”
“Just as I wa
s leaving, she opened the front door and ran after me. Then before she was called back, she told me you were staying at Lily’s and then she said you’d be at the flower markets early this morning.”
Violet smiled, picturing her sister doing that good deed, risking a huge punishment from their parents. Denke, Willow.
“I don’t think your mother likes me, or your father for that matter. Willow was pulled inside and the door was closed.” He shook his head.
“Don’t take it personally. He’s just concerned that I don’t spend too much time with people who aren’t in the community. To him, you’re an outsider. He’s only being protective.”
“I know. I will be like that when I’m a father—overprotective.”
“I’m glad you came to say goodbye. You’ll be missed.”
He gave a little laugh as though he doubted that he would be. “Would you be able to do one thing for me, Violet?”
“Sure. What is it?”
“Could you tell your Aunt Nancy that I won’t be able to make it to your onkel’s birthday?”
Her mouth fell open in surprise that he’d been invited, considering what her parents thought of him, and she knew that Aunt Nancy would’ve discussed the guest list with her mudder. She gave a cough, hoping it would cover her instant reaction. “I’ll tell her. She’ll be disappointed. We’ll all be sad you’re not staying.”
They stared at each other for a moment before he spoke. “Goodbye, Violet.”
In that moment, Violet felt a spark between them. Could he feel it too? “Couldn’t you wait another few days, at least until after my Onkel Hezekiah’s birthday?”
He smiled at her. “Once I make up my mind about something, I don’t rest until I follow through with it.”
If he truly liked her, he’d move heaven and earth to be with her. She wasn’t going to push him. “I understand. You’ll be welcome if you ever come back. And I hope you come back one day soon.”
“Denke, Violet. I tell you what …”
“Jah?” She held her breath and felt her heart pumping hard.
“I will think about it over the next few weeks. I’m at a point in my life that I need to make some decisions. I’ve been drifting ever since my father died and now that my mother’s gone, it’s time I made some kind of a life for myself, somewhere, somehow.”
Violet nodded. “I know what you mean.”
He chuckled. “I’m not even sure I know what I mean. I just need to know where I’m going in life. I don’t even know why you’ve been so nice to me. I can’t be appealing as a man since you’ve seen my weak side. A woman like you should be friends with a solid, dependable man who knows where life is going to take him—knows what he wants.”
“You’ll figure it out.”
He pressed his lips together and nodded while he looked down at the trolley she’d been pushing. “Where are you taking this?”
“Over to the Walkers’ wagon.” She nodded her head in the direction of the wagon in the distance.
He moved forward and took hold of it. “I’ll help you.”
“Denke.”
Together, they headed out of the farmers market and over to where the wagon was parked in silence. Once he had pushed the trolley up the ramp of the wagon and secured it in the back, he shut the back door and bolted it. “There, all done.”
“Denke, Nathan. I’ll miss you.”
“Will you?” He smiled at her.
“Very much.” She had to let him know she liked him without saying it in so many words.
“I might be back. I will make some decisions soon. Bye, Violet.”
“Bye, Nathan.”
He turned to leave and she watched him walk away. She wondered if that was the man she was going to marry. Perhaps God had His hand on him and He’d bring him back to her. That was certainly what she hoped, and what she prayed for. At least she knew that he cared for her in some way since he’d taken the time to find her just now.
Chapter 9
Lily and Violet arrived home late, only half an hour before Elijah came home. They’d bought cooked chickens and all they had to do for the meal was prepare the vegetables and the salads.
Elijah had arrived home not long after they’d started in the kitchen, and minutes after he arrived, they heard Benjamin’s buggy drawing up to the house.
After Lily had looked out the window, she said, “He’s here already. He can talk to Elijah in the living room until the dinner’s ready.”
Lily had gone from a giggling girl to a wife who was worried about preparing food for guests. She seemed a different person compared to the one she’d been before she’d gotten married. Violet wondered how her personality might change if she too got married.
“This isn’t a set-up, is it?” Violet whispered to Lily.
Lily stopped what she was doing and looked over at Violet. “Nee, not at all. I’m not my mudder.”
The girls giggled.
“That’s a relief,” Violet said.
Lily tipped her head to the side. “Although, he’d make a good husband.”
Violet slapped her lightly on her arm. “Don’t start.”
“Okay. I’ll behave.” She lowered her voice. “He’s handsome, don’t you think?”
“Jah, he is. But I’m looking for more than that in a man.”
“Violet, that’s not what I meant. Of course you’d need more than that, but at the same time it doesn't hurt to have a man who’s nice both on the inside and the outside. It’ll give you something nice to look at and make you happy.”
“It’s good to be happy. Everyone wants that.” Looks had never been important to Violet. It was what was inside that counted most. Although having a handsome man wasn’t a bad thing.
* * *
When they'd all taken seats around the dinner table, they said their silent prayers of thanks for the food. Benjamin’s gaze swept across the food as soon as he opened his eyes and as he did so, Violet studied him. His skin was tanned and his eyes were a shade of deep hazel, which complemented his olive skin tone perfectly. When he looked over at her, he smiled, revealing his straight white teeth.
“This all looks wunderbaar,” Benjamin said, looking from Violet to Lily.
“Try the chicken. It’s Lily’s special recipe,” Elijah said with a grin.
Violet held in her laughter, figuring Lily must often buy the cooked chickens when she was working late. Elijah didn’t seem to mind his working wife taking shortcuts with meals.
They all helped themselves to the food in the center of the table.
“How are you liking it here?” Violet asked Benjamin.
“It’s so good that I’ve decided to stay on.”
Violet nodded. “Oh, really?”
He chuckled. “Yeah. I hear your onkel’s having a big birthday dinner, Violet. I suppose you’re going?”
“Jah, are you?”
He nodded before he popped a forkful of chicken in his mouth.
Benjamin was the kind of man that her parents would like to see her with—someone who had strong family ties to the Amish community, who was hardworking, and who was strong and dependable. He’d never put a step wrong and had never left the community.
“I heard that Nathan Beiler hasn’t stayed on with us,” Elijah said, mainly to Benjamin.
“Has he left? I thought he’d only just returned,” Benjamin replied.
“Do you know him, Benjamin?” Violet asked.
“I met him at the funeral. His mudder’s funeral, just the other day.”
Violet nodded. “He might come back.”
“You seem particularly close to him, Violet,” Elijah said.
“He was a friend, ever since schul—still is, I suppose.”
“He’ll find his way,” Benjamin said.
There was no judgment in Benjamin’s comment, and Violet liked that.
“Still, it’s a shame he’s gone. We need more people in the community, especially young people. Now, who wants dessert?” Lily asked.
&n
bsp; “I do,” Elijah said.
“Me too,” Benjamin added.
“I guess that’s all of us.”
Violet helped Lily remove the plates and bowls from the meal, and then she helped with the dessert of fruit salad with cream and ice-cream. There was also apple pie that Lily had bought from the markets. Working five and a half days a week, it was nearly impossible to have a clean house, do all the washing, and cook all the meals from scratch. Something had to give, and for Lily, it had been the cooking. It didn’t hurt to buy a thing or two from the markets.
Violet sat down again just as Lily put the last of the dessert plates on the table.
“I don’t know how you manage to do all this and work at the flower stall as well, Lily,” Benjamin said.
“She’s amazing. It’s true,” Elijah said before Lily could respond.
Lily gave an embarrassed giggle instead of giving a reply.
“You work too, don’t you, Violet?” Benjamin asked.
“Only three days a week, mostly, and more when they need me. I deliver the flowers from where they’re grown to the markets. Some of the flowers are flown in, if they’re out of season, but most are grown locally right next door to Hezekiah and Nancy’s haus.”
He nodded, appearing not very interested in the details.
“Here, have some apple pie.” Elijah stood and cut a slice of pie for Benjamin. “Anyone else?” he asked.
“I’ll have a small piece,” Violet said.
Elijah sat down after he’d served the pie, taking a sizable piece for himself.
When dinner was over, Lily and Violet washed the dishes in the kitchen while Elijah and Benjamin sat out in the living room.
When they were halfway through the washing up, Elijah stuck his head around the kitchen door. “How about making us kaffe, Lily?”
“Sure, coming right up,” Lily said. When she’d made up the tray with the coffee items, she gave the tray to Violet. “You take this out and stay with them. It won't take me long to finish up in here.”
“Are you sure?”
“Of course. I’ll be out soon.” She made shooing motions with her hands, so Violet took the tray to the men in the living room.
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