“Thank you,” was all I could manage amidst the emotion caught in my throat.
Inside, Tanner paid for an hour of practice, along with ammo and paper targets. We were given eye and ear protection, which we were instructed to put on before entering the range.
“It’s loud in there, especially for first-timers,” said the range officer, Billy. “But don’t worry—as long as you follow my instructions and rules, you’ll be safe.”
Tanner and I exchanged glances and nodded.
The sound of shots firing filled the air as soon as Billy opened the door. Even with ear protection on, I jumped every time I heard someone fire. Loud was an understatement. I noticed that I was only one of three women. The other two women were much older than me. I was relieved that Billy had agreed to help us get started.
Billy gestured to an empty bay beside the older ladies, and we set our things down on the table. He showed us what to do, step-by-step. It seemed easy enough.
“Ladies first,” he shouted.
I swallowed hard and took a deep breath. I didn’t know what to expect firing a gun for the first time. Don’t completely miss the target. That would be embarrassing. I took my gun from Billy after he loaded it and stood in front of the table. My hands shook as I raised the gun in front of me.
“May I?” Billy stood behind me and placed his hands on my hips. He moved me where he wanted me to stand, setting my legs in the proper spots. He raised my arms, and I held the gun straight out in front of me. Then, he stepped away.
One. Two. Three. I pulled the trigger. Immediately, I was pushed backwards from the powerful blast, and the sound of the shot vibrated throughout my chest. I didn’t hit any of the marks in the middle of the paper, but I hit the paper nonetheless.
I set my gun down on the table and turned around. Tanner high-fived me, a grin stretched across his face.
“What do you think?” Billy asked.
“I think you need to teach me how to hit my target.”
He and Tanner laughed. “All right. Take the stance I showed you.” I watched as he placed a small red sticker on the target paper where an actual human heart would be located, and sent it back down the track. “I want you to aim for that red sticker. Take a deep breath, and when you exhale, that’s when you shoot.”
I aimed for the red dot. Inhale. Exhale. Shoot. This time, I wasn’t pushed backwards as far as before. I didn’t hit the red dot, but I did hit the fake human in his chest.
“Woo!” Tanner hooted.
“That’s the trick,” Billy said. “If you aim for something small on your target, you’ll be sure to hit somewhere close enough.”
“I just need more practice.”
“Your girl’s determined,” he said to Tanner.
Tanner just kept grinning. “Yes, she is.”
“I think you guys are good to go. Let me know if you need any more help.” Billy walked away, leaving me and Tanner alone.
“Your turn.” I set my gun down and leaned against the table, watching Tanner take his stance.
I didn’t find guns sexy, but Tanner looked sexy holding one. Then again, he would look sexy no matter what he was holding. He oozed virility. His shirt was tight in all the right places, showing off his muscular physique, and his jeans hugged his perfectly round bottom. The only bare asses I’d seen were in movies, other than my ex-boyfriend Kyle’s. Kyle’s could never compare. From what I could see, I doubted Brad Pitt’s magnificent rear could even hold a candle to Tanner’s.
“How’s the view back there?”
My cheeks grew hot, and I knew my face was as red as a tomato. “Aren’t you supposed to be focused on your target?”
“It’s kind of hard to concentrate with you checking out at my ass like that. I’m not a piece of meat, you know.”
One of the older women next to us poked her head into our bay. “Sugar, with a rear end like that, you should be used to getting ogled everywhere you go.”
I burst into laughter, and she winked at me before returning to her side of the bay.
Tanner laughed, and it was the first time I’d seen him blush. He set the gun down. “Get over here. It’s my turn to stare at your ass now.”
“Careful,” I said, gesturing with my thumb. “She might think you’re talking to her.”
We took turns shooting for the rest of our paid hour and grabbed pizza nearby afterward. Two hours later, we arrived back at my apartment.
“I’d say we could go back to my place to hang out, but my brother ruined that idea.” Tanner turned off his car and faced me in his seat.
“What do you mean?”
“I was going to move in to the apartment above our garage. My parents had it furnished for me and everything. Then, Chase decided he wanted to give it to his girlfriend instead.”
“He’s dating that girl Merritt, right?”
“Yeah, or at least he thinks he is. I’m not sure she’s interested in him … which makes me like the girl instantly.”
“Mal told me what happened to her family. She probably needs that apartment more than you do right now.”
“You sound like my mom.”
“What’s she like?”
“She’s perfect. She’s like Superwoman.”
“Most moms are.”
Tanner laced his fingers with mine. “Do you remember yours at all?”
“I have some memories of her. Only good ones. She gave the best hugs.”
“You don’t seem sad when you talk about her.”
“I’ve had a long time to grieve.”
“How did your dad handle it?”
I knew Tanner was asking because he was about to go through it himself. Normally, I didn’t like opening up about this, but right now I didn’t mind. I would stay in the car talking to him until sunrise if I knew it would help him feel even a little better.
“My dad was heartbroken. He still is.”
“And you?”
I shrugged. “I was so young, I don’t think I really processed it. I focused on cheering up my dad. We were so close.”
“Were?”
“We sort of had a falling-out since leaving Florida.”
“You didn’t want to come here, did you?”
“I didn’t really have a choice.”
“You’re eighteen. You could’ve stayed there.”
I shook my head. “I should get going. It’s late.”
Tanner leaned closer until the warmth of his breath reached my lips. “If I stop asking questions, will you stay a little longer?”
“Maybe.”
“Let me convince you, then.” He trailed kisses along my neck. His tongue swept across my skin, followed by a gentle bite that sent a charge through me.
I couldn’t move, completely paralyzed and breathless under his spell. Nobody had ever put their mouth on me like that. Then again, nobody I’d met had ever been quite like Tanner Brooks. He was intimidating and exhilarating at the same time, and I was powerless to the way he made me feel.
“Now will you stay?” he whispered as his tongue traced my ear.
“You said you wouldn’t ask any more questions.”
His laugh was low and husky as he took my earlobe between his teeth. “Smart-ass.”
Unable to take the teasing for one second longer, I grabbed the back of his head and pulled his lips onto mine. I opened my mouth, letting his tongue slide inside. Tanner let out a low growl. His kiss was so intense—so electrifying—I felt it in every nerve ending. I slipped my hands under his shirt to feel the ripples on his stomach. His skin was silk, each cube on his abdomen as if carved out of stone. I craved more of him but couldn’t get close enough with the center console between us.
“I really hate my brother right now.”
I giggled against his mouth. “She needs the apartment, even more than you do right now.”
Tanner sighed and touched his lips to my forehead. “Yeah, yeah.”
“Besides, I wouldn’t let you take me home tonight, anyway.”
>
His eyebrows lifted as he leaned back in his seat. “No?”
“Nope. The last time I gave myself to someone, he threw me away like yesterday’s trash. I won’t ever let that happen again. The next time I’m with someone, it’s going to be someone worthy of me. Someone who will treat me, and my body, like I am something special.”
“I’m glad to hear that.” He took my face in his hands, and stared straight into my eyes. “Because you deserve to be worshipped, my sweet girl, and I plan on showing you exactly what that feels like.”
As soon as the words left his mouth, I felt it. The smallest seed had been planted deep in the soil outside my heart. If I allowed it to remain there—if I let the sunshine in and watered it—it would sprout leaves and twist its vines around my fortress.
Or maybe it already had.
Nine
Tanner
“Can we watch Moana?” Khloe asked. She was jumping on my bed in zebra footy pajamas.
“Not tonight, Squirt. I have plans.”
“With who?”
“A girl named Charlotte.”
Khloe stopped jumping and bounced onto her bottom. “Who’s Charlotte?” Her big round eyes watched me in the mirror as I pulled a T-shirt over my head.
“A girl I know.”
“Where are you going with her?”
“To the movies.”
“Can I come?” She fell to the floor onto her knees and begged with her tiny hands in front of her face. “Can I, Tanner? Please?”
“Not tonight. It’s almost your bedtime.” I ruffled her hair before tossing her over my shoulder.
She squealed as I carried her into her bedroom and flipped her onto her bed.
She giggled as Mom walked into the room. “Mommy, Tanner won’t let me come to the movies with him. He’s going with a girl.”
Mom’s eyebrows shot up, but she didn’t ask me about it. “He probably won’t let you come with him because it’s your bedtime.”
“See? Told ya, Squirt.” I leaned over to kiss her on her forehead. “Good night. Sleep tight.”
“I love you, Tan-Tan,” she called.
“I love you, and I’d love you even more if you stopped calling me Tan-Tan.”
“You know she only calls you that because you can’t stand it,” Mom called as I left Khloe’s bedroom.
I winked at her before closing the door.
I trotted downstairs and slipped my wallet into my back pocket.
“Going out again?” Dad called from the living room.
“Yes, sir.” I walked over to find him on the recliner. He’d lost so much weight over the past couple months, and his sallow complexion no longer looked like the same olive color as mine. It was hard to see him like this.
“When are you going to let us meet this mystery woman of yours?” he asked with a smirk.
I smiled as I leaned down to kiss him on the top of his head. “Good night. I love you, Dad.”
“I love you, too, son.”
I knew my parents were curious about who I was spending all my free time with. The past few weeks had been spent either at the shop, or with Charlotte. Chase was bringing Merritt around a lot, and it made me want to bring Charlotte over, too.
But being around my father broke my heart, and I didn’t want to be home to witness it. Charlotte was my escape from the depressing reality of what was happening to him. When I was with her, nothing else mattered—not our past lives, and not anything we were going through in the present.
Charlotte
Tanner took me on another date. We were sitting in the back seat of his car at a drive-in movie. I didn’t even know what movie we were here to see. It didn’t matter—our eyes were closed as we made out like kids without a care in the world. His Mustang wasn’t the most comfortable place to be, but it was better than nothing.
“This is the first time I am actually regretting buying this Mustang.”
“I think this is romantic. It’s what everybody did in the fifties.”
“Oh, yeah? Is an ass cramp romantic to you?”
“It is if you’ll massage it out for me.”
“One day, I’m going to take you up on that.”
I giggled and rested my head against his shoulder. Admittedly, the more time we spent together, the more I wanted more. The physical attraction between us was growing by the day.
“We should be taking this time to get to know each other better,” Tanner said.
I raised my eyebrows. “Okay. What’s your favorite color?”
“Red. You?”
“Teal. It was my mom’s favorite. When’s your birthday?”
“May 1.”
I laughed. “Of course it is.”
“What does that mean?”
“You’re a Taurus. I could’ve guessed that one.”
“All right, smartass. When’s your birthday?”
“March 1.”
“We’re both on the first. That’s pretty cool. What does that make you?”
“Pisces.”
“So, I’m a bull and you’re a fish?”
“Yup. Two fish swimming in opposite directions.” Which was exactly how I felt most of the time.
“Okay, enough of these fluffy questions. I want to truly know you. I want to know about your life.”
“Well, you already know about my mom. After that, it was just me and my dad. Both of their parents died young, so I didn’t have any grandparents or other family members. We had a few close friends. I miss my best friend, Carla, terribly. She is the reason why I know about zodiac signs. She knows all about astrology. She swears by it.”
“Do you still talk to her?”
No, because I disappeared in the night, never to be seen or heard from again. “Sometimes.”
“Can I ask you something else?”
“Sure.” I stiffened, an uneasy feeling creeping into my stomach.
Tanner swiped and clicked on his phone a couple times and then held out his screen for me to see. “Was that your dad’s old bakery?”
Acid pooled in my stomach. The picture on Tanner’s screen showed a fiery blaze engulfing the storefront of a bakery—my bakery—as firefighters attempted to put the fire out. The headline above the picture read: “Fire Breaks Out at Family-Owned Bakery.”
“That’s it, isn’t it?”
Tears welled in my eyes, and my throat felt like it was closing. The dam I’d built to stop me from remembering that night had sprung a massive leak as the memories rushed forward. I sat, paralyzed, while the terror and guilt washed over me. Just like that, I was back in the kitchen of Dad’s old bakery …
I turned the knob on the stove. The clicking igniter sounded so loud in the silent room. It accompanied the sound of my beating heart. The flame roared to a start, and I stared into it. The red gas can felt light in my hand. I couldn’t forget to take it with me when I left.
I was doing this. There was no turning back now.
“What do you think you’re doing?” John’s voice startled me out of my thoughts. He stood in the doorway at the back of the kitchen.
He was too early. Had he been watching me?
“Stay back!” I shouted. “You can’t stop me.”
“The hell I can’t! You think you’re so smart, but you’re not smart enough, blondie!” He stomped toward me, but his fancy leather shoes slipped on the lighter fluid I’d poured all over the kitchen. His legs went up as he flew into the air, and his head bounced when it hit the tile.
I held my breath, waiting for him to get up.
But he didn’t.
“Charlotte!” Tanner was shaking me by the shoulders now. “Talk to me, baby. Please!”
I blinked a few times and touched my fingers to my cheek. I was crying. Where was I?
I turned to see Tanner sitting beside me wearing a tortured expression.
“Charlotte? Can you hear me?”
I was safe. I was with Tanner. I flung my arms around his neck and held him as tightly as I could.
“Baby, what the hell just happened? Talk to me. One second, you were sitting here talking to me, and the next …” He paused. “You were gone. It’s like you were sleepwalking.”
I tried to control my sobs, wiping my face with the back of my hand. “I … I get these sometimes.”
“These? What are these?” He held me out in front of him so he could look into my eyes. He looked so scared, and I felt awful. I’d scared him.
“I don’t know. Panic attacks, I think.”
“What are you having panic attacks about?”
I covered my face with my hands. “I can’t tell you, Tanner.”
“Why not?” He took my hands and held them inside his. “Maybe I can help you. Let me help you.”
“There’s nothing you can do. It’s over now.”
“Clearly, it’s not over. You just had a panic attack when I showed you the fire from your old bakery. Is it because of the fire? Were you trapped inside or something?”
“Tanner, enough!” I yelled louder than I’d meant to. “Please,” I begged with tears streaming down my face. “I need you to trust me when I say that I cannot tell you. I need you to accept me for who I am today. I need my past to stay in the past. I need to move forward. I need to forget.”
“And when will these panic attacks end?” he asked quietly.
“I don’t know. I don’t know what’s going to happen in the future, and I can’t change what has happened in the past. All I know is that I want to enjoy spending time with you. I want to hold you, and I want to kiss you. That’s it. If we continue, I need you to say that you can accept me this way.”
Tanner ran his fingers through my hair and drew me in until his lips brushed mine. “I accept you. I will always accept you.” He looked at me with such ferocity, I could feel how much he meant it.
I knew it was unfair to ask him for this without full disclosure, but this was the only way. He wouldn’t be able to accept my demons if he met them. I wouldn’t expect anyone to. The only way I could protect Tanner from my past was keeping him completely out of it. He was innocent.
I was not.
Ten
The Other Brother (The Collision Series) Page 9