“Do you know how many times I’ve thought about this?” she asks, licking her lips and running her hands over the rigid plain of my abs.
“About what?” I’m fucking with her and we both know it. It’s wrong, but hearing her say she was into me, her confession—although I already assumed as much—it’s a heady feeling.
“About this.” She takes her time letting her hands roam. “I’d watch you in the gym or when we took the boat out on the lake. There are so many instances when I wished that you were mine so I could touch you like this.”
“Your wish is granted,” I say, leaning back on the bed, supporting my weight with my hands. “Do with me as you wish.”
She gives me a devilish smile and her fingers move to the waistband of my shorts. She’s quick to get them unbuttoned and pull down the zipper. “Anything I want?” she asks, pretending to be pondering her next move.
“Vixen.” I huff the word when her hand slides under the band of my boxer briefs and she cups me in her hand.
“Wow,” she says, her eyes watching her hand inside my underwear.
“As much as your wow pleases me, we need to stop this.” I pull on her hands and they slide free.
“Hey, I wasn’t done.” She pouts, sticking out her bottom lip. Leaning in, I nip at it with my teeth.
“I know that, but damn it, Gabby. I’m not blowing in your hand.” I stand and she takes a step back. My shorts fall to the floor, and with a tug, my boxer briefs slide easily down my legs. “My turn.” I reach for her shorts and have them down her legs in no time. She stands before me in a pair of white cotton panties and a matching white cotton bra.
“I didn’t expect this,” she says as if she needs to explain something to me. “These are… comfortable,” she rushes to defend.
“They’re sexy as fuck.”
She rolls her eyes. “Come on, Chase. I know this isn’t what you’re used to.”
“Hey.” I pull her body close to mine, feeling her skin and the thin pieces of cotton rub against me. “We talked about this. It’s been a long-ass time since there’s been anyone. Believe me when I tell you these are sexy.” I run my hand over the globes of her ass as reassurance. “Gabs, you could be in a paper sack and my cock would still be hard as steel for you. It’s not what you’re wearing. It’s you.”
“Just me, huh?” She smiles. Reaching behind her back, she unfastens her bra. I watch every move as she slides one strap and then the other down her shoulders.
“Fuck,” I murmur when she drops the white cotton to the floor. Her breasts are perfect, just as I imagined them to be. My hand darts out to cup them in my palm, testing their weight. When my thumb caresses her pebbled nub, a throaty moan escapes her. Needing more of her, I stretch to pull a nipple into my mouth, lavishing it with my tongue while fondling the other between my fingers. Gabby sags against me, and I drop my hands to wrap my arms around her, pulling her closer.
My lips trail across her chest, down her belly. When my hand slips under the waistband of her panties, she shuffles her feet. And when I find her wet for me, she sucks in a breath. I ache to feel her, all of her. I need her naked. Removing my hand, I smile as she grunts her complaint, but I continue on. Gripping the sides of the white cotton, I push them over her hips and down her thighs.
“This is torture,” she says, stepping out of her panties.
I can’t help but chuckle. “I’m not torturing. I’m savoring.”
“Can you savor a little faster?” she asks.
“Oh, baby, I’m just getting started.” With my hands on her hips, I lift her, stand, and then toss her gently on the bed. Reaching into the nightstand, I pull out the unopened box of condoms I bought the first night she stayed here. Call it wishful thinking. Grabbing a strip, I toss it near the pillow and walk to the end of the bed.
She’s sprawled out on the mattress, bare and inviting, and it’s all for me. Crawling on the bed, I don’t stop until I’m settled between her thighs. Immediately, I nibble her inner thigh.
“Chase.” My name is a breath from her lips.
“Hmm,” I say, but not before my mouth covers her clit. The vibration has her back arching off the bed.
“More.”
“More of what, Gabs?”
“You. Everything. Just… more.”
“Done,” I say, and fuse my mouth to her pussy like I’m a starving man. In a way, that’s exactly what I am. Starved of her, deprived of her taste for so long, I don’t know that I’ll ever be able to pull myself away from her. Her hands dig into my hair, and her legs clamp around my neck as she loses control.
“Yo-You’re trying to kill me,” she pants, loosening her legs from around my neck. I pull my mouth from her and wipe my face with the back of my hand.
“Never,” I say, reaching for the condoms and kneeling. With hooded eyes, she lifts her head and watches me roll the condom on. Without a word, I hover over her, resting my hand on either side of her head. She reaches between us and guides me inside. Gabby’s eyes flutter closed, her long lashes kissing her cheeks. “Open your eyes, Gabby.” I slowly pump my hips as I wait for her. When she finally forces her eyes open, what I see there hits me right in the chest.
Love.
She’s looking at me like she loves me, and damn if that doesn’t fuel my desire. “I want your eyes on me when you scream out my name.” She nods and I unleash. I’ve wanted her for so long. Wanted to be wrapped in her warmth, her in my arms, and to just… be. Over and over, I slide home. That’s exactly what she is. Home. I’ll make damn sure that this is our future.
Her nails dig into my back, and her pussy grows tight around my cock. “Do-Don’t stop,” she pants as her eyes flutter.
“Eyes on me, baby.” I need to see that look. I need it because I know I can’t tell her what she means to me, not yet. Not while I’m buried balls deep inside her. It’s too soon, and I’m scared as hell she’s going to run once reality hits. Well, she might try. I’m not letting her go.
Not again.
Not ever.
I’ve stayed away as long as I could. I can’t resist her, and now that I’ve been inside her, there’s no going back.
“There!” She gasps the word.
Her nails dig deeper, and I love the feel of her losing control because of me. I thrust once, twice, three more times and she’s calling out my name. Her hooded eyes never leave mine as I find my release. It takes me a minute to catch my breath, so I rest my forehead against hers. When I start to pull away, she stops me.
“Don’t go.”
“I have to take care of the condom. I’ll be right back,” I assure her. I miss her heat immediately as I climb off the bed and rush to the bathroom to handle my business. I wet a washcloth with warm water and take it to Gabby. “Open for me.” She does so without question as I take care of her.
“No one’s ever done that before,” she says as I toss the cloth into a clothes basket and crawl back in bed, pulling her into my arms.
“First of all, anyone else you’ve been with was an asshole and not taking care of you. Second, this is the last time we discuss anyone else being… there.”
“There?” She laughs. “Can you not say it?”
“This is the last time we discuss anyone being near or inside your pussy but me.” I kiss her lips. “Better?”
Her face is flushed. “Why is it when I say it, it sounds crude? But when you say it, I’m all worked up. It’s sexy.”
“Yeah? I think you should say it so I can judge for myself.”
“What? No.” She laughs.
“Come on, it’s just me.”
“It’s… crude.”
“You just said it was sexy,” I counter.
“Only when you say it.”
I bend my lips to her ear. “I love the taste of your pussy,” I purr, and she squirms. “Your turn.”
“I don’t… no.” She sniggers.
“Come on. Just say it one time for me.”
“I don’t know what to say.”
“Just the word. Come on. You can do it,” I tease. My hand travels over her hip and slides between her thighs. I run my fingers through her, lazily exploring. “Where are my fingers, Gabby?”
“Chase,” she groans, covering her face with her hands.
“Tell me. Where are my hands?”
Her hands fall from her face and I can see the determination set. That’s one of the things I love about her. She’s fierce and not afraid to speak her mind. Then again, maybe that was just with me. “My pussy,” she whispers huskily.
My cock twitches against her leg and her eyes widen. “That’s all you, sweetheart.”
“Just from one word?”
“No. Not just one word. Just you being you. Being here in my arms, talking all dirty and shit.” I lose the battle with my laughter.
“Hush.” Gabby playfully smacks my shoulder.
“I’m sorry. I couldn’t resist,” I say, kissing the corner of her mouth. “Any regrets?” I ask, pulling away from her. I hold her tight just in case she tries to run.
“None.”
“We’re doing this, right, Gabs. You and me. No hiding we’re together.”
“We’re together,” she confirms.
“I’m probably going to fuck up, and more than likely piss you off, but you’re going to stay, right? Give me a chance to get used to being a couple. It’s been a hell of a long time for me, but I want this with you. More than I’ve ever wanted anything.”
“I know we’ve fought a lot, and I’ve said some pretty nasty things, we both have.” I nod my agreement. “However, things have changed between us. It all feels different now.”
“That’s because it’s better. There is nothing that could be better than lying naked with you in my arms after an earth-moving orgasm.”
“Earth-moving? Meh, I’d say more thunderstorm,” she says, barely containing her laughter.
“Woman, I’ll show you thunderstorm.” I roll on top of her just as the doorbell rings. “What the hell?” I look over at the clock and it’s nearing eleven at night.
“Expecting someone?” she asks.
“No.”
“Maybe it’s one of—” I give her a look that stops her from finishing. “Sorry. Habit.” She blushes.
The doorbell rings again. “Fuck. Don’t move. I’ll be right back to pick up where we left off.” I kiss her once more, just a quick peck on the lips before climbing out of bed and pulling on some basketball shorts, I rush down the stairs, and toward the front door.
Turning on the front porch light, I pull open the door, but there’s no one there, at least not until I look down and see a baby seat, a bit like the one Sophia has. “What the fuck?” I mutter, looking around. That’s when a car parked just down the street turns on its lights and squealing tires drive away from my house.
“Chase?” Gabby says from behind me. I feel her hand on my back. “Who is it?”
“It’s uh—” Fuck, I don’t know what the hell is going on. I step back and wait for her eyes to drop to the baby. “A baby. I think,” I admit.
“Did you see anyone?” she asks.
“No, but a car just turned on its lights and sped away.”
She steps around me and lifts the seat. “Grab the diaper bag,” she says, moving into the house. Doing as she says, I grab the bag, take one more look around outside before closing and locking the door behind me. “There’s a note,” she says, handing me an envelope with my name on it.
Taking the envelope, I open it and I’m only a few sentences in and my heart is beating so loud in my chest, I can’t seem to focus on the rest. This can’t be right. I don’t know what’s happening. Forcing myself to focus, I read the rest of the letter before crumpling it up in my fist. I don’t know a Laura Matthews. Fuck, this cannot be happening.
All I can think is that I’m going to lose her. I just got her, and we’re in a good place and I’m going to lose her. My world spins.
“Chase, sit down,” Gabby says. I do as she says. “What did it say?”
I shake my head. I’m not ready to tell her. I just want to rewind to five minutes ago when she was mine, and we were moving forward.
“Chase?” Gabby asks.
I look over at her to see her holding the baby in her arms. “What did it say?”
I can’t speak, and I know I can’t put off the inevitable. So I hand her the letter, bow my head, and hold my breath for the moment she walks out of my life.
Chapter 9
Gabby
There’s a tremble in my hand as I take the letter from him. The baby sleeps in the crook
of my arm, barely stirring when I picked him up from the infant seat. My eyes
scan the delicate penmanship on basic notebook paper. I walk over and have a seat on the couch, adjusting the tiny one so I can read the words.
Dear Chase,
I know you probably don’t remember me, but we met a little over
nine months ago at a club in St. Louis. You were there with your
brother, and I was with my friend. We hung out and then spent
the night together in your hotel room, but I left before you woke.
Well, that night resulted in a son. His name is Milo and he’s three
weeks old. I never wanted to be a mother, though I have tried. I’m
just not wired that way, and that’s why I’m leaving him with you.
You can give him the life he deserves. I’ll call you soon to work out custody, but I won’t fight you for him. He’s your son. If you don’t
want to raise him, we can put him up for adoption, but honestly, I
hope you have it in you to care for him. He needs one decent parent
in his life.
I’ll be in touch.
Laura Matthews
My eyes fly to his. There’s a mix of fear and shock there as his eyes bounce from me to the sleeping baby in my arms. His baby.
“Chase?” I ask, my voice soft and direct.
He jumps up and starts pacing the living room. When he reaches the wall, he turns and makes his way to the other side. The entire time, his hands are running through his hair, much like my own hands were not a half hour earlier. Only this time, it’s a sign of his disbelief.
After two or three laps across the room, he finally stops and glances down at the baby. “I was in St. Louis,” he whispers quietly, not taking his eyes off the tiny human. “Colton was home on leave for a few days so I went to the city. We met up on Saturday morning, hung out, and went to a ballgame. After, we found a club to celebrate the Cards’ victory and Colton’s last few days stateside. There was booze.” He closes his eyes as if going back to that night and shakes his head.
When he looks back down, there’s a resolve shining brightly in his eyes. Defeat.
Chase drops on the loveseat and runs his hands through his hair once more. “I don’t remember a lot of the night, but I know I woke up in my hotel room, alone. I was naked, but after a night of drinking, I would often strip and pass out in bed.”
My chest aches for him, for the baby in my arms.
“The next morning, Colton was so fucking hungover. He couldn’t remember much after we had a few shots, and shit, there were a lot of shots. He definitely couldn’t hold his liquor the way he used to. I know there was some dancing, and a couple of blondes who latched on to us early in the night. They seemed to make themselves comfy at our table, but we didn’t mind much, especially Colton. He was anxious to really let loose before he was sent off to some godforsaken country.”
I glance down at the baby boy in my arms, not really sure how to feel about this entire situation. On the one hand, Chase and I just made love after he vowed I was the only one for quite some time. Apparently, quite some time is only about ten months. But on the other hand, when I look at the precious baby in my arms, the one whose mother literally just dropped him off at our doorstep with a stranger (granted, his father, but a stranger nonetheless), and I feel… adoration.
“C
hase?” I whisper, causing him to look up from across the room, the panic evident in his gorgeous eyes. “It’s going to be okay.”
“I don’t know what to do.” The words are barely audible, his hands rest on the top of his head and his eyes are wide with fear.
I stand up and walk his way. “You’re going to go get a couple of blankets ready to make a little bed. I’m going to change his diaper and then make a bottle made, since I’m not sure when the last time he ate was. I’ll bring him to you.”
“Me?”
“Yes, you,” I state with a bravado I have no idea where it comes from.
“Don’t leave.” His words a soft plea, his eyes begging as he reaches forward and swipes a strand of messy hair from my forehead.
“I’m not going anywhere.” He doesn’t look convinced, so I add, “I promise. We’ll figure this out. Together.”
Chase seems to visibly release some of the tension he was holding in his shoulders. “Okay, yeah, a bed area, I can do that.”
I nod encouragingly. “We’ll put it in the middle of your bed for now, okay? He can sleep between us.”
I’m rewarded with a boyish grin, one filled with relief and exhaustion. “I like that,” he replies, stepping forward and pulling me into his arms. They wrap loosely around me, careful not to stir the baby, as he places a warm kiss on my forehead. “Thank you.”
“Tomorrow we’ll try to track her down, okay? For tonight, let’s just try to get some sleep. I remember Gwen saying they slept when Sophia slept,” I add, almost absently to myself. I’m making a mental checklist of all the things we need to do, baby items we need to buy.
But we can’t do that right now.
Right now, it’s nearing midnight, and the only thing we can do is try to get some sleep, and hopefully, figure out more about Milo and his mother in the morning. Pushing the thought of Chase and Laura together in St. Louis out of my mind, I set out to gather as much as I can from the diaper bag and prepare for bed. Fortunately, Laura thought to stuff as much as she could get into the bag. Diapers, formula, burp cloths, and outfits. Not enough to last very long, but enough to get us by for a few days without having to go shopping.
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