And if they are safe. However, Josie did not give voice to the thought she suspected the others harbored as well.
Please, Lord, send Clinton home soon. Safe. She ached with missing him, and Aunt Joyce had commented on her lack of appetite recently. She had never imagined it would be as hard as it had been. But, she told herself, each passing day brought him that much closer to home.
Lydia lingered for a good part of the afternoon, and the three girls socialized, though, without the men in town, there wasn’t much to talk about. The magazine Millie had gotten weeks before had been read, re-read, and triple read, the pages nearly worn from flipping back and forth.
“Well,” Lydia said as the three friends stood around the counter of the general store, “how are your wedding plans coming along, Josie? Is your dress finished?”
Josie looked away briefly before replying. “I thought that missing Clinton would be a good motivation to work on my dress, but lately it seems like I am just too sad and lonely to do anything. At least with the dresses I’ve been hired to make, I have a deadline, and that keeps me going, not to mention the money, but at the end of the day, I…I am just so lonely.”
A tiny tear trickled down her cheek, and the others looked at her with compassion. No doubt they had worries of their own.
They stood in silence for a moment until a commotion on the street caught their attention. Millie was the first to the door to learn what was happening. Josie looked out the window and saw a number of people rushing to the north on Main Street. Oh dear. What if there was a fire? She got up and joined Millie. Lydia did, too.
“Hey!” Millie shouted at a boy rushing by. “Where is everyone going?”
He paused for a moment to answer. “The men are almost back at the Windy River Ranch. A rider came ahead to spread the word.”
There was stunned silence followed by chaos as the boy’s words sank in to the three women. They hugged and squealed and jumped up and down and then started talking all at once.
“Oh, I have to rush home and put on my new dress,” Lydia said. “Mr. Connor has promised a dance the night they return, and I am not going to miss it.” She picked up the goods she’d bought and rushed for home. “See you at Windy River,” she called over her shoulder.
Millie and Josie both scurried for the back stairs before they realized one of them would need to mind the store while the other got dressed. “You go on ahead,” she told Millie. “You don’t want to give another girl a chance to steal Travis’ attention.”
“But what about Clinton?”
“I know Clinton. He won’t look at another girl. Now, go on and hurry.”
Millie flew up the stairs and just as quickly returned wearing the new dress Josie had made for her. It was meant to be a Christmas gift, but she’d given it to her early. She bounced on the balls of her feet as she spoke. “Okay, now you go and get ready, and I’ll mind the store and then we’ll both be on our way.”
Millie’s eyes were wild, and she kept glancing toward the window as more and more people hurried by. Whether they had a loved one returning from the cattle drive or not, nobody wanted to miss the festivities.
Just then Uncle Carl returned. “I hear the men are going to be back at Windy River soon.” He glanced from Millie to Josie. “I see Millie is ready, but what about you, Josie? Have you decided you don’t need to look your best for Clinton anymore?” He had a teasing glint in his eye.
“Uncle Carl! Of course not. It’s just that I was watching the store while Millie got ready, but now that you are here, I’ll go and get changed, if you don’t mind.”
“Far be it for me to stand in the way of young love,” Uncle Carl said.
“Well, hurry up, Josie.” Millie continued bouncing up and down.
Though eager to see Clinton and be in his arms, feel his kisses, Josie did not wish to rush. “Millie, you go on. I’ll meet up with you there.”
“Are you sure?” Millie asked, three steps toward the door.
Josie hurried down the nearly empty street toward Windy River Ranch. She’d had the worst time trying to decide what to wear. Maybe she should have made a dress for herself like she had for Lydia and Millie, so at least she’d know what to put on.
After a couple of changes and three attempts at styling her hair, she ran out the door and down the street, kicking herself for not being faster. What if Clinton was waiting for her? After waiting and waiting for him, she was late when he finally returned. What sort of wife acted that way?
The boy had said the men from the drive were to be returning soon, not that they had already arrived, so she told herself she still had time, though she moved as fast as she could.
When she got to the edge of town, she could see and hear the crowd that had gathered at Windy River Ranch. There was a big bonfire started, and she could hear voices and music.
As soon as she arrived, she looked through the crowd but it seemed none of the men were back yet. Millie and Lydia waved to her and she joined them in their anxious vigil, staring toward the horizon. Millie patted her hair and rose on tiptoe to get a better view.
“Oh, I think I see them!” She moved in that direction as others did as well. In fact, the entire crowd shifted that way en masse, carrying Josie and the others along with them. A few people were pushing, and Josie feared falling and being trampled. Separated from Lydia and Millie as the throng rushed along, she managed to reach the edge of the group and stepped out of the mob that seemed to have taken on a life of its own.
Saying a silent prayer that no one got hurt, she waited by the corral until the stampede of people passed. As much as she longed to see Clinton, her sense of self-preservation won out.
She gathered herself and, in just a few minutes, was able to hurry along and meet up with the others.
The crowd was absolutely chaotic with shouts and whoops, and people of all ages cheering and waving.
Clinton. Clinton was here, and all she had to do was find him. She dove into the crowd again, determined to locate her fiancé.
Chapter 5
Excitement crackled in the air and Josie’s heart pounded as she rushed around, searching for Clinton’s handsome face. Would he be different? More worldly? Surely, visiting a place like Monroe City would have opened his eyes to many new things. New ideas.
Would Juniper Junction still hold any appeal for him?
As far as she could tell, all the other men were thrilled to be home. Travis and Millie were deep in conversation, Millie’s face bright with happiness. Travis was a good man, Clinton’s best friend, and he and Millie were perfect for each other. Now, she hoped Travis had realized that, too.
She continued through the crowd, though people were breaking off into small groups once loved ones had located their returning travelers.
Surely Clinton would be easy to spot now that the throng had disbursed. When she got all the way to the far side of the group and didn’t find him, her heart started pounding even faster. Where could he be? Surely he was looking for her, too? Why hadn’t he come up behind her and picked her up and swung her around the way she’d seen Rafe do with Lydia? Beautiful new dress or not, it was clear Rafe had missed her. Seeing all the joyful reunions only made her more anxious to find Clinton.
Forcing herself to remain calm, she passed through the group one more time, peering in every direction, listening for the familiar timbre of his voice.
Nothing.
Oh mercy! Where could he be? Her mind flashed back to the story of Shirley Ryan. Had her fella run off on her, too?
No, of course not. Clinton was true blue, as was his love for her. Maybe he was helping with the horses or something.
Taking a deep breath, she forced herself to calm down. It wouldn’t do any good for Clinton to find her in a state of panic.
A tap on her shoulder sent her pulse soaring. Joyfully she turned, arms wide, waiting for his embrace.
She froze in place, arms dropped to her sides. “Oh, Mr. Connor,” she said, peering up into the fac
e of Clinton’s employer. “I-I thought you were someone else.”
Why was Mr. Connor seeking her out? Fear prickled along her skin. Had something happened to Clinton? Cold terror ran through her, but she forced herself to speak rationally. No reason to make the richest man in the county think she was an idiot. “Wh-what can I do for you, sir?”
HIs face was solemn, and tears stung at the corners of her eyes. He took his hat off and held it over his chest, and she nearly fainted. “It’s about Clinton,” he said, his voice deep and rich, though it made her blood run cold. “He didn’t come back with us.”
“Wh-wha?” She couldn’t even get a full word out. Her knees slammed together, and her hand quaked. As she stared up at Mr Connor, all she could think about was that time years ago when the trail leader had come to tell her both her parents had died. He had the same pitiful expression on his face as he gripped his hat in his hands and told her the bad news.
Had something actually happened to Clinton? How could that be possible? He was so strong and healthy and young. He was only nineteen years old.
“Did you at least give him a decent burial?” she asked, barely able to get the words out, glancing around at the festivities happening and wanting to scream at everyone who was having a good time while her world was falling apart. How dare they laugh and dance when her Clinton was gone? Fearing she might faint, she reached out and grabbed Mr. Connor’s arm to steady herself.
“Oh,” Mr. Connor said with a chuckle. She stared up at him, slack-jawed at such a rude response to her question.
“I beg your pardon, Miss Josie,” Mr. Connor said. “This ain’t no laughing matter. I guess I should have done a better job of explaining myself. Clinton is alive and well, just simply hired on to another drive while we were in the city, and he won’t be back for a few more weeks.”
Josie took a step back, not sure whether to jump for joy at knowing Clinton was alive and well or to punch something at the realization it would be weeks before he came home. He sure had nerve. And to make matters worse, the story about Miss Ryan and her runaway fiancé leapt to the forefront of her brain.
“What are you talking about?” Josie asked. “Why would he hire on to another drive instead of coming back here? Back to m-me?”
“We met up with another rancher in Monroe City, and he was desperate for some hands. He was offering top dollar, too. A few of the other fellows considered it, but Clinton was the only one who took him up on the offer. I understand he’s hoping to buy a house in town, and I know you two are getting married soon. I think he just wanted to make as much money as he could so you’d have a nice nest egg. ’Course, it’s none of my business, and I shouldn’t be speculating, but I know he wants to get back to you as soon as he can.”
Mr. Connor reached inside his jacket, pulled out an envelope, and handed it to her. “Clinton asked me to give this to you. I’m sure he’ll explain everything better than I’ve done. Now, don’t you worry none. Clinton’s the best cowboy I know and an outstanding horseman. He’s got a good head on his shoulders. He’ll be back here before you know it, full of sass and vinegar just like always.”
He put his hat back on and touched the brim. “I truly do apologize, Miss Josie, for the poor way I conveyed this information. I’m sure I gave you quite a fright, and, for that, I am sincerely sorry. I want you to take a few minutes to read over Clinton’s letter and then come on back to the party. I’m sure Clinton wouldn’t mind if I had one dance with his intended while he’s away.”
Dazed, Josie just nodded as Mr. Connor returned to the party. With trembling fingers, she opened the letter from Clinton.
My dearest Josie,
If you are reading this, then that means Mr. Connor has let you know I have signed on for an additional drive. Mr. Gibson, the rancher whose cattle need to be taken to the market, is a real decent man who has a large spread, and he’s promised me a more-than -decent wage for my efforts.
I’m real sorry because I know you are as eager to see me as much as I am to see you. I missed you so much while I was out on the trail, and I know that missing is going to continue for a few more weeks. But I promise when I get back we’ll have a nice little nest egg for that house and so we can start a family.
Now, you behave yourself while I’m gone. We’ll both stay busy so the time will pass as quickly as possible. Don’t you worry, Josie, I’m going to marry you just like I promised. Don’t you ever forget it.
All my love,
Clinton
She read the whole letter one more time and then for a third time before folding it up and putting it back in the envelope and heading for home. Her heart was heavy, and though she could see everybody else dancing and enjoying themselves, celebrating the successful return of the men from the cattle drive, Josie just couldn’t do it. From a distance, she watched for a moment as all the young couples enjoyed being together once again.
She stomped her foot, angry tears threatening at the corners of her eyes. She didn’t care about a stupid house or a nest egg. She wanted Clinton to come home, and she wanted him to be there now. She imagined her friends Millie and Lydia as well as Travis and Rafe dancing and laughing. Enjoying themselves flirting and planning their future. All she had to go home to was an empty room and a half-sewed wedding dress. She trudged toward town, dragging her feet, shoulders hunched, lost in misery. She just needed time alone to cry the tears and feel sorry for herself. After missing Clinton so much, she’d gotten herself worked into such a state expecting him home, and, now, the deep disappointment was almost too much for her. She ought to be grateful he was such a hard worker and wanted to do so much in order to secure their future. But, in that moment, all she wanted was to feel his strong arms around her.
Without thinking, she continued toward town and somehow managed to find herself standing in front of the house she and Clinton wanted to buy. In the moonlight, it was even more charming than in daylight, at least as far as she was concerned. It wasn’t the grandest house in town, but she could see herself very happy and content there as long as she was with Clinton. And maybe one day little babies to make their family complete.
All of that was well and good, but when Josie got home, she threw herself across her bed and had a good cry. A feet-kicking, pillow-punching bawl. Fortunately, the rest of the household was at the big party, and there was no one around to see or hear her lose her composure.
In Juniper Junction, in fact in all the West, women were expected to be strong and capable. Life was hard and required a strong constitution. There wasn’t time or energy to spare for pity parties, as Aunt Joyce had made clear to Josie and Millie numerous times over the years. And, generally speaking, Josie agreed. She’d sure had her share of hardship, and she’d worked hard to do her part for her new family.
But damnit. She wanted her man.
Chapter 6
Three months until Christmas
The general store was the busiest Josie had ever seen it. Aunt Joyce and Uncle Carl rushed from customer to customer, as did Millie. Josie helped when she could, but once the women of Juniper Junction saw the dresses she’d made for Lydia and Millie, everyone wanted one of her creations.
It was all happy news since the men had returned from the cattle drive...all but Clinton, she reminded herself, doing her best not to allow the seed of sadness and bitterness to take root too deeply. Anyway, the men had brought much needed cash to Juniper Junction. In addition, absence had indeed made the heart grow fonder, and, in the time since the party at Windy River Ranch, there had been a boom in proposals.
Usually a girl wore her best dress on her wedding day. People in the West were practical, and the idea of having a fancy gown for a wedding and then never wearing it again was the height of extravagance. Josie was making herself a new dress, a labor of love, or so she hoped, using her needle skills to make a special dress in white, no less. The most recent fashion magazines to arrive in Juniper Junction had announced the advent of white wedding dresses as the latest trend. Ap
parently, this trend had begun in England with Queen Victoria and had finally worked its way across the Atlantic to America and then all the way across the barren continent to Juniper Junction, Wyoming.
Even with all that, Josie had every intention of dying her dress a more practical blue once it had served its purpose on her wedding day.
She glanced up at the calendar. Surely Clinton would return soon. Or at least send a letter.
Seated in a corner of the store, close to the fabric and sewing notions, Josie got back to work, her fingers deft with the needle as she added tucks to the sleeves of a dress. Aunt Joyce bustled by. Though all the members of the family dropped into bed each night exhausted, spirits were high. With the influx of money and engagements, business at the general store had never been better.
Adding to their happiness—Travis had finally popped the question, and he and Millie were betrothed. Millie practically floated through the store, her joy apparent to all.
Yes, everything was perfect. Or would be, if only Clinton were there. She fought against sadness more and more with each passing day. Why hadn’t she heard from him? She knew he was out on the plains herding cows and might not have time to write letters or, even if he did, it was not like he was going to be passing a post office on a regular basis. Yes, she knew all of that in her head, but in her heart, she fought against the inklings of worry and doubt that crept in, particularly late at night.
She was glad the store was busy. For one thing, it was of benefit to the aunt and uncle who had taken her in so generously and provided for her without even a hint of complaint or concern about the added burden of another mouth to feed or a body to clothe. But, right now, she was particularly grateful for the store’s increased business—as well as her dressmaking—because she tended to fall asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow. Her dreams weren’t always pleasant, and she’d woken more than once during the middle of the night after a nightmare about Clinton being injured on the trail...or worse. She’d bolt upright in bed, her heart pounding and her palms sweating and then have to try to get back to sleep without disturbing Millie. It wasn’t always easy, but fatigue helped.
Once Upon a Christmas Wedding Page 237