The Edge of Nowhere

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The Edge of Nowhere Page 6

by C. H. Armstrong


  “I can live with that. I’ve loved once before. I’d be a very lucky man to be loved a second time, so I neither seek it nor expect it. No, I believe we’d complement each other well, and that our partnership would be very beneficial for us both. So what d’ya say, Victoria? Marry me.”

  “Mr. Harr—”

  “Will. Whether ya marry me or not, we’ve shared too much today to continue with formalities. Now, give me the answer I want. Marry me, Victoria.”

  “Will,” I said. “I don’t know. I need some time to think. As I said, we barely know each other. I don’t know anything about your children, aside from their ages and genders. Really, I know nothin’ about you. I’ll need time to consider.”

  “Very well, then.” Will nodded. “I’ll be back in town in about two weeks to get ready for harvest. I’ll call on ya then. In the meantime, I want ya to think about all I’ve said. Will ya do that?”

  I nodded. “Of course. But I can’t make ya any promises.”

  Satisfied, Will stood and extended his hand to help me stand beside him. With a smile, he said, “Two weeks, then.”

  With those final words, we strolled back toward my home, once again walking in silence. When we arrived, Will stopped and turned me toward him. Staring into my eyes, he lifted my chin with his forefinger until it was impossible for me to look away. “I’ll be back, Victoria. Two weeks, and I’ll expect a yes.” Then, without permission, he leaned down and placed a chaste kiss upon my lips.

  Staring and dumbfounded, I watched him walk away without a backward glance.

  CHAPTER TEN

  Mr. Harrison’s visit left me confused and anxious. I’d never planned to marry, yet I was seriously considering his proposal. Was it possible to marry without love?

  I opened the front door and looked around for Mother Elizabeth. I found her in the kitchen, completing preparations for our evening meal. On the kitchen table, neatly arranged in a glass vase, were the flowers Will had given me. Mother Elizabeth had trimmed the stems, allowing water to move freely through the stalks.

  “Victoria, you’re back.” She smiled.

  “Yes.” I sat at one end of the table, hoping she would join me. “Thank you for arrangin’ the flowers. They look beautiful.”

  “You’re very welcome. I was surprised to see Mr. Harrison come for a visit. You must’ve made quite an impression on him at the weddin’.”

  “It would seem that way.”

  Mother Elizabeth studied me, then removed her apron. Reaching out, she collected my hands into her own and took a seat across from me. “Ya seem upset.”

  “Not upset, exactly.” I shook my head. “Confused is a better word.”

  “Did Mr. Harrison say somethin’ inappropriate, Victoria?”

  “No. Not inappropriate, exactly. Just surprisin’.”

  Mother Elizabeth smiled. “Would ya like to tell me? Maybe I can help.” I was torn with indecision. It seemed like something too personal to share until I’d made a decision, but I knew Mother Elizabeth wouldn’t judge. Coming to a decision, I said, “He asked me to marry him.”

  Never one to easily mask her thoughts, Mother Elizabeth’s face lit up with excitement, and I erupted in a burst of unexpected giggles.

  “Well, Victoria! That’s—that’s certainly a surprise,” she said. “I’d known you’d danced together at the reception, but I wasn’t aware you’d spent so much time together that afternoon to become so well acquainted.”

  “We didn’t actually. We spoke for several minutes before we danced, then for several minutes afterward; but I can’t honestly say we became well-acquainted.”

  “But he’s asked ya to marry him. Did ya give him an answer?”

  “No—I didn’t know what to say. I asked for time to think on it, and he said he’d call again in two weeks. But I know he’s expectin’ me to say yes.”

  “And how d’ya feel about that?”

  “I’d sworn never to marry,” I admitted.

  Mother Elizabeth’s eyes widened. “What d’ya mean you’d sworn never to marry?”

  I looked away, unable to explain once again in the same day. “What should I say to him?”

  Choosing not to push the subject, Mother Elizabeth drew in a deep breath. “Well, I s’pose it depends on how ya feel. D’ya love him?”

  I shook my head. “No. But I don’t love anyone, and I don’t expect I ever will. I can’t. It’s not in me. It’s not who I am.”

  “Oh, Victoria.” Mother Elizabeth frowned. “Whatever gave ya that idea? You’re the most loving young woman I know. You’ve loved Father Caleb and me well these last ten years, and I know ya love Julianne and Jacob. You love the children ya teach at church every week. I can tell.”

  “Those are a different kind of love. I’m talkin’ about the love between a wife and husband. That I can’t do. I just won’t.”

  “I see. Does Mr. Harrison know this?”

  “He does.” I nodded.

  “And he still wants to marry ya?”

  “He says he does.”

  “How d’ya feel about that? Are ya tempted to agree?”

  “I don’t know!” A headache was forming behind my eyes, so I squeezed the bridge of my nose between two fingers to offset the pain. “I thought I knew what I wanted. I thought I knew I’d say no, but he made it sound so easy—like it’d be some sort of cure-all.”

  “I see,” she said again.

  Mother Elizabeth and I sat for a long time, neither of us speaking. Finding my words, I said, “He said he likes my strength and my spirit. He said I’d be a good example for his daughters.”

  “Well, Victoria, all I can say is that we’ve known Mr. Harrison for years, and he’s a good man. He comes from a good and well-respected family. His mother’s a challenge, but whose isn’t? I’ve known his brother, Atticus, since we were children. They’re all good people.”

  “He said his farm is about a mile from Julianne. If I married him, I’d be close enough to visit her regularly.”

  She nodded. “Yes. I believe his folks live about a mile or so in the other direction with his brother and sister-in-law, Veronica. I think I’d heard Old Man Harrison claimed the land in the original Land Run of ’89 then divided it for the two boys when they married. He and Old Mrs. Harrison lived with your younger Mr. Harrison for a while until he married. Rumor was your Mr. Harrison’s wife and his mother were unable to live under the same roof. It was quite the story when Old Man Harrison and his wife moved down the road to live with Atticus and Veronica.”

  “D’ya know anything about his children?” I asked.

  “Not much.” She shook her head. “The boys are typical boys; always looking for mischief, but good boys overall. The girls, as I recall, are pretty little things. Somewhat timid, though, if memory serves.”

  We sat in silence for several minutes, each of us mulling over the situation and the information she’d given me. Finally, Mother Elizabeth stood and swiped invisible crumbs from the table. “Well, Victoria, it seems ya have a lot to consider in these next two weeks. I’m here, if ya wanna talk; but I can’t make your decision for ya. Just know I’m always here, and I love you. You’ll make the right decision, I feel certain.”

  Standing, I gathered the vase of flowers in my arms and carried them to my bedroom. I had a great deal of thinking to accomplish, and not nearly enough time to get it done.

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  THE FOLLOWING WEEKS FLEW BY, AND MY two-week reprieve was almost at an end. We still hadn’t seen Julianne and Mr. Sykes. Mother Elizabeth decided we’d give it two more weeks, then we’d make the trip out to see them. She’d been patient enough, she declared. She needed to see her daughter was in good health.

  As the second week passed, the black-eyed Susans died and the petals fell off, scattering onto the dresser and down to the floor. Somehow I couldn’t make myself throw them out. Instead, I collected the delicate petals, placed them within a folded sheet of waxed paper, closed them within the deep confines of Mama’s B
ible, and buried them in the back of my wardrobe next to Mama’s woolen cloak.

  True to his word, Will Harrison returned exactly two weeks after his first visit on a beautiful Saturday afternoon in May. Mother Elizabeth and I were sewing curtains to replace the time-worn ones hanging in the kitchen when we were startled by a knock on the door. Mother Elizabeth’s eyes met mine, and I held my breath as she excused herself to answer the door. Moments later, she returned.

  “Victoria,” she said softly. “Mr. Harrison is here to call on ya.”

  I sat there, dazed for a moment. The time had come for me to announce my decision. In my mind, I knew what I’d decided; but I wasn’t sure I’d be able to follow through with the decision I’d made.

  Rising from behind the sewing machine, I smoothed the wrinkles from my skirt and moved toward the sitting room where Will awaited my arrival.

  “Miss Hastings.” Will stood in the foyer and assessed me. “Ya look lovely.”

  “Mr. Harrison.” I nodded. “Thank you.”

  Stepping forward, Will handed me another stunning bouquet. “These, of course, are for you.”

  I smiled, remembering the last time he’d given me these same flowers. “Black-eyed Susans.”

  His eyes twinkled, and the right side of his lips tipped up in a half smile. “Yes. I believe I mentioned they seem to suit ya.”

  Holding back my own grin, I waved my hand toward the closest chair. “Thank you. Please have a seat.”

  Will sat on the chair nearest Mother Elizabeth, and I sat directly opposite him.

  “Mr. Harrison,” Mother Elizabeth said. “May we offer you some refreshment?”

  “No, ma’am, but thank you. I’d actually hoped I might take Miss Hastings out for another walk, if she’s up for it.” Turning his attention to me, he asked, “Would ya like to take a walk, Miss Hastings?”

  “Yes, I believe I will,” I replied. “Mother Elizabeth, d’ya mind?”

  “Not at all,” she replied. “Please—go and enjoy yourselves.”

  Like before, we said nothing on our walk toward Legion Park, only this time the silence was oppressive. Will was clearly waiting for me to speak, and I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to say. As we approached our destination, however, I found my voice.

  “Mr. Harrison,” I began. “Why is it ya always require me to break the silence when we’re together?”

  Will grinned a slow smile but said nothing for the longest time, leaving me edgy in the silence. Finally turning to me he said, “I wondered how long it’d take ya to say somethin’.”

  We’d now reached the park and found the bench we’d shared on our last visit. Will swept his arm forward and offered me a seat. I sat, my shoulders tense, while I waited for him to take his seat beside me.

  “So then, Victoria,” he said. “You’ve had time to consider my proposal?”

  I nodded. “I have.”

  The silence stretched between us, each of us waiting to see who would concede defeat and speak first.

  “And?” Will lifted a mocking brow. “D’ya plan to leave me in suspense?”

  I bit my lip to keep from smiling “Well, before I can answer, I have some questions.”

  “Of course ya do, Victoria.” He laughed. “Okay, then. How can I help?”

  “First, I’d like to know about your children. What can ya tell me about them? How long has it been since they lost their mother, and how do they feel about gaining a stepmother? Especially one nearly their own ages?”

  Will thought for a long moment, his gaze turning out toward the pond in the distance. When I thought he wouldn’t answer, he turned back toward me. “In all honesty, I haven’t discussed it with them, so I have no idea how they feel. Really, how they feel isn’t important. At some point, they’ll all leave to pursue their own lives, and I have no intention of livin’ the remainder of my life alone and without companionship. So it’s really not their concern.”

  I shook my head. “I disagree with you, but that’s a fair answer. How long has it been since they lost their mother?”

  “Fifteen months. Hannah—their mother—was ill for the longest time after Catherine’s birth. I’m not sure she ever completely recovered, and the hardships of farm life didn’t agree with her; especially in her weakened state.”

  “I see. What are the hardships of livin’ on a farm? I’ve lived in town my whole life, so I know nothin’ of farmin’ and the like. I’m not convinced it would agree with me.”

  “I have no doubt you’d do fine. But, to answer your question, you’d work with the children to take care of the chores close to the house—things like milkin’ the cows and feedin’ the chickens, horses, goats and the hog. Those types of things. Additionally, I’d expect ya to care for the children and my home.”

  “But I know nothin’ about farm animals. I’ve never milked a cow. I’m not even sure I’d know the difference between a pig and a hog.”

  “We’ll teach ya. I have faith in your ability to learn quickly, and even greater faith in your inner strength.”

  “Okay, then.” I nodded. “Tell me more about your children. I know their ages and genders, but tell me somethin’ about who they are.”

  Will smiled and his eyes shone with pride as he spoke. “Caroline and Olivia are the oldest. They’re quiet girls, but strong and hard-workin’. They’ll help ya learn your way around the farm. The twins, Joseph and Daniel, will spend most days with me in the fields. They’re good boys, but easily led into mischief if their energies aren’t directed properly. Then there’s Catherine. She’s the most like ya, I think. Spunky and full of life. She prefers playin’ with her brothers and wearin’ britches, yet she works hard to please her older sisters.”

  “And your mother and father?” I asked.

  “They live about a mile away on the adjacent property with my brother, Atticus, and his wife, Veronica. We’ll see ’em once in a while since we live so close. They’re our nearest neighbors next to Earl and Julianne.”

  “Forgive me for askin’, but I heard your first wife and your mother were frequently at odds.” My face flushed with heat, but I had to ask the question. “How will your mother feel about ya bringin’ home a new wife?”

  “It’s really none of her concern,” he responded.

  “Yes but—”

  “There are no buts, Victoria. You’ll be my wife, and my mother can think about it any way she chooses. She’s an opinionated woman—difficult, some would say—but I’m not really concerned with what she has to say. I care about what you have to say. Your opinion will always come first.”

  The silence stretched between us as I thought on his words. Could I go through with this arrangement? I was totally unprepared for the life he was proposing. But I was equal parts terrified and intrigued. I had to get married, that much was evident. The Kirks had given me enough already. It was time I made my own way. Squaring my shoulders, I made a decision.

  “Mr. Harrison, before I agree to marry you, I have a few conditions.”

  Will chuckled. “Of course ya do, Victoria. I would expect nothing less. Tell me your conditions, and I’ll see if I can accommodate. But first, I must insist upon a condition of my own.”

  “Alright, then. Go ahead, please. If I’m unable to comply with your condition, then there’s no reason to negotiate mine.”

  Will shook his head in amusement. Now, smiling broadly, he took my hand. “Victoria, ya have to call me Will. I can’t be ‘Mr. Harrison’ to ya anymore.”

  I swallowed the lump in my throat and closed my eyes to collect myself. Taking a deep breath, I opened my eyes. “Very well, Will. I can do that.”

  “Thank you. Now, tell me your conditions, and let’s see if we can come to an agreement.”

  Clearing my throat, I forged ahead. “First, the children shouldn’t call me ‘Mother’ or ‘Mama’ or even ‘Mother Victoria.’ I’m not nearly old enough to be any of their mothers, and it’d make me feel ridiculous. They’ve had a mother, and I’m sure they loved her. I w
on’t have them thinkin’ I’m tryin’ to take her place. I insist they call me Victoria.”

  Scratching his upper lip, Will covered his smile with the tip of his finger. “You’ve given this a lot of thought.”

  “I have.”

  “Very well, then. Victoria it’ll be,” he said.

  “Thank you.”

  “Your next condition?”

  “Alright.” I nodded. “If I’m to act as mother to these children, especially given my nearness to their own ages, I simply will not be undermined. They’ll have to respect my decisions, and I’ll need your support. I can’t have them comin’ to you to overrule the decisions I make in your absence.”

  Will nodded. “Another well-considered condition, Victoria. Ya never cease to surprise me. Very well. In my absence, your word will be the law in our home. I will not undermine ya in front of the children. I can’t say I’ll always agree with ya—in those cases, we’ll work together and come to a compromise.”

  “I believe that’s fair.” I nodded. “Yes—I can live with that.”

  Will’s lips twitched, but he held back his smile. “Very well, then. Any other conditions?”

  “Just a couple. I insist on a simple ceremony, presided over by Reverend Patterson. No fanfare. Just the two of us and our families. No reception, and no unnecessary guests. Just simple.”

  “You’re sure? You’ll only get to do this once,” he reminded.

  “Yes. Forgive me for sayin’, but this isn’t a love match. A fancy weddin’ would make a mockery of what we’re doin’ here. I prefer an intimate ceremony with only those closest to us in attendance.”

  “Alright then. Any other conditions?”

  “Only one last condition. Ya gotta ask Father Caleb for my hand. Though you well-know he’s not my natural father, he’s acted as my father these last ten years. He deserves the right to give his blessing.”

  “I expected as much,” he replied. “Of course. I’ll ask him straight away. D’ya anticipate any obstacles in that regard?”

  “None at all.” I shook my head. “Well, perhaps exceptin’ the age gap between us. However, Father Caleb has always wished to see me happy. If he believes this makes me happy, then he’ll give his consent.”

 

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