by Terri Reed
Chase turned his stormy gaze to Nick. “That was reckless and stupid. You both could’ve been killed. What were you thinking?”
Quickly, Ashley held up a hand, keeping Nick from talking. “This was my idea. I had to do something to help. I’m tired of sitting on the sidelines, watching everybody else do the work, while I cower in the corner. If I could’ve driven this Humvee by myself, I would’ve.” She cast Nick a glance. “But he wouldn’t let me take over the wheel.”
Nick held up his hands. “Hey, she’s a force to be reckoned with. You have your hands full, buddy.”
Chase’s jaw firmed. “Yes, I’m getting that idea.”
Heat flushed through Ashley and she was sure her cheeks were bright red. “I’m right here.” She gripped Chase’s forearm. “Lucinda? Is she—” Ashley’s breath laid trapped in her lungs as she waited to hear his answer.
“Unharmed,” he said.
A swoosh of relief overwhelmed Ashley. She sank against the backrest and released her hold on Chase. “Thank you, Jesus.”
Movement over Chase’s shoulder drew her attention. Alex and the sheriff led two handcuffed men toward the sheriff’s vehicle. Behind them, Lucinda wheeled herself out of the house, confirming Chase’s words that the older woman was safe.
Focusing on Chase, Ashley placed her hand on his chest. His gear masked his heartbeat beneath her palm, but she could see the rapid pulse thumping at the base of his neck where his collar and the vest revealed his skin. He was still hyped from the situation. “I’m sorry that you were scared. But we’re fine. Everything worked out.”
“This time.” He covered her hand with his. “You can’t do stuff like that. You have to stop trying to control everything.”
His words pierced through her to the core. She did have an issue with control. How did she change that aspect of her personality?
Then he drew her out of the vehicle and into his embrace, his strong arms holding her close. Her arms went around his waist and she rested her head against his shoulder. She didn’t want to ever leave the warmth of his hug. She wanted to snuggle closer, only there was all this stuff between them. Not only his tactical gear, but the specter of Maksim Sokolov and her imminent departure with the US Marshals into the WITSEC program.
“Nick Delaney!” Kaitlyn’s strong voice rang out as the deputy marched toward the Humvee. “That was the most reckless, juvenile, thoughtless, inconsiderate and inconceivable thing I have ever seen anyone do! You could have been seriously injured.”
Guilt for putting Nick in Kaitlyn’s crosshairs blossomed in Ashley. She disengaged from Chase and hustled around to the other side of the Humvee to take responsibility, but this time it was Nick who held up a hand, staying her words.
He stood at the open door of the vehicle with a wide grin as he faced the female deputy glaring at him. “Deputy Lanz, I didn’t know you cared.”
Chase’s chuckle drew Ashley’s attention. He’d followed her around the Humvee and now stood at her elbow. He leaned close to say, “I’m sure Lucinda would like to see you.”
Knowing he was right and that neither Nick or Kaitlyn needed them gawking as they verbally sparred, Ashley tucked her arm through Chase’s and hurried to Lucinda’s side. The older woman spread her arms wide, inviting Ashley in for an embrace.
Ashley bent forward to hug the older woman. Clung to her, really. Tears of gratitude that she was safe and sound stung Ashley’s eyes. She finally released her hold on Lucinda and stared into her dark eyes. “I’m so sorry this happened. You should never have been in danger. This is all my fault.”
Lucinda shook her head and waved a hand. “Not your fault, Ashley. Those men didn’t know who they were dealing with.” She beamed at Chase, obviously proud of the man she’d help raise. “And they are as scared of Mr. Sokolov as you are.”
“Did they tell you that?” Chase asked.
Lucinda shielded her eyes against the April sun to stare up at him. “They didn’t have to. Anytime his name was brought up, the two men cringed. Whatever hold he has on them, it’s strong.”
Chase rubbed a hand over his jaw. “I kind of figured as much.” He glanced around. “I don’t want to take any chances that there are more of them lurking about.” He grasped the handles of Lucinda’s wheelchair. “Let’s get you both inside.”
A shiver of apprehension traipsed down Ashley’s spine as she hurried to open the front door. Once they were inside the house, the adrenaline that had pumped through Ashley’s veins ebbed and tremors worked over her flesh.
Chase locked the wheels on Lucinda’s wheelchair and rushed to Ashley. Rubbing her arms, he said, “You’ve had a shock.” He led her to the couch.
Appreciating his kindness, Ashley held his hand before taking a seat.
He gave her hand a squeeze before saying, “I need to talk to the sheriff to see if I can buy us some time before we have to go to the courthouse.”
“That would be helpful,” she said. “I’m all sweaty and hot and I would really like to change my clothes.”
“Same here.” He left through the front door.
“Can I get you some water?” Lucinda asked as she unlocked her wheels.
Distressed, Ashley jumped to her feet. “I should be the one asking you if you need water or anything at all. You’re the one who was just held hostage.”
Without waiting for a response, Ashley rushed into the kitchen. She stopped as tears sprung to her eyes. Gripping the sink, she hung her head as the stress of the past few days washed over her. She’d never experienced such heaviness of heart. She’d put good people in jeopardy. Today could have ended so differently. Lucinda could have been seriously hurt or worse. Chase could have lost so much. But it would be over soon. They would be free of her and the danger she’d brought to this town and its citizens.
“Glasses are in the cupboard to the left of the sink on the bottom,” Lucinda said from the threshold to the kitchen.
Ashley jerked upright and nodded with a forced smile. She grabbed two short water glasses and filled them with water from the refrigerator filter system. She handed one to Lucinda. Her hands shook, and she sloshed water onto Lucinda’s slacks.
Grimacing, Ashley set her glass down and grabbed a towel to wipe up the mess. “I’m so sorry.”
Lucinda waved her away. “It’s only water. It’ll dry.” She wheeled herself over the threshold of the kitchen and moved farther into the living room. “Come on, let’s take our glasses and get you back to the couch. You’re going to collapse if we don’t.”
The thought of collapsing actually sounded good to Ashley. Unsteady on her feet, she followed Lucinda back to the living room and sat down. Placing her glass on the coffee table, Lucinda wheeled closer and took Ashley’s free hand. “Honey, what are you going to do about Chase?”
Ashley tucked in her chin, her eyes widening at the question. “Do about Chase?”
Belatedly, Ashley remembered the first time she’d been here and Chase had commented about Lucinda playing matchmaker. Ashley couldn’t let this woman hope for something that could never happen. “There’s nothing between Chase and me.”
Lucinda patted her hand. “I don’t believe that for a second and neither do you. I’ve known that boy his whole life. He was upset that I was in danger, but it was nothing compared to the anguish I saw on his face when he thought you might be hurt. My boy loves you. He may be too stubborn to realize it yet, though, so you’re going to have to point it out to him.”
Ashley’s heart jumped into her throat. She set her glass down and retracted her hand from Lucinda. “No, no, no.” Standing, Ashley paced back and forth in front of the couch, agitation running rampant through her body. “That can’t be true.”
“What do you feel for him, Ashley?”
Lucinda’s softly asked question stopped Ashley in her tracks. If she was going to be honest with Lucinda, and with herself,
she would admit that she had deep feelings for Chase. Feelings that she had no business having for him. Feelings that she had locked away and couldn’t let out of the little cage she’d locked them in. Because if she admitted how much she cared for—maybe even loved—Chase, leaving him would only be that much more painful.
She faced Lucinda. “As soon as I give my deposition, I will be leaving with the US Marshals Service. I will never see Chase, or any of you, again.”
Lucinda made a face and waved her hand, a gesture that was so innate to the older woman, Ashley fought a smile. “We can get around all that. What I want to know, Ashley, is are you willing to take the risk on Chase?”
Risk? The word reverberated through Ashley’s brain. “I can’t risk that something will happen to Chase, or you, again. My being here, in your lives, puts everyone at risk.”
Lucinda’s expression softened and her voice gentled. “Honey, there are no guarantees in life. God never said life would be fair, only that He would be with us in every circumstance.”
Those words echoed inside of Ashley. Words she’d heard before and words she clung to now. “Though I agree with you that there are no guarantees, there are some things I can control. My leaving is one of those. I will not, in any way, shape or form, destroy Chase’s life by staying here.”
“He could go with you, you know.” Lucinda’s steady gaze pinned her to the floor. “That happens with witnesses. My husband was a police officer. I know how the witness protection program works. Family members can go with the witness.”
Ashley’s heart twisted in her chest. “Please, understand. He’s not my family. He’s yours.”
All this talk of family and love was giving her palpitations. Her heart acted like the injured bird she’d once rescued and transported in a cardboard box to the bird sanctuary. Tap, tap, tap. Scratch, scratch, scratch. If her ribs weren’t already sore from the seat belt, she’d guess they’d have been sore from the pain within her chest.
The door opened and Kaitlyn walked in. She leveled Ashley with a stern scowl. “Chase tells me it was your idea to ram the Humvee into the SUV.”
“And what a good idea it was,” Lucinda said.
Though Ashley was grateful to the older woman for her support, she faced Kaitlyn’s displeasure head on. “Yes, it was my idea. I had to do something”
Kaitlyn harrumphed. “Well, he didn’t have to go along with it. He was in the driver’s seat.”
Ashley grimaced. “To be fair, I told him if he didn’t do it, I would push him out and drive the Humvee myself.”
Kaitlyn’s gaze narrowed. “And you would’ve too, right?”
Squaring her shoulders, Ashley said, “Yes. I’ve learned a lot from you and Chase and Leslie. I’m not going to be some idle victim anymore. I want to take control of my life. The first thing I need to do is tell my story to the DA and then—” Ashley’s voice faltered as her determination tripped over itself. Taking a deep breath, she continued, “Then I’m going into witness protection. I am going to blossom. Because if I don’t, then Mr. Sokolov has won even if he hasn’t eliminated me as he’d like to.”
The respect and admiration in Kaitlyn’s eyes warmed Ashley’s heart. “Good for you. I still think it was foolhardy to risk your life, and Nick’s life, but I understand.”
Ashley was certain Kaitlyn did. Because Ashley was pretty sure Kaitlyn would’ve made the same choice.
Chase stepped inside, his gaze meeting Ashley’s. “You’re right, Ashley, you do need to blossom.”
Apparently he’d overheard her speech. Embarrassment heated her cheeks, but she refrained from putting her hands to her face or dropping her gaze. She meant what she’d said.
“And I will do everything in my power to make sure you can,” he continued.
Ashley frowned, not sure what he meant and too afraid to ask. Then she mentally scoffed. She’d just told everybody she was going to take control of her life and stop being a victim. And yet she was too afraid to ask a simple question for clarification from Chase.
But with everybody staring at her, them—Lucinda’s gaze was hopeful while Kaitlyn’s was intrigued—Ashley decided the better course of action was to remain silent.
There was something in Chase’s gaze that she couldn’t decipher, something between respect and affection and fear. She wished they were alone so she could explore what was going on, what he was thinking. But then again, did she really want to open herself up to that kind of heartache?
“So, what’s the plan now?” Ashley asked, needing to change the subject and direct the conversation toward actions rather than emotions.
“Kaitlyn’s going to take you to Leslie’s, while the sheriff and Alex process these guys. Daniel went with the injured man to the hospital and will make sure he doesn’t escape.”
“And you?” Ashley asked.
“I’m going to get Lucinda somewhere safe,” he said. “Then I’ll join you at Leslie’s.”
That was good news to Ashley. She didn’t like leaving knowing Lucinda could still be in danger. Ashley went to Lucinda and kissed her cheek and whispered in her ear, “I’m sorry. I’m just not brave enough.”
Ashley walked out, following Kaitlyn to her car. The second she settled on the passenger seat, she tilted her head back and closed her eyes. Silently she prayed, Lord, give me strength. Why did life have to be so hard?
* * *
Once the door closed behind Ashley and Kaitlyn, Chase stood there for a moment, his head bowed as he murmured a quick prayer, “Lord, please watch over Ashley.”
He had to trust that Kaitlyn and Leslie would take care of Ashley until he could get there. But his next order of business was to ensure Lucinda’s safety. He turned to his former nanny. “You need to pack a bag. I’m taking you out to the Johnsons’ house. They’ve agreed to have you stay with them until this whole mess is over.”
“That’s awfully nice,” she said. “I like them.” She started to wheel away and then spun back toward him. “So, Ashley?”
Confused by her question because he’d already explained that she was going to Leslie’s and then to the courthouse, he said, “I’m going to make sure she gets to the courthouse safely so she can give her deposition. Then I will wait with her until the US Marshals take her into protective custody.” And he was going to make sure the marshals understood that if anything happened to her under their watch, they would have to answer to him, and all of Bristle Township.
“That’s not what I meant.” The intensity in her eyes made him twitchy. “I meant, what are you going to do about how you much you care about her?”
The question tied his stomach up in knots. He undid the straps on his flak vest. He had no idea what he was going to do about the emotions crowding his chest, emotions that all centered on one platinum blonde with big beautiful eyes. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Seriously, you’re going with that answer?” Lucinda wheeled herself to his side and leveled her arthritic index finger at him. “Chase Fredrick, I have known you your whole life. You have strong feelings for that young lady. And she has strong feelings for you.”
Her pronouncement stilled his hands. He glanced at Lucinda and, noting the determined expression in her eyes, his stomach slid toward his toes. “Don’t go getting any hopeful ideas about me settling down. I’ve already explained this to you. I like my life the way it is.”
That the future stretched out in a lonely abyss before him was something he didn’t want to address. “Ashley’s leaving, so whatever emotion she, or I, feel toward one another stems from the circumstances. There’s nothing lasting between us. I need to stay rational and keep my feelings out of this situation.”
“You can’t tell me that work is going to be the one and only thing in your life.”
How many times had he heard this lecture? She sounded like a broken record. Only for some reason, her
words stung now, where in the past he could laugh them off. He shrugged off his flak vest and set it on the couch before taking a seat to undo the laces on his boots. “Please, go pack your bag.”
She hesitated for a moment and he thought she would continue her interrogation. But instead she whirled away and rolled down the hall to her bedroom.
Letting out a beleaguered sigh, Chase ran a hand over his stubbled jaw. He did have deep emotions for Ashley. Some of which he was afraid to label, but they were so muddled with fear and responsibility and protection, he didn’t know which end of his emotions was up and which was down. But he’d told Lucinda the truth. He liked his life and he didn’t want to make any changes. Or at least, that’s what he told himself. And he used to believe it, 100 percent. But now...he couldn’t deny the ache filling him, making him long to find a way to make a future with Ashley.
You could go with her.
The unbidden thought marched into his consciousness. That idea grabbed hold of his imagination and wouldn’t let go. What would it be like to start over, a fresh and new life with Ashley by his side?
But he couldn’t leave Lucinda behind. And he couldn’t ask her to go. Plus, he would miss the community of Bristle Township, his coworkers, his friends and his church. He’d made a life for himself here. One apart from his parents, where no one wanted to use him as a way to gain access to the vaunted Fredricks.
Was he willing to give up his carefully constructed life for Ashley?
The answer should have come easily, but he was so conflicted. A state of being he didn’t usually find himself in.
Frustrated, he marched into the bathroom and quickly showered and shaved, then changed into a fresh uniform. When he returned to the living room, Lucinda was waiting.
“Okay, this is the last thing I’m going to say on the subject,” she said over her shoulder as she wheeled toward the front door. At the portal, she faced him, her earnest expression tearing his conscience. “Your job is not enough. You’re going to grow old alone. You need Ashley and she needs you. Do what you have to do to be with her.” With that, she opened the door and wheeled out, leaving Chase staring after her.