I clenched my fists. “Some truth should stay buried if it serves no purpose. He will carry this with him for the rest of his existence now.”
Tobias rolled his eyes. “We all have our burdens to bear.”
My eyes shifted to black. “You disgust me. You only did this to make yourself feel better. Everything is always about you,” I spat at him and left the room to go look for Aldric.
Five
By the sound of the clanking in the weapons room, I knew I’d find Aldric in there. He was striking an armored mannequin with a scythe. Not with any precision, however.
I watched in silence for a moment as he took out his aggression. I wanted to wrap my arms around him and tell him everything was going to be okay, but I just stood there, frozen in place.
His eyes were still shifted when he looked at me. “You shouldn’t be down here, Gray.”
I blinked back tears. “Where should I be, then? You’re in pain. Let me help you.”
He shrugged and took another swing at the mannequin. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
My heart felt like it was going to burst inside my chest. “Aldric, please don’t shut me out. You were just a child then. It wasn’t your fault.”
The vein in his neck throbbed as he threw the scythe across the room. It bounced off the stone wall and clanked onto the ground.
He whipped around to face me, his nostrils flared. “I killed my parents. What part of that don’t you get? I’m a danger to you and everyone around me. Stop trying to make me into something I’m not.”
I bit my lip to keep it from trembling. “It was an accident. You didn’t know what you were doing. Don’t beat yourself up over something you had no control of.”
His eyes were cold and emotionless. “Maybe I still don’t have control. Maybe I’ve just been hiding in your shadow…shielded by your magic. Look how easy it was for Jezebel to possess me. And how quickly I let you convince me to join you back in New Orleans. I let you turn me into a Dhampir without any hesitation. I’m weak, Gray. And as long as I’m around you, I will stay that way.”
His words stung like a hot blade, ripping through my insides. “What…what are you saying?” My heart was in my throat.
He let out a deep sigh and ran a pale hand through his icy blond hair. “I need space—time to think. I don’t know who I am anymore. I doubt I ever did. Everything I’ve ever known has been a lie. I’m sorry…I can’t marry you. Not right now. Not like this.”
My chest tightened and threatened to suck out all the air in my lungs. “You are not weak. You’re hurt and confused. Please, don’t do this. Let me help you.” Panic spread through my limbs.
Aldric shook his head. “I have to figure this out on my own or you’ll never respect me. I’ll never respect myself. I need to be useful, not a hindrance. I’m leaving at dawn.”
My knees trembled. I gripped the armory wall to steady myself. “Where will you go?” My teeth chattered as I struggled to hold onto my voice.
He looked down as his eyes shifted back to blue. “To the Harpy Forest. If I spend some time with Iris, maybe I can convince her to let you into Elysium.”
My heart was breaking. “You don’t have to do that for me. I’m working on a way to get us in. Aldric, please. I need you here.”
Aldric looked up, his blue eyes were devoid of any sparkle. “You don’t need me, Gray. You are the strongest woman I’ve ever known, but I don’t want to hold you back anymore. When Dragos was in Tartarus, you didn’t rush to get him out. You left him there because you knew he was strong enough to handle it. Instead, you rushed to rescue me from Jezebel because you knew I couldn’t. You don’t see me as your equal.”
A dull ache began to spread through my bones. My eyes shifted to black. “So that’s it then? Your intimidation of me is driving you away? Sounds like you’ve felt this way for a long time. Well, I’m not going to apologize to you for being strong and capable. And I have never asked you to be anything but yourself.”
Aldric sighed. “I know, and I love you for that. But this isn’t just about you. It’s about my own feelings of inadequacy. I need to be greater than I am. If I’m by your side, you will always jump in to protect me. I need to be on my own. Let me do something for you for once. Let me talk to Iris.”
If my eyes could get any darker I would have resembled a shadow demon. He was breaking my heart and hardening it at the same time. “It seems you have made up your mind. I won’t stand in your way…if you want to go, then go.”
He nodded. “It’s for the best. You’ll see that someday. Don’t think I’m abandoning you, Gray. I just want to play my part…earn my place. I will do everything I can to convince the Harpies to help you.”
My body was numb. His lips grazed my cheek as he whispered goodbye, but my flesh felt nothing. I didn’t move a muscle as I listened to the sound of his footsteps echoing through the catacombs until they were a faint whisper and then…gone.
I moved aimlessly through the halls, lifeless and devoid of all emotion. My legs grew heavier with each step I took. Aldric was gone. I could feel it. The absence of his presence screamed out at me with every corner I turned.
Valentina and Dragos each drew in a sharp breath as I dragged my feet into the study. The silence was so loud, it tugged at my nerves while their eyes watched me with caution.
I snickered, bitterness rising in my throat. “I’m not going to burn the Hall down if that’s what you are afraid of.”
Valentina ran to my side. “Are you okay? Of course, you’re not okay. I shouldn’t have asked that. It was a stupid question.”
I faked a half-smile. “It’s fine, Val. He made his choice. I knew it would happen eventually.” I didn’t know if I was trying to convince them or myself.
Dragos shook his head. “He’s a coward.” A venomous tone rumbled in his voice.
Valentina shot him a look. “Not now, brother.”
I wanted to climb out of my own skin. I couldn’t bear the look of pity on their faces. “I’m fine, really. Let’s just focus on getting into Elysium.” I was far from fine, but if I spent one more second dwelling on Aldric, I’d be tempted to rip this place to shreds.
Dragos nodded. “The two of you should go speak with Nadia in Romania. I’ll head to Stonehaven to see what Seven knows.”
For once, it was nice to have someone else come up with a plan. I didn’t have the energy to make decisions at this current moment. A trip to Romania, however fruitless it may be, was just the distraction I needed.
I let out a sigh of relief. “Then it’s settled. We’ll meet you back at Stonehaven when we’re done.”
Dragos started toward the door but turned back. “You don’t always have to be the strong one, Gray. If you fall apart, I’ll…we’ll put you back together.” I nodded right before he winked and took off down the Hall.
Valentina cupped my face in her hands. “Aldric loves you. He’ll come back to you. I just know it.”
I nodded and forced another smile, but that familiar feeling of dread returned in the pit of my stomach. That old reminder that nothing good ever lasted in our world. Love…it wasn’t tangible…just an idea. Just a fairytale told to children. You can’t lose what was never yours to begin with.
Six
The last time I was at Striga Castle, Dragos and I had found Aldric—not himself and under the control of the Serpent Bearers. There was no magic to blame it on this time. He was in his right mind and wanted nothing to do with me. I wished he was under a spell so I could break it and return everything back to the way it was. Being back here, it felt like I was losing him all over again.
The black iron gates opened for us without hesitation. A line of Dhampir soldiers waited to greet us at the front steps. The customs and formalities of our ancient ways were a comforting sight. A reminder of who I was now and the importance of my duties as the leader of the Consilium. A reminder that there wasn’t time to dwell on the mundane matters of a broken heart.
Nadia emerged fr
om the castle like a desert Siren, her tanned skin glowing in the torchlight. She sauntered down the steps as we got out of the car, her eyebrows slightly raised.
She gave me a slight bow. “Imperator. What matter requires you to have arrived in person?” Her tone was unusually formal.
I glanced around at all the eager eyes. Her coven members watched us with curiosity, their hearts beating out of their chests.
“Is there someplace we can speak privately?” I doubted she wanted any of her underlings to know the danger they were in with the Harpies.
She looked back and forth between me and Valentina, attempting to read our faces. “Of course. This way.”
We followed her up a sweeping staircase. The railing was etched with gold and pearl filigree. It glowed underneath crystal chandeliers that lined the ceiling above us. Not a single luxury had been spared in this castle. From its marble and ivory floors to its silk tapestried walls, it was like stepping into a royal palace. It was no secret that Nadia coveted the finer things in life, but it was going to take more than an entire case of Dom Perignon to convince her to leave the comfort of this castle.
After walking up three more flights of stairs, she ushered us into a rotunda room—stocked to the brim with wine and liquor. There were bottles of pink champagne, coffee colored rum, bright green absinthe, blood red ports and amber cognacs—vintage and new alike. The room smelled of musk and wood, rich and earthy.
She motioned for us to sit by the fire as she plopped herself down on an overstuffed burgundy ottoman. Valentina and I took a seat across from her on its matching velvet couch.
A Dhampir servant set out three crystal goblets on the maple wood table that stood between us and proceeded to pour a light yellow and honey tinged liquid from a jewel-studded decanter.
Nadia raised her glass. “Sauterne, my favorite dessert wine. Sadly, I don’t have any foie gras to offer with it.”
We clanked our glasses together in salute before sipping, a human custom that we embraced. The wine was sweet and syrupy like candy. It left a sugar coating across my tongue.
I waited for the servant to leave the room and made sure that his footsteps were moving away from the door. Satisfied that we were alone and out of earshot, I set down my glass and gathered my thoughts.
Nadia’s lip twitched. “So, what’s the bad news, ladies?”
Valentina shifted in her chair. “A little birdy told us you’ve been up to no good.”
She raised and eyebrow. “Care to elaborate?”
I leaned forward, catching her eye. “I’ll get straight to the point. The Harpy leader, Iris, believes you killed her sister Victoria. One of your men was seen dumping her freshly drained body on their doorstep. What do you have to say for yourself?”
Nadia’s face fell, a droplet of sweat forming on her brow. Her knuckles whitened as she gripped her goblet and took a long swig of the dessert wine. Her movements were slow but deliberate.
She tapped her fingernails on the table. “It was a long time ago and things didn’t happen exactly as you think.”
I nodded. “Time for you to elaborate then.”
She raised her chin and gazed out the rotunda window. “When Victoria came to me, we were in the middle of the Renaissance period. Art and music were flourishing, the wine was flowing, and my coven was thriving at the center of it. We were having the time of our lives. That Harpy wasn’t as innocent as she led her sisters to believe. She wanted a piece of what we had. She wanted to be like us. I let her play with us for a while. It wasn’t long before her true colors came out. She stabbed me in the back, so…I killed her for it. End of story.”
The words rolled off Nadia’s tongue as easy as if she had been reading aloud a simple potion recipe. There was no remorse, no emotion behind it.
Valentina nearly choked on her wine. “You can’t just kill the sister of a Harpy leader, Nadia. There are consequences no matter what happened.”
Nadia chuckled. “Iris wasn’t the leader at the time and that manipulative little bird had it coming.”
I let out a deep sigh. “What did Victoria do to you that was so bad you had to kill her?” I wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt, but her flippant attitude was making it harder by the minute.
Nadia narrowed her eyes, annoyed. “How should I remember? It happened over five centuries ago. I can’t believe those whiny birds are still holding a grudge over it. Don’t you find that irritating?” She shuddered just thinking about it.
My jaw tightened. I took a deep breath and lowered my voice. “What I find irritating is your lack of remorse coupled with your need to kill someone over something that you can’t even remember. Iris and Nemesis are demanding justice for this. In fact, they won’t let me into Elysium until I turn you over to them. Do you see the predicament you’ve put me in?”
Nadia erupted into laughter. “You can’t be serious. You are going to hand me over to a bunch of heathens? I think not. It goes against our rules. Surely you and they are aware of that?”
Valentina lunged across the table and wrapped her hands around Nadia’s throat. “You think this is funny? This is not a game. There are Underworld demons in New Orleans. We will do whatever is necessary to stop them. There are no rules anymore.” Nadia’s eyes bulged out of her head.
I stood up. “Val, let her go.” The color was draining from her face.
Valentina grunted and pushed Nadia’s head back before letting go.
Nadia coughed as she glared at us. “Victoria betrayed me. She deserved what she got. I did nothing wrong. Killing her was merciful. Those are the Dhampir ways. You both know this. If you want to give me over to the Harpies, you will have to drag me, kicking and screaming.”
Valentina’s eyes flashed red. “That can be arranged.”
Nadia winced. “The other coven leaders won’t approve.”
I snapped, “The other coven leaders aren’t in charge. I am. And none of us will have a say in anything if Cerberus gets his way. I don’t think you understand how serious this is.”
Nadia threw up her hands. “This is ridiculous. I have committed no crime. As my Imperator, you owe me the benefit of the doubt.”
Valentina rolled her eyes. “Gray doesn’t owe you anything.”
Whether Nadia was telling the truth or not, she was right. I had to weigh both sides. I couldn’t just send her to the slaughter without at least considering the possibility that Victoria had provoked her.
My head was pounding. “Enough. I will talk to Iris again and plead your case. Maybe there’s a way to settle this without more bloodshed.”
Nadia breathed a sigh of relief. “Thank—”
“If I find out you are lying to me, the Harpies will be the least of your worries. We will conduct a formal investigation and Valentina will question your soldiers before we leave here today.”
She nodded and took another swig of her wine, her hand trembling with each sip she took.
Valentina followed me out of the rotunda. Our hearts raced as we exchanged a look loaded with concern and uneasiness. We both knew that Nadia’s coven would not implicate her, but we couldn’t leave here without showing a presence. But a nagging feeling tugged at my gut—no matter what I did, Iris and Nemesis were not going to let this go.
As my ship pulled into Stonehaven’s docks, a chill passed through me. Aldric would not be here. He wouldn’t be waiting to greet me or shower me with kisses. An empty ache spread through my bones. It made my stomach turn. Valentina eyed me as I gripped the rails, knuckles white. I swallowed hard to keep the bile from rising in my throat.
She raised an eyebrow. “He will come back to—”
“Not now, Val. I don’t want to talk about him anymore.” My eyes were starting to shift to black.
She closed her mouth and then opened it again. “I miss Lycos. The thought of him stuck in that forest with Arcadia is driving me crazy.”
I sighed, relieved to be talking about her issues instead of mine. “Lycos adores you. He left Arca
dia for you. She will try, but he won’t fall for it. Trust me, you have nothing to worry about.”
Her lower lip quivered. “That’s what you thought once about Aldric. What if the same thing happens to us?”
I gritted my teeth to keep my fangs from protruding. She was hitting a nerve. “That’s not the same and you know it. Lycos is strong. He was born into our world. He has nothing to prove to himself or to you. That’s the difference.”
I jumped off the ship and charged up the hill before she could utter another word. I didn’t need any more reminders of Aldric and what we used to have.
Seven and Dragos were outside the gatehouse, huddled in what looked like an intense conversation. Seven’s strength had returned in full, a miracle considering he was imprisoned and tortured in Tartarus. His wavy black hair was pulled into a low knot at the nape of his neck, enhancing his bronzed skin and amber colored eyes. He towered well over Dragos but didn’t outshine him in any way.
Dragos might not have been as tall as Seven, but he was strong and chiseled, put together like a piece of art. His lips were soft and full, with just a hint of a moustache above them. His eyes reflected the shades of a storm, gray and shadowy, so sharp and intense it was as if they could pierce through anything.
They both lit up at the sight of us, cutting off their conversation to greet us with a warm embrace.
Dragos raised an eyebrow. “How did it go with Nadia?”
I rolled my eyes. “As expected. She denied any wrongdoing and refuses to talk to the Harpies.”
Valentina chimed in. “Her soldiers were tight lipped, but they all stand by her story.”
Seven nodded in contemplation. “Of course. They’re loyal to a fault.”
Dragos sighed. “Well, then we go back to Iris and tell her that it’s not going to happen. Maybe Aldric has made some progress with her.” He eyed me to see my reaction.
Gods and Demons (Blood and Darkness Book 3) Page 4