Linder and Poppie Alexander.
Nevertheless, I’d still be dead, and nobody really wants to die at eighteen. At least I’ve gotten to go on a date. I’ve been kissed. I’ve shot the greatest gun in the America, and I made the highest rank as a Creation. The America will know me too. Carden will stand before the citizens and say, “Just Kylie was a badass, and she risked her life for every one of you.”
Ha! Yeah, right.
I’ll go down as another Creation they’ll forget about two months after they discover the enemy murdered me.
“Ky,” Collins calls. “You zoned out?”
I look my food over, sticking my potatoes with my fork. “Collins, I don’t understand why you think you can just address me. We are not friends. Don’t speak to me.”
“You going to have to get over yourself, Ky. We have to look out for each other.”
“I can look out for you and not like you. Just trust me to have your back, and I trust you to have mine.”
“Whatever, Ky,” she says. She rolls her eyes, and her gaze falls on Marc. “Marc, what are you doing after dinner on your last night alive?”
“Not you,” Marc responds and takes a drink of his red soda.
She scolds him with a narrowed glance. “You don’t need to be rude.”
I feel a tickle attacking the back of my neck. I throw a glance over my shoulder and spot Luke staring a hole through me. He waves me to him. I go after throwing away my tray. “What’s wrong?”
They call for the end of dinner after we leave the rec hall.
“I’ll tell you when we get to my room. It’s about tomorrow night.”
“Give me a hint. I hate waiting.”
“I just left a burrow, forced there by two Vojin coyotes, off in the hills.”
“Were you followed?”
“I’m not stupid, Ky.”
“Well, I have to ask.”
A vein is popping out of his forehead, and steam is practically blowing from his ears. “Is it something that made you mad?”
“Not really.”
Okay, I’m going to shut up because he’s not giving me any answers. We reach our house and are the only ones here. Climbing the stairs to his room, my heart is racing, wondering what he could be about to tell me.
Stepping through the door, Luke says, “I need to grab a shower before we talk. After, I’m not going to leave my room.” He heads for the stalls.
Since I’ll have to wait for him anyway, I grab a shower too and head to my room after to dress. I’m out before him and looking out my open door for Luke to return. The instant he returns, I cross the hall to his room and push the door closed, demanding, “Okay, tell me.”
Luke sits on the bed and rubs his hands over his head. He gives a long sigh. “They think we are going to raid their realm. They wanted me to find out who it is and talk them out of it because they plan to come here next week and implement their form of peace.”
“What is their form of peace?”
“The Vojin I spoke to was Noranti, the one who once told us they did not want to destroy our planet or theirs. She wanted to come here as a warning and request we fight with them against the other Vojin who want to kill everyone. You want to know what I told her?”
“What?”
“I told her that I don’t give a shit about her need for help or domination. They have all lied to me, and it would be my pleasure to fight against all of them.” He meets my gaze. “You wanna know what she said?”
I sit, unable to look away from him. “What?”
“She said that if we plan to invade their realm, we can at least spare the lives of the blue and pink Vojin.”
“Why?”
“That’s what I asked. She said they are the ones whose true intentions are to protect the Earth and the outers of our planet. They are under an influence and are unaware of their actions as they have no control of their decisions.”
“What else? Anything useful?”
“They want the important members of Vojin society to be abolished. The ones who are bigger, more silver than blue, bright. If we can get them, the instruction to destroy Earth could be terminated.”
I nod, saying, “That’s good news.”
“Can you turn that light off? Are you sleeping in here?”
“Yes.” I turn off the light and lie beside Luke. “If we don’t make it out, Luke, or if you make it and I don’t, know I love you.”
“I love you too, Ky. And we are either both going to make it, or neither of us is going to make it.”
“If the Vojin get what they want, if they convince the America to do away with Creations, we are out either way.”
“As long as we go out together. What do you have to live for besides me?”
“Nothing,” I say, and it comes out breathless and unsure.
“Kylie?”
“Hmm?”
“If we go in there, and it comes down to save me or Marc, don’t choose to save Marc.”
His request wraps around my neck and strangles me too tightly. I lose the feeling in my toes, but to keep him from sensing my doubt or hesitation, I shake my head. “I won’t, Luke.”
“Good.” He wraps his arm around my head and pulls me to his shoulder.
There’s a knock on his door.
“Now who is this?” Luke complains.
“Probably one of your girlfriends,” I joke.
“I don’t have those. Who is it?”
“Luke?” A girl calls. The voice sounds vaguely familiar.
“Aren’t they supposed to stay in after nightfall? How do you not have this under control yet?” I say as he gets up.
“Yes. You’ll leave or no?”
I curl my lip and gag. “You’re about to be nasty?”
“I have to get it all out of my system before we die.”
Pressing my lips into a thin line, I shake my head as I cross the floor to the door. “Fine.” I pull open the door, and the girl is right on top of it. “Pardon me.”
She moves aside. “Um, hi, Ky.”
“Hi,” I say gruffly, passing her to get to my room. I get here and lie down, but only for a second. Grumbling, I flip onto my left side and then my right. I don’t know why I came in here.
I go to Marc’s room and knock on the door. He returns with a triple knock against the wall. I go in. Closing the door, I keep the knob in my hand as I lean my shoulder against it. “You can’t talk?”
“No.”
“What if I wasn’t me?”
He turns, facing the door. “You are you.”
“Can I come in?”
“Isn’t that why you came here?” He yawns and turns back over. “To come in?”
“Yes. It’s not late, Marc. Why are you so tired?”
He makes a throaty chuckle. “Collins just left. She took a lot out of me.”
My body turns to stone. Why would he tell me that? Drawn speechless, I chew on the inside of my bottom lip. He stares at me, hooded eyebrows rising, the purple in his eyes brightening. My shoulders slacken, and I exhale. “You’re not being serious, right?”
“No. But you’re still holding up the door.”
I sit beside him, and he scoots over for me to lie down. But I remain sitting, leaned over on my knees. Building my courage, I prepare to ask something that’s been sitting in the back of my mind for months now. I stretch the back of my neck and clutch my inner shoulders. “Would you, well, try that with me?”
He lifts his head. “What I was just joking about?”
I nod, but say, “If the question makes you uncomfortable, you don’t have to answer it.”
“Yes, I want to do that with you.” I hold my breath, and my nerves kick in again with his unexpected response. “Why?”
Be brave, Ky. But I can’t say.
“You want to do that with me?”
I look away from him to the window and nod, embarrassed I’m even considering it. My hands are shaking as the jitters jump around in my stomach and chest. They’re
creeping around to my back, and I feel uneasy.
“Just because you say it, doesn’t mean it’s about to happen right now, Ky. You don’t have to be nervous.”
I look back at him. He’s propped up on his elbows, his gaze soft and heavy rasp gentle. “I do if I’m thinking about it happening right now.” I press my hand to the mattress and lean over to kiss him as I move on top of him.
He pushes me back a little. “Mmm, Ky. You do not want to do this right now.”
“You don’t?”
He grabs my thighs, then he glides past my butt to my back. “I do, and for a while now. But that’s intense.”
That odd adrenaline takes me over, and my entire body tingles. I sigh as he touches me again. “The way your touch feels is what’s intense,” I say as my body turns electric. Meeting his eyes, compassion fills the empty spaces in my chest where the electric prickles can’t reach. “Can you tell me you love me?”
He pushes my hair back from my face and silently looks at me for a long time. “Ky,” the words pour from him slowly, “I love you.”
If I were a cup, I’d be flowing over. My heartbeat pulses through every centimeter of me. “And I love you.”
“And you want to do this, tonight?”
“If you do too. Before I die, or I’m discovered, or the world destructs and I never get the chance to be that close to you.”
“Hold on, Ky. I’ll be right back.” He moves me from him and leaves the room. He might be giving me time to reconsider. But I won’t. I want us to advance in this. I’ve wanted it for a while too; I’ve just never had the courage until now. Maybe it’s because I’m facing death, maybe not. But if the option came, and I had to choose between him or Luke, I can make the choice knowing, at least, he and I held nothing back. We knew every bit of each other, and the memory of him will be good enough.
He returns, quietly shutting the door behind him. “Where did you go?” I ask when he sits on his bed.
He looks over his shoulder at me before turning around. “I had to get something.”
“From who?”
“Sean.”
I grab him to me and lie back on his bed. “Why?”
Kissing me once, he hovers over me. “It was important.” He kisses me again. “You sure you want this?”
“Yes, just don’t hurt me with that baseball bat in your pants.”
He laughs, retorting, “What?”
“Nothing.” My legs shake.
“I’ll try not to hurt you. Um.” He looks away from me. “You will be the first girl this happens with, so,” he looks back at me, adding, “tell me if I hurt you.”
I even my breaths and unintentionally whisper, “Okay.”
His kisses to my lips are soft. So gentle I barely feel them. His graze against my skin is even softer, and while a part of me wants to question it, it may just be my nerves. Cautiously, we undress each other, and the heat beats between our bodies. It feels like we’re moving in slow motion, slowly, heavy breaths move time forward. Every time our breaths stalls, so does time.
I push my hands over his back. “I wish I could heal away your scars.”
Lips against mine, he whispers, “Don’t. I often forget they’re there when you’re not touching my back.” Marc leans back, and his eyes shine a unique purple I’ve never seen. “Remember what I said,” he says.
I stop breathing when his hand grips my bare waist. He notices and whispers, “You can tell me to stop.”
“Don’t.” I force the air from my lungs, and he draws near me, nothing separating us. My muscles tense, and I swallow a gasp.
“Stop?” he asks.
I breathe, saying, “No.”
It started off uncomfortable, but it isn’t lasting. We’re losing ourselves when there’s a knock on the door.
“Shit, I knew that was going to happen,” Marc utters.
“It’s probably my brother.”
“Or mine. You want me to get it?”
“No way.”
The door goes unanswered.
I finally relax, wrapping my arms around him, and it seems he’s relaxed as well. Our breaths grow heavy, and an odd pressure builds in my chest until it feels like it explodes. A silverish light blasts out between us, beaming past his shoulders and onto the ceiling.
Marc jumps back and throws his blanket over me, dimming the sudden luminosity of my body. It’s not enough. I scramble to pull the pillow over me, and it helps.
Panicked, he asks, “Is that supposed to happen?”
I shake my head, hugging the items to my body to hide myself. “I don’t know. I’ve never done this before.” I push my hand over my forehead to my hair and release a heavy sigh. My racing heart calms. What the hell is wrong with me? I glow with light now?
Marc cautiously peeks beneath the blanket, and to our relief, I’ve stopped glowing. We sigh, but I keep the blanket clutched in my hand, covering my body as I sit up.
Sitting at the edge of the bed, he rakes his fingers through his hair. “Whoa, Ky. You’re mixed with Vojin, huh?”
“Yeah.” Our breaths have evened out, but the shock is taking a bit to wear off for me. I push my hand across his back and scoot a little closer to him. “I’m sorry. Are you okay?”
His brows knit. “Don’t be sorry. You’re okay?” Looking away from me, he asks, “I didn’t…break anything, did I?”
I look myself over. “No. Nothing is wrong.” I smile and place a kiss to his shoulder. “Maybe it’s a side effect to uh, pleasure.”
He chuckles, turning to face me. “Yeah?” he asks with a seductive drawl.
I nod. “Can we try it again? I’ll keep my alien mojo under control.”
“Your alien mojo is likely going to call your cousins in here, and they’ll see all your naked lady parts.”
I hitch my finger for him to come closer. “We wouldn’t want that.”
Marc eases over me. His hands pressed to the mattress holds up his weight as he looks me over. As if he’s doing a pushup, he sinks down on me and pecks my lips. “Tell me something.” He drops to his elbows and inches separate us. His body is a comfortable weight on mine, and I lift my knees to his sides and push my arms around his back. Through a breath he asks, “Will you choose Luke over me?”
Nervousness shutters my flesh. He feels it. I can tell by the way he drops his gaze to the right. I suspect this has been a burning question for him ever since the night he nearly lost Sean, and I put my life on the line for them. It’s a question I’ve been hoping to avoid. One I would prefer for time to tell while also hoping for the moment to never come. I’d like to think I wouldn’t know what to do if I were put in such a situation. But I do. Slowly, letting my arms fall away from him, feeling as though I’m sinking into the firm mattress, I say, “I’d choose Luke.”
Marc burns me to a crisp with his unrelenting stare. As if snapped out of my disloyal trance, he blinks as his brows bump together in a scowl. “Are you—.” He takes a pause to clear the heavy rasp from his throat. And though it’s not gone, his tone is clearer when he asks, “Ky, are you saying that because you were born to or because that’s what you would do?”
My brows tremble as they meet in their center. I reach for his cheek, and he retracts, turning his head a bit to make it clear he doesn’t want the contact. The pain in his narrowed eyes slowly darkens the purple hue of his gaze. I swallow hard. “I don’t want to answer that.”
My response seems to shove him away from me. He sits at the end of the bed, shoving his hands through his hair as he leans back, forcing his elbows to point to the ceiling and the muscles in his back to react to the movement. Nodding, he relaxes and says, “Okay.”
“Okay?” So simple? After I could read the visible disappointment in his eyes, the regret forcing his chest to rise and fall with every harsh breath… Just, okay?
Marc nods and lies back beside me. “I’m not supposed to love you, Kylie. But I do. And I’m sorry.”
With my arms bent at my chest, he wraps me in
his. “Sorry about what?”
He kisses my forehead and breathes long and hard. “Tomorrow is going to be crazy. Maybe we should call it a night.”
An uneasy feeling attacks my stomach. “Are you sorry for loving me?”
He shakes his head. “Not yet.”
“Well, I love you back. I do.” I swear it.
Chapter Thirty-Eight
I rub my shaking hands together and take deep breaths as I enter Jord’s office. The day has flown by, and I’ve eagerly awaited this very moment. The base is quiet. An eerie quiet that makes me give the empty roads an onceover before I push the door closed behind me. I’m the last one to join the group. Marc and Sean, Collins and Cecelia, Jord and Seits, Harold, and Luke are already here, suited up and getting briefed for our mission.
Jord hands each of us one marble. “We will use one for all of us to get there. Each of you have one to get back if the person next to you doesn’t make it. I don’t expect us to stay together. When you need to come back, throw it against the ground. It will break, jump in, and have it already established when it’s leaving your fingers here is where you want to return. If we all do end up staying together, the hole we jump through will still be here, and we can all jump back through and, of course, end up here. Any questions?”
“No.”
I bump Luke. “Don’t stop until we’re out.”
“Don’t drop.”
“Don’t doubt.”
“I got you.” He lifts his arm vertically with his fist facing the ceiling.
I do the same with mine, saying, “I got you.” Our arms align before we bump the sides of our fists together.
We’ve crowded around Jord’s office. Harold, Seits, and Jord are lined up beside each other, and the rest of us stand twin by twin. I meet Marc’s purple gaze and mouth, “I love you.”
He hesitates before he mouths it back. I turn around to Jord handing out the face masks. They’re black, matching our suits. Placing them over our faces, they cover our nose, mouth, and most of our chin. We strap it on with a plastic dual-sided release buckle. We load our guns with the proper bullets and stuff one into each holster; one’s at my back, my front, my left thigh, and my right ankle. My shotgun is slung over my shoulder by a strap. Along my vest pockets and extra compartments of my suit, I’ve stashed extra ammunition, but Jord has also provided us with backpacks and belts that contain more.
Salient Invaders: A Young Adult Post-Apocalyptic Dystopian Series (The Separation Trilogy Book 2) Page 30