by Vella Wolf
Nyx entered next. His face lit up when I smiled at him, and I caught Dion and Kero, giving him an evil eye. Nyx just winked at the two of them before taking his place to the right, my brothers’ eyes practically bulging out of their heads. I stifled my laugh, turning to watch as Raest glided in. Surprise made its way onto my face, Raest wasn't wearing a robe today. Instead, he wore an elaborate version of his casual attire. His pants were black along with his boots. The shirt was unbuttoned to below his sternum, the colour a dark purple that shone blue in the light. A single, long silver chain hung from his neck, and the umbral moon sigil sat across his toned chest. His hair hung loose, earrings clinking as he walked. The diadem sat atop his brow.
Elren moved to stand before his desk, the rest of us shuffling into place. Raest held out a hand, and the two greeted each other, sharing a brotherly embrace.
“I won't take up much more of your time, we have much to organise once I make my announcement. I wanted to thank you for your hospitality and the warmth you have shown my people. I believe this is just the start of our fortuitous friendship,” Raest smiled.
“Think nothing of it, you have already provided so much for my people. I will be proud to call you family,” Elren beamed.
It was lovely seeing them interact like this, Elren had forced niceties before, but now every word was genuine. So much had changed this past month. Raest stood beside Elren, his eyes wandering from face to face. Our eyes met briefly before they returned to Elren.
Taking in a deep breath, Raest began to speak. “This choice, our alliance, it dictates the future for all of us. I appreciate you all allowing me this time to choose the right bride for myself and my kingdom. I haven't for a second taken this decision lightly, it has consumed all my thoughts this past month. One woman stood out from the rest, right from the beginning, but still, I took my time because I needed to be sure. But now I know I was right and that there isn't anyone that could possibly take her place.” He paused for a moment, taking a deep breath before announcing his choice. “I choose Sabyr.”
The name rang in my ears, a deafening dirge drowning out the panic erupting in the room. My face hung blank, my mind unable to comprehend the words that had come from his lips. This had to be a mistake. This had to be a dream. A nightmare. Reality dawned cruel and harsh as Kero took my arm, digging his fingers into my flesh, trying to wake me from my stupor. His dread-filled face mouthed my accursed name over and over as the sound in the room rumbled back.
Raest's and Wickam’s voices clashed in argument as I gaped in utter disbelief. Frantically I searched the faces in the room for answers. Elren stood silent and fearful, Dion, disturbed. Ophelia and Verona mirrored my expression, sharing my disbelief and Nyx… disbelief wasn't the word for it. Dismay, anger, and betrayal whirled on his face. His hands curled into fists.
Shaking, I turned to the only person who would have answers. With heavy steps, I stumbled towards Raest, his bickering cut short as he noticed my advance. My eyes begged him for answers as my tongue lay still. His eyes gave away nothing as he loomed before me, bearing a new face. Conceited and triumphant. This was the face of an absolute stranger.
A loud thud sounded next to me. Kariss had crumpled to the floor in shock. I bolted to her side, pulling her onto a couch. Celia, as pale as snow, grabbed Kariss' hand, her eyes darting to Elren. For the first time in her life, her features twisted into malevolence, her glare burning into our brother’s skin, demanding action.
“Sabyr wasn't part of the terms!” Elren babbled.
Raest’s smile vanished, cold contempt took its place. “Our terms dictated that I could choose a Feros princess as my bride, Sabyr is counted under this term.”
Elren looked to Wickam.
“Sabyr isn't an official heir!” Wickam protested as he waved papers at his face.
“That matters not. Sabyr is a member of the Feros family, she bears the Feros name. Our families will still be joined,” Raest rebutted.
His circle was silent, Nyx continued to shake with anger. I wanted to scream, but my heart was racing, the words refused to rise to my tongue.
“You courted the other girls, not Sabyr! You don't just get to change your mind and take her!” Kero yelled.
“Kero! Enough! This is not your place!” Wickam growled at him. He took a big gulp, bowing his head to Raest in apology. “Forgive him, he is young,” he said, his voice cracking with anxiety. Wickam was afraid of Raest.
With an amused smile and a flick of his hands, Raest said, “There is nothing to forgive. He is a good brother.”
Raest took a step closer to Elren, looking him straight in the eye. He made our king look small. “I understand that my decision may seem disrespectful and that you expected me to choose from the younger sisters. But I voiced from the start that I came to choose the perfect bride and queen for myself and my kingdom. That woman is Sabyr, and you all know why,” he said, every word laced with light irritation. What in Erohk did he mean by that?!
“Your mind can not be swayed?” Elren said, almost gritting his teeth.
Raest shook his head. “No.”
In the corner of my eye, Kero’s hand slowly dipped to the handle of his blade. Nausea surged through me. This was a nightmare. My tongue finally obeyed.
“Raest!” I called out, drawing the attention of the room. “We need to talk. Alone. Everyone. Please give us the room for a few minutes,” I continued.
My family looked at me, both nervous and defiant. Kero's hand, still resting on his blade.
“Now!” I demanded.
Elren finally nodded. Taking Kariss in his arms, he led the others out of the room. Ophelia and Verona wouldn't meet my gaze as they exited. Nyx left me with a pleading look. The door shut behind them with a mighty slam, and at last, I was alone with the demon king.
I couldn't stop my hands from shaking while my emotions raged within. I walked closer to Raest, stopping just before my brother’s desk, forcing myself to speak.
“Why? Why have you done this?” I asked, trying to hold my composure.
“For the exact reason, I stated. I wanted the best.”
“My sisters are the best! They have been groomed for ladyship, for children, wifehood, for all those things!” I spat.
He laughed heartily as if I had told him the funniest joke he had ever heard.
“If I wanted an adornment for my arm and warmth in my bed, I would have married one years ago from my homeland. I need far more than that.” His words were cold, the warmth I had come to know was utterly absent.
“Elaborate!” I demanded.
Raest sighed at me as if my question was stupid. “Your sisters are lovely, but they are still but wallflowers. They have not been hardened like you, and they would be crushed in a place like Naedis. You are clever, a fighter, you already have combat and court experience, and you are not afraid to make tough choices. Naedis, this upcoming war, they will be full of them.”
All those questions hadn't been idle chatter or curiosity. It was all a test, every minute of it. I felt betrayed, sick to my stomach. The small friendship we had been building had been part of this ruse. He began to notice my distress and continued to speak.
“I told you I was looking for a mate, a true equal to rule by. Do you really think your sisters could take up that mantle?”
I glared at him with resentment and disgust but nodded my head nonetheless. He was fucking right. That was part of my fear to begin with that they would never make it in Naedis.
“There is also the advantage that your blood is likely mixed with an immortal race. Your natural life span will surpass your sisters and perhaps even rival mine,” he boasted.
People had always said this was the case with me, but I had never given it much thought. Who would want to muse over the fact that they would get to watch the rest of their family grow old and die around them?
Raest took a step closer to me, a possessive grin on his face. “As far as I'm concerned you are the most valuable person here, and
I will have you,” he purred.
At that word, the thought of him having me, it drew back my illness along with a detail crucial to any betrothal.
“But I’m not a…” I stammered.
“A what?” he questioned.
“A virgin!” I spat out.
Raest let out another hearty laugh.
“Do you think Illyd care about such nonsense as that? We are lovers and fighters, doesn’t matter in the slightest who you’ve been with in the past. The only thing that matters to us is the fidelity of the one we are entwined with. If you agree to become mine, then you are mine alone.”
I continued to glare at him. His possessiveness was disgusting. The smile he gave me was almost cruel, the gentleness I had come to know was gone. In a heartbeat he edged closer to me, stalking like a beast. I tried to back away but bumped into the desk behind me. Trapped like a rabbit before a wolf. Raest's pale hand slowly reached up, lifting my chin, forcing me to look him right into his icy eyes. He was so close I could smell him. Jasmine and cinnamon. For a moment I thought he was going to force a kiss onto my lips.
“You are the queen Naedis needs. That I need. You are all I have ever dreamed of and more. Beautiful and fierce as the flame,” he purred, taking a piece of my hair into his other hand. He brought the strand to his nose, taking in my scent. I held back a disgusted shudder. His eyes were no longer cold. Fire danced within.
“There is one more thing. Nyx. Your friend. You must be aware of our involvement,” I scowled.
Darkness fluttered over his features. “While he hasn’t told me directly, I’m certainly not blind. I am confident that he will come to realise this arrangement is the best path for Naedis and Seranel.”
My heart thudded painfully in my chest. Last night really was our last night. I was going to break his heart. I straightened myself, holding my head high inches away from his. I would cower no longer, true queens showed no fear.
“I will do it. I will be your queen.”
Triumph curled onto his face and delight sparkled in his eyes. Victory. He knew I could never say no. How could I ever refuse the demands of an Illyd king?
With the wind in his step, Raest turned and began to make his way to the door, ready to announce his success to the others. Amongst my inner turmoil, one thought, in particular, continued to torment me. I called out to Raest as his fingers brushed the door handle.
“Raest. That person I spent time with, the one who spoke of my mother. That gentle man. Was he just part of your ruse?”
He looked hurt at my accusation, I couldn't tell if it was genuine.
“I kept my intentions from you. There was no ruse. I am many things, Sabyr. I am the gentle man, I am the Illyd king. I am many other faces that you will come to know. Being king means that I don't always get to choose the face I want to wear.”
“Which one am I marrying then?” I laughed mockingly.
“All of them,” he said.
Chapter 20
On their return, my family continued to protest my involvement. But with a coldness of my own, I dismissed them, reaffirming my choice. Nyx stormed out before our arrangement concluded, Ophelia following after him. With a numb mind, I stood beside Raest signing paper after paper, solidifying our betrothal. Scrawling Sabyr Feros onto the last piece of parchment, Raest left us to prepare, his arrogance brimming in every step. Few words were exchanged between my brothers and I before I too, left to prepare. Tomorrow. I would be gone tomorrow, before the sunrise.
My heart and footsteps were heavy as I dragged myself back to my room. I wanted to see Nyx to explain myself and give him some comfort or closure, but I couldn't face him. I had made this choice without even talking to him, and I hated myself for it. But talking to him or not, it wouldn't have mattered in the end; my answer would have been the same.
The sun had set by the time I made it back to my room. Pushing my door open, I expected to walk into darkness, but to my surprise candles were already lit in my room. A man sat on my bed, and my chest twinged as he spoke.
“I didn't know Sabyr. I promise you, I didn't. None of us did. He used to tell us everything.”
“Nyx. You shouldn't be here, how did you get in here?” I sighed as I stepped closer to him.
“The locks aren't hard to pick,” Nyx said flatly.
We sat in silence, staring at each other desperately. I wanted to run to him, to crush myself against him, but I couldn't. I wasn't his anymore.
“Come closer. Don't stand all the way over there like we're strangers now. It's killing me,” he said softly. There was so much pain in his voice.
“I can't. You know I can't now, and I don't trust myself,” I rasped, holding back my tears.
Nyx’s hands scrunched up into fists, his gaze turned away from me. My body began to quake.
“Do you hate me? You should hate me, it will make this so much easier,” I said.
Nyx rose from the bed, storming over to me without hesitation, drawing me into a firm embrace. I crumbled into his arms, holding back my sobs. He cupped my face in one hand, forcing me to look at him.
“I could never hate you, do you understand me? Never! I... I fucking love you!” he roared, his words my undoing as tears streamed from my eyes.
“Don't. Don't say that now. It's too late for that now,” I sobbed.
He shook his head, frantically. “No. I will say it. I fucking love you, and I don't care if you marry him or what happens. I will still say it till the end of time because it's the truth.”
I buried my face into his chest, my tears staining his shirt as I wailed like a baby. I had never cried like this, not even when my mother died.
“I'm so sorry, Nyx. I made a promise to you that I can't keep,” I bawled.
His grip around me tightened, it was almost painful.
“I'm who's sorry. Raest should have told me. Why didn't he tell me? I could have stayed away or convinced him to fuck off,” Nyx growled.
I raised my head to look at him, I just had to savour this closeness one more time, and before I could pull away, he began to pepper my face with kisses. His mouth ran over my tears, eventually finding their way to my lips. I didn't hold back as we tasted each other—salt and sweetness all at once. I never wanted to forget this.
“You don't have to do this,” he breathed between our heated kisses. “Come with me. Fuck the lot of them. We can go anywhere we want. We can be together,” Nyx continued.
I planted a long kiss onto his lips, drawing it out until I was ready to speak.
“I want to more than anything. But I can't. If we do that I jeopardise my family and my people. I couldn't live with myself.”
Rage tore across his face as he continued to spit words at me. “Fuck them! Half of your people treat you like a freak, and all you do is work for your siblings! What about you? What about your dreams?! Our dreams!”
“None of that matters. I can't abandon them! I know it's hard for you to understand, you haven't had my position, you haven't had a family like mine,” I growled.
As the words left my mouth, the rage on his face cooled into worse emotions. Disappointment. Disgust. My heart lurched as Nyx took in a deep breath and stepped back.
“I don't matter?” he said, his voice quaking.
“You know I don't mean it like that!” I pleaded as I tried to close the distance.
“Do I Sabyr?” He yelled, backing away further while shaking his head madly. He paused near the door, a snarl on his face. “Though I guess you're right about one thing. A silly orphan, a commoner like me, would never understand what it's like to be you,” he hissed.
“Nyx please!” I begged.
“But you know what Sabyr?! I wanted us to be family!”
It was almost as if I could hear my heart crack inside me. I fought back another bout of tears and stormed up to Nyx. Reaching out, I brushed his cheek tenderly and whispered, “In another life.”
This brought no comfort. He looked angrier, so hurt, so lost. He snatched my hand
, and forcefully pulled it from his face. His grip was tight and painful.
“Don't patronise me,” he breathed, shaking with fury.
I was a monster. Nyx backed up to the doors placing a hand on the handle.
“This is it then. I should leave you to pack for your betrothed.”
“We will still be living together under the same roof. I want to be friends, Nyx,” I managed to choke out.
Nyx’s fingers dug into the metal. “I'll always be there for you. But I don't know if I can do that yet. Goodnight Sabyr.” And he was gone.
Chapter 21
Through my pathetic sobbing, I packed the few belongings I had to take with me and soon after fell into a restless sleep. My mind wouldn't let me rest. Images of Nyx, my family, and the life I had been imagining, tormented me throughout the night. I barely slept, and it wasn't long before Kero was knocking at my door. It was time to go.
Dressed in a thick coat and carrying a single bag, Kero and I made our way to the front courtyard where Raest's carriage awaited. Kero hadn't said a word since he had fetched me, but as we neared our destination, he finally spoke.
“I never thought this day would come,” Kero mumbled, slowing his pace to draw out the time we had left together.
“You and me both,” I said flatly, easing my pace to his.
“I know you said you didn't want any of us to come with you, but please let me. I'm so scared for you Sabyr. This whole time we thought we had it all figured out and then they do this?! Wickam was right. We should have never trusted the bloody Illyd,” he spat.
I stopped, reaching out to grab him, we were getting far too close to dangerous ears. “Raest did this. Not the Illyd, don't blame all of them. None of you can come with me. It's far too dangerous, and I can't trust Raest after what happened.”
Kero grabbed my arm in return, his face darkening.
“I'll be alright, Kero. Even after what he did, what reason does he have to hurt me now? He has what he wants. Besides, Nyx will be around. I know he won't let anything happen to me,” I soothed.