by Vella Wolf
My mouth moved before my mind caught up. “Would?”
Ora’s face paled as she mumbled back to me, “He has been gone, for many years now…”
I gulped at my foolishness and watched as a shadow was cast across the room. The cheer dulled, eyes dropped, and sombre expressions were shared between the women. In a brief panic, I reached out my hand to Ora offering some comfort, anything to stop seeing the pain on her face. She took it with an honest smile, her skin as hot as flame and I mumbled out an apology.
“Ora I am so sorry. I forget the history of this place.”
Ora squeezed my hand affectionately before letting go.
“No, it is all right, it is my fault. I am putting a damper on your party. Let us change the subject!” Ora hummed in her indecision before finding a question that made me squirm. “Ah, I know! How many children are you planning?” she giggled, and the laughter returned to the room. I groaned not hiding an ounce of my discomfort.
“Not you lot too,” I whined, reaching for some of Fye’s spirits.
Ora continued to laugh, “I didn’t mean right now, no hassles I promise. Just in the future. You must have thought about it.”
I stared into a glass of spirits, its colours swirling red and yellow, and at last, I shook my head. “A few days ago, I never even imagined I would be married, let alone thought about children. I think I was always afraid of bringing more life into such a dangerous, painful, and imperfect world.”
Something like sympathy came over the faces in the room, and when words failed to follow, I worried that I had said the wrong thing. My worries began to stumble out. “Sorry. It is probably silly, and after all, children are necessary in my position now,” I babbled, adjusting my cloak to smother the feeling of exposure. I wanted to run, and as I almost excused myself, a stern voice spoke.
“No. It is not silly. You are not alone in your concern,” Verona said with a nod.
Fye smiled a toothy but comforting grin, “I worried before, and I worry now. My family is lucky, not so much grief as others. I try to remember, life is filled with joy as well as sadness. When I see my cubs joyous and well, my fears are dispelled.”
Yet another sad smile brushed Ora’s lips, her look was empathy, not sympathy, a mother then too? No words followed her gentle nod of agreement.
The night rolled onto lighter conversation, and the drink and laughter flowed into the early hours of the morn. I yawned deeply as I continued to listen to the banter. Thank Arndell, it was a late wedding. Ora finally called a night end, and the five of us exited the parlour. Ora caught me in a hug, kissing me on either cheek before whispering her excitement about seeing my dress tomorrow. With a wink, she left for her room. A soft paw was placed on my head, ruffling my hair affectionately, and Fye moved to my side.
“Sabyr, could I have word before you rest?” she smiled. I nodded. Together, we moved a distance from Ophelia and Verona, Fye insisting to them that we would be but a moment.
Fye placed a warm paw on my shoulder and began to speak firmly. “Sabyr, I will be blunt, do not be alarmed. I know you are uneasy, natural, but Ora, myself, the others, we don’t see you as broodmother for Raest. You do not need to watch words with us, you do not need to be frightened. You are family now and with it comes protection and support.”
I kept my face composed, but my eyes began to sting as she continued. “What happened, what will happen, we are not ignorant to these matters, and we understand how difficult everything is and will be. The courts, the bureaucracy, filled with snakes! But us, the circle, we are family, and together we are strong. If you ever need anything, even if it is advice, support, or some space, we are here for you. I trust Raest will take care of you, but still, offer is always there.”
As soon as she finished, I managed to stifle a sob, and in seconds she pulled me into a bear hug. We pulled away, and she brushed the tip of my chin, “Chin up, tomorrow will be hard but better than you expect,” she whispered to me, and with that she turned, leaving for her room.
Wrapping the cloak around myself, I moved in the direction of the stairwell, a voice calling behind me.
“Wait!” Ophelia called, the two running to catch up. I had hoped they had left. I swivelled to face them, their faces visibly uncomfortable, and we stood together awkwardly.
“Can we… walk you to your room,” Verona asked stiffly. I nodded in agreement, turning heel with both in tow. Not a word was spoken as we walked to my room. I mumbled a thank you and goodnight as I placed my hand on the handle.
“Stop! I am… sorry,” Ophelia spat out as I took a step into my room. I sighed and motioned them in, shutting the door behind us quietly. Ophelia continued to spill, “I... We haven't been a good friend to you. We should have spoken to you after Raest made his choice, but neither of us knew what to say. I still don't know what to say.”
She grasped a strand of her lavender hair, curling it around her finger anxiously. “I was angry at Raest, angry at you, even though it wasn't your fault, and that was wrong. I can't even begin to imagine what you thought like everything was a set up.” Her ocean eyes flashed with a mixture of rage and sincerity, “Sabyr, I didn't know his intentions, none of us did, and for that, I am sorry.”
I gave her a weak but apologetic smile, “Hearing that is an utter relief, I saw the surprise on your faces, but there was doubt,” I said softly.
Verona’s face curled into something like shame, another rare emotion from her. “He… He watched you. Often. From that, I should have known, but I trusted him to tell us. He is different. Everything is different,” she muttered.
We stood in silence, her words invoking fear and tension in us all.
“I am sure he had his reasons, and he will explain in due time,” Ophelia affirmed. Confidence for herself or us? She continued. “I want us to be friends. Can you forgive us?”
I smiled at her warm and honest, “There is nothing to forgive. Friends,” I said, offering a hand of peace. My hand was ignored as I was crushed between the two.
“Everything will be better from now on. I am sure of it,” Ophelia said, as she let me go.
Sleep called to us all, and with another set of good nights, I opened my door for them. They waved and began to walk away but a nagging sickness inside me, forced out a call to them.
“Wait. I need you to do something. Keep an eye on Nyx for me. I don't know if he will ever speak to me again and I worry, beyond words.” I felt a rush of guilt and shame. Their faces shared my pain.
“Say no more,” Ophelia mouthed to me, a hand over her heart in promise.
Chapter 24
My eyes stung as Eed ripped open the curtains revealing the midday sun. I had long slept in, and the wedding was in just four hours. As was tradition, we would be wed at dusk, which in this place was right around four o'clock. Pulling me from my bed, Eed pushed me into the bath. I sheepishly bathed as Eed washed and combed my hair. She was in a fiery mood, and I hadn't the stamina to argue with her. But just as before, her touch was gentle, and as she brushed my hair, she mumbled about the pretty colour, the first and probably last compliment I'd get from her.
My mind felt numb and sore, half the alcohol, half the dread, nothing felt real. The reality of it didn't set in even when my wedding dress was hung before me. I sat before it, in nothing but Ora's lace and I stared. It was beautiful, it was unique like someone had sewn shadows and mist together. Eed informed me that Ora and Fye had selected it and honestly, it was perfect. The bodice was a black silk-like corset, delicate silver and black beading ran over the bust trailing down the sides of the ribboned back. The skirt flared out from where the corset sat, multiple layers of tulle, black, midnight blue, and misty grey. They cascaded down spilling over the floor, the back running into a train. I reached to touch the skirt, to be certain it was real. I could almost see the smoke and shadows dancing.
Eed and two other servants helped to dress me in its splendour and together they worked their magic. The back of my hair was left down b
ut my fringe pinned back, my brow left empty for a purpose. The sides were pulled back in four different strands and woven delicately, clasped with an ornate clip. I held my face still and stern as they painted my eyes dark and smoky. Light, silver blush was dusted on my cheeks while my lips were left to their natural red. A long, tiered necklace was hung around my neck, the black and silver gems glittered in the light. To my relief, merciful Eed presented me with a pair of black silk slippers. The dress was long enough to hide my feet, she said. The final piece came, a long veil the colour of dusk draped over my face and hair.
At last, my attire was complete, and the servants pulled back to admire their handy work. I stared at myself in the mirror, it was barely me anymore. “Beautiful,” Eed muttered, and for once I agreed. I did look beautiful. Butterflies filled my stomach. The reality was setting in.
The sound of bells and chimes filled the air, the hour of my wedding drew near. Ora and Ophelia came to escort me, both wearing matching dark grey gowns, my bridesmaids I guessed. It should have been my sisters. They cooed over me before passing me a bouquet of night lilies. My hands clasped the ribbon tightly, and together we made our way to the garden. Before the garden, the dining hall had been transformed into a sort of waiting room for the bridal party. Eed and a few other servants waited to assist while guards stood watch. Esu and Verona sat on a bench, both waving as we approached. Today Esu wore a set of silver threaded black robes while Verona wore dark suit pants, a shirt, and a vest. She was stunningly handsome.
After wishing me luck, Verona left to take her seat up front, exiting out the side door. I could see the enormous crowd as she left. I wished I could have Ora's wedding. The light outside began to dull, and the sickly sweet wedding tune grew louder. As soon as the sun started to dip below the earth, the ceremony would begin. Ophelia first, then Ora and finally I would be left to walk down the aisle alone. I wished my father were here, or Elren or Kero, or anyone to help me through this.
“I should take my seat too! It is almost time,” Esu said happily, and he began to make his exit.
In a flash I ran to him, clasping my hand around his arm, visibly shaking. He looked at me, confused as my eyes pleaded.
“Esu. This probably isn't proper but please, walk with me. Please don't let me walk alone,” I begged. His expression changed to pity, and he took my hand.
“It would be my pleasure,” he said gently, escorting me back to my place.
Music roared in my ears. Dusk was upon us. The doors were pulled open, revealing a long dark runner, and at the change of the melody, Ophelia took her first step. Once halfway down the runner, Ora began to follow, the music started to build. I couldn't stop my hands from shaking. Esu squeezed my hand to try to soothe me. Ora passed the same point, and the music reached its peak. Esu moved to link our arms, and with a gentle tug, we began to walk down the aisle.
The crisp, twilight air hit my skin as soon as I stepped out under the starry sky. All eyes turned to me, the grounds filled with seated nobles atop ribboned chairs. Away from the nobles, the common folk filled every space possible. Dragil, Lamia, Ashmere, Vulpin, every colourful Illyd race lay before me.
I passed the halfway mark, the aisle opened up, the gazebo stood tall. Fye stood at the podium dressed in a smoky robe. Raest stood before her. The diadem once again sat atop his brow, his hair let loose and long. His dress robes were the grandest set yet, its colours matching those of my gown. The umbral moon sigil sat on a strip of his bare chest. Our eyes met, and he beamed the biggest smile. He looked as if this was the happiest day of his life.
The glow of the sun behind the gazebo began to fade as I took my steps up onto the platform. Inch by inch, Esu took me to my future husband. Raest, so tall, so giant, loomed before me. The smell of jasmine and frost in the air. Esu broke our bond with a gentle touch, took my bouquet, and placed my hand in Raest’s, the touch like needles pressing into my skin. On either side of us, chairs sat for our circle, and to my horror, all chairs were filled. Nyx was here with everyone else. I didn't think he would come, I hoped he wouldn’t. Perhaps he didn't have a choice. The sunlight was gone, and with a click of Raest's fingers, every candelabra lit up with a blue flame.
“Welcome one and all!” Fye began. “We are gathered here for momentous occasion. Not only will our dear king wed and new queen rise, this union signifies our alliance and bright future with Seranel.” A few cheers burst from the crowd. “I am proud to see so many here today. Your ancestors would be overjoyed,” she continued her greeting, pulling an old, dusky book from the podium.
Licking a padded digit, Fye flicked through its pages. “Irir vos valdune,” Fye called in what I assumed was Illyr. Many of the people in the crowd bowed their heads and closed their eyes and what followed was more Illyr from Fye’s tongue. A prayer or an ode. I couldn't understand a word of it. It went on for what seemed like forever, the whole time I was painfully aware of Raest's burning gaze. My eyes had barely left our paired hands.
“Now, the vows!” Fye boomed. Ophelia rose from her seat presenting two small velvet boxes. Fye took each, placing one on the podium and opening the other. The ring, my ring. In the centre of the piece silver metal flared out creating five petals matching the night lily in design, a violet gem sat within the bud. On either side of the bloom black and silver twisted and curled like vines or tendrils, completing the band. It was as beautiful as it was menacing.
My hands were released as Raest took the ring. His fingers grazed my jawline, drawing my eyes up to his. Warmth and worry swirled in his icy eyes. He recaptured my left hand, placing the ring before my fingertip. Raest's vows would be from Naedis, mine from Seranel.
“In darkness and in light, I will be your sword and your shield. I will be your warmth in the cold, the flame within your heart. Through life, sickness and the beyond we will be as one. Death, never our undoing. I am yours for all time,” Raest vowed, his tone painfully genuine. With the last word, the ring was slipped onto my finger. The perfect fit.
I took the next box, pulling open the lid to reveal a simple band. Black and silver metal was warped around each other, just like mine, but there were no petals. A small violet stone sat in the piece. I took the ring and brought his hand forward, my eyes rising to his once more. I prayed for my voice, not to falter.
“Through forests and wealds, I will run with you. I will shelter your body beneath my embrace and nourish your soul with my heart. If hungry, I will hunt for you. If sadness grips you, I will raise you up. And, if you are dying, then I too will die with you. May all our days be blessed until we return back to the earth.” Taking in a deep breath, I gently slid the ring onto his pale fingers. The pact was made.
“Wonderful! Wonderful!” Fye roared and cheering erupted through the crowd. A larger, final box was brought to the podium. Lifting the velvet lid, Fye revealed a matching diadem to Raest's. She brought it to my brow, fastening it around my crown. The weight, its burden, so heavy.
“I now pronounce you husband and wife, king and queen! You may now come together as one,” Fye announced.
A hand was placed around my waist, the other rested on my cheek. Raest drew me in, his eyes, joyous and hungry. He brought his face down to mine, a thumb ran over my bottom lip, and gently he pressed his lips to mine. The kiss was long and drawn out, I could barely breathe as his intensity grew, his body crushing against mine. The roar of the crowd rang in my ears, and all I could think, all I could wish was that Nyx wasn't watching. Finally, he broke the kiss, his fingers trailing down my face affectionately. The music began to play again as he led me from the gazebo towards the entrance hall, the venue for our reception.
Atop the stage in the hall, Raest and I sat upon matching thrones, the circle members filled seats either side. One seat lay empty. Nyx had disappeared just after the ceremony. Good. The hall was filled with food, drink, and merriment. One by one, the important lords and ladies of the land came to greet and pay favour to us. The pile of gifts growing at an alarming rate.
> A pair of Ashmere twins stepped forward to greet us, both young in appearance. To my surprise, they were announced as Risa and Lashan Laefluer, the rulers of the Hallon province. Both loyal to the crown, and it showed. They spoke warmly to Raest and I, offering several wrapped gifts. Both insisted on us visiting their city by the sea as some sort of belated honeymoon. I had already been told Raest was too busy for that any time soon and I was relieved. With a respectful bow, the two left to mingle, allowing the next guest through. An old, scarred, green-scaled Dragil rose to the stage, offering a simple nod as greeting. The Dragil was announced as Xann Kvast, the ruler of the Vokdelar province. The tentative ally. He offered a few gifts and even less conversation before returning to the crowd. Ora informed me that he was always grumpy and not to take it personally.
Food and drink I had never seen before were offered throughout the night, but I ate little. Dread and sadness could not be shaken off. I had barely spoken a word to Raest since we arrived, he was far too busy conversing with the nobility. Thankfully Fye sat to my left, occasionally offering banter and insight about those presented to us. Many mentions of affairs and scandals, to no surprise the nobility here was as bad as Seranel's. She made a habit to point out anyone she liked and more so anyone who had a promising mate for her kittens.
Fye made it clear that she wasn't so fond of the Dragil, complaining that they all thought themselves superior. Circae had only successfully created one dragon in his time, the Dragil were leftover attempts. The fact they were potential dragons made many of them cocky and prideful.
“Who takes pride in being reject, huh?” She said as she clicked her tongue in annoyance.