by K. Street
A snapshot of the past that made it hard to breathe in the present. And I wanted to fucking breathe.
I pressed my forehead to the cool metal surface. One hand went to the magnet while the other went to the corner of the photograph. I lifted my head and slid the magnet away, gripping the picture between my thumb and forefinger, and then I lowered myself onto one of the chairs and stared at the image.
After several long minutes, I stood from the chair and strode into my bedroom, closing the door behind me. My bare feet sank into the carpet as I crossed the room and discarded the picture on the mattress. Then, I made my way over to the small walk-in closet. I already felt it—the pain that I knew would hurt like hell. Acid dripped into a wound that had yet to fully heal. I stretched my arms over my head to grasp a box on the top shelf.
Grief gripped my insides as I carried it to the bed, sat, and removed the lid. Dani’s delicate handwriting stared back at me.
The Rules …
Make her feel loved every single day.
Raise her to be a good human.
Don’t let her grow up to be an entitled brat.
Read her bedtime stories and teach her the big words.
Remind her that everybody falls; it’s how you rise that matters.
Let her be her own person.
Believe in her, especially when she doesn’t believe in herself.
Push her out of her comfort zone a little, so she’ll learn to embrace life.
Tell her how much I loved her.
As for you, Tucker … live well. Live for those of us who don’t have the chance.
One more rule had been scrawled at the bottom. My eyes purposely shifted from it without bothering to read the words. I knew what it said, and it was her one request I wasn’t sure I could grant.
The words floated on the page. My eyes shifted to the contents of the open box. On top lay a picture of the six of us—Griffin, Holly, Nash, Macy, Dani, and me. The snapshot had been taken when we were in high school, during a beach bonfire. It was a lifetime ago, but I remembered it well. I smiled despite the way my chest constricted. Setting aside the paper, I reached inside for the photo. We were young and ignorant to how cruel the world could be. Back then … life had been full of possibilities. Never in a million years had I thought it would play out like this.
I picked up the image of me, Dani, and Shayne and held it next to the one of the six of us. Side by side, I stared at the faces frozen in time. Nobody would classify what I’d done over the last four years as living. One day had faded into the next while I just tried to make it through. I took care of my daughter, looked after my mom, and kept the business running. I existed and did what needed to be done, but it wasn’t living. Not really.
Live.
The word clanked inside my head. Pinged and ricocheted like the ball from an old arcade game.
Live.
I felt it take root.
Live.
I put the contents back in the box, added the photo from the fridge, secured the lid, and returned it to the closet. Then, I went in search of my phone. There it was, sitting on top of the dresser, where I’d left it before I gave Shayne a bath. I opened the screen and searched my Contacts for Camryn’s name.
Live.
Me: So, next Saturday …
I didn’t expect her to text back. Despite the late hour, the little dots jumped on the screen.
Camryn: Tucker?
Me: Who did you think it was?
Camryn: Are you having second thoughts?
Me: Definitely not.
Camryn: So, like a date?
Me: No. Not like a date. It is a date.
Camryn: Are you still going to feed me?
Her response brought a smile to my face.
Me: Yes.
Camryn: Do I need to dress up?
Me: That’s up to you.
Camryn: Can I wear yoga pants?
The question conjured up an image of her perfect ass. My dick twitched. We’d never make it to dinner.
Me: Not a chance.
Camryn: So … it really is a date.
Me: Yes.
16
Camryn
I’d been looking forward to my date with Tucker all week long, and by the time Saturday rolled around, my nerves had started to get the best of me. Tucker would be here in less than thirty minutes, and it wasn’t like he had far to walk. Hopefully, he wasn’t one of those people who arrived fifteen minutes early for everything. People like that made me crazy. Mainly because I wanted to be one of them. Of the character traits I possessed, timeliness didn’t make the list. I could leave the house an hour before necessary and still be five minutes late.
The metal plates of the straightener clamped together as I positioned the iron over the last section of my hair. Slowly, I glided it down the length of my hair. Mouth twisted, I took in my long raven locks, toying with which side to let it fall on, the silky warm strands cascading between my fingers. Happy with the way it looked, I shut off the iron and started working on my makeup.
I considered myself a minimalist when it came to beauty products. My face was bare unless I was working, and on those days, I wore mascara, a little bit of blush, and lip gloss. Tonight though … I wanted to look sexy. I took my time with applying eyeliner, shadow, and lip liner in addition to what I normally wore to work.
Finished, I stepped back and studied my reflection in the full-length mirror on the back of the bathroom door.
I wore a white cami underneath a cobalt-blue sheer blouse, paired with black skinny jeans and black peep-toe flats. This particular shade of blue made my eyes pop, and the eyeliner made it even more dramatic.
Just as I finished finger-combing through my hair one last time, a loud knock sounded from the living room. My heart rate accelerated. I’d had butterflies before, but these weren’t butterflies as much as a flock of pterodactyls ready to take flight in my stomach.
Twack. Twack. Twack. The thuds came in quick succession.
“Coming,” I called out and headed toward the door. “It’s just Tucker,” I reminded myself.
He’d pretty much seen me at my worst already, given our initial encounter and the night I cried in his arms. After that, I had nowhere to go but up. My fingers twisted the knob, and I drew in a calming breath before opening it.
Tucker stood on my porch, dressed in a black button-down shirt that looked custom made for his body. Clad in a pair of well-worn jeans distressed to perfection. Beard neatly trimmed. Sexy smirk in place.
“Hi,” I said.
“Hi.” Hazel irises roamed over my body before they made a slow return to my face. “Damn. You look beautiful.”
He leaned down to plant a kiss on my cheek. Rough whiskers grazed my skin, causing the blood to hum in my veins. A hint of spice, citrus, and cedar filled my nose. The scent uniquely Tucker.
“You look nice, too.” Nice didn’t even begin to cover it. He was the sexiest man I’d ever laid eyes on.
“Ready to go?” he asked.
“Just let me grab my purse.” I ambled to the makeshift coffee table, picked it up, and locked the door on my way out.
Tucker led the way to his truck and opened my door. He waited for me to climb in before he shut it and went around to the other side.
As we backed out of the driveway, I turned to him. “Is Shayne at your mom’s?”
“Yeah. Mom keeps her overnight once or twice a month.”
“That’s nice. I’m sure it’s not easy, doing it all on your own.”
Tucker glanced at me with an expression I couldn’t read before shifting his eyes back to the road.
“When I was growing up, it was just me and my dad,” I explained. “Shayne and I have that in common.”
Tucker nodded in understanding. “It is hard. I’m not going to pretend it isn’t.”
“Well … for what it’s worth, I think you’re doing a phenomenal job.”
“I appreciate that.” After a beat, he asked, “Are you still cl
ose to your dad?”
I stared out the window, trying to keep my emotions in check. “We used to be … he passed six months ago.”
“I’m sorry.” His hand closed the space between us, reaching for mine. He lightly squeezed it before placing his back on the wheel.
“It’s crazy. I still pick up the phone to call him, and midway through dialing his number, I remember he’s not here. I’m a grown woman, but sometimes, I’m still that little girl who misses her dad.” I blinked back the unshed tears. “I’m so sorry. This isn’t really first-date conversation.”
“Camryn, there aren’t any rules. It’s just you and me.”
“Tell me about your family,” I prodded him, ready to have the attention off me.
“There isn’t much to tell. Most of my extended family have either passed or moved away from here. It’s just me, Mom, and Bug.” A shadow crossed his face and then disappeared just as fast. “Nash and Macy are family, but we’re not actually related.”
“Wait. Macy? Does she work at Jaxson Realty?”
“Yep.” He smirked.
“When Shayne mentioned an Aunt Macy, I didn’t realize it was one in the same.”
“We grew up together.”
“It really is a small world.”
“Tell me about your mom,” Tucker said.
I had no way of knowing if Shayne had brought up our conversation, so I decided to lay it out. “The other day, while you worked on the car, Shayne asked me about her. When I said I didn’t have a mom, it sort of led down a winding road.”
“She mentioned that your mom left. What happened?”
My eyes shifted out the window.
“You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to.”
“The topic of my mom is kind of a sore spot.” I’d had years to accept the fact that she didn’t love us enough to stick around. As I’d gotten older, I understood her actions reflected her character, not mine. Regardless, as much as I liked to pretend it didn’t bother me, the effects of her abandonment were long reaching. I cleared my throat. “She left when I was three. Decided that family life wasn’t for her and took off. I haven’t seen her since.”
“I’m sorry …”
“Don’t be. It’s life. You don’t get to choose your hand, but you can decide how to play the cards.”
“You’re pretty amazing, you know that.” It was a statement not a question.
I shook my head. “Not really. Dwelling on it won’t change the situation. Hating her would give her power.”
“If I can do half the job with Bug that your dad did with you, I’ll have raised one hell of a kid.”
“I think that is one of the best compliments I’ve ever been given, thank you. And, for the record, you already are.”
We’d been driving for about twenty minutes when Tucker pulled into the parking lot of a restaurant.
“Don’t move,” he ordered as he shut off the truck and got out. His gentlemanly ways were sexy as hell.
I waited for him to come around to open my door. When he did, he offered me his hand. Once I was safely on the ground, he gently tugged me closer, dipped his head low, and tenderly brushed his lips over mine. Then, Tucker reached into the truck to get my purse off the seat, gave it to me, and shut the door.
“Thank you,” I said as I fell into step beside him.
He placed his palm on the small of my back and guided me through the open door to the host stand.
“Welcome to Driftwood Landing,” a young man greeted us.
“Reservation for Jaxson,” Tucker informed him.
“Of course, sir.”
The podium had a built-in screen, and the host’s eyes sifted through the list. After he located the reservation, he gestured to the girl standing beside him. Her smile was friendly.
“Brittany will show you to your table.”
“Right this way,” she said.
The heat from his hand radiated through mine as we followed behind her through the restaurant to an outdoor deck. Tucker pulled out my chair, and waited until I sat, before taking his seat. He was charming, considerate, and sweet. I bit my lip to keep from laughing at the thought.
Sweet.
Six foot three, all broad shoulders, calloused hands, and chiseled man from head to toe. Sweet certainly wasn’t the most suitable adjective for a man like Tucker Jaxson.
“May I get you something to drink while you wait?” Brittany asked as she placed a menu in front of each of us.
“Yes, please. I’ll have water with lime,” I said.
“And for you, sir?”
“Sam Adams, please.”
“I’ll be right back with those.”
Our table overlooked the water, offering a spectacular view of the sun that had just begun to set. Shades of pink and orange swept brilliantly across the sky, making it seem more like a painting than real life.
Salty sea air filled my lungs as I drew in a breath and then released it on a sigh. “This view is absolutely breathtaking.”
“It certainly is.”
I glanced at Tucker, but his eyes weren’t taking in our surroundings. He was staring at me.
“You really do look beautiful,” he complimented.
“Thank you,” I said shyly.
The intensity of his gaze ignited a warmth between my legs.
“Pardon me for the intrusion,” a woman said as she set our drinks on the table. “I’m Marisol, and I’ll be taking care of you this evening.” Her smile was warm and friendly. “Have you had a chance to look at the menu, or do you need a few minutes?” she asked, her finger pushing the glasses higher on her nose.
“Good evening.” Tucker smiled at her and then added, “We’d like a few minutes if you don’t mind.”
“Of course. I’ll be back to check on you shortly.”
He opened his menu, and I followed suit.
“Since I’ve never been here, what’s good?”
“Do you like seafood? The sea scallops are really good.”
“That sounds amazing.” I closed my menu and placed it back on the table.
A few minutes later, Marisol returned with a small basket of artisan bread and two small plates. Since we were ready, she took our order.
After she left, I studied Tucker. “Can I ask you something?”
“Sure.”
“Will you tell me about Shayne’s mom?”
He stared out at the horizon for so long, I wasn’t sure he’d answer.
“Her name was Dani. We got married when she was eight months pregnant with Shayne.”
“How long has she been …” The words hung in the air as my voice trailed off.
“She died when Bug was a little over a year old.”
The look on his face made me wish I hadn’t asked.
“Tucker, I’m so sorry.”
“It’s okay. It was a long time ago.”
“How did you meet?”
He picked up his beer, sat back in his chair, and lifted the bottle to his lips, taking a long pull before answering, “I’d known her practically my whole life. She moved to Jaxson Cove when she was seven to live with her grandparents. Her mom and dad had been killed in a plane crash.”
“Oh my God. That’s horrible.”
“It was. She had a rough go of it for a long time.”
I reached for a piece of bread. “So, were you two, like, high school sweethearts?”
A strange look crossed his face. Slightly amused and a little bit wistful. “No, actually, we weren’t.” His eyes met mine, and he opened his mouth but closed it again when Marisol returned with our entrees.
“Who gets the sea scallops?”
Tucker pointed to me.
“Be careful; the plate is warm,” she warned as she set it in front of me. “This must be yours.” She smiled and placed the other plate in front of Tucker.
He’d opted for the New York strip steak.
“Everything look okay?”
“Yes, thank you,” Tucker replied.
I watched as Tucker cut into his steak. Then, he speared it on his fork before he lifted it to his lips and put it in his mouth. I wanted to feel those lips on mine again.
“Camryn?”
“Mmhmm?” My tongue swiped across my bottom lip.
“Camryn.”
My face flushed with heat. I took a drink of my water, suddenly wishing I’d ordered something stronger. “Yes?”
“You should eat before it gets cold,” he said with a smirk.
“Right.” I picked up my fork, cut a scallop in half, stuck it in my mouth, and attempted to cover my embarrassment.
17
Tucker
Between the setting sun and the clear lights strung around the deck, I was able to see the flush of Camryn’s cheeks. She was so fucking adorable.
“Do you want a bite?” I gestured toward my plate.
“Sharing food … isn’t that more like a second-date sort of thing?”
“Already trying to get me to go out with you again?” I chuckled.
She pointed her fork at me. “You should really work on your self-esteem.”
She laughed a full belly laugh, and I knew I was screwed. When it came to this woman, I was so fucking screwed.
She stole a piece of steak from my plate, and since I wasn’t about to let her get one over on me, I stabbed one of her scallops and popped it into my mouth.
The conversation was light and easy as we finished our meal. We ordered a slice of key lime pie to share for dessert. After the check was paid and I left a generous tip, we took the steps that led from the deck down onto the beach. Camryn slipped out of her shoes and carried them in her hand.
We walked along the shoreline for a few minutes before I broke the silence. “Tell me about Jared.”