Jasper needed understanding. He didn’t need to be shoved aside.
I felt bad and Leif grabbed my hand.
I couldn’t imagine how Jasper managed to do everything in secret for a year, like looking at lady’s fashion websites or not telling mum and dad about who he was. That really explained why he was so emotional and scared, jerky and dismissive, and abusive towards me.
I was the only one he could lash out at.
He was discovering himself, after all.
“I’m glad you’ve started to find yourself,” I offered, sitting next to him, bringing my other arm around him to show my support and to comfort him. Which was true. That’s how I felt. If my brother was genderfluid, non-binary, or only wanted to wear girls’ clothing, I was okay with that because it was about him and who he wanted to be. It wasn’t about me.
Thinking about that, I realized I didn’t know if Jasper wanted all of us to use “they” or “he,” or even to be called “brother” or “son” for that matter?
I added, “And how did you want me to refer to you, Jasper?”
He shifted around so he could look at me. Jasper had the same colour eyes as I did: steel grey with flecks of hazel. For the first time in ages, his face was gentle, like a weight had been lifted off him. Which it had, I knew. That’s how I felt when I told everyone who I was. His shoulders were no longer slumped, either. “What do you mean?”
“Well…do you want me to call you my brother or would you prefer my sibling? Or something else? And should I use ‘he’ or ‘they’ to address you, Jasper?”
He pressed his lips together, obviously in thought. “I’m still working things out…so having you call me your brother and being a he for now is fine.”
Dad came to life. “I think I’ll go watch…” And he trailed off as he went into the loungeroom, cookies in hand.
I felt for my dad. He was someone who’s world had been turned upside down lately because of his sons.
But at least we all loved him.
Mum said, “My two boys are so beautiful.” She was beaming a smile, tears of joy glittering in her eyes and down her cheeks. She didn’t wipe her emotions away.
Jasper rested his head against mine. “I’m sorry I was such a jerk, Lyle.”
It was nice to be close to him. Very nice. We felt like a complete family again. I breathed in his scent. Jasper was wearing perfume—one of mum’s, if I wasn’t mistaken. That’s why the bathroom smelt of her perfume. Jasper had put it on. I loved it on him.
“I understand now,” I said. “But you could have told me.”
Jasper admitted, “I was really scared and…”
“Someone’s beating you up for being different, aren’t they?” Leif asked.
Jasper nodded, his eyes misting.
Mum’s brow furrowed. “I shall certainly be talking to the principal about that tomorrow.” She needed to get a hotline to his office, she’d been calling him that much recently.
Which bought me on to my next question. “Who’s bullying you, Jasper?” Although, I had a pretty good idea. As Leif would say, there would be no prizes for guessing. And I should have guessed earlier. Yet something still didn’t seem right, and I couldn’t put my finger on it.
Jasper made a strangled noise in his throat.
Leif piped up again, verbalising my suspicions. “It’s Owen and Joe, isn’t it?”
That’s what I had thought. Especially since we overheard Owen and Woeful Joe talking about a cross-dresser before Britney came over and told us about her exploding pom poms and the cut-out letters that had been stolen. God, why hadn’t I put two and two together before? I felt bad. Worse than bad. I felt guilty again, and I hated that. I should have been there for Jasper so I could protect him earlier.
I’d been the jerk.
Because yes, Jasper was the only person I knew of who wore girls’ things under his school uniform. That’s not to say there weren’t any others, though. But it being Jasper made sense, especially after that second ransom note.
And I needed sense right now.
More questions mingled and formed in my mind. To be freed from some of them, I had to ask, “But how did Owen know about you in the first place, Jasper?”
Leif sat up, distracting me. He began shivering, holding himself after he let me go. Being covered in only a coat after the heat from the shower had dissipated from his skin was no doubt the cause.
Before Jasper could answer the question, Dad, with perfect timing and consideration, returned with Leif’s pyjamas in hand. Leif took them with eagerness and plenty of thanks before standing.
Much to my delight, the coat didn’t stay where it was supposed to for long. Gosh, he had a cute little butt, that’s for sure. Thankfully, everyone else turned their heads away as he clambered into his pyjamas without so much as a bat of his eyelids. Not me, though. I enjoyed staring at Leif’s nakedness and was sad to see him covered again. He really did have a great body I wanted to explore more.
Although, Jasper must have caught a glimpse of Leif, because his cheeks turned as pink as his lovely new cat motif pyjamas.
I smiled.
Jasper had a lot more discovering to do, including who he was attracted to, if anyone. And if the person who caught Jasper’s eye so happened to be a boy or a girl or neither, I was happy for him either way.
Being yourself was the most important thing in the world.
When we were all settled again, Dad had flicked on the kettle and we called out what hot drinks we all wanted.
I needed a cup of tea.
Jasper then answered the question that had been hanging in the air like a demon waiting to be exorcised. “I overheard Owen talking to his best friend in the boys’ toilet a few days ago. He was laughing and carrying on. But I made a noise when I caught my arm on the p-paper dispenser. He p-peered over the c-cubicle to…to see who was…l-listening.” Jasper’s voice broke and stuttered the more he recalled the incident.
I grabbed Leif’s hand. He sat down, snuggling close.
“Then what happened?” Leif asked. Mum had put her hand onto Jasper’s arm, too. He nodded, understanding that we were there for him. That we’d always been there for him.
Jasper continued after composing himself. “He…he saw me in my pink undershirt Mum bought me…and…then he be-began t-threatening me.”
“It’s called a camisole, honey,” Mum corrected him like how I corrected Leif; I was so her son, no doubt.
“I’m still learning.” Jasper’s lips quivered a smile, even though his eyes were wet.
Mum leaned over and gave Jasper a kiss on his forehead. “And I’m here to teach you.”
I didn’t need to hear any more. I could work it out.
Leif, clearly not as satisfied as I was, questioned, “What did you hear that made him threaten you?”
Jasper looked between me and Leif, then Mum and Dad, and back again.
“I heard him talking about taking Mister Metaxas. And he said if I told anyone, they’d really hurt me.”
Chapter Eleven
The Knuckle Dragger’s Surprise
Dad coughed into his tea. It spurted everywhere. “I thought you’d been feeding Mister Metaxas, Leif? No wonder we haven’t been hearing him barking lately when you’ve come down the street from school if he’s been stolen.”
“Kidnapped, Dad,” I corrected him. “Mister Metaxas has been kidnapped.” I was sure it was in the Wallace genes to correct everyone.
Dad wiped up the mess he’d made with a napkin, dabbing loudly so the table rattled. He was trying his best, he really was. I loved him to pieces. “The result is the same, Sport, whatever you want to call it.”
“It’s okay, David.” Leif then proceeded to tell my parents all about the ransom notes and what had happened so far.
My mum’s reaction was predictable and full of concern. “We have to tell the principal.” I’m sure the principal’s ears were burning right about now. He’d be sitting there with his wife enjoying dinner wo
ndering why he had such a strange feeling, I was sure.
Leif, again ever the one to speak profoundly said, “If it is Owen who took Mister Metaxas, then I want to confront him about it first.”
“But, darling—”
“He’s my dog.” Leif’s voice wasn’t filled with anything but love, even though his eyes reflected his deeper sadness. “It’s what I want to do to get him back to me without him being hurt.”
Dad said, “And we respect your wishes, Leif.”
“Thank you.”
But Mum wasn’t so willing to let go of the bone, so to speak. “If Owen hasn’t taken Mister Metaxas, then I want you to tell me, darling. All right?”
Leif agreed and so did I.
I was relieved. Mainly because I didn’t know how much more I could take of all this, to be honest. Before I could voice that, Jasper said, “Mum, do you think you could show me how to put on some makeup now? For school tomorrow I think I’d like to wear eyeliner and…um, I don’t know what the stuff’s called that goes above your eyes. But I want to have that on, too. Nothing too obvious, but…you know, to make a start on things.”
Mum’s resulting smile by what my brother said almost split her face into two. She was positively beaming! “I think you’d look fabulous with eyeliner and eyeshadow on, honey.”
I had to admit I was kind of jealous, but in a good way. Jasper was going to take it one step at a time and I was glad I was there with him on the journey. My guilt eased a little.
Leif reached over and grabbed my hand. I told him through our contact about how I felt. His return pressure let me know he felt the same, but there was still that underlying worry about Mister Metaxas. And the uneasy feeling that it was too obvious to be Owen…
“He’ll be back with us soon,” I whispered, trying to convince myself more than anything.
Mum and Jasper left the kitchen in a whirl of enthusiasm. Dad sat stone-faced, staring into nothing. Leif and I left him, heading for my room. It was best that way. The house was going through a lot of adjustment.
Jasper finally came out of the bathroom after spending ages in there. It was good to see that normality had returned and even better because I knew it was for a good cause.
Today would be the first day he would reveal to the world about his genderfluidity.
I was nervous for him.
When I saw him, however, I couldn’t help but gasp in astonishment. He’d done a great job with the eyeliner and the other stuff mum had showed him how to apply last night. It was subtle and highlighted his features perfectly. Above his eyes, the eyeshadow was a subdued, soft blue, more like a bluish haze. It so suited him. He also wore lip gloss.
Jasper.
Was.
Beautiful.
And to say that about my brother was a huge step, especially considering how yesterday we were virtually enemies.
“What do you think?” A nervous smile crawled across Jasper’s fabulously shiny lips. “Too much?”
Leif immediately replied, “You look amazing, Jasper.”
Jasper turned his attention to me. I had to admit I was getting a bit emotional, more so because I knew he wanted my opinion. He needed me. I couldn’t speak, so I let my actions do that for me.
I hugged my brother.
He returned it with just as much love.
When we let go, missing the feeling of finally being close to him again already, he said with a thick voice, “Now you’re going to make my eyeliner run. But thanks, Lyle. I…I needed that.”
“Same.” It felt good to be close again. And when I thought about that, even though Jasper and I had been going through a bad patch, there was, and always had been, the foundation of our love between us.
That could never be eroded.
“Then we’d better get to school so everyone can see how awesome you are,” I suggested.
“And talk to Owen,” Leif chimed in.
The doorbell rang.
Mum fluttered into the front loungeroom, compelled to answer it. I set her mind at ease, because the doorbell ringing at this time of day would have triggered her. “It’s okay, Mum. It’s only Edwin and Ben. I asked them to come get us so we could all walk together to school today for Jasper’s big moment.”
I’d also informed Ben and Edwin about Jasper.
Edwin was awesome when he’d replied to my text last night: Good on him. He’s so lucky he has a supportive family. Ben’s been telling me about how he was treated by his and it’s not nice. See you tomorrow, Lyle. Love you! Ben says he loves you, too.
I’d replied: G’nite, Edwin. Talk tomorrow. I love you as well. Leif says he also loves you.
I smiled. I really did have awesome friends. But Jasper looked taken aback. “You want me to walk to school with all of you?”
“We do. Don’t we, Leif?”
Leif nodded. “Of course. Wouldn’t be the same without you now, Jasper.”
Mum interjected, “Oh, and before you go, honey, I got to tell you the confirmation email came this morning about those things we ordered. They’ll be here today.”
I shot my attention back to Jasper and he blushed. “Um…thanks.”
“What things?” Leif asked innocently. I slipped my hand into his. I didn’t need to apply much pressure to tell him that perhaps Jasper didn’t want to reveal everything just yet. “Oh.” Leif added once he got my message.
“It’s…it’s okay.” Jasper stammered, going to the door. “It’s…Mum bought me underwear that’s more comfortable now I’m, you know…developing. And I need something more supportive as well.”
Mum announced, “There’s this really great website that caters for boys who want to wear girls’ things. They state that their items are practical and comfortable while still being feminine and pretty. We had to place an order, didn’t we, honey?”
Jasper was now beaming a smile, even if crooked with nerves. “We sure did.”
Okay, now I really was jealous. Kidding. I was so happy for him I couldn’t help but swing the hand that held Leif’s.
Mum, her compulsion to do so ingrained, opened the front door.
And, boy, I had a feeling it was going to be one of those days where surprises were plentiful, because my brother wasn’t the only one making huge steps to be themselves. Edwin was wearing Ben’s numbered sports jacket; he looked great in it.
“Jasper!” Ben and Edwin blurted in unison as soon as they saw him.
Ben added, “You look absolutely amazing, buddy!”
Edwin chimed in, “Better than amazing, because you’re becoming yourself. And that’s brilliant.”
What followed was heaps of hugging, back-patting, and congratulations all round. Everyone loved Jasper’s new look, as I knew they would. My brother got emotional again.
“Did you want to hold my other hand, Jasper?” I asked.
“That would be good.” He slipped his hand into mine without further hesitation.
Soon, we were all walking to school, enjoying the sunshine and each other’s company, laughing and joking and chatting away.
“Hey, Jasper,” Edwin said, craning his neck to look behind. He was walking in front of us, holding Ben’s hand—the footpath only wide enough for three, not five. “Are you thinking about wearing the school skirt instead of the pants any time soon?”
“I have been,” Jasper replied. “My Mum’s going to meet with the PTA next week to discuss it. But yeah, if I’m allowed, I’d like to when I’m ready.”
“Oh, wow. That’d be cool if you could,” Ben said. “And I can bring it up at the next Safe School’s meeting, if you like, make everyone aware that the school uniform shouldn’t be about separating people but bringing them together as the school’s motto states: Unity through knowledge.”
“Thanks, Ben.” Jasper’s face brightened. Wowsers, I loved, loved, loved how my friends supported him, too. They were awesome! I couldn’t help but feel pride as I really did have the best friends in the world. “That would be helpful, because at the moment
I can only wear the boys’ uniform. And I’d like a choice, because as I’m discovering, I feel different every day and I want to wear clothes that reflect that.”
“Then done and done, Jasper, buddy. Done and done.”
But Leif must have had his mind on other things. “Where would we find Owen this morning, Ben? I’d like to talk to him.”
“We’d both like to talk to him,” I interjected.
Ben seemed shocked, his eyebrows flying up his forehead. “What the hell do you want to talk to Owen Jones about? Because he’s not exactly the most approachable human being on the planet.”
Leif said. “I want to talk to him about the ransom notes and how he’s now the prime suspect thanks to what Jasper’s told us.”
Ben stopped dead in his tracks, and Edwin had no choice to join the abrupt interruption to our walk. He turned to face us, one eyebrow cocked. “Er, buddy…Owen couldn’t have done those ransom notes.”
“Why not?” Leif asked incredulously.
I knew he was relying on Owen being the one who took Mister Metaxas, for his own sanity. I needed it, too. I couldn’t wait for all of this to be over so we could get on with things. Not the constant worry or stress caused by Mister Metaxas’ kidnapping. But something still nagged at the back of my mind that said it wasn’t Owen, even if he was the next logical choice to question.
But who else could it be?
“Because, the dude can’t spell to save his life,” Ben explained. “He’s illiterate and wouldn’t know what letters went where to paste it onto the paper. Seriously.”
Chapter Twelve
Jasper’s Love
I was shocked.
Okay…more than shocked.
God, it was becoming normal now, wasn’t it? Me gasping in surprise as each bombshell was dropped. But then when I thought about it, I wasn’t shocked. I was only surprised by Owen being illiterate, not about him not being capable of making the ransom notes.
The wind kicked up, sending leaves swirling around our feet. A shiver ran down my spine from the chill. Leif and Jasper looked at me, obviously feeling my discomfort through my hands.
The Fabulous Adventures of Leif & Lyle Page 8