He didn’t slow, didn’t show any signs of interest. “You need the Lord and a good night’s sleep. We can talk about the rest later.”
“We can?” She felt a flicker of hope. Maybe Cody was interested in her, after all. Even though she’d made a fool of herself tonight. “Where a’ we going?”
“Keep walking. We’re almost there.”
They reached a set of stairs that looked vaguely familiar, but when Andi tried to open her eyes there seemed to be two of everything. And both sets were slipping about, refusing to stay still. “Yikes.” She buried her head in his shoulder. “These stairs are tough.” Her words ran together, no matter how hard she tried to articulate. She was embarrassed at herself. “I’m a real winner, hey Cody?”
“We’ll talk about it later.” He was stronger than she had thought. “Hold onto my neck, okay.”
She did as he asked, and he swept her up into his arms. Then he carried her up the stairs and through the door. Once inside he set her down and helped her along like before until they reached a door. Her door. It all looked familiar again. Of course … it was the door to her room.
“You have a key?” He waited.
A key? She padded her sweater pockets and then her jeans and finally she felt something. Her key ring. She took it from her pocket and held it out. “Not sure which one …”
“I’ve got it.” He opened her door in no time and helped her across the small floor to her bed. “Lay here.”
She fell onto her bed and crooked her arm over her eyes. Even then the room was moving in giant circles and her stomach felt sicker than before. What a fool she’d made of herself. How could Cody ever look at her the same again. “Cody?”
“Just a minute.” There was the sound of running water, and then he was at her side again. He had a cold damp washcloth and a bottle of water. “Sit up. See if you can drink this.”
She could barely open her eyes, barely understand what he was doing. But when the cool water hit her lips, she figured it out. He was helping her, trying to ease her drunkenness.
“I’ll leave the water here, okay?” He took the bottle, set it down, and came to her again. “Lay down and let’s get this cloth on your head.”
But Andi didn’t want to lay down. She wanted Cody to hold her the way Ben and Jake had tried to hold her. It wouldn’t be scary and rough with someone like Cody, and in that moment all she wanted was to be in his arms, to have him kiss her the way she wanted to be kissed. She slid to the edge of the bed and circled her arms around his waist. “Stay with me, Cody. Jus’ lay with me for a while, okay?”
“Andi, you don’t know what you’re saying.” He put his hand on her shoulder and gently tried to ease her back onto the bed. “Go to sleep. You won’t remember any of this tomorrow.”
“Yessa’ will.” She stood and tried to hug him, but her legs wouldn’t hold her. “Stay, Cody. Bailey’s gone for the weekend. She won’t know.”
At the mention of Bailey’s name, Cody’s resistance doubled. He took a step back, freeing himself from her embrace. Then he handed the wet cloth to her and moved for the door. “Sleep. I’ll check on you tomorrow.”
Andi was angry at him and humiliated, mad that he’d rejected her offer so easily and completely. But of course he had. She had to look and smell pathetic after what she’d been through tonight. She didn’t tell him goodbye or thank you or anything. Instead she flopped back down on the bed and put the cool cloth on her head. Fine. Let him go. She didn’t need Cody to have a good time. She didn’t need—
Before she could finish the thought, she felt her stomach kick into reverse again. She tried to run for the bathroom, but she fell to the floor and had to crawl there, instead. Her face barely found a spot over the water when she began throwing up. For what felt like an hour she sat there against the cold, damp toilet, her stomach convulsing every few minutes.
Somehow she made it back to her bed, but her heart was racing again and she was terrified about what she’d done. The list of terrible choices screamed at her, until she cried out loud for God to help her, for Him to forgive her. She never should’ve gone to the party, never should’ve drank. How could she have let Ben treat her like that? And what had she said to Cody for that matter? How could she ever look him in the face again?
“I’m so bad.” She cried out loud into the darkness. “Do you even love me anymore, God?”
Sometime after that she must’ve fallen asleep, because the next thing she was aware of it was daylight. The time on her clock read ten thirty, and she blinked a few times before the full force of her headache hit her. She pictured herself in the frat house kitchen, Ben from her math class all over her, and she felt disgusted with herself. How terrible she must’ve looked, how loose and cheap. Another image came to mind, Ben pouring something into her beer. She wouldn’t have gotten so sick on three beers—even if she’d never drank before. He must’ve poured hard liquor into her beer. That would explain how drunk she’d gotten.
She pictured him leading her to the lawn across from the frat house, and how quickly things had gotten out of control. Only then did she remember the couple interrupting them and her phone call to Cody. He had come without hesitating, because he was that kind of guy. She pressed her thumb and forefinger in against her temples and tried to stop the pounding there. Cody had walked her home, right? Which meant her car was still parked across from the frat house.
“Ughhh.” She groaned as she tried to sit up. Then she remembered the breakfast date she’d had with her mom and Kelly. Her eyes flew to the clock again, but it was too late. She was supposed to be there at ten o’clock. “What have I done?” She slumped over her knees and held her head in her hand. She’d made a fool of herself in every possible way, going against her parents and her conscience, and most of all, her God.
She looked on the nightstand for her cell phone, but she found it still in the back pocket of her jeans. It was on silent mode, and sure enough, she’d missed three calls from her mother. She ran her tongue over her teeth and grimaced at the disgusting taste in her mouth. She’d been sick … the memory was coming back now. The alcohol from last night still hung in her breath.
“How could this happen?” she muttered the question and covered her face once more. After a minute she reached into her nightstand drawer and pulled out Rachel Baugher’s quote book. “You wouldn’t recognize me, Rach.” She flipped through the pages and came across one she hadn’t noticed before. “Character is a long habit continued.” Plutarch.
A long habit continued? What did that say about Andi, then? And what would Rachel say if she were here now, or Bailey for that matter? How could she ever look at her roommate again?
Suddenly she remembered her final question before she passed out the night before. After all she’d done in the past week, did God still really love her? At first she had no answers for herself, but then she leaned back against her pillow and there … there was the damp washcloth. She stared at it, and slowly the truth came to light. Yes, God did love her, even if she would never outlive the shame from what she’d done. God loved her because just when she was at her most desperate moment, He had sent her Cody Coleman.
What other proof did she need?
Twenty-Five
THEY WERE ALMOST OUT OF TIME, and soon Keith would have to sit down with Chase and come up with an exit plan, a way to address the cast and crew and thank them for their hard work, but at the same time to tell them that they couldn’t finish the film. The last bit of hope they’d had—that Entertainment Tonight would air the special about their project sometime this weekend—had fallen through. The producer of the piece had left a message on Friday afternoon telling them that the story was finished, and that it would likely air sometime next month.
The call to ET was one more they would have to make in the days to come. If Keith’s calculations were right, they could shoot the film the first half of Tuesday—in case some miracle came through. Unless that happened sometime between now and then, the dismissal t
alk would come during lunch that day.
They’d completed another full week of filming, and though Keith was concerned about Andi and the distance she had seemed to put between herself and her parents recently, there remained one very strong bit of light. The scenes they were capturing were still among the best work Keith or Chase or any of the film crew had ever seen. Clearly the cast and crew were passionate about The Last Letter, so if ever there was a way to finish it, they might still find a way to reach the world with the power of a moving picture.
But for now, Keith refused to borrow from the pain that was coming. He and Lisa and Chase were on their way to a Baxter Sunday dinner, something Dr. Baxter’s daughters had been talking about with Lisa since the prayer meeting. None of the Baxters knew about the money problems the producers were facing, but Ashley had been back to the set a few times, and she’d asked Lisa how her family could continue to pray for the project.
If things went well today, Keith hoped to have the entire group of them pray. He reached out and took hold of his wife’s hand, careful not to bump the vase of flowers she was holding. “I’m glad we’re doing this.”
“I’ve been looking forward to it.” She looked more relaxed than she had all week, her eyes showed none of the stress she’d been carrying around. “Ashley’s so nice. If we lived here, she and I would be best friends. All her sisters, really. And Katy, Dayne’s wife. Their family is amazing.”
From the backseat, Chase piped in. “It beats all-day meetings about money we don’t have.”
“Amen to that.” Keith laughed and the feeling felt foreign enough that he chided himself. Today … no matter what Tuesday held, he would love his wife and his new friends. He would engage in conversation about something other than the movie, and he would enjoy being part of a big family—even for just one day—and no matter what loomed ahead he would laugh.
He would definitely laugh.
As they pulled into the long driveway, the sun was just setting, casting brilliant light against the wraparound front porch and the trees that framed the property on either side. Keith had gotten the story from Lisa, that Dr. Baxter not too long ago had sold the old Baxter house, as they called it, to his daughter Ashley and her husband Landon.
“Wow.” Lisa motioned for Keith to stop for a moment. “Look at this place. It’s like the perfect family house. The porch and the windows, even from here it feels like the walls have seen a lifetime of love.”
“It’s how I pictured it.” Keith leaned over the steering wheel and took in the place. “I can imagine the kids running across the big open grass and shooting baskets at the hoop out front.”
“Looks like there’s a creek behind the house. Probably perfect for frogs and snakes.” Chase grinned. “But right now they probably think we’re lost or something.”
Keith laughed out loud this time. He parked near half a dozen other cars and they were met at the door by Ashley. She had her baby girl in her arms, her pretty dark hair tucked behind one ear. “Come on in. Everyone’s here.”
“I brought these.” Lisa handed over the vase of wildflowers. “Thanks so much for including us.”
“We’re glad you came.” As they walked through the entryway and down a hall she stopped at a painting on the wall. “This is mine.” She gave an easy shrug with one shoulder. “It’s what I do when Bailey babysits for me.”
Keith, Lisa, and Chase all stopped and studied the piece of art. Lisa was first to comment. “This is beautiful. Before we go you have to show me your other paintings. Anything you have here.”
Ashley laughed and continued down the hall. “The best artwork in this house are the faces around the table.”
The thought was reassuring, a reminder to Keith and all of them that the movie wasn’t the greatest thing at stake this week. People were vastly more important and the comment by Ashley reminded Keith that something was wrong with Andi. Keith and Lisa had known that since last weekend, but she wouldn’t say more than a few words to them. Even today they’d asked her to come, but she’d refused. Too much homework. Her excuses were sounding like just that—excuses. Tomorrow he and Lisa were going to take her out to dinner and get to the bottom of whatever was troubling her. Until then, he would be grateful for the priorities Ashley had inadvertently helped bring back into focus.
They reached the main part of the house and the scene taking place through the kitchen and dining room was like something from a movie he’d love to make someday. Ashley got everyone’s attention and introduced the three of them. “Now,” she laughed, “don’t worry if you don’t remember everyone. There won’t be a test.”
“A test might help!” A blond boy came up and put his arm around her waist. He looked ten or eleven, and clearly he was her son.
“Thank you, Cole.” Ashley lifted her eyebrows at him. “But we aren’t going to make our new friends take a test.”
“Okay.” He gave a happy look as if to say the test thing was just an idea. Then he put his hand on his chest. “I’m Cole.”
“I’m Maddie,” a spunky little girl came up and stood next to him. The two of them caught each other’s eyes and started giggling.
“Wait a minute!” John Baxter brushed his hands off on his jeans and waved at the group. “Everyone get with your immediate family. Then we’ll do the introductions right.”
Keith was laughing again. He put his arm around Lisa and didn’t even try to keep a straight face while the Baxter family struggled for a way to even begin introducing their group.
“Okay … let’s start with Dayne, and move on, oldest to youngest. Everyone in your family.”
Cole leaned close to the girl who must’ve been his cousin. “What’s intermediate family?”
She made a face like she was trying to think of a good answer. “I guess the people you’re sort of in the middle of. Like your mom and dad and stuff.”
“Seriously, everyone.” Ashley sent a somewhat stern look to Cole and his cousin. “Let’s listen to Dayne. It’s his turn.”
Dayne took the lead, introducing himself, his wife, Katy, and their baby girl Sophie. Keith smiled to himself. As if Dayne Matthews and his family needed introductions.
After Dayne a tall, slender man waved in their direction. “I’m Peter.” He grinned. “I married into this circus.” He waited for the ripple of laughter and votes of agreement to pass. “I’m married to Brooke, and these are our daughters, Maddie and Hayley.”
Maddie, the spunky one who’d been talking to Cole, raised her hand and then blurted out. “Just so you know, Hayley just learned to ride her bike.” She looked to her mother for approval, that this detail was indeed noteworthy. She nodded. “I thought that was important for our intermediate family.”
“Immediate family.” Brooke put her finger to her lips. “Let’s listen to everyone else.”
Again Keith stifled a laugh. These people were great. He already felt the same way Lisa did, that if they moved here this would be where they’d come for Sunday dinner every week.
Next another young mom with a strong resemblance to Ashley jumped in. “I’m Kari, and this is my husband, Ryan. Our one-year-old Annie is out in the other room sleeping.”
“We hope.” Ryan brushed his hand across his forehead in a mock show of relief.
“Yes, we hope.” Kari made a funny face. “And this is Jessie and our son, R. J.”
Ashley went next. “You pretty much know me. I’m Ashley and this is Landon. Our kids are Cole, Devin, and little Janessa Faith.”
Keith had the feeling as the introductions went on that each of these young couples had a unique and beautiful story, their reasons for falling in love and the journey that had brought them to this point. Someday he hoped to learn more about them than their names.
A quiet man went next. “I’m Sam, and this is my wife, Erin. We just moved back to town from Texas.” He went on to introduce his four daughters, all of whom seemed sweet and polite, but more shy than their cousins.
Luke went last. “You k
now me.”
“Yes.” Chase gave a strong nod. “We could be family after how long we spent together battling the union.”
Luke went on, “This is my wife, Reagan, and our children Tommy and Malin.”
Both young children clung to their mother’s leg, but Tommy stepped out from his hiding place long enough to hold up his hands claw-like and let out a long roar. “I’m not Tommy. I’m Tommy-saurus Rex!”
“Nice to meet you.” Keith bit the inside of his cheek. Nothing could be more insulting to a dinosaur than to not be taken seriously.
“I’m John, the father of this wonderful group.” He smiled at Keith and then spoke loud enough for the others to hear him. “Keith and I met over Jake Olson’s stitches, in case everyone missed that part.” He put his arm around a pretty woman with fashionable blonde-gray hair. “And this is my wife, Elaine.”
“Whew.” Chase pretended to be scribbling down the names on his hand. “I don’t know about that test, Cole. I’ll fail for sure.”
“Yeah, but you got my name right!” he hurried over and high-fived Chase. “That’s one-for-one!”
The dinner was something Keith would never forget. Two tables were set up in the dining room, and between them, everyone had a seat. And though eight different conversations were almost always taking place at once, somehow the feel and tone of each one seemed to blend perfectly with the adjacent one.
As if the music and rhythm of life for the Baxter family was always and beautifully on key.
Keith and Lisa sat near John and Elaine, and halfway through the meal John asked about Andi. “I thought she was coming.”
“She was.” Keith felt the unfamiliar ache in his heart where his daughter was concerned. “She’s having a hard time right now … confused between what she’s been taught and what she thinks she is missing out on.”
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