by B L Teschner
Dwayne’s head fell to the side to face the back of Connor’s. “Sorry. I wouldn’t have said that if I knew.”
Poor kid. I breathed in a heavy sigh. “You have us here, so don’t worry about anything, okay?”
Connor stayed quiet and Dwayne scoffed again. “Layla… That girl can be annoying, can’t she? You know, she thought I was here for dealing drugs. Can you believe that? I said, ‘What, because I’m black I deal drugs?’” He turned over, propping himself up on his elbow. “You know what? The two guys I’ve met that are in here for dealing drugs are white. I’m gonna tell Layla that tomorrow.”
Before I could respond, the door to the room opened and one of the security guards—I couldn’t tell which one—poked his head in. “Quiet down,” his deep voice addressed the dark space. With that he closed the door and we all listened, the only sounds left to hear were the wind gently blowing a tree against one of the windows, and a handful of boys sniffling in their beds.
An hour passed, and I couldn’t sleep. I got out of bed and creeped over to the door, passing some teens who were talking down low to each other about their home life. They didn’t seem to care that I was leaving. Peeking my head out, I looked up one end of the hallway and down the other. It was deserted. I stepped out and went right toward the club room, which was where they had the board games and decks of cards. I figured maybe I could grab a deck and play some solitaire.
With every careful step I took the floor creaked under my sock-covered feet. The chandeliers that were hanging in the first-floor hallways were carried up in the second-floor halls, and they hung motionless above me, their lights barely shining on the lowest setting, giving off just enough light for me to see. As I passed the other closed doors, I glanced out of the large windows on the opposite wall. The weather was changing; it was windy and the trees were swaying, the brightness of the moon now covered by dark clouds.
I made it to the club room and tested the handle, grateful that it was unlocked. Turning the old round knob slowly, the door creaked open, and I noticed the lights were on in the room, dimmed just as low as the hallway was. I peeked my head around the door. What would happen if one of the members of the staff caught me out of bed? I couldn’t lie and say that I needed to use the bathroom because our room had a bathroom area that was comparable to a high school gym locker room.
Something caught my eye and I almost ducked out before taking a second look. “Millie?”
Four
Millie
“Move it, loser,” Jill ordered with a flip of her long blonde hair. “I called dibs on this bed before you did.”
“But my stuff was here first.”
Her eyes narrowed, and I could tell she was contemplating punching me right square in the face. “If you want, I can show you how serious I am.”
My shoulders slumped and I grabbed my stuff in defeat, silently cursing myself for not standing up to her as I looked for an open bed. It took a few minutes, but I found the last empty one a few spots away from the far window. At least I would be able to look outside at night.
“Hey,” a familiar voice called out as I sat my stuff down.
I turned around and smiled at Layla. “Hey.”
“Well, I asked around and couldn’t find anyone who would switch rooms with me; it seems no one wants to risk getting in trouble.”
I nodded and threw back the blankets on my new bed, sitting down on the edge. “I don’t blame them.”
She studied our surroundings. “Our rooms look the same. I’m toward the door, though. I like that; I can get out quick if I need to.”
“In case they plan an attack on us?” I half-jokingly laughed.
“Exactly.” Her eyes met mine. “Hey, are you okay? You seem off.”
“Yeah,” I shrugged. “I just had a run in with that girl over there.” I nodded in Jill’s direction. “The pretty one with the blonde hair.”
Layla looked over her shoulder at her. “Oh yeah, she overheard me trying to find someone to swap rooms with me. She gave me an attitude about it. What did she do to you? Do you need me to kick her ass?”
“Nah. She just took my bed so I had to sleep in this one.”
Her head snapped back over at me. “Are you kidding?”
“Nope.”
“What’s her name?” she asked, her fists clenching at her sides.
“Jill.”
“Well it looks like I’ll be paying Jill a little visit on my way out.”
“I wouldn’t do that,” the girl beside us warned. She took a book out of her backpack and sat down on her bed. “The word is she came here for fighting. I guess back home she’s in some kind of hardcore gang.”
“Gang?” I asked, my eyebrows raising. “She doesn’t seem like the type.”
Layla’s hand came to her hip. “Well, as Dwayne would so annoyingly tell us, you can’t judge a book by its cover.” She sat down next to me. “What’s your name?” she asked the girl who now had her nose in her book.
“Sammy,” she said without looking up. “And I’m not here to make friends; I’m here to serve my time and get the hell out.”
“What are you here for?” I asked.
Her finger flipped the page. “I’m here for ‘sinning’, just like you are.”
Layla and I looked at each other and shrugged. I understood not wanting to make friends with people here. Some kids were crazy.
“So,” Layla clucked beside me, the friskiness coming back in her tone, “Toby’s pretty hot, huh?”
I could feel my face redden. “Yeah. He’s pretty cute.”
“Cute is an understatement.” She leaned back on her hand, her breasts poking forward. “Have you been to the club room yet?”
“I’ve seen it, yeah.”
“You know, the boys’ rooms are past it if you keep walking.”
The corner of my lip curled up. “And I’m sure you’ve checked them out already.”
“Oh yeah,” she said with a satisfied grin. “And I met someone, too.”
I slapped her shoulder with the back of my hand. “You did? Who?”
“His name is Brad; he’s here for stealing cars. He says he’s obsessed with the rush and he can’t stop.” A heavy sigh left her glossy lips. “You should see him. He is so easy on the eyes.”
“Well, have him sit with us at breakfast tomorrow.”
She toyed with the idea. “Nah, I think I’ll keep him at a distance. I’m just gonna have some fun with him; I don’t want him hanging around me all the time.” She leaned forward and stood up, looking over in Jill’s direction. “Well, I guess I better get back to my room.” She focused back on me. “See you tomorrow?”
“Yeah. See you tomorrow.”
With a smile, she spun around and strolled to the door. She slowed down in front of Jill’s bed and stared her down, which made Jill stiffen and ask her what her problem was, adding a few choice cuss words in as well. Layla just went out the door without looking back. Jill glared over at me like I was wearing a target on my chest.
The lights went out above us at nine o’clock. I faced the window as I tried to relax on the uncomfortable mattress I was on. It was so lonely at this place. Most of the troubled teens weren’t that easy to get along with; it was scary falling asleep in the same room as them, especially with girls like Jill so close by. It felt like I was in juvenile hall. But I imagine to my mom it was fitting that I stay at a place close to it, since she told me I would end up there anyway if I continued down the path I was on.
I curled my hand in against my chest, pulling a wad of blanket along with it to snuggle against as I noticed the wind picking up outside, which made the trees move methodically with it. I actually missed my mom for some reason; I couldn’t figure out why. She put me here, after all. A part of me understood the reason why she gave up on me, since I was a repeat offender, never learning my lesson. But she knew I was a good person and that I didn’t deserve to be here.
A tear rolled down my cheek and soaked into the firm pi
llow beneath my head. It was no use; I wouldn’t be able to sleep while I was so upset, and I didn’t even know how long I had already been laying there. I threw back the covers and stood up, being careful not to cause much attention to myself as I went to the bathroom. The floors creaked under my bare feet as I passed the other girls sleeping in their beds. The entrance to the bathroom was in our room; it was a door off to the side that opened into a locker-type room that had five shower stalls on one side and five toilet stalls on the other, with a row of three sinks on the far end. The floor and walls were covered in small white tiles that looked like they were a newer addition, but the room still had that vintage look to it that the rest of the building had. The same style of chandeliers that were in the halls hung from the ceiling in there as well, and they were turned down low enough to cast an almost eerie glow on the room.
The unmistakable sound of someone throwing up stopped me in my tracks; it was coming from the first stall.
I stepped up to the closed door and rapped my knuckle against it; it swayed. “Hello?”
Whoever was in there heaved again instead of answering.
Reluctantly, I pushed open the unlocked door to find a girl slouched over the toilet bowl. “Are you okay?” I asked.
Her head slowly turned as she looked up at me. I had seen her in our room earlier, although I hadn’t made an attempt to talk to her; her bed was on the opposite side of the room from mine.
“Who are you?” she asked.
“I’m Millie. I saw you earlier; we’re assigned to the same room.”
Her short brown hair was drenched with sweat and pieces of it were hanging over her eyes; she tried unsuccessfully to move it away with the back of her hand. “I… I need help. Can you help me?”
“Sure,” I said, crouching down in front of her. “Do you need me to go get the doctor?”
“No,” she told me firmly. “I don’t want to see anyone who works here. I already asked them for help earlier and they refused to give me anything.”
My eyebrows drew together. Why would the doctor refuse to treat her? “Then tell me what I can do for you. How can I help?”
Her body trembled. “Percocet.”
I blinked hard in thought. “Percocet. Isn’t that pain medication?”
She nodded. “Yeah. I haven’t had one since yesterday and I’m having withdrawals. Do you have anything you can give me?”
My head shook from side to side. “I’m so sorry but no, I don’t.”
“Yeah, I figured as much.” She tried to clear the thick saliva from her throat and spit into the bowl. “When I came here they told my parents that I would gradually be weaned off of it, so they encouraged us to bring it. Because of that reason, I didn’t hide any where the ‘sun doesn’t shine’ to get me by for later. I talked to the others in here and they said they were told the same thing. I think it’s a tactic they use on the kids who are sent here for using drugs to make sure they don’t hide anything. That big goon searched my bags and took my stash. He said I’d be sorry if I were hiding anything from him. The look he had in his eyes… I believed him.”
“And you went to the doctor as sick as you are, and he refused you any help?”
She scoffed and rested her face against the rim of the toilet seat. “Yep.”
“That’s terrible.”
“I know.” Her eyes closed and her breaths deepened, as if the coolness of the porcelain felt good against her cheek. “And they won’t even let me call my parents.”
A chill ran through my body. This place was supposed to be somewhere for us teens to better ourselves as people. This poor girl was all alone in an empty tiled bathroom, hugging the toilet while her body shook uncontrollably from her withdrawal. It was terrible to watch, and it was terrible for her to go through.
“What’s your name?” I asked.
“They call me Blue back at home; it’s my favorite color.”
It was then that I noticed the blue tank top and matching pajama bottoms she was wearing. “Well Blue, I wish there was something I could do to help. Do you want some water? Or maybe a washcloth?”
Her head shook, which made her cheek teeter back and forth on the toilet seat. “No thanks. The only thing I need is Percocet.”
My lips fell into a frown as I stood up and crossed my arms over my chest. “I’m going to take a walk. I’ll come back and check on you later, if you don’t mind.”
Her eyes stayed closed. “I’m sure I’ll still be here.”
After using the restroom myself, I snuck out into the hall and made my way to the club room to check it out some more. The building had a disturbing vibe about it, an ominous menacing presence that didn’t make it welcoming in the least, especially during the night. I almost ran back the way I came when I found the room I was looking for. Deciding to stick it out, I went inside the club room and carefully closed the door behind me, slowly releasing the handle so it wouldn’t spring loudly back into place.
There wasn’t much to see besides the rows of tables and chairs and the book cases of board games. There were a few rows of books, so I decided to check those out and see if there was one I would be interested in reading. Maybe the moonlight would shine bright enough through my window one of these nights so I could read it in bed.
Something creaked behind me. “Millie?”
When I spun around I almost screamed but stopped myself when I saw Toby. “Oh my gosh,” I sighed, bringing the book I was holding to my chest and clutching it tightly. “You scared me!”
Toby chuckled deeply and held his finger up to his lips. “Shh; someone might hear us.”
I lowered the book away from my chest and went to him. “What are you doing in here?”
“I could ask you the same thing.”
“I couldn’t sleep.”
“Neither could I.”
I smiled and pulled out a chair, being careful that it didn’t scrape loudly against the tiled floor. “There was a girl having a drug withdrawal in my bathroom,” I told him as I sat down.
He sat across from me. “Really? Is she okay?”
“I don’t know,” I shrugged. “She seemed in pretty bad shape.” I sat the book down on the table. “You know, she said they were supposed to help wean her off of the drugs she was taking. They even encouraged her to bring them all. They took them from her and won’t give her any. I guess she asked to call her parents and they told her no.”
His forehead wrinkled. “Are you serious?”
“Yeah.”
“That’s messed up.”
“I know. I’m going to check on her a little later to make sure she’s okay.”
“That’s cool of you.” A heavy sigh left his lips and it seemed like he was thinking about something. “So,” he finally began, “stealing, huh?”
I couldn’t contain my chuckle. “Yeah.”
“What did you steal?”
I leaned back in my chair, letting out a deep breath in the process. “Well, I stole makeup the first time, a few shirts the second time, and the last thing I stole that got me sent here was one of those stupid celebrity magazines.”
His eyebrows raised. “Really?” he said with a smile. “I don’t know you well, but judging by appearances only, all those things just don’t seem like the kind of stuff you would buy, let alone steal.”
“They’re not,” I agreed with a shrug. “But that’s why I did it.”
“I don’t get it.”
I reached my hand out and put it on the book, sliding it off the table and into my grasp, looking down at the bright picture on the front. “A thief isn’t who I am. If it were, I would have stolen something I really wanted.” I ran my fingers over the shiny cover. “Like this book. If I were truly a thief, I would have stolen this book.”
“I still don’t get why you did it.”
I smiled to myself and looked back up at his handsome face. “As you know, I’m a straight-A student; I never do anything wrong. I just wanted to do something wrong for once in my life.�
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“Or three times…”
“Or three times,” I laughed. I sat the book back on the table. “I wasn’t good at it, obviously, since I got caught every time.”
“And you didn’t go to jail?”
“Thankfully none of the stores pressed charges. They just called my mom.”
“Well, you have that innocent face,” he pointed out.
“And a mom with a lot of money,” I agreed with a nod.
He leaned forward and folded his arms, resting them on the table. “Well I only smoked pot once and it was just too much for my parents to handle I guess. They really changed their attitude toward me after that and decided to send me here.”
“Man, at least I got three strikes. Why did you smoke it?”
“Peer pressure is what I cop to, but, I just wanted to try it, honestly. Just to say I know what it’s like. I didn’t like it, though. I’m not interested in trying it again.”
“I’ve never tried it.”
“You’re not really missing anything.”
I nervously tucked my hair behind one ear. “So, what do you do at your school? You involved in anything fun?”
“Yeah, I play football.”
“Really? Are you any good at it?”
His head bobbed around as he pondered my question. “Yeah, you can say that. The reason my parents flipped out on me for smoking pot was because they didn’t want me to jeopardize a football scholarship. What about you? Play any sports?”
“No. My mom wouldn’t let me.”
“That sucks.”
“Yeah.”
“Is there a sport you would play if your mom allowed it?”
“Tennis,” I answered quickly, which made him smile.
“You sure knew the answer to that question already.”
I chuckled and leaned forward, folding my arms and resting them on top of the book. “Every time I see the kids from my school playing, or, someone playing it at the park, I just sit down and watch for as long as I possibly can. I can watch that tennis ball go back and forth for hours.”
“You should sign up this next school year.”