“So you get along well? You and Angela?” Jackie asked, stirring her drink.
“Yeah, although she’s more of a friend than anything else. I don’t see her as my stepmother. She’s only ten years older than me.”
Jackie tried to do some quick math, wondering how old that would make Payton.
“My mother hates her,” Payton said with a sigh. “But I think it’s all a show. Her husband divorced her and remarried a younger woman. She also doesn’t appreciate me defending Angela every single time she says something about her, which is often enough. It’s the age thing though. It always bothered her, but my dad wasn’t like that. They met through a mutual friend. He wasn’t out there looking to meet someone or chasing after younger women.”
“There’s thirteen years between Alvaro and Oliver,” Jackie said, tousling her hair. “And they’re perfect for each other. Think it all depends on the couple though. There’s plenty of times where it doesn’t work.”
“Speaking from experience?” Payton asked, taking a sip of wine.
Jackie opened her mouth and closed it again. “Yes,” she said. There was no point in lying. She was finally at the point where she could think about Megan without feeling much of anything anymore. “My ex was ten years younger than me.”
“And was that why it didn’t work out? Because she was too immature? Too young?”
Jackie wiped her palm across her face. Oliver was the only one who knew what had really happened. Alvaro too, because they shared everything, but Jackie had been too embarrassed to let anyone else know what had happened. She simply said that they’d broken up, that the distance had been too much.
“Not exactly,” Jackie said, finishing her drink. “She...” Jackie’s voice trailed off. She was going to say that Megan cheated on her, but now, a year later, Jackie could finally look at it objectively. Megan had cheated on her husband, not on her. “It was complicated,” she said instead.
Payton nodded. “Can I get you another drink?”
Jackie looked down at her empty glass. She wouldn’t mind getting to know Payton better, but she’d have to shift the conversation away from her. She really didn’t want to talk about Megan anymore.
“Sure,” Jackie said. “A gin and tonic, please.”
“Alright. I’ll be back in a minute.”
Jackie watched Payton weave her way through the crowd and back inside to the bar area, finding a place to squeeze in and get the bartender’s attention.
Payton was mature. Jackie had to say that much about her. She had a quiet confidence about her, but Jackie couldn’t help smiling when she thought about Payton mistaking Oliver for her husband.
She wasn’t the first person to make that assumption. A lot of their customers did, and they were affectionate with each other, but they were best friends.
Jackie glanced over at the bar and Payton was chatting with a woman that Jackie recognized but couldn’t remember her name. She bartended here. That was why she was so familiar. The woman’s hand was on Payton’s arm as they laughed, and Jackie looked away. She should have gone home and let Payton enjoy the rest of her night. She’d probably come here to meet someone, not spend the night talking to her neighbor.
Payton was back a few minutes later. “Sorry about the delay,” she said as she sat down.
“It’s okay,” Jackie said, waving her off. “This place is mental on a Friday night.”
“I like it though. I can see why you guys come here.”
“So,” Jackie said, leaning back in her chair. “How does it work when you’re lacking accurate gaydar? Do you go online to meet people? Do you wait for them to come to you?”
Payton smiled. “I don’t know. I’m trying to figure that part out. Assuming everyone is straight isn’t exactly working out for me.”
Jackie laughed. “No. I imagine it wouldn’t.”
“What about you?”
“What about me?” Jackie asked, unable to keep the smile off her face. She was finally starting to relax, or maybe it was just the alcohol.
“Do you have the confidence to walk up to someone on the street and ask them out?”
“No. I prefer to have gathered some information first. I don’t think I’d ever just ask someone out. I feel like I can usually tell, but I still wouldn’t have the confidence to do that. Coming here is easier. There’s a few more bars between here and Torremolinos, but we always end up here. Like you said, it’s just around the corner from where we live.”
“Okay,” Payton said, looking around. “This is my new regular.”
“Hoping for a holiday fling?”
“Maybe. Some light flirting would be enough, too. I don’t know. I’ve been single for a while, and I was such a mess this last year. I’m finally starting to feel like myself again, so maybe,” she said with a shrug. “I’ve never been one for flings so... I’ll probably just admire someone from a distance and wonder what might have been.” Payton smiled at her. “So, you’re not married to Oliver.”
Jackie’s lips slid into a warm smile. “No. I haven’t dated anyone since I broke up with my ex. I was kind of in the same place as you for the last year, for different reasons obviously, but I wasn’t in the right place to be dating anyone.”
“And now?”
“I’m getting there. You know how I was on the same flight as you from London? I was wrapping up the sale of my flat there, and for me, that’s that part of my life done. My ex lived in London, so I kept my flat there and split my time as best as I could with Sun and Sand, but I love it here. So, I sold the flat. That’s my closure.”
“Wow.”
Jackie nodded. “This is where my life is now. I have amazing friends. I love being this close to the beach. Malaga is a beautiful city, and it’s just a few minutes away. The business is doing well. We’re even thinking of expanding, so yeah, I’m getting there. It feels like things are falling into place now.”
“I’ve been thinking about what you said the other day, about going into digital marketing like my father.”
“Oh yeah?” Jackie asked, taking a sip of her drink.
“I don’t want to get involved with his business. He had a team and they’re going to keep going with it, so I’d be starting out on my own, but it’s something I’m seriously considering. I like the flexibility of it, because I really don’t know where I want to live yet. I mean, I can see the appeal of living here, but I still love New York. That’s my home. Then, I have a soft spot for London, too, so I don’t know. And I am aware that I probably sound like an entitled brat with three apartments to choose from, but I am grateful. I know I’m lucky.”
“You don’t sound entitled,” Jackie said, stirring what was left of her drink. “Your father worked hard. He came here to unwind, but he was good at what he did, and he loved having three different places he could call home. Do you think you’ll keep them?”
“I don’t know,” Payton said with a sigh. “That’s what I need to figure out while I’m here and away from my mother. She still thinks I’m going to come home from this ready to start my life as a lawyer. I already know that’s not going to happen. I don’t want her life.”
They finished their drinks, and Jackie knew she should go home, but she was enjoying getting to know Payton.
“I should go,” Jackie said, glancing down at her watch. “I’ve been here for the last six hours. We were attempting to cheer Oliver up, but he just ended up getting plastered.”
“So, mission accomplished?” Payton joked as she stood up.
“I guess... Are you leaving too?”
“Yeah. I’m thinking about opening a bottle of wine and sitting out on the balcony,” she said as they left the bar, following the promenade back towards Puerto Marina and their apartment building. “You’re welcome to join me. It’s kind of my new favorite thing. Just sitting out there. It doesn’t matter if it’s in the morning and I’m watching the sunrise or at night like this, getting to listen to the waves crashing into the shore... I love it. It’s s
o different from New York.”
Jackie would love to sit out on the balcony with her, like they had that first day when Payton had threatened her with a knife. It was hard to believe that was only a week ago. She’d only just met Payton, but Jackie felt like she’d known her for years. She was one of those people. It was easy to be around her, to talk to her. Maybe she’d join her for a glass of wine.
Chapter Seven
Payton poured two glasses of white wine and carried them out to the balcony. She’d had just the right amount of alcohol where she could almost forget about her embarrassing mix up earlier.
Why did she always have to say whatever came into her head? She would have figured out that Oliver and Jackie weren’t together if she’d just waited a few more minutes, but no, she had to blurt it out.
“I’d just like to say,” Payton said as she closed the sliding door behind her and handed Jackie her glass of wine, “That I don’t normally drink this much. I feel like I’m going to have to have a conversation with myself. Every time I go out for a walk, I end up sitting down at a bar to take a break, and I have a glass of wine or beer. I can’t keep doing that every day, can I?”
Jackie laughed. “Thanks, and cheers,” she said, clinking their glasses together, and they both took a seat. “It’s a different lifestyle here. The English or Irish that are here are either on their holidays or retired.” Jackie shrugged. “I guess, it depends if this is more than a holiday? I’d say keep it up while you’re relaxing and trying to figure out what to do with your life. When you settle down somewhere, I’m sure you’ll go back to your old ways.”
Payton nodded. “I like that. That’s great advice,” she said, taking a sip. “Nothing to worry about then.” She was nicely buzzed. She’d had a small glass of wine while she was getting ready earlier. She didn’t know what to wear, but she’d gone with something casual, jeans and a tank top, and thankfully, that had been the right choice.
The bar had a relaxed vibe, and Oliver, Alvaro, and Jackie had all been wearing jeans. Payton couldn’t believe it when Oliver had called her over. She’d gone there to get out of the apartment, and maybe to meet someone, but she ended up sitting across from Jackie, not that she was complaining, but it wasn’t how she saw her night going.
Payton had to use every bit of willpower to act normal when she joined Jackie and Oliver at their table, because Jackie looked amazing. She was wearing an emerald green tank top that brought out the flecks of green in her eyes. Her dark hair fell in loose waves across her shoulders, and Payton had let her mind go off into fantasy land, imagining what it would be like to run her hand through it.
Payton had been chatted up at the bar by an attractive woman, but she told her she was here with a friend. And it was true, but Payton also knew she wasn’t really interested in anyone right now. Crushing on Jackie was so much easier.
“It’s probably not great advice,” Jackie said with a sigh. “Not for your liver anyway, but I don’t know. I’m at a point in my life where I’m tired of doing what everyone thinks is the ‘right thing,’” she said, using air quotes. “I was completely blindsided by my ex. Now your father’s death. I don’t know. I think it’s time to start living. I know it’s a cliché.”
“What happened with your ex?” Payton asked, regretting the question as soon as it was out of her mouth. Jackie hadn’t told her much earlier, and Payton really should have taken that as a hint not to bring it up again, but now the question was out there. Hopefully, she hadn’t offended Jackie by asking.
“I feel so naive now, looking back on it.” Jackie shook her head as she picked up her wine glass. “It’s embarrassing, really.”
“What’s embarrassing is me assuming that you and Oliver were a couple, but anyway...”
Jackie smiled. “Hmm. You went quite red.”
“Did I?” Payton cringed.
“Yep.” Even in the dim lighting out on the balcony, Jackie’s hazel green eyes twinkled with mischief, but it was gone again a second later. “So, what happened was... I uh. I decided to surprise her in London. I hadn’t seen her in three weeks. We would have met up again in a week or two, but I just had this spontaneous urge to go over and show up on her doorstep. It was so unlike me. I like to plan things, so I really shouldn’t have been surprised when it backfired.”
“What happened?” Payton asked. She didn’t even have time to be happy that Jackie was bi or gay. She was more concerned with what Jackie was going to say next.
“I brought flowers. I can still smell them,” Jackie said as she took another drink. “And this man answered the door.”
“Oh, fuck.”
“Yeah. I immediately went through all the possibilities, any explanation really other than the obvious one.”
“It was her boyfriend?” Payton guessed, her stomach churning at the thought of facing a situation like that.
“No. Worse. Her husband.”
“Oh my God, Jackie.”
“Yeah. I uh,” she said with a laugh. “I pretended that I was delivering the flowers, you know, as a way to confirm that they were together, and yeah. They were married. I had no idea.”
“That’s awful.” Payton didn’t know what else to say. “What did she say?”
“I haven’t spoken to her since,” Jackie said as she took another drink. “Which pretty much shows how much I meant to her. I thought she might show up at my flat in London that night or the next day, but she didn’t. She never came here in the weeks after to offer some kind of explanation or apology. I never heard from her again.”
“That’s so shitty. How long were you together?”
“A year.”
Payton shook her head. “I’m so sorry.”
“I’ve had a year to process it, so I’m finally over it. It did take longer then it should have, but like I said, I was naive. I never questioned why we didn’t spend any time at her place. Anyway, it’s in the past. I’ve moved on.”
“I just can’t believe someone would do that,” Payton said, taking another drink. “You know what? I’m getting the bottle.”
The sound of Jackie’s soft laughter drifted into the apartment as Payton went back inside. There was nothing wrong with having an innocent crush on your neighbor. Jackie was fun to be around. Plus, Payton could use a friend while she was here. She took the bottle out of the fridge and brought it outside, refilling both their glasses.
“Thank you,” Jackie said. “I also don’t normally drink this much.”
“Hope I’m not a bad influence.”
“Definitely not,” Jackie said as she took a sip. “And thanks for listening. I actually haven’t told anyone other than Oliver.”
“Thanks for telling me,” Payton said softly, wishing that there was more she could say. She couldn’t even begin to imagine something like that happening to her.
“You’re easy to talk to,” Jackie said.
“Wine helps, too.”
“That is a fact. Although, I’ve done things a bit backwards tonight. Started with shots, moved onto gin and tonic, and now a glass or two of wine.”
“I would be on the floor somewhere right now if I’d had that much to drink,” Payton said.
“I’ve been out since six o’clock so I’ve somehow managed to pace myself. That being said, I am tipsy.”
“Good thing you only have to go across the hall.”
More than once tonight, Payton had to stop herself from touching Jackie’s arm when they were talking. She wasn’t a touchy-feely person, but it was something she did when she liked someone. A friend in New York had pointed it out, and now that she was aware of it, she was going to try her hardest not to do it. Not with Jackie, anyway.
Payton already thought that Jackie was out of her league, but hearing her talk about her ex, Payton knew there was no point thinking that this could ever be more than a crush. At the bar, Jackie had mentioned that her ex was ten years younger than her, and now, hearing about what she’d done, Payton would have to assume that Jackie wouldn’t
be interested in anyone younger than her ever again.
How old was Jackie?
If she had to guess, she’d say mid, maybe late thirties. At least ten years older than her, anyway, and Payton had a feeling that even if she was the last woman on Earth, Jackie wouldn’t be interested in her. Payton just got that vibe, and maybe that was for the best. She was only going to be here for a month or two, until she figured out what she wanted to do with herself.
A part of her wondered about a fling, even though that wasn’t Payton’s style, but after listening to Jackie talk about her ex, she doubted that Jackie would be up for something like that. She seemed like a romantic, like someone who valued relationships. A holiday romance was probably out of the question, unless Jackie was really over her ex and wanted to have some no-strings attached fun?
Payton took a drink. It really didn’t matter what Jackie would be up for, because Payton had never done casual, and she wasn’t going to start now. Figuring out what she wanted to do with her life was so much more important than giving in to this attraction.
Chapter Eight
Jackie padded over to the full-length mirror in the corner of her bedroom. She stood in front of it in a jade green dress with spaghetti straps, adjusting the strapless bra she wore underneath, making sure it was hidden. She turned to the side to get another view, craning her neck behind her as she checked the back.
Jackie stood on her toes to get a better idea of what it would look like if she was wearing heels. She’d had such a long day at work that she couldn’t face slipping her feet into heels, even for just a few minutes. A slit ran up to the middle of her thigh, and Jackie was starting to wonder if it was a bit much. She was nearly forty, and even though she was in good shape, she still felt a little self-conscious.
Oliver and Alvaro were getting married in one week. She had to figure out what she was going to wear and then accessorize it. She tied her hair up in a messy bun, pretending it was an up-do, and turned again, to the other side this time.
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