by Amy Ruttan
“What’re you looking for?” he asked. “The mugs are hanging up in front of you.”
“I’m looking for cinnamon.” She frowned. “You don’t have any.”
“I don’t cook. Remember? The remnants of that casserole you called traumatic is in my trash can.”
Kiera chuckled and pulled out a spoon to stir the milk. “Right. I forgot that you eat out.”
“I was never taught the basic skills of cooking. Boarding school, servants and privilege, remember?”
“I remember. Well, why don’t you come over here and I’ll teach you how to stir some warm milk.”
Henry got up and came up behind her. He could smell the lavender in her hair and it fired his senses though he resisted the urge to reach out and touch her as he stared down at the graceful curve of her neck.
“If you don’t stir it often, it will burn.”
“What?” he asked, shaking his head.
“The milk.” She glanced up at him and there was a pink tinge to her cheeks. He was standing so close to her and all he could think about was kissing her.
He didn’t really care about the milk or the hospital or the fact that his father was threatening to take away his shares. Shares he planned to sell anyway, and he’d give every red cent back to his father.
He didn’t care that he had shared too much of himself today.
He didn’t care about any of that.
All he could think about was the fact that Kiera was here. So close to him, wearing his clothes, and he could smell her hair.
“Stir the milk.” He cleared his throat and took a step back “Right. Got it.”
“If you had cinnamon, it would taste a heck of a lot better,” she said, turning off the stove and pulling down a mug so she could pour a cup for him.
He really didn’t give a hoot about the milk right now. It was a distraction from the fact that he wanted to kiss her.
Henry took his mug and wandered away from the kitchen, back to the couch. He sat down with his drink, which really tasted like sawdust in his mouth.
Kiera came over and sat down on the far side of the couch, cupping her mug as she sipped at it.
“It really would be better with cinnamon,” she said.
“I’ve never had warm milk before.”
“We’re going to have a conversation about warm milk?” she teased.
“No. I really don’t want that. What I’d like is sleep.”
“This couch looks great in here, but it’s not exactly comfortable, is it?”
“I know. I’m getting old and I’m not used to sleeping on a couch anymore.”
Kiera smiled at him. “Why don’t you come and sleep in your bed?”
His pulse skipped a beat, and he wasn’t sure he had heard her correctly. “What?”
“We’ll share. We’re adults. We can share a king-size bed, and you have enough pillows for a sufficient pillow wall.”
* * *
Kiera couldn’t believe she’d just invited Henry into bed. To share a bed with her because she couldn’t get to sleep, even though she was incredibly tired. Henry had shared so much about himself.
He was just like her.
And she did feel so alone. She could feel her barriers slipping.
It was scary, but she was lonely on the other side of the high walls she’d built for herself.
She had been hoping he’d still be awake, and even though she should have just stayed in his room and tried to sleep, she couldn’t. So she’d gotten up.
And as she was making the warm milk she was very aware of Henry standing close to her. She had also been very aware that she was sleeping in his bed.
Even though he had changed the sheets, she could smell him.
She could sense him. Everywhere.
All she’d been able to do was toss and turn, just like the previous night. Now she was wearing his clothes.
And more... She was sharing a drink with him and inviting him back to bed.
With her.
What had come over her?
What was wrong with her?
Ever since Henry had landed in Aspen and pulled her off her protest site, she’d been distracted.
She shouldn’t have come here tonight.
She should’ve just stayed home.
Only she hadn’t. She was here now, and she’d opened up to him and felt vulnerable and exposed. And now she was inviting him to share a bed.
She didn’t know what she was thinking, but right now they were both tired, and there was a large bed they both could sleep on together.
“Let’s go to bed.” She set down her mug. “I’m pretty good at building pillow walls.”
“Okay.” He set down his mug and grabbed his blankets and his pillow.
Her heart was hammering in her chest like a jackhammer. It thundered between her ears, and she wondered if he could hear it, too.
She was nervous.
She’d dated men before, she’d slept with men before, but somehow this was different, and she couldn’t figure out why.
It’s just sharing a bed. That’s all.
Kiera headed over to his bed to grab a few pillows, keeping one for her head as she set up a wall.
“You are good at pillow walls,” Henry said as she walked around the bed and sat down on the opposite side of the wall.
“See, this can be done.” Kiera pulled the blanket up. “We’re adults. We can be civilized, and we can both get a good night’s sleep.”
Henry didn’t respond, and when she peered over the pillow wall, she saw that he was lying on his back, his eyes closed, sleeping.
She smiled, watching him sleep in the darkness, just the light from outside casting shadows across his face. He looked kind of peaceful, this man who could be threatening her hospital, and her free clinic.
When she had heard that he was coming to Aspen, she had hated him. Hated the thought of him, but now that she had got to know him, it was different.
She understood him.
And that scared her. What if he abandoned her like her father had? Like Brent had?
What if Henry found someone else? Back in California it appeared he had multiple women and never for very long.
Brent had left her—what was stopping Henry from doing the same?
They were very similar, yet different. Her heart would break if Henry broke her trust. Of that she was certain.
This isn’t real. You have nothing to be afraid of.
The problem was it felt real, and she secretly wanted it to be.
She relaxed against the pillow and tried not to think about the fact that he was so close to her, that he was within an arm’s reach of her and that she was in his bed.
Kiera’s eyes closed.
And she tried to sleep.
* * *
Kiera was vaguely aware of an arm around her and something curled up behind her. Something warm, and she didn’t want to get out of bed. It was nice.
And then the realization hit her that she wasn’t in her bed, because the thing that was curled up against her wasn’t Sif the cat.
She opened one eye, saw Henry’s arm wrapped around her and realized that he was spooning her. She slowly peered over her shoulder and saw that he was still sleeping and that the pillow wall was gone and spread out all over the floor. It felt so good to be wrapped up in his arms and she couldn’t believe how soundly she had slept, but she had to get out of there.
Preferably before Henry woke up and it was all awkward.
She wanted to move, but she also didn’t want to wake him up. She had to think of an easy way to slip out from under his arm without waking him, and she wasn’t quite sure how she was going to do that.
Kiera started shimmying down under the blanket, trying to scoot under the crutch of his arm and the blankets to
the end of the bed, where her plan was then to drop to the floor. As she slowly crept under the covers toward freedom at the end of the bed, she was thankful for the few Pilates classes she had taken.
What she hadn’t counted on was the blankets and sheets still being tightly tucked in at the foot of the bed. And she hadn’t thought there was a footboard on the bed frame, but there was and she was trapped, curled up in a ball at the end of the bed like some kind of freak.
“Um, Kiera?”
“Yeah?” she answered nervously.
Henry peeked under the blanket. “What’re you doing?”
“Trying not to wake you up?” she offered.
He chuckled. “Mission accomplished.”
“Ha-ha.”
He disappeared and rolled away, and she clambered out from under the blankets that were now tangled around her legs.
He’d retreated to his side of the bed.
“So much for your pillow wall.”
“Hey, my pillow walls are usually fantastic.”
He smirked. “I have to say this was a first for me.”
“What, pillow walls?”
“Usually I’m the one sneaking out of the bed in the mornings.”
Heat flushed her cheeks at being caught, but there was a pang of jealousy there, too. The thought of him with someone else. Or multiple someones. And she was surprised over the little green-eyed monster that sprang up.
Why should she care?
This wasn’t a real relationship.
She knew this about him. She knew the kind of women he usually dated.
“Good for you,” she replied sarcastically. What she didn’t tell him was that in the past she had been the one to sneak out of the bed when she slept with a man. The only differences were there hadn’t been many men and it hadn’t happened for a long time.
She didn’t like sleeping over with her dates, but leaving in the morning gave her a chance to leave before they left her.
And with the way she had opened up to Henry, she was in full-on panic mode. She wanted to put some distance between him and herself.
She needed to get back to the hospital.
She had to remember why she was dating Henry, or rather why she was fake dating Henry. It was for the free clinic and those patients who needed her. And last night he’d made her forget all those things.
For one fraction of a second she had thought she was on a real date. She had forgotten what this was all about. It wasn’t real.
And the only reason they had opened up and shared was to keep up the lie.
He was making her lose control, because she didn’t share this stuff with anyone. Not even Mandy.
And that unnerved her. Since she needed to calm herself down and practicing medicine helped her, she needed to get out of there. She needed space.
“Where are you sneaking off to anyways?” he asked.
“I’ve got patients to check up on and some rounds,” she said quickly. “So if the road is open I should get back to the hospital.”
“Okay.” He was lying there on his back, bare chested, so that she could see his finely sculpted chest and abs, his arm behind his head, looking devilishly sexy. The tattoo on his forearm was indeed a tree, but she tried not to stare at it or him, because if she focused too long on him, her stomach would start flipping with anticipation.
She stared at the sheets, instead, the nice Egyptian cotton sheets, until she realized the bed was rumpled as if they had spent the night making love.
A zing of heat coursed through her.
When was the last time she had that kind of release?
It had been too long.
They hadn’t, but the very thought of it made her body react. A rush of blood to her groin, her palms sweaty.
Great. Just great.
Yeah, she had to get out of there—and fast.
Kiera grabbed her clothes. “Thanks for dinner.”
“You mean thanks for not actually poisoning you?” he teased, sitting up.
“Yeah. That. I’ll get dressed and see myself out. Will I see you at the hospital later?”
Henry nodded. “Yes.”
“Okay. Thanks again.” She retreated from the bedroom to the guest bathroom down the hall.
She was quick about getting changed, cleaned up, and once she found her coat and purse she slipped out of the building and into the cold. Outside the snow was deep, but the plow had been by. All she had to do was scrape off her car and head back into town.
She’d get back to work and forget all about how good it had actually felt to wake up in Henry’s arms. And how scared that made her feel.
She was lonely. She knew that, but she could deal with it. She knew how to be alone. She’d been alone most of her life.
She had learned to not rely on anyone.
Except Mandy, but even then, it was Mandy who relied on her.
Does she? She doesn’t really need you as much as you need her.
And the fact she needed Mandy to combat her own loneliness made her sad, but she was so afraid of being hurt again.
Of being left alone.
Of caring for someone and having it taken away.
It was a scary thing to think of, this thing called love.
Oh, God.
Her heart began to race. She needed to get out of there.
This couldn’t be happening to her.
She wouldn’t let it.
* * *
Henry checked on his burn patient in the intensive care unit. The patient was still intubated because the damage to his lungs was too great to try to wean him off the oxygen, but he was stable enough that Henry was able to work on the extensive burns.
He debrided the burns and dressed them again, a lengthy procedure, but he didn’t mind. It was something he often assigned to residents or interns, but they didn’t have those here at Aspen Grace Memorial Hospital, which was okay today. It kept his mind off the fact that he had curled up around Kiera. And the fact that he hadn’t slept so soundly and so well in a very long time.
He hadn’t realized until this morning how much he needed that kind of deep sleep. He had forgotten what it felt like to feel so safe and relaxed with someone. To know that he wasn’t alone in the night.
He’d been a little freaked out to wake up and discover the pillow wall gone and Kiera in his arms, like it was the most natural thing in the world for his unconscious body to seek her out for comfort.
And that he liked it.
A lot.
And how he couldn’t stop thinking about her bottom pressed against him, the shape of her body and how it fitted so well against him.
He couldn’t remember the last time he had slept like that.
Yes, you do. It was when Michelle was alive.
And he realized he hadn’t slept that well in eight years. He’d been a zombie for eight years.
“Dr. Baker?”
He looked up from his work to see a nurse hovering in the door.
“Yes?” he asked, going back to his work.
“Your father is in the boardroom and would like to speak with you. He just called down.”
Henry sighed, annoyed that his father was back in the hospital and intruding where he didn’t belong. His father was obsessed with this new hospital, this new private clinic that his father felt would propel him to the pinnacle to his political career and gain him a lot of votes. And also make him the most money. His father had no real interest in medicine or saving lives. His father was not a doctor—he was a politician, and it all came down to money.
When Henry had been first tasked with coming here, he couldn’t have cared less, but now things were different.
“Tell him that I will come and see him once I’m done with my patient.”
“Yes, Dr. Baker.”
The nurse disappeared and Henry went back to his work.
He knew his father wouldn’t be happy that he hadn’t jumped and gone to see him straight away, but Henry didn’t care.
And his father could wait. His parents didn’t care about him. And it was about time he stopped caring for them and moved on with his own life.
All his father’s plans for his ridiculously expensive, brand-new private hospital could wait. He really didn’t have time for them today.
His father always expected him to jump when he wanted. Henry was not going to jump. Not this time. Even though his father saved him from his reckless life after Michelle died, he shouldn’t have to owe his father for that.
No parent should ever blackmail their child.
Henry was tired of being embarrassed about it.
He was tired of hiding behind his mistakes.
Henry finished up his work. He checked the vitals of the patient, wrote up his orders and left the intensive care unit.
He didn’t go to see his father; instead, he made his way down to the emergency department to find Kiera. The emergency room was quiet. It wasn’t full of sick people and he couldn’t see Kiera anywhere.
“Have you seen Dr. Brown?” Henry asked a passing triage nurse.
“She’s in the free clinic.”
“The free clinic is open again?” he asked.
“Yes.”
Henry left the emergency room and went through the doors into the free clinic. He spotted some of the hospital’s nurse practitioners and Kiera was at the nurses station charting. She looked up and her cheeks flushed pink when their gazes met.
He smiled at her remembering how she’d felt snuggled up against him.
All warm and cuddly.
What has gotten into you?
“Good morning,” he said, coming to stand by her.
“Good morning, I’m very glad the free clinic is open. I guess I have you to thank.”
“Uh, yeah.” Henry was glad the free clinic was open and that it made Kiera happy. He was shocked that his father had opened it up again. And now he was regretting not going to find out what had changed his father’s mind.