Cat was beginning to feel queasy. For someone she had spent so little time with, how on earth could Mimi see her so clearly?
“Your mother said you’ve been acting out,” Mimi went on, “No, no. I told her you were just reacting.” She lifted her suitcase with surprising strength and tossed it into the back of the farm truck. The suitcase slammed against an assortment of tools, rusty chains, scraps of metal, and whatever else already cluttered the bed of the pick-up.
“Holy shit … good thing there’s nothing breakable in there,” Cat muttered under her breath.
“What’s that?”
“Remind me not to cross you, Mimi … seriously, do you lift?” Cat attempted a lighthearted joke. No one was fooled.
Mimi’s raised eyebrow spoke volumes as she reached to unlock the passenger’s side door. Catie wasn’t sure how to respond to this psychoanalysis, or if she was even expected to. Instead, she remained silent but attentive as she climbed into the old Dodge Ram pickup. Her grandmother had Christmas tree tagging ribbon strewn across the dashboard and the pine needles of Frasier Firs littered the floorboards. It smelled of Christmas and pine sap. Cat knew enough about the Christmas tree business to know that each color of ribbon denoted a specific height range for the trees; so, when it came time to cut, it was easy to see exactly how many 6’–7’ trees they had, and so on. But other than that, Cat was clueless. She wondered again how much she would be expected to help on the farm.
Oh, please God, please, don’t make me work in Christmas trees. Isn’t this exile punishment enough?
“I feel like I need to say this,” Mimi’s voice focused Cat’s attention once more, “The things you were getting away with in New York won’t cut it here. Not that you’ll have time for any of that tomfoolery. Now, I’m not trying to be hard on you, Catie, but your parents specifically expressed that I am to keep you busy. So, between school and helping me on the farm, I think you’ll have enough to keep your mind off of … things.”
“Mimi, I don’t know how much help I’ll be,” Cat tried this approach, “I don’t know anything, at ALL, about Christmas trees.”
“You’ll learn,” Mimi patted her hand. Though her response was short and sweet, the tone in her voice told Cat that there was no room for discussion on the matter. She would be helping on the farm, like it or not.
Cat leaned her head against the window as the truck merged onto 321 North. Maybe she would rest her eyes for a minute or two. She let the heat of the sun warm her cheeks. Maybe Mimi was right, maybe working on a farm would keep her mind off of Landon. Maybe, just maybe.
Cat stood outside of Allen-Stevenson, shifting her feet from one foot to the other. He should be getting out any minute now. And when he did, he would have nowhere to run to, he would have to face her. Landon hadn’t returned Cat’s calls or text messages in over a week, and when he stood her up for their dinner date last night, it had been the last straw.
It had been three months since he’d given her the news of his parent’s divorce, and they’d seen each other less and less. At first, Cat chalked it all up to him needing some alone time to deal with things. But lately she’d begun to suspect something a little more sinister going on in her best friend’s life. A week and a half ago she had finally confronted him about her suspicions. Since that night, they hadn’t spoken.
They’d ordered pizza at Patsy’s on the Upper East Side, the food had arrived, and they were each eating in silence — a phenomenon that had been occurring all too often lately. Landon’s cell phone beeped. Cat watched him glance at the text, delete it, and continue with his food. Mysterious texts were coming more and more these days, with little or no explanation from Landon. She thought at first perhaps it was a girl; however, he’d laugh off that idea. She was pretty certain about what it was now, and was just deciding how best to broach the subject when Landon spoke.
“I just remembered,” he began nonchalantly, “I have a paper to finish by tomorrow, so I don’t think I’ll be able to catch a movie after this.”
“Hmm,” Cat replied with a mouthful of vegetarian pizza, “That’s alright,” she lied. “We’re still on for dinner next Saturday, right? You’re still my date for my International Baccalaureate dinner,” she reminded him.
“Oh, yeah,” he reassured her. Though his tone told her he had completely forgotten.
He quickly jotted it into his Blackberry calendar and the rest of dinner continued as normal.
Cat knew what she had to do. She knew the text he’d received was the reason he wasn’t coming to the movie with her, and not some suddenly remembered term paper. She decided, in that moment, that she wasn’t going to ask him about her suspicions. No, that would only force him into another lie. She would follow him, and when she saw it for herself, she would confront him. He couldn’t lie to her then.
Never in her life had Landon kept something from her. They shared practically everything with each other. This secret he was keeping was surely something Cat would disapprove of. That wasn’t a good sign.
She let him walk her to the theater afterwards. He gave her a quick hug goodbye, and she slipped inside under the pretense of purchasing her ticket. She waited for just a moment before she peered back out the door. When he rounded the corner, she was after him. She had no idea how to follow someone; she had never done it before, let alone to have to follow her best friend. How far behind him should she keep? Should she stay close to the side or try to hide behind the trees that lined the street? She decided walking like a normal human being would be best. Trying to appear all spy-like and slink in the shadows would inevitably make her more conspicuous. She wasn’t very good at being covert.
When he started down the stairs to get on the 6 train, she frowned. This was going to be more difficult than she thought. In an instant, she made up her mind; this was her best friend and no matter what he had gotten himself into, he clearly needed her help to get him out of it. She skipped down the stairs and went through the turnstile, all the while hoping he wouldn’t look back over his shoulder and see her.
She knew she couldn’t get into the same subway car, but she needed to be in the car beside him to see where he got off. This was harder than she thought. She stood behind the metal beam about 20 feet away, hoping that he didn’t already know she was there. When the train approached, she waited for him to get on first, then she slipped into the next car just before the door closed.
She exhaled with relief. So far, her mission was a success. But where was he going? The train made its way downtown, past midtown, past the village, past Spring Street. At Delancey, she saw him step off; she hesitated a second, then stepped off to follow.
The lower East side was once considered a generally gritty neighborhood, but it had become very hip in the restaurant scene in the last ten years. Cat knew her parents frequented Stanton Social with friends, or ‘inoteca on their dates nights, but she had never spent much time down here herself.
She followed him further and further through a maze of small side streets until they were well away from any trendy restaurants or nightclubs. They were somewhere they truly didn’t belong and a sixteen-year-old with any sense would stay clear of. Trash littered the sidewalk and Cat cautiously stepped through it. Her left sandal slipped on some brown sludge leaking from a torn trash bag. The smell of old garbage made her queasy; if any of the mess got onto her feet, she feared she might puke. She had taken so much time to carefully step through the refuse that she had fallen further behind Landon. She would have to pick up the pace so as not to lose sight of him. She saw him round a corner to what appeared to be another smaller alleyway. As she crept up to the corner to cautiously peek her head around, she felt a large hand on her shoulder. Unable to stop herself, she shrieked and looked up to see two intimidating men staring at her far too intently to have been thinking any benevolent thoughts.
“Hey, Mami,” came the Puerto Rican accent of the one who still had
a firm grip on her shoulder, “You look lost. I think we can help you find your way, no?”
The looks that passed between them terrified Cat far more than the words they spoke. She wished with all her might she was wearing something more than the short sundress she had on. She pulled her cardigan together across her chest.
“Yeah, honey, why don’t you let us help you out? I could take you places you have never been before,” the other added, his Jersey brogue barely discernible under his slurred speech.
The first, with his hand still firmly planted on her shoulder, pushed her against the wall. She opened her mouth to scream but no sound came. A million thoughts ran through her head at once. She remembered the things to do if ever attacked: scream “fire,” kick them in the groin, hit the base of your palm against their nose as hard as possible, or gouge their eyes. Mentally, she ran over the list, but remained thoroughly frozen in fear. She knew it had only been a few seconds since they had advanced on her, but it seemed like forever.
“Nice dress,” the Jersey voice added. He was close, too close. She could smell the alcohol on his breath. His hand touched the hem of her dress; she felt his filthy fingers move to her thigh. She closed her eyes, her hands in fists, immobile by her sides.
“Please,” she was able to get out through her clenched teeth.
“Mami, it’s all good,” the other smiled, advancing.
“She’s with me,” it was the voice of her savior that made the men release her from their grasp.
Cat’s eyes flickered open, but she could not make them meet Landon’s. She was afraid of what she might see there.
“Sure man, sure. You get what you came for? Frosty makes a good deal, right?” The second man slurred his words together at the end, “You get a taste bag?”
Landon nodded, not looking at Cat.
“We didn’t know she was with you. Sorry, Mami,” he added, “I don’t harass customers.”
Her assailants backed away and continued up the alley and disappeared behind the door Landon had just come out of. Her heart was pounding so loudly she was certain Landon could hear. Is this what a heart attack feels like? She rubbed her left arm just to be sure there weren’t any shooting pains. Physically, she seemed to be alright. But she couldn’t stop shaking. They stood in silence; neither one able to meet the other’s eyes, both ashamed of what they had done.
Landon finally broke the stillness by placing both hands firmly on her shaking shoulders, “Let’s get out of here.”
Cat nodded. She was still trembling as he led her out of the alley, down a few side streets, until they reached a main avenue.
There was only silence and the reassuring, super-glue grip on her hand until they were safely in a cab and headed uptown.
“Did they … hurt you?” Landon’s voice quietly inquired. It was full of remorse.
“No, I’m fine,” came Cat’s terse reply.
“Cat, I’m sorry,” she knew he wasn’t just apologizing for what happened with the men.
“Why, Landon? Why in the hell are you doing this to yourself?” she began to cry.
His arms wrapped around her automatically. The cabby’s eyes flickered back at them in the rearview mirror for a brief second, it went unnoticed.
“You scared the shit out of me back there, Cat. You shouldn’t have followed me. Don’t you know what could’ve happened to you if I hadn’t come out when I did?”
She sobbed harder.
“I don’t do this often, I swear,” he attempted to assure her. “It’s just, everything that’s happened with my parents, I need to escape every now and then, you know. Take the edge off a bit. I know that’s no excuse.”
“Damn right, that’s no excuse!” she cut him off. Her hand slapped across his cheek before she even realized what it had done. They both sat stunned for a moment. Cat grabbed the hand that had lashed out and held it tightly as though it didn’t belong to her. How could she hurt the person she cared about most? What had come over her?
“I — I,” Landon stammered, making her feel 10,000 times worse than she already did. “I just tried it the first time a few months ago at one of Samuel’s parties. I really hardly ever do it. This is for his party in a couple of weeks, it’s not all for me,” he said defensively, holding up the bag of coke. The cabby cleared his throat. Landon glanced at the cabby and quickly hid it back in his backpack.
“This is not you, Landon. This ‘method’ of escaping. It’s stupid. And you’re not stupid.”
His eyes avoided hers. Cat grabbed his face with both of her hands, rubbing the red lines that remained, and stared into the eyes she knew as well as her own.
“Stop, I’m begging you. Stop.”
The cab approached Cat’s townhouse.
“I will, Cat. I’m sorry. I really will,” his voice sounded sincere.
She nodded and leaned over to kiss him on the forehead as she got out of the car.
That had been the last time she’d heard from him. But at least now she knew the truth. At least now she knew what he’d been hiding the last few months. Time to find out if he’s kept his word. The fact that he hadn’t called her back or attended her dinner with her as promised had her severely worried.
The boys started filing out of the building, ties were coming undone left and right, as blue blazers were thrown over their shoulders. Any moment now she would see him. She stood on her tiptoes unnecessarily; with his height, she would easily be able to see him above the rest.
He froze for just a second when he saw her, before continuing towards her sheepishly.
“You skipped class,” he said knowingly.
“Yep,” she confirmed, “Otherwise, how was I going to be here right when you got out? Why weren’t you at my dinner last night? You promised.”
“Oh, shit. Look, Cat. I’m sorry,” the honk of a horn interrupted them, and they both turned to see Landon’s mother in the passenger seat of the town car waiting for him.
“What?” Cat began.
“Grounded,” he replied, “From everything. No phone. Nothing. That’s why I haven’t called or emailed. She wouldn’t even let me call you to cancel last night. The maid found the coke in my drawer and took it to her. She has been acting as my escort to and from school. I even flushed it to prove to her that it’s not a big deal to me. I’m done.”
Cat exhaled, “Well, since that’s the reason for your absence I have to say I’m relieved.”
“You’re happy I’m grounded?”
“No, I’m happy you’ve come to your senses.”
The horned blared absurdly once more.
“Hop in, Cat. We’ll take you home,” he escorted her to the black town car, “I still can’t believe you skipped class to corner me.”
He held the door open for her.
“I have to say Landon, I’m glad I did.”
“Yeah, me too.”
And with that, he slid into the seat beside her.
The horn honked, taking Cat swiftly from her memories, from NYC, and returning her to where she sat in an old gray Dodge Ram with a red farm truck license on the back. She looked around. Mimi pushed the accelerator to the floor to give the old truck enough speed to pass the tourists in front of them.
“Flor-idiots,” she murmured. The term was not a polite one. Though, it was one often used by the locals to describe the summer tourists, many from Florida, who come up to escape the heat in exchange for cool mountain breezes and beautiful scenery. She had heard her grandma say it several times over the years. Cat didn’t blame them; it was gorgeous here.
They began to climb the mountain that bordered Catawba County and Watauga County. The view was incredible. You could see miles and miles of hazy blue mountains giving way to rolling hills far in the distance. There was a time Cat thought of this place as the most beautiful in the world. Now, having traveled quite a bit, she knew
for a fact there was no place lovelier than this. But, under the circumstances, she couldn’t allow herself to enjoy it. She refused, turning her back from the window and the views, and instead, began to count dead stink bugs on the floor board. That was what she deserved now anyways — a stink bug counting existence.
They crossed through the quaint resort town of Blowing Rock; tourists walked from shop to shop, many enjoying an ice cream cone from Kilwins. It was a day worthy of ice cream and soaking in the sun. Maybe even a double scoop kind of day. The beauty of it only seemed to make Cat’s suffering more pronounced. Here she was, being allowed to live on this gorgeous day, while Landon was … no, she wouldn’t think that. Tears started to burn behind her eyes. She pulled out her sunglasses and put them on. At least part of her could hide behind them.
“We’ll be home in about thirty minutes,” her grandmother said happily, drumming the steering wheel like some maniac drummer in a rock band, “Wooo wee! It’s so darn pretty outside. You can’t ask for better weather than this.”
She reached across Cat, while endeavoring to steer, and started rolling down the window.
“Mimi!” Cat yelped, certain this could only end by her running over a pedestrian — likely a small, adorable child, licking a double scoop of ice cream.
“I got it! Let me roll it down,” Cat pushed Mimi’s attention back to the road and vigorously rolled down the window. The July breeze swept into the truck. It was blissful. Ugh.
“I thought I would take you to dinner tonight. Would you like that, Catie?”
“Fine,” Cat replied with as much enthusiasm as she could muster.
“There’s Mellow Mushroom. I know how you like their pizza,” Mimi judged her response, “Or there’s always Outback, if you’re in the mood for steak. Or there’s a little vegetarian place called Angelica’s you might like.”
“That’s fine. Anywhere is fine, Mimi,” Cat cut in, before Mimi had time to suggest another place. Cat couldn’t care less where they ate, and she doubted that Mimi really cared, either. She knew it was her way of showing her love and concern. And for her sake, Cat would pretend that it made a difference.
What Cat Lost (The Last Life of Cat Book 1) Page 3