by Melissa Haag
“Fine.”
We left the caves, but rather than going straight home, Fenris drove us to his cabin. My teeth chattered the whole way, part of the reason he’d insisted on driving and the cabin.
“Are you going to let me carry you?” he asked when we reached the end of the road.
“N-nope. You already h-had your daily affection. T-too much will go to your h-head.”
“Doesn’t count. I didn’t hug you back,” he said with a grin.
I rolled my eyes and got out of the car. We both knew that was a lie. He’d definitely hugged me. Maybe not at the same time I hugged him, but it didn’t matter. I knew if I gave in now, it would become a game with him. For whatever reason, Fenris was a very touchy-feely kind of person.
He led the way to the cabin, glancing back at me constantly. I tried not to begrudge the steam rolling off his exposed torso. Or stare at all the muscled flesh on display. Thankfully, I had enough to distract me.
With my wet hair, I couldn’t keep myself warm enough; and my teeth were clicking together with increasing force. I didn’t lie and try to tell him I was fine. I was freezing and wanted to get inside quickly. However, I didn’t give in and ask for help, either.
When the small building came into sight, Fenris jogged ahead. I entered a minute later to the crackle of a fire just getting started. Using my hip, I closed the door and shuffled to the chair.
“You never said. After the last time I was here, did anyone find this place?” I asked.
“Nope. It’s still my secret hideout from the ladies,” he said with a grin. “Well, the rest of the ladies. Do you want something to drink or eat?”
My hunger lifted its head, and I glanced away from him as he straightened.
“No, I’m fine. Thank you.”
He sighed.
“We’ve already established the opposite. There’s no need to be polite about it.” He claimed the chair near mine. “Have you ever considered feeding from me?”
My eyes nearly popped from my head as I turned to look at him. He chuckled.
“The idea shouldn’t be that shocking. It’s not like I’m suggesting sex,” he said. “You said I smell good, and we’ve proven that I don’t turn into a Eugene junior when you hug me. What if I’m like Mrs. Quill, and you could feed from me without any issues?”
I was shaking my head before he finished.
“Oh, there would be issues, Fenris. Lots of issues. Your resistance to me is hypothetical, and I don’t ever want to test it. It wouldn’t be safe.”
He studied me for a moment then looked at the flames.
“Fine. But if Mrs. Quill is immune, others could be as well. You should ask your mom that, too. I don’t like the idea of you going hungry.”
I reached over and patted his hand that was resting on the arm of his chair.
“Don’t worry. It’ll be fine. Once my hair dries, I’ll talk to Mom like you suggested. If she reacts like I think she will, I’ll be feeding on humans in New York tonight.”
Saying it made me feel dead inside. I really hoped Fenris was right and Mom would listen.
“And if she accepts what you say, will you go back to feeding from Mrs. Quill?”
The immediate surge of resentment I felt at the idea worried me. Would I be able to go back to feeding that way? I wasn’t so sure I’d be able to forgive her abandonment of me.
I walked into the house, struggling between my desire to turn around and leave again and my need to reclaim my life. Fenris’s parting words helped bolster my courage and kept me moving forward.
“Go show them how strong you really are,” he’d said. “And when you’re done making them cry, I’m here for as many hugs as you need.”
I pressed the intercom and listened to the click of it echo through the house.
“Mom, I’d like to speak to you in the kitchen, please.”
Releasing the button, I claimed a seat at the island and waited. The location was strategic. She would need to come to me, not the other way around. And it was close to my car if I needed to take off again.
The thought had barely left me when the door to the garage opened.
“Hello, Eliana,” Adira said.
I frowned at her.
“What were you doing in the garage?”
“Oh, last week, I noticed your paint had some heat damage. I haven’t had a chance to address it. When I saw you come, I took the opportunity.”
“You fixed it?”
“No, I transported the car to someone who can.”
“You took my car?”
It didn’t matter that I hadn’t paid for it or that she’d been the one to give it to me. It was my car. My only means of escaping this house not on foot.
“Only for a few days. You won’t even miss it.”
I strove to find the words to adequately convey my hate of her manipulative nature. Before what I felt could spill forward, Mom walked in.
“Baby, you had us all worried,” she said, coming to me and giving me a tight hug. She pulled back to look at me.
“You’re shaking.”
“Yeah. I’m angry.” I pulled out of Mom’s arms. “Adira took my car.”
Mom glanced at Adira then back at me.
“She said it was damaged and that she wanted to fix it. I didn’t think you’d mind since we plan to be out of town for a few days.”
“A few days?”
I closed my eyes and took a calming breath. Losing my cool now wouldn’t help me.
When I opened my eyes again, Mom was watching me with concern.
“Do I have any choice?” I asked. “At all? I’m given what to wear. Told how to behave. Now, I’m being forced to feed. Forced when you promised you would never force me.”
“Sweetie, I’m not going to force you. I’m taking you to New York to show you how I feed in the real world. Feeding in Uttira is like fishing in a barrel. I can understand why you find it repulsive.”
“No, you don’t understand. I’m repulsed by what we do to the humans we feed from. Not during, but after. We ruin their lives, Mom. Erasing their memories doesn’t make it better. Go watch any of your playthings from this past week and see what they’re doing now.
“They’ll be moving around like normal, but something will be off. And if you’re brave enough to ask them, they’ll tell you they don’t know what’s wrong. That they feel like they’re missing something. Something important. Something big. Something life-changing. They’ll be missing you, Mom. You. And you aren’t even thinking of them. It doesn’t go away. For the rest of their lives, they’ll be craving you, unhappy in any relationship because it’s not you. And they won’t even understand why.
“I don’t want to be a part of that. I don’t want to make slaves of humans.”
Mom gently squeezed my arms.
“Baby, it’s not like that. We bring humans more pleasure than they can possibly achieve on their own. It’s a magical experience. One they would give anything to repeat. Of course, they’re going to miss that and want it back.”
“Human addicts miss cocaine, too. That doesn’t mean it’s good for them.”
She cupped my face.
“Baby, listen to me. We are not a drug. We are gifts waiting to be given to those who are worthy. I promise you’ll see that in New York.”
I stared at her as my anger and resentment shriveled into a ball of numb acceptance.
“Fine. Take me, then. Show me how to feed and watch my self-loathing deepen. I hate what I am, and I hate what you want me to do. And if it’s a choice between hurting others or hurting myself, I’d rather starve.”
I pulled from her hands and started to leave the kitchen.
“Where are you going?” Adira asked.
I turned back to look at her. She hadn’t moved during my conversation with my mother.
“My room. Or am I not allowed that small freedom anymore?”
“Of course you are,” Mom said. She looked at Adira. “Bring her car back or find her anothe
r one while hers is being repaired. She’s not a prisoner.”
I left them both, no longer caring about the car. Adira had proven her point. She controlled me. Mom might not see it yet, but she would eventually. And, it would probably be right after Adira had manipulated her into forcing me to feed.
Closing my door behind me, I paced my room and paused to look at myself in the mirror. If only Adira hadn’t been the first one in the kitchen. Her presence and the removal of my car had doomed any chance of a rational exchange with my mom. One where I would have had the chance to ask about the odd reflections I’d glimpsed or ask if there were other races I could safely feed from.
The murmur of voices in the hall drew me to my door.
“Every time I listen to you, I get more push back from her. I’m done. Return the car or I will find it myself. I have nothing better to do with my evening than wander Uttira looking for it. Do we understand each other?”
“I understand you very well, Nicolette,” Adira said. “Try not to forget that I’m the reason you’re here.”
The intercom clicked, and Mrs. Quill’s voice rang out, asking Adira to come to the study immediately.
“Awful bitch,” Mom muttered before her door closed.
I opened my door and debated which was more pressing. Speaking to my Mom alone or finding out what had Mrs. Quill calling for her sister in such a worried tone?
Mrs. Quill and my fear for Ashlyn won. I ran quietly down the hall and stopped by Mr. Quill’s office door. At first, I couldn’t make out what was being said. Then a voice, angry and female, came through clearly.
“Enough,” Megan said sharply.
“We acknowledge that you were unable to sense his wickedness, but that doesn’t absolve us of our obligation to determine what he is planning to do with all that life energy,” Adira said.
“From now until the end of time, Oanen belongs to me,” Megan said, her voice ringing with the full power of a fury. “Any task he chooses to perform on behalf of the Council, he does with me at his side. And since I have spent time with Zayn Sias and have found him to be completely without any trace of wickedness, I will not waste my time tracking him down. Casting spells with life energy is not against the laws of Mantirum or mankind. Your persistence in finding the druid seems unusually driven. I think, perhaps, I would like to question you about that as well as your insistence in naming Nicolette Barchim guilty of a crime she was proven not to have committed.”
I grinned and pressed my cheek closer to the wood.
“We understand your warning,” Adira said. “Congratulations on your ascension, Fury.”
“Thanks, Adira. We’ll see you soon.”
“Soon?” Adira said, letting her panic show. “What do you mean?”
There was a pause then someone swore.
“We cannot afford to have her return,” Mr. Quill said. “Not yet.”
“No, you’re right,” Adira agreed. “Everything would be chaos if she returned now.”
I smirked at the fear in Adira’s voice. It was about time she realized she couldn’t push everyone around.
“Is there any word from Raiden on the missing human, Ashlyn?” Mrs. Quill asked.
“Nothing,” Adira said. “We have a choice to make. Employ a druid to attempt a locator spell or let the Fury start questioning people when she returns.”
“You know what will happen if she goes out seeking the wicked here,” Mr. Quill said. “Many of our young will die because of mistakes made in ignorance or plain stupidity.”
“What do we do, then?” Mrs. Quill asked.
“If we can’t find a way to stall her, we encourage Megan and Oanen to come here to visit you,” Adira said.
“Here?”
“Nicolette won’t be able to resist a newly mated pair. Hopefully, her hunger will keep them distracted long enough for us to find the missing girl and spare some innocent lives because I highly doubt whatever happened to Ashlyn was wicked enough for a trip to hell.”
I hurried away from the door, retracing my steps while my mind raced. I’d wanted Megan back for so long that I’d never stopped to think what that might mean. Especially with Mom here and Ashlyn missing. Adira was right in that Mom would have a hard time resisting a new couple’s lust. But more than that, what would a new fury think about a best friend who illegally hired underage druids?
In my room, I lay on my bed and wondered how I’d deal with this new problem. Outside, the light gradually faded.
A cool breeze caressed my cheek a moment before lips pressed against my skin.
“My sweet girl,” Mom said.
“Is it time to go already?” I said, forcing myself to sit up. “What do you want me to wear?”
She made a sound between upset and annoyed at my toneless questions.
“She really has broken your spirit, hasn’t she?” Mom asked.
“Who?”
“Adira.”
I shrugged.
“She doesn’t ever work alone.”
Mom took my hand in hers.
“We’ll skip New York tonight and wait a few days until you’re ready,” she said.
“A few days won’t change how I feel, Mom. I know how to feed, or are you forgetting the month I spent with you on our way here? Why do you think I wanted to stay here alone with the Quills so badly? I don’t like your version of feeding. I was fine before you came here.”
“You weren’t fine, sweetie. You were dying.”
“But I’m not anymore, right?”
“It’s hard to say. Yes, you seem a little better, but for how long when you’re refusing to eat?”
“I’m not refusing to eat. I am forbidden from eating my way.”
“All right then. I propose we meet in the middle. You continue to feed your way, but you give me a chance to show you that my way isn’t as evil as you think it is.”
I thought of feeding off of Mrs. Quill and knew I couldn’t go back to that. But Fenris had brought up a good point. There had to be others.
“Okay,” I said.
She kissed my cheek and left me alone, feeling like I’d just made a deal with the devil.
Chapter Twenty
The ringing of my phone interrupted my favorite dream. With a fair amount of longing, I watched my cakes disappear from existence before I opened my eyes.
Burrowing deeper under my covers, I stretched out a hand to snatch my phone and pull it into my warm cocoon with me.
“Hey, Megan,” I answered sleepily after a glance at the number.
“Hey. Sorry I didn’t call sooner. It’s been crazy.”
“I heard,” I said with a smile. “You ruffled some feathers with your Oanen-is-mine speech.”
“Good. They need to stop toying with people.”
“Agreed.”
“Good news, though. Oanen and I are heading back to Uttira today. Well, as soon as we find his car,” she said.
I sat up in bed.
“Um, you might want to rethink that.”
“What? Finding his car?”
“No. Coming back to Uttira.” It hurt saying the words, but it was the only safe way I could think of for both of us. At least until Ashlyn was found.
“Don’t you love me anymore?” Her playful words didn’t completely hide the subtle hurt in her tone, and my heart ached for us both.
“Like crazy. And that’s why I want you to go somewhere else for a while. Somewhere romantic and amazing where you and Oanen can do all the new couple things you’re probably already doing. When you get it out of your system, you can come back.”
She was quiet for a moment.
“Are you afraid of being around us?” she asked.
“Yes and no. I’d be fine with one of you at a time. But, wanting you to stay away has more to do with my mom. New couples are too tempting. You give off too much energy.”
“You mean sexual energy.”
“Yes. That. And with Mom being pregnant, I just don’t want to worry about you.”
&n
bsp; “How long do we need to stay away?” she asked.
“Mom’s due in five months, but I don’t think it’ll take that long for your new, um…attraction to wear off.”
The phone changed hands, and Oanen spoke.
"Eliana, Megan needs to see you as much as you need to see her. We’ll stay away for two weeks. Then we’re coming home.”
The phone was passed back to Megan, but I barely registered the rest of the conversation. All I could think of was that I had two weeks. Two weeks to get rid of Mom to protect Megan and Oanen from Mom feeding on them when they came home. Two weeks to find Ashlyn to ensure my best friend wouldn’t send me to hell the moment she saw me.
While Megan’s return would be dangerous for Megan and bad for me, the imminent threat of her arrival was the best thing that could happen for Ashlyn. Finding Ashlyn, with no help from the missing druids, would be impossible. I didn’t have the nose to hunt her scent down or the magic to locate her. However, Adira would do everything within her power to find the missing girl quickly. Even hire a druid.
With Adira working on Ashlyn, I could focus on removing Mom. But how? My first attempt to banish her from Uttira had been a complete botch job, so much so that I wasn’t about to try magic again. I saw only two possible remaining options. Well, only one really, because forcing her to leave through physical means would be as pointless an endeavor as using magic. That left appealing to her.
Lost in thought, I got out of bed, closed the window that was somehow open again, and quickly got ready for the day.
Even though talking to Mom had failed miserably yesterday, I needed to try again. Only this time, I would approach her from a different angle. She didn’t want me to feel controlled, so perhaps proposing weekly check-ins would work.
Optimistic, I left my room to speak with her. However, her room was empty. As was the entertainment room.
Hoping she hadn’t made good on her threat to walk around Uttira to find my car, I went downstairs. The clink of silverware drew me to the dining room.
Despite Mom’s earlier assertion that we should drop the pretext of needing human food, she had a plate before her piled with pastries. She noticed me and smiled.