The Inner Self: The Prophecy

by Raqurra Ishmar

  I hop in bed, leaning over to pull out some melatonin gummies to help me fall, and stay, asleep.

  “Oh, you’re serious tonight, huh?”

  “You damn right I am. You’re getting stronger and I don’t want you to ruin this.”

  “Ruin what?”

  “Whatever that I can have with the brothers.”

  “If it wasn’t for me, you never would’ve had that little bathroom tryst.”

  “Touché.”

  As the gummies magic start kicking in, I snuggle down deeper into my soft pillows, excited to welcome a dreamless sleep. Before drifting off into unconsciousness, I realize that my dad never texted me back.

  8

  Renee

  I race down the hallway, rushing to find my mother. I need to find my mother. My father’s last words to me were to find her, and I can’t let him down. Not again. I trip over the skirt of my dress, falling to the stone floor and barely catching myself with my hands. I gasp for air, struggling to tamper down the panic that’s rising in my chest. Mom, where are you?!

  I push myself off of the floor, not wanting to waste anymore time. I grab the skirt of my dress and I continue to sprint, running blindly but determinedly to an unknown destination. The lamps flickering along the hall causes macabre shadows to dance across the walls. My heart beats a strange staccato, as if it’s pushing me harder and harder to find my mother.

  “We have to find her,” Shaye whispers in my mind. They’ve been quiet this whole time, but I can feel their panic mingling with mine.

  “I know we do,” I say back, not able to speak out loud due my overexertion. I turn right down another long corridor, and my hope of finding my mother dwindles more and more.

  “The King has her,” they say. “We know that he does! Hurry to his chambers, Ren! We’re running out of time!”

  I sprint down another corridor, realizing that Shaye is absolutely right. As I near the King’s chamber, I run into a group of guards.

  “Shaye!”

  “I’m on it!” they yell, merging into my mind and taking over my body. They immediately hit the group of guards with a wall of electricity, taking them down with barely a thought. Shaye rushes forward, tapping each of them with our hand and forcing them to remain unconscious.

  “Should I stay in control?” Shaye asks.

  “Yes, I have yet to master any of your power. If we have any chance of saving Mom, we’ll need you.”

  “I will not fail either of you. You have my word.”

  With Shaye in charge, we make our way down the corridor at a faster speed than when I was running. We haven’t had long to train together, with our bond just manifesting almost a year ago. Our bond will solidify on my eighteenth year, but until then, only one of us are allowed to be in charge at a time.

  “Focus, Ren! We can talk about our bond after we save her!”

  “You’re right, I am sorry.”

  Shaye pauses before a huge door, hesitant to just barge in there without knowing whether or not Mom is in there; until we hear a scream. Mom’s scream. Shaye barges into the room with a ball of lightning held in one hand and a ball of fire in the other, and both energies dissipate at the sight before us. Mom’s eyes are bright red, showing that she and her Inner Self are merged together. Her curly hair is wild atop her head, but that’s not what caused us to pause.

  It was the blood pooling on the floor.

  I gasp awake, completely confused about who I am and where I’m at. My pulse is still thundering and my heart is heavy with grief.

  “What was that?” Sheya asks. But I can’t answer them, because I have no idea what it was that just happened. Was that a dream? And if it was, where did it come from?

  “A King? And why was my name changed if that was us,” Sheya asks.

  “Your name was changed, but mine wasn’t. So maybe I just like calling you Shaye? Kind of sounds better than Sheya.”

  “No, Sheya is my name. It fits me. Whoever you thought that was in your dream, it was something else.”

  “Something or someone? If that was me, then that had to of been you.”

  “Whatever it was, you’re going to be late to school.”

  I look over to my alarm clock and I see that Sheya’s right. If I don’t get dressed and out the door within the next fifteen minutes, I’m going to be really late. But how can I really care about school when that dream is still resonating in my mind like that?

  What is really bothering me, is the complete synchrony between dream Ren and Shaye. They were almost one and the same person. I didn’t feel any animosity between them and the easy way that Ren let Shaye take over, I just don’t understand. Why would she be ok with giving up control like that? And Shaye was ok with giving it back if Ren wanted it. Was that just wishful thinking or is that something that could actually happen between me and Sheya?

  “Dream on,” Sheya says. But I can’t help but feel the same longing coming from them that’s coming from me. Maybe it’s not something that’s so terrible, if we weren’t at war with each other all the time. I never thought it was possible to be friends with Sheya, but after feeling the bond between dream Ren and Shaye, I kind of want that.

  I pull into the school parking lot right as the final warning bell rings. I rush to my first period class, not even realizing who I’m about to see until I’m huffing and puffing my way into the classroom. I throw Mr. Carmichael an apologetic smile and quickly take the closest seat to the front. Mr. Carmichael raises his eyebrows at me, probably because I’m not in my usual seat. The reason behind my seat change is staring a hole in the back of my head right now.

  “You’re being a pussy,” Sheya says.

  “I don’t know what to do! After that little make-out session, how do I even look him in the eyes?”

  “Easy. Simply just look at him.”

  “Yeah, that’s easy for you, because you’re the reason why I’m in this mess.”

  “Well, we don’t know if the effects are long lasting. He may just be back to normal.”

  “Yeah, well, I don’t want to stick around and find out.”

  I tune back into the lesson that Mr. Carmichael is giving, making sure that I don’t fall behind in my schoolwork. I’ve already completed weeks of homework for him, but tests are something different. When the bell rings to dismiss us, I gather my things and I just sit and wait. Everything in me is saying that I should bulldoze my way out of the classroom, but I want to see how it feels to be in sync with Sheya, so I’ll be taking their advice for once.

  When all of the kids have left the room, Mr. Carmichael gives me another searching look and then tosses one to the boy behind me. I push out a sigh and stand up to leave. We don’t have much time before we have to be to our next class, so I walk fast down the hall. He catches up to me and walks silently by my side. Before I can muster anything, he reaches out and squeeze my hand. “I’m sorry,” he quietly says before walking away.

  “Well, that was anticlimactic,” Sheya says.

  I don’t have a response to them, because my heart is thundering in my ears and I can’t seem to get past the way his voice sounded in my ear. He probably thinks I hate him. I’d think I hated him, too. I want to race after him, but the warning bell rings and I have to head to my next class.

  Second period flashes by in the blink of an eye and I run over to my locker, waiting for Cymone. She quickly jogs over, eyes wide and full of excitement. “Did you see Titus?” she asks.

  “Yeah, kind of. We have first period together. I kind of sat in the front of the classroom to avoid him,” I sheepishly say.

  “You what?” she screeches.

  “Yeah, I don’t know what got into me. When I decided to woman up and talk to him, he squeezes my hand and apologizes. What do I do?”

  “Um, well are you mad at him?”

  “No, I’m just kind of embarrassed.”

  “Well, I know what you need to do.”

  “What?” I ask desperately.

  “Act like nothing
has happened,” she shrugs. “Unless you want to talk to him about what happened, I say just pretend that it doesn’t bother you. I mean, he’ll know it does, since you went out of your way to not sit by him, but if you act like it doesn’t bother you, maybe he’ll feel better.”

  Even though her plan sounds a little crazy, I don’t have much of a choice but to go along with it. I mean, I tried the whole Sheya thing, and that just left me feeling guilty. Granted, it wasn’t really their plan to have Titus apologize, but still.

  We make our way into the cafeteria, and I avert my eyes from our typical table. I know that the guys are sitting there and I don’t have the balls to look at them yet. Not only am I nervous about talking to Titus, but I’m also nervous to see Caylen. Especially after his comment about wishing he was in the bathroom with me and his brother.

  After waiting in line and grabbing our food, we head over to our table.

  “Head up, shoulders back,” Sheya says.

  I listen to what they say, fixing my posture and making eye contact with the two guys at the table. My heart sinks when I notice that Titus is not sitting there. I sit down with Cymone and I flash the guys my best smile.

  “Hey guys. Where’s Titus?” Cymone asks.

  Zavid and Caylen share a look before Zavid looks back at us. His brown eyes drink me in for a second, before he flashes them over to Cymone. “Titus believes that you would rather he not share lunch with you.”

  I swallow audibly, knowing that it’s me that he’s talking about. “No, I would love for him to eat with us. I’m actually sad about him not sitting here,” I say honestly.

  I glance over at Caylen, seeing his blue eyes light up at my confession. He pulls out his phone and shoots off a text, probably to let Titus know that I’m ok with him sitting with us.

  He walks through the cafeteria door and sits down next to Caylen and makes eye contact with me.

  “Don’t break eye contact,” Sheya hisses. I’m glad they said something, because I was about to look away. I force a smile onto my face, hoping that it looks genuine instead of pained.

  “Hey, Titus. I’m glad you decided to sit with us,” I say.

  He holds my eyes for longer than normal, before nodding at me. And that’s it. Oookay.

  “So,” Cymone cuts in, breaking the awkward silence. “What are you guys plans for this weekend?”

  “Well,” Caylen says. “Renee promised that she’d go to this party with us tomorrow.”

  Cymone opens her mouth, probably to curse me out for not telling her, but I speak before she does. “I didn’t promise that I’d go. I said I’d ask my mom and see if she’ll let me.”

  “And did you ask her?” Zavid inquires.

  “Well, no. She wasn’t home last night and she wasn’t up this morning when I left.”

  “So, just text her,” Caylen interjects.

  “Yeah, I guess that’s an option.” I whip out my phone and quickly type out a text to my mom.

  Me: Hey Mom.

  “So, how did you guys hear about a party this weekend before I did?” Cymone asks. I tune into their conversation as I wait for my mom to respond.

  Mom: Hey Baby. Everything alright?

  Me: Yeah, everything is fine. I wanted to see if I could go to a party this weekend with Cymone.

  I leave out the fact that the boys are coming, because I kind of want her to say yes.

  “We know about the party because we’re the ones that’s throwing it,” Titus says, finally gracing us with his voice.

  “What? You’re throwing it?” I ask while shooting an accusing glance at Caylen. “Someone said that you overheard someone talking about it, not that you’re the ones that’s throwing it.”

  “I guess it must have slipped my mind,” Caylen says while shrugging.

  Mom: Yes Baby, that’s fine. I’ll be working on call all weekend, so it’s good for you to have some company.

  “Well, good news. My mom said that it ’s ok for me to go to your party.”

  “Great. Dad is out of town for the weekend, so it’s going to be pretty epic,” Caylen says.

  “Isn’t it amazing when things work out like this?” Cymone asks.

  Everyone nods their agreement before tucking into their food. I toss searching glances at Titus, wanting to talk to him and also wanting to act like none of this matters. But I can’t get over the way he apologized to me. I don’t know exactly how bad he thought he messed up, but it wasn’t really all that bad. I’d even go as far as to say that I’d be open to doing it again, in a better setting, of course.

  “Let me free and I can make it happen,” Sheya says.

  “I want it to be authentic, not something that’s the byproduct of magic.”

  “Beggars can’t be choosers.”

  “Good thing I’m not begging, huh?”

  The bell rings and we all get up to head out of the cafeteria. I react before I have a chance to talk myself out of it. I grab Titus’ hand, pulling him back so that we fall behind the group. Cymone tosses a confused look over her shoulder, but I wave her forward. Caylen smiles before giving me a wink. I turn my attention back to Titus, knowing that I don’t have much time to talk to him, but needing him to know how I truly felt.

  “I’m not mad at you,” I say to him. “I sat in the front of class because I’m a little embarrassed by what we did. Not because I didn’t want it, but because we barely know each other and we were in the girl’s bathroom at school. I just want you to know that there isn’t anything that you have to apologize for and I’m not mad at you. Ok?”

  His grey eyes search mine for a second, probably trying to see if I’m full of shit or not. He reaches out and pulls me into his strong arms. A squeak escapes me from the sudden action and I barely catch myself against his chest before his arms encircle me. I almost forget the other kids around us, but not fully enough to melt into his embrace.

  “Thank you, Renee. If the only thing that’s stopping us from freely being around each other is the lack of familiarity, then I will build that bond with you,” he says before placing a soft kiss on my forehead and walking away. What’s with him always leaving me speechless?

  “Who says things like ‘I will build that bond with you’? That sounds a little weird, doesn’t it?” Sheya asks.

  “It is strange that we hear that word again after it was tossed in our dream a couple of times.”

  “Whatever it may be, it seems that you gave him hope.”

  Did I give him hope? And does it really matter that I did? Maybe, in a way, I gave myself hope. Hope to have more than what I’ve ever really thought I wanted.

  9

  Renee

  It’s the day of the party and the school day has gone by faster than ever. Cymone is coming over in the next hour so that we can get dressed and head to the party together. Caylen sent me their address earlier, and they live not too far from where I am. Actually, they live over in the rich part of town. I can’t wait to see what their house looks like.

  I hop in the shower, taking my time to make sure that everything that needs to be shaved, is shaved. I’m a little nervous about this party, if I’m honest with myself. I have a strange feeling in my chest that something big is going to happen tonight.

  “I don’t think that premonitions is part of my arsenal,” Sheya says.

  “We don’t know about everything that you’re capable of. The you in my dream was able to knock someone out with a touch, produce fire and lightning. Have you done that yet? No.”

  “And, once again, how do you know that was me?”

  “I don’t know. I just feel like that was more than a dream, and that you’re capable of more than we know. ”

  “Either way, I would be able to know about having premonitions.”

  “Who knows, maybe I have abilities outside of you.”

  “By all means, please, see the future,” they quip.

  “I’m not saying that I could. I’m just telling you that I have a bad feeling about tonight. Don’t you
?”

  “No, I think that we’re going to have so much fun. It’s going to be spectacular.”

  “Gee, you can tone down on the sarcasm.”

  “And you can try to have more fun. Let go and enjoy the night.”

  “Hey Hoe! I’m here!” Cymone calls out from downstairs. She scares the shit out of me when she appears unannounced like that. I know she has the key to the house and all, but a little heads up would’ve been fine too. I hop out of the shower and wrap myself in my favorite fluffy towel.

  “I’m upstairs in the bathroom!” I call out before opening the bathroom door. She’s jogging up the stairs by the time I step fully into the hallway. She gives me a once over before rolling her eyes.

  “Girl! I thought you’d be in your underwear by the time I got here. Look at you, wrapped in a towel like a mummy. I guess if you wanted a head start on being a hoe tonight, this would be the perfect attire for all of that,” she says cheekily.

  “No, stupid,” I slap her upside her head while walking into my room. “I was actually making sure that these legs were as smooth as yours so that you don’t try to show me up tonight.”

  “What? How can my short legs show you up? If anything, I’ll need to grow an extra inch or so to be able to even be noticed standing next to you.”

  “Yeah yeah yeah. So what are you wearing tonight? I was thinking of just throwing on some shorts and a nice tank top and calling it a day.”

  “Oh hell no, you’re going to have to put a little effort into your attire tonight! Aren’t you trying to get three of the hottest guys on the planet into your bed?!”

  “I wouldn’t say all of that.”

  “Regardless, you have to show up and show out tonight. It’s the first party of the school year and you’re the captain of the basketball team. We have to start our senior year off right!”

  “Ok, so what do you suggest I wear?” I sigh, knowing that I’m going to be uncomfortable tonight.

  A sly smile pulls at her lips and I resign myself to being her little doll for the night.