“That was amazing,” I say instead. He stares intently at me, as if there’s something he wants to say to me. Instead, he leans forward and places the softest kiss against my lip.
“I’ll make sure that I was worth it, Renee. I promise.”
“There’s nothing else for you to do, Titus. You’re more than worth it to me.” I twine my arms around his neck and pull him into a deep kiss. Hoping that he can feel the sincerity in my body. His dick grows hard inside of me while we kiss, and I gasp into his mouth. “Again?” I ask.
“Again,” he says while moving inside of me, slow this time. He drops my legs so that my feet are planted on the floor. He places kisses all over my face as he slowly drives my body closer to the edge. Whereas our first time was full of carnal desire, this time has a deeper feeling in it. Almost as if he wants to tell me something that he can only do with his body.
His strokes are slow but powerful, picking up in speed and intensity the closer he gets to the edge. He places his face in the crook of my neck, moaning into my ear and turning me on even more. Snaking his hand between us, he presses his thumb against my clit and I’m instantly seeing stars. I feel as if my soul is trying to reach out to his. The orgasm building up inside of me feels as if it’s building from every pore in my body.
“Titus,” I breathe out. “Please, please don’t stop.”
“I won’t. Not until you cum,” he grounds out, increasing his pace until I can barely breathe. He grunts against my neck as I tighten up around him, calling out his name. “Shit,” he moans, finishing inside of me before collapsing beside me. I can barely catch my breath after everything that we’ve just done. It feels as if we merged together.
“So,” I breathe out. “That was sex?”
“Yeah,” he chuckles. “That was sex.”
“I’m glad I waited. I don’t think it would have been that amazing with anyone else.” I turn to my side so that I can look at him in all of his naked glory. I lazily drag my hand along his abs, tracing my fingers through his pubic hair. “I’m sure it wouldn’t have been that amazing.” I lean forward to place a soft kiss against his lips. A warm glow fills my limbs and I can’t help but feel giddy and loved.
“Renee, I…” he trails off, his eyes narrow as if he’s battling with something.
“What?” I whisper. “Did you not like it?”
His eyes widen at my question, cupping my face and kissing me forcefully. “Do you even have to ask? I enjoyed every second of it. And if I didn’t have to worry about my brothers or Dee barging through that door any second, I’d go for round three.”
A goofy smile graces my face at his confession, before dimming again. “Then what’s wrong?” I ask.
“I’m afraid,” he finally admits. “I’m afraid that if you find out what it truly means to be an Unblessed, what we’d do for our families, that you’ll regret this.” The tortured expression on his face causes fury to course through me. How dare the Blessed on this planet make him feel like he’s not worthy?! How dare they make this amazing man second guess himself?
“There’s nothing that would make me regret this,” I vehemently vow. “No matter what, this moment will always be the happiest of my life.”
He wraps me tightly in his arms, kissing my forehead and promising to be everything I think he is. There’s nothing for him to change, he’s perfect the way he is. There’s nothing he could tell me that would make me look at him any differently. Whatever’s bothering him, I’ll wait until he’s ready to tell me. We’ll be able to get through anything.
I just know it.
25
Renee
As we walk back to the festival, it’s almost a little disconcerting how much everything's the same one the outside. But for me, everything has changed. It’s almost like I’m lighter on my feet, the cold doesn’t bother me nearly as much, and it’s almost as if I’m more aware of Titus.
We can barely keep our hands off of each other. Small caresses here, a kiss here, but even through the afterglow, I can’t miss the tightness around his eyes. I hope whatever is haunting him will go away so that we can enjoy this night together.
The festival is still jumping by the time we walk back into the center of the village. Dee and the boys are nowhere to be seen, and I don’t allow that to bother me for a second. I pull Titus back to the preel table and we each grab a glass of the steaming juice.
“To us!” I toast to him, a goofy smile on my face. A small smile pulls at his lips as he stares back into my eyes.
“To us,” he says back. We clank our cups together and take a sip. His whole demeanor is a little off putting. I would’ve thought that he would’ve had a post-sex glow like I did.
“Hey,” I grab his face. “What’s wrong? Is this still about you being an Unblessed?” He shakes his head. “Then what is it? I know that wasn’t your first time, just by how skilled you were, but that doesn’t bother me. So where’s your glow, huh?” I smirk at him, trying my hardest to lighten the moment. He takes a deep breath and opened his mouth, but before he could say whatever it was that he wanted to say, Zavid’s deep voice interrupts us.
“There you two go, we’ve been looking for you,” he says from behind me. I drop my hand from Titus’ face and turn around to see Zavid scowling with his muscled arms crossed over his grey v-neck. His brown eyes are narrowed with a look of suspicion. I lean back against Titus’ chest without much thought, and he instantly places his free hand on my hip. Zavid’s eyes narrow even more.
“We went for a walk,” I say with a smirk. “Are you bored? I’m sure there are plenty of eligible Relvarian women here who would love a dance. I mean,” I look around him. “I don’t see Caylen with you, so I guess you’re the only one that’s riding solo tonight.” I shrug, trying to pretend like Caylen being absent doesn’t tear me up inside. Why should it bother me? I just lost my virginity in the most mind blowing way. Could I possibly be so insatiable that I want Caylen too?
Yes. Yes, I am.
“Caylen and Dee are by the fire pit, where the food is being prepared. We’re about to bless the food and thank the Ancestors for a new start.” He eyes me as I take a sip of my preel. “This part of the festival is really sacred, but there’s nothing for you to do. Just stand there and sway. Lift your arms when she does, and say ‘Blessed be’ after she does. That’s it.”
“Ok, ok.” I nod my head as I take in everything he said. “Lift arms and sway, got it.”
He stares at Titus with a look of warning before turning and heading back to the fire pit. Maybe it was my imagination, but Zavid is acting a little stranger than usual. I finish off the rest of my drink, turn around and grab Titus by his collar.
“Dance with me before we have to go sway alongside a fire,” I whisper. The preel is coursing through my veins, heating me up as it goes. I wanted one last moment with him before we had to go perform a ritual that’s probably going to be weird as hell. He smirks at me before downing the rest of his drink, grabbing my hand, and dragging me to the almost empty dance floor.
The music is a lot slower at this time, and everyone who’s dancing is pretty much just holding each other and swaying. I wrap my arms around the back of his neck as he places his hands on my waist, and I get lost in his grey eyes all over again.
We don’t talk, because words aren’t needed. Once the song ends, he leans down and places the softest kiss on my lips, my nose and then my forehead.
“Come on,” he says. “Let’s go and partake in this ritual.” We walk behind the pavilion and stop to the back of the crowd. We’re a little late to the gathering, so there’s only space at the back. I spot Zavid and Caylen in the front, standing next to an elegant Dee. Her blonde hair is tied into a puff on the top of her head. Her brown skin glows in the firelight, while her blue eyes flicker with the flames.
Caylen’s head snaps up as soon as we take our place, and it looks like he’s about to come over to us before he changes his mind. I try to squelch the feeling of disappointment, but
it must have shown on my face because he drops his gaze back to the fire. Titus pulls me closer to his side, and I rest my head on his shoulder. Dee tilts her head up and smiles brilliantly at all that are gathered.
“Greetings, all! Tonight we celebrate the Blessings of Winter!” she calls out, her voice easily traveling to those of us in the back. “Many on this planet have forgotten what the Ancestors have done for us. And, ironically, the ones that have forgotten are the ones that are considered more Blessed than us!” Chuckles ring out as others call out in agreement. “But we won’t let their lack of faith stop us! We will give thanks to the Ancestors for cleansing our planet, for giving us a new start, and for showing us mercy even though many do not deserve it!” Her voice has taken on a lilt that draws Sheya to the surface. We both perk up as she takes a pouch out of the pockets of her dress.
“What do you think that is?” Sheya asks curiously.
“Probably some crushed chicken bones or something.”
“Whatever it is, she’s definitely calling up some serious forces.”
“What do you mean?” I ask.
“I’m sure most here thinks of this ritual as empty. Something that they’re expected to do. But they’re listening.”
“Who’s listening?”
“The Ancestors. Close your eyes and feel, Renee.” With that command, Sheya closes the door on our communication. I can still feel them there, so they didn’t “leave”, they just don’t want to continue talking. I close my eyes as instructed, feeling the power of Dee’s words wash over me.
“Okhokho, ngicela ulalele amazwi ethu!” Ok… so that wasn’t English. Warm lips press against my ear as Titus quietly translates for me.
“‘Ancestors, please hear our voices’.”
“Silahlekile ngaphandle kwesandla sakho sothando!”
“‘We are lost without your loving hand’.” Drums begin to beat behind me, causing the energy in the crowd to increase with each drum. Heat licks up the inside of my soul, and it’s the same feeling that I get every time my magic respond to an outside force.
“Isikhathi sesifikile sokuthi bonke ububi balungiswe!”
“‘The time has come for all evil to be settled’.” My energy escapes me as the wind picks up its pace. The pressure of Relvaria weighs down on me as its energy tries to meld with mine. People near me gasp as my energy draws them deeper into the spell that Dee is weaving.
“Ukhulume kimi emaphusheni ami!”
“‘You spoke to me in my dreams’.”
“Indodakazi yesiprofetho ilapha!” Gasps ring out at what she just said, and Titus stiffens from his place behind me. Caylen and Zavid’s eyes snap to me before going right back to the fire. I wait for Titus to translate what she just said, but he doesn’t. I turn to him with a questioning look as murmurs begin to seep from the crowd.
“What?” I hiss. “What did she just say?”
He gazes down at me with a tense look before staring at Dee as if he saw a ghost. “‘The daughter of the Prophecy is here’.”
Prophecy?
“Sizojabula!”
“‘We will rejoice’.”
“Sizobekezela!”
“‘We will be patient’.”
“Futhi sizolwa!”
“‘And we will fight’,” he whispers over the loud cheers of the crowd. This is not how Zavid said this would go. Not only is she no longer speaking English, but this seems more like a rally than a ritual of thanks.
“Blessed be!” she calls out in English. Thank fuck. Now I can join in and act like I know what’s going on.
“Blessed be!” I call out with everyone else. Dee grabs a handful of something from the pouch and fling it into the fire. A large plume of purple and pink flares from the fire and everyone gasps. Some even break out in tears.
“The Ancestors have heard our prayers! Rejoice! Tonight is the night for new beginnings!” The music picks back up to the high spirited tunes that they were playing earlier. People hug and twirl each other around. Cries of joy and jubilation ring out. I stand there, completely dumbfounded and at a loss of what’s going on. Titus grabs my hand and steers me out of the crowd. We follow a path until we’re in a moderately empty space.
I continue to stare at all of the villagers. The energy is a lot more vibrant after the ritual. It’s almost as if they were actually cleansed. What did Dee mean about “the daughter of the Prophecy is here”? And what did that mean to my guys? Titus’ reaction, along with Zavid and Caylen’s, made me feel as if they knew exactly what she was talking about.
“Talk,” I say to him as annoyance courses through my system. “What did she mean?”
He looks over my shoulder and I tense as I wait for the others to arrive. I was sorely disappointed when Dee walks over. “Isn’t it amazing?” she gushes. Her face is flushed, probably from the fire, and her eyes are sparkling in ways that I’ve never seen. “We will be free. The planet will thrive. We’ve waited so long for this!”
“Time for your acting skills to come through,” Sheya sarcastically says.
“It’s amazing,” I breathe out, capturing her hands and flashing the most genuine smile I can.
“Let’s dance!” she exclaims. She drags me to the dance floor and I’m hit with a little anxiety. I don’t think she’ll be able to overlook the fact that I don’t know the dance moves.
“I can’t really dance,” I call out.
“Me either!” she laughs as she spins me in a circle. We make up our own dance moves and it’s a little hard to see the Dee we met in the Dee that I’m dancing with. She’s carefree and there’s a little pep in her step that she didn’t have when we first came here.
We dance until we’re out of breath, we laugh until there’s tears in our eyes, and the entire time I can’t help but feel as if I’m an imposter. I have no idea what made her and the villagers so happy. I can’t feel the joy that she clearly thinks I do. I’m on the outside looking in.
When the music begins to shift over to a faster paced song, I tell Dee that I need to catch my breath or I’ll pass out from laughing too much. She smiles and shoves me off the dance floor before she turns and grabs a young man with emerald green eyes and an easy smile. He sweeps her into a dip and girlish laugh spills out of her.
I walk over to the boys, who hadn’t left their spot off to the side, because I need answers and I need them now. What made Dee turn into a carefree girl instead of a stern Elder? What caused the giant smiles and the loud laughter. What am I missing?
“Apparently everything,” Sheya says unhelpfully.
I nod my head in agreement, probably looking crazy to anyone watching me. The guys straighten up as I draw near, and I prepare myself for a showdown. Brown, grey, and blue eyes stare down at me, but I won’t let them pressure me into backing down. My heart hammers at the guarded look in Titus eyes, and I’m not too proud to admit that I’m a little hurt by his actions. After what we experienced together, I kind of thought that he’d be on my side on this. But I should’ve known that he’d stand beside his brothers. Duh. A few orgasm doesn’t buy allegiance.
“It bought yours,” Sheya says snidely.
“Shut up.”
“What’s going on? What aren’t you guys telling me?” I cross my arms and decide to focus my ire on Zavid. His look of disdain is much less harmful than the shuttered look from Caylen and Titus.
“It’s not that we were keeping it a secret. Many Relvarians do not believe in it, and it also wouldn’t make a difference for you one way or the other,” he responds.
“What wouldn’t?” I ask.
“There was the tale of The Prophecy. A dying Blessed saw it in their dreams that a Relvarian will come and kill the King. He has been poisoning the realm with his tyranny and his brutal punishments. He is also emitting enough toxic energy to now influence the realm. The Great Mountains of Drof have lost most of its water and food source. The Blessed are getting chosen less and less and living for shorter periods of time, no matter how strong they are.”
He looks over my head at the dancing villagers, his jaw clenching and unclenching before he brings his troubled gaze back to me.
“They are so happy because the Daughter of the Prophecy was fabled. But if an Unblessed Elder had the vision that she is here, then she must already be in Kor,” he finishes.
“Well, if she’s in Kor, then we’ll be able to meet her! Why aren’t you guys as excited as everyone else?” I ask, confused by their stoic faces.
“Because we do not believe in the Prophecy. It’s almost too good to be true. We’ll be happy when we see it,” he says.
“I think there’s nothing wrong with having a little hope. What’s life without hope?”
“Dark,” Caylen answers me.
I nod my head. “So, let’s say we enjoy the rest of this festival while we have the chance?”
“Let’s go,” Caylen says, grabbing my hand and leading me back to the dance floor.
We dance the night away and I put the ominous feeling in my gut to the back of my mind.
26
Renee
I hug Dee as we stand at the beginning of the path that leads out of the village. I never would’ve thought that I’d miss her after her initial welcome, but I know now that I definitely will. “Keep on this path and you will eventually make it to Kor. There is one other village along this path, but they are not a welcoming bunch. You would be advised to go around it.”
“Thank you for everything, Dee. And thanks for my winter gear,” I say to her, twirling around in my serape. She told me that I could have it last night after she showed me where the baths were. They have communal bathing houses, but it wasn’t awkward in the least. The boys and I were able to clean up, but I was the only one with a change of clothes. Now I only have on a pair of jeans, a black t-shirt, and my serape. All of my hoodies are shoved in my backpack.
“You’re welcome, that berrot looks so much better on you than it does on me.” Ah, ok. So they call it a berrot and not a serape. Duly noted. I want to say it back to her, but I’m afraid that I won’t roll the r’s like she does.
The Inner Self: The Prophecy Page 19