by Terri Lee
In an exchange of daughters across the ocean, Tess was sent to America and Caterina returned home.
Natalie's somber mood was juxtaposed with Nico's enthusiasm to have his baby girl back where she belonged. Even if only for a couple of weeks. Nico talked endlessly about having Natalie meet the kids and though she was eager she had a bit of apprehension. She and Nico had been living in their own little world for a while, now they were about to open the door and invite others in. It was bound to change the dynamics of their situation, for better or worse.
Like Christmas all over the world, the day was for families. In Italy, friends and relatives gathered for a large lunch that could last all day. Though Nico tried his best to cajole Natalie into joining his family festivities, she declined. An outsider's instinct told her Christmas Day was not the day to meet the kids for the first time. She would spend the day quietly with Nora and call Tess just to hear her voice.
Nico planned the meet and greet for a couple of days later. Natalie fretted over what to wear to the audition, tossing rejects on the bed in exasperation. She settled on a pair of black pants and a royal blue silk blouse and hoped she made a good first impression.
Nico came to the door with a big smile and an oven mitt on one hand. “Here she is.” He kissed her on the cheek and ushered her into the room. Music was playing softly in the background and something smelled delicious.
The kitchen was small by American standards. Natalie could never understand how the typical Italian feasts could be produced in such tiny quarters. But the dining area was large enough for a big table and plenty of chairs crowded around it.
She felt suddenly shy as Nico stood with his arm around her introducing her to his children. Claudia's children. Marius was his father's son, the same eyes and thick lashes, the same smile as he extended his hand then pulled her in for a kiss on both cheeks.
“It's so nice to meet you.” His accent was thicker than Nico's, but the twenty-year old was every inch his father's son. “Papa has told us all about you. May I call you Natalie?”
“Certainly. May I call you Marius?”
Everyone laughed at her little joke, eager to break the ice and settle in. Caterina hung back, and Natalie wasn't sure if it was bashfulness or something else at play, but when she extended her hand the girl's smile was perfect. She was all straight white teeth and a waterfall of hair, with a smile that didn't reach her eyes. Unlike Marius, she didn't lean in for a kiss, but her greeting was perfectly polite. If not well rehearsed.
“It's so nice to finally meet you.”
Natalie felt the temperature drop, but Nico seemed oblivious. Natalie decided to shake it off, hoping Caterina was just nervous.
“Can I help with dinner?” Natalie asked, looking for an exit.
“Sure, come with me.” Nico took her hand and led her into the kitchen.
“What on earth smells so good. It smells...familiar.”
“Good, I'm glad it smells familiar. It's meatloaf.”
“Meatloaf?” Natalie laughed. “My Italian boyfriend is fixing me meatloaf?” The word boyfriend hung in the air next to a question mark.
Nico grinned as he bopped her on the nose with his oven mitt. “You're forgetting I'm half American. And I can make one hell of an apple pie, too.”
“Look at you, Renaissance man.”
“You know my only mission is to impress you.”
Natalie filled the water glasses, but leery of appearing too comfortable in Caterina’s home she refrained from anything else and sat at the table like the guest she was.
“This is fabulous.” Natalie looked over at Nico, eyes wide and a mouth full of good old-fashioned American meatloaf.
Nico winked and reached over for a quick squeeze of her hand but not before Natalie caught the disapproval that swept across Caterina’s face. As the conversation turned to other things, the meatloaf was hardening in the pit of Natalie's stomach.
“Papa told us that you’re trying to lay low while over here and that we’re not to talk to anyone about you, and I just want to assure you that you can count on me,” Marius said.
Natalie turned to the ally at the other end of the table, as Marius flashed a big open grin her way. A younger version of that first smile Nico had sent to her across Piazza Farnese. Marius was curved toward Natalie and she responded in kind to her welcoming committee of one.
“Thank you, Marius. I appreciate that. I just want to live a normal life for a while, away from the cameras and the headlines. It's a whole new world for me.”
“I get it,” the young man nodded.
“When are you going back to Hollywood?” Caterina looked across the table coolly, innocence dripping off her fork.
Stunned, Natalie fumbled for a reply as she stared into the brown eyes of a nemesis she never saw coming. “I... I don't have any plans.”
“Oh.” Caterina lowered her eyes to her plate, her message delivered on top of the roasted potatoes.
Marius interrupted, curious to hear behind-the-scenes Hollywood stories. Did she know this person or that person? Eyes widened with each revelation. It was clear he was slightly star-struck but Natalie thought it was cute and gladly let him commandeer the conversation. She could answer without much thought while she tried to decode the information coming from the eighteen-year-old sitting across from her.
Caterina was circling the wagons around her father. Her message that there was no room inside that circle for Natalie was palpable. They were unmatched adversaries and Natalie stood without weapons as the dark-haired girl, stripped of a mother, dug her nails into all she had left.
34 Cat and Mouse
“I felt like I was the one being served up on a platter between the meat and potatoes,” Natalie said.
“That sounds like an uncomfortable place to be.” Anne grimaced.
“I was tip-toeing around land-mines in high-heels. Thankfully Marius was every bit as charming as his father, which gave me a little hope. It hurts me to say my first impression of Caterina was that she's just—spoiled. But considering the circumstances of her childhood I'm sure Nico felt he had to overcompensate. I'm guilty of the same thing with Tess. I feel sorry for her, or at least I want to.” Natalie wasn't sure if she was trying to convince Anne or herself.
Anne's expression gave nothing away. “And how did Nico react?”
“He didn't seem to notice.”
“What did he say when you brought it up later?”
“I didn't bring it up.”
Natalie pulled at the fringe on a pillow. A new pillow on a new couch in Anne's office across town. No tall window looking out over the convent garden to distract Natalie. No wall of books, just a cream-colored sofa and chair and lots of pillows in shades of blue. Anne and her husband lived upstairs, providing the perfect commute to work for Anne, but Natalie missed Santa Brigida's library that had witnessed her transformation.
“Why do you think you haven't brought it up?” Anne nudged.
Natalie sighed, dropping her shoulders along with all hopes of a defense. “Because he didn't bring it up.”
“So, you're waiting for him. What if he doesn't say anything?”
Natalie shrugged.
“And how does this fit into your new narrative of not sweeping things under the rug?”
“Busted.” Natalie groaned. “I know you're right. When Nico and I are together I'm filled with confidence. Then I see it from the outside looking in and it just feels so fragile.”
“What does?”
“All of it. Nico and I together. Nico and I separately. Can two broken halves come together and make a whole?”
“What does whole look like for you?”
“God, I don't even have a clue.” Natalie dropped both hands onto the pillow in her lap. “Am I just playing with someone else's life? Maybe that's what Caterina fears. And if it is, then I can't blame her for reacting the way she did.”
“Before you get too far into analyzing Caterina's motives, why don't you start by talking
to Nico about the dinner? Tell him how you felt. Let him hear you.”
“I will,” Natalie resolved. “I'm not going to start off this relationship by hiding the truth. If I can't talk to him then we're not who I thought we were.”
“Good for you.”
“You think Caterina doesn't like you?” Nico asked, a confused look in his eyes. “Oh, mia cara, I'm sure that's not true.”
“I'm not sure it's that she doesn't like me, it just really felt like she had her guard up.” Natalie was struggling to find the right words and not step on any toes. Careful to avoid words like cold or rude, she went fishing for a clue.
“Did she say anything to you after the dinner?”
“No. She seemed perfectly happy.”
Happy I was gone.
“Maybe I'm overreacting. I just want them to like me.”
“Well Marius is in love, so the two of us may be headed for a Shakespearean battle, if that makes you feel any better. “
“It does,” Natalie cooed. “He's adorable.”
“Caterina is more like her mother. She takes time to warm up. Give her a little bit more room and I'm sure she'll see everything that I see.” Nico seemed so confident; it was easy to let herself be persuaded. Tess had seemed unimpressed with Nico during their first dinner, but she still made polite small talk and eventually Nico charmed her out of her shell. Maybe it was wrong of Natalie to expect two adult children to welcome her with open arms.
Nico's assurances fell flat when the next gathering had Natalie doubting Caterina's intentions. This time they'd made plans to go out to dinner. Natalie had put on her best smile and walked up to the little group with a mother's heart wide open, ready to embrace the eighteen-year-old in a fresh start. But her heart sank as she watched the dark-haired beauty plead with her daddy to take her to Armando's, saying she'd been craving it for months and since she'd only be home for a few more days, wouldn't he please...please...
Armando’s was the 'IT' spot of the year. The place to see and be seen. Crawling with notables from every avenue of fame, it was the last place in Rome Natalie would set foot in.
“You guys go on, I'll head home and catch you later,” Natalie said to the trio.
She was positive she saw the girl's lips curve into a feline smirk of victory, as Caterina said, “Are you sure, Natalie? We really wanted you to come with us.” Meow.
Her arm clinging to Nico's, big brown eyes looking over at Natalie, Caterina looked like a ten-year old, but she was playing a big girl's game.
“Come on, sorella, let's pick something else.” Marius frowned at his little sister. “The plan was for all of us to go out to dinner.”
Caterina looked even prettier when she pouted, and Natalie could see Nico melting at the sight of a quivering bottom lip.
“No.” Natalie shooed them away. “Go to Armando's. I know what it's like when you're craving something. We'll go out another time.”
Caterina's amateur acting skills may have convinced her father, but not a pro like Natalie. Natalie would rather go home than endure another cat and mouse game around the dinner table with this girl.
Nico whispered in her ear as he kissed her good-bye. “I'm sorry. I'll make it up to you.” Arms wrapped tightly around one another the little family walked away, leaving Natalie to wonder if there would ever be room for her in there. Before they turned the corner, Caterina turned back and waved to Natalie with a disarming grin.
Natalie waggled her fingers and pulled a fake smile from her inventory to match her opponent's, then headed for home, thoroughly confused.
35 New Year
Nineteen-seventy-eight swept in full of promise. With Caterina on her way to the States and Tess on her way back to Natalie's arms, a sense of peace enveloped Natalie's world and the worry that had settled in since Natalie watched her daughter board the plane to America, disappeared like morning fog in the sunshine.
But before Tess returned, Natalie and Nico wrapped themselves around one another for the two days they had to themselves and she let him quiet her fears about Caterina. He took them all, listened attentively, assured her everything would work out fine in the end, then laid them at the foot of the bed.
Now, Natalie kissed the last drop of New Year's champagne from Nico's lips as they set their glasses beside the bed. She had never craved sex before. Not like she did now with Nico. She couldn't get enough of him. Couldn't get enough of his skin, his lips, his tongue. The smell of him drove her wild. She wanted to breathe him in. To be filled with his very essence.
“I want to swallow you whole,” she whispered,
“We can arrange that.” Nico laughed as he pulled her out from the tangle of sheets.
Draping her arms around his neck she felt herself sinking into a hazel pool. She made no attempt to swim to the surface. Drowning was the preferable option. The pool she'd fallen into, became an ocean, deep enough to swallow them both. Spinning and swirling they sank deeper, and as she looked for the ocean floor beneath her, she saw there was no end in sight.
Nico was right, she told herself the next day, everything would work out in the end.
It had to.
In the meantime, she had Monty's visit to look forward to. Phone calls and letters could never replace what they had face to face. He'd be here in three days and she was looking forward to a week-long slumber party. With wine.
She and Monty were stretched out on the couch, her feet in his lap, wine glasses in hand.
“You're in need of a pedicure.” Monty inspected her big toe.
“I haven't had time.”
“Of course not, you're too busy with your Roman god. I hope he doesn't mind ragged cuticles.”
“He doesn't.” Natalie laughed. “He loves everything about me.”
Monty studied her over his wine glass before answering. “If I'm not mistaken you have the distinct look of someone who's been thoroughly and soundly fucked. Looks good on you.”
Natalie spit wine down the front of her shirt as she swung her legs off Monty's lap.
“Good God Monty, I think you sit up in the middle of the night and dream up things to shock me.”
“Did I shock you?”
“Not in the least.” Natalie recovered her composure. “I expect nothing less from you.”
“Damn, I'll have to work on my act.”
It was well past midnight on Monty's first night, everyone else had drifted off to bed after consuming all the food and laughter they could stand. It was just the two of them. Like old times.
Monty's love wrapped around her like an old sweater, all soft and stretched out in just the right places. Their vaudeville routine of corny jokes and one-liners was well-worn, honed to perfection over the years, accompanied by their own laugh tract. Finishing one another's sentences, they talked until they were hoarse. They were yin and yang. Lucy and Ethel. Natalie and Monty.
“All kidding aside, you really look fabulous, baby,” Monty said. “You look like you again.”
Natalie took in the compliment with a deep breath. “It took a while to find me.”
“You know what they say, anything worth having is worth waiting for.”
Natalie clinked glasses with Monty. “Cin cin, my old friend.”
“And chin-chin-cheroo to you.” Monty lifted his glass in a solemn toast while Natalie snorted. Everything was funnier after midnight. Especially after several glasses of wine.
“Aren't you tired, Mont?”
“Hell no, I don't even know what time it is. I'm still on LA time.”
“You'll crash once you hit the bed,” Natalie said.
“I'll sleep when I'm dead. I want to hear everything you couldn't say in a letter. Speak.”
Natalie got up to pour herself another glass of wine. After topping off Monty's glass as well, she swiped one of Maria's famous bruchetta's from the colorful platter in the center of the coffee table, before settling back into the sofa cushions.
“Well...what can I say that I haven't already told yo
u?”
“You can say it all again because it's different face to face.”
God, she loved this ginger-haired man, with a dimple so deep she could put her finger in it.
“I love Nico.” A warm flush ran from her cheeks down her neck. “Isn't it funny how falling in love makes you feel like a teenager, no matter how old you are?”
“I know what you mean, I've been a teenager a dozen times in the past year. I just fell in love again this morning, with the driver who picked me up at the airport.”
“How'd that work out for you?”
“Well I'm sitting here on the couch with you and your ragged cuticles...so there's your answer.”
“Poor boy, better luck next time,” Natalie soothed. “Now back to me and Nico. I love him,” she said again. “He's the most genuine person I've ever met. He's so open to life, even after all he's been through. It's like he has his arms around everything.”
Monty was nodding. “What a beautiful way to describe someone. He sounds fabulous. Almost too good to be true.”
“No, he's real.” Natalie shook her head. “Wait 'til you meet him.”
“I can't wait. Tomorrow night, right?”
“Yep. I don't know why I feel nervous.”
“I'm the one who's nervous.” Monty's eyes were wide. “I'm all set to hate him anyway.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I'm talking about some gorgeous Italian swooping in to steal my best girl; how do you think I should feel?”
Natalie smiled. “I haven't been stolen, Monty. Or held captive against my will.”
“I've convinced myself you're suffering from Stockholm Syndrome.”
“The only syndrome I'm suffering from is love.”
Monty raised his hands in defeat. “Alright, you win. How does Tess like him?”