“You are young, and I’m—”
“Experienced.” I cut him off before he said he was old again. I tried to make my voice sound sultry as I added, “I have lots to learn, Mr. Alexander.”
Again, his eyes flared hot but this time with desire. “You’re going to make me into a cliché. The older boss teaching his nubile assistant.”
“I can see that idea turns you on,” I nodded toward his groin where I could see the outline of his dick.
He laughed. “I am a fucking cliché.”
I knelt between his knees and ran my hand over his cock, feeling it harden and thicken behind his zipper. “Me too. I want to learn what makes you happy, Blake. The first time I saw your dick, I wanted to suck it. I even had a dream about it.”
“I’ve dreamed about that too.”
I looked up into his dark eyes with surprise. “You have?”
“I told you, I can’t stop wanting you. Or thinking of you. Or having wet dreams about you.” There was an edge of exasperation to his tone that made me feel like I should apologize for that.
Instead, I squeezed his dick. “Can I suck it? Will you show me how?”
For a minute I thought he’d refuse me. Then he undid his pants and pushed them along with his boxers, down, then sat back in his chair.
“Take off your dress again,” he said kicking his pants aside.
“Why? This is about you.”
“One, because your tits turn me on and two, it’s messy when a man comes.”
I remembered all the cum I had to wipe from my pussy the first time. “Aren’t you supposed to come in my mouth?”
He groaned. “Only if you want me to. If not, it’ll land on me or you. Maybe your tits.” His eyes flashed with excitement at that last bit making me think he’d like coming on my tits.
I stared at his dick, long, hard, and sticking straight up.
I wrapped my hand around it, marveling at how hard it was while covered with soft skin. “This is fascinating.”
He gave off a sound that sounded like a mix between a snort and a grunt.
“Do I just… put my mouth on it.”
“What do you want to do?” He put his hand over mine and slowly stroked. I could feel the ridges beneath the skin as my hand slid over him.
“I want to suck it.”
“Then suck it.” His voice was hoarse. “Like a popsicle.”
I leaned forward, pressing my lips to the velvety tip and then slid it into my mouth.
“Mmmm… yes.” His fingers threaded through my hair.
Deciding I was on the right track, I took him deeper.
“That’s right. Now fuck it with your mouth.”
I lifted my head to release him and then lowered down over him, slowly bobbing over his dick.
“Yes, that’s good… so good, Bella.”
I lifted my gaze, wanting to see his face as I blew him. His eyes were closed, he had a slight smile as I sucked him in my mouth.
I tightened my lips, wanting to increase the friction.
“Fuck… yes…” His hips rose slightly meeting my mouth.
I continued moving my mouth over him, with each stroke his breath grew quicker and harsher.
“Bella.” He took my hand, wrapping it around his dick again, allowing me to only focus on the head of it. “Faster.” He squeezed my hand, so I tightened my grip. I used my hand to jack him off while my mouth slid up and down over his tip.
“Yes… I’m so close…”
My free hand was on his thigh. I thought I might use two hands to stroke him, but as I moved my hand closer, I touched his balls. He let out a long hiss, which told me he liked that too. I cupped his balls, gently massaging them.
“Yes… Fuck… I’m going to come… don’t stop, don’t stop…”
It was unusual to hear the always in control Blake at the mercy of my touch. It made me feel powerful and feminine.
He let out another long growl. “I’m coming…”
I had the idea that drinking a man’s cum was a big turn on for them, but my curiosity about what it looked like when a man ejaculated got the better of me. I released him from my mouth and used one hand to jack his dick while the other continued to massage his balls.
His gaze caught mine and in them, I saw a wild desire. He pushed my hand tilting his cock toward me. “I’m coming Bella… Fuck I’m going to come on your tits.” He’d barely had the words out when I stroked down on him and the first bit of cum shot out, landing on my chest.
“Don’t stop Bella…” He wrapped his hand around mine again, moving my hand at the speed he wanted, forcing another shot of cum which landed on my nipple, then another on my cleavage. It seemed to keep on coming until finally, he released my hand. I stopped stroking him, but I held his cock as it slowly softened and returned to its normal state.
I looked down, and using my other hand, ran my fingers through the warm, milky liquid. I brought it to my lips to taste it.
“It’s salty.” I looked up at him. “You’re not disappointed that I didn’t let you come in my mouth, are you?”
His eyes were soft. “No. Not everyone likes it.”
“I might like it. I just wanted to see what it looked when you came.”
“I feel a bit like a science experiment.” He reached over to his desk and pulled tissues from the box and handed them to me.
“I thought you were the teacher. Tell me, Blake, did I pass?”
He let out a loud laugh, his eyes twinkled with humor and at that moment, he was the most handsome man I’d ever met. “You tell me. You’ve got my cum all over your tits.”
I smiled as I wiped his cum from me. “You came, but did you enjoy it? Even I know, not all orgasms are alike.”
He studied me for a moment. “How do you know that?”
“I know that with you they’re better than when I’m alone.” I wasn’t sure I should confess to masturbating, but crouching at his knees with his dick in his lap and his cum on me, it didn’t seem as embarrassing as it would have normally been.
“You’re right. It’s usually better between two people.”
“Usually, but not always?”
He stood and held a hand out to help me up. “It’s been wonderful with you, Bella if that’s what you’re asking.”
I nodded a little embarrassed by my need for reassurance.
“I haven’t come like that in years.” He pushed my hair out of my face. “Until you, I haven’t even wanted to.” He studied me as if I was a puzzle he couldn’t figure out.
“I feel like I should take you to dinner, but I need to get home to Lily.”
“Yes, of course.” I found my dress and put myself back together while he did the same.
He walked with me as we took the elevator down and headed out onto the street. “Can I drive you home?”
I shook my head. “I’ll get a car.”
He started to take out money but then stopped. “Would it be offensive if I pay for your ride?”
What a pair we were. I needed sex lessons and he’d been out of the dating game so long he didn’t know what to do. “It’s okay. I can take care of it.”
“Listen,” he said before he reached his car. “If at any time, you want this to end, you just tell me okay? I don’t want to hurt you or make you uncomfortable.”
I appreciated his concern. “I will.”
He looked at me like he wanted to give me a kiss goodnight, but now we were on the street with his driver waiting for him.
“Goodnight, Mr. Alexander.”
“Goodnight, Ms. Hanson.”
12
Blake
Joanna used to tease me about my iron will. I wondered what she’d think about my inability to resist Bella. My will was useless around her. I shook my head. Now wasn’t the time to be thinking about Joanna, but I couldn’t stop the guilt that I was betraying our love. I’d promised to love her and only her for forever. Yes, it was ‘til death do us part, but I wasn’t dead. Only she was gone. And m
y love was still there even after her death. The guilt alone should have been enough to deter my craving for Bella. But it wasn’t. Not only did the guilt not sway my need to indulge in her, but each time I was with her, the craving grew. She was young yes, but sweet and so responsive. She was eager to discover the pleasure two bodies could find together. And watching her pink lips around my dick nearly made my brain explode. Just thinking about it now made my cock start to swell.
I didn’t want this, but heaven help me, I couldn’t stop it. As much as I was pleased she was willing to accept my terms, I felt guilty about it too. It was insulting and unfair to her. Why she agreed instead of slapping me again, I didn’t know.
I arrived home too late to eat with Lily but early enough that she was still up.
“Daddy! Look what I made.” She held up a piece of paper she’d been drawing on at her little art station in the living room.
“What is it?” I looked at the crooked lines crisscrossing the page.
“A sped-sheet of my toys.”
“She’s going to be a tycoon when she grows up,” Mrs. Douglas said. “She’s enthralled by the spreadsheet.”
Another influence of Bella.
I spent the evening with Lily and her spreadsheet, then read her a story and put her to bed.
“Daddy, when can I come to your work again?”
“I don’t know, Lilybug.” I put the book I finished on her side table.
“I want to see Bella and be your assistant.”
What was it about Bella that she bewitched both me and my daughter?
“Maybe sometime you can come for a little visit.” I couldn’t ask Bella to entertain Lily again, but I hated saying no to my girl.
“Her mommy is gone too. And her daddy. He’s not in heaven though.”
I was reminded again that Bella was alone. It somehow made her sweet and kind demeanor even more extraordinary. And me using her for my own sexual release even more despicable.
“That’s sad.”
“Maybe you can be her daddy too.”
I choked. Christ. The truth was, I was nearly old enough to be her father. Plenty of people had kids at seventeen, which is how old I was when Bella was born.
“Can she come to my birthday party?”
I sighed. I loved Lily but sometimes her conversations were difficult for me to navigate. There was so much I didn’t know about the world that she was curious about. And of course, in this case, how could I explain to my little girl she couldn’t invite Bella to her party.
“Bella has her own life, sweetie. She’s probably busy.”
“You can ask her.” Lily looked up at me with her gray eyes. It was the look that tugged directly on my heart.
“We’ll see. Right now you need to go to sleep.” I pulled her covers higher on her. “Goodnight Lilybug.”
“G’nite daddy.”
Once out in the living room, I poured a drink and took a moment to regroup. I didn’t like denying Lily but I couldn’t invite Bella to her party, even if the thought of it was nice. What would people think? What would Patsy and Jim think? They’d have to guess there was something between me and Bella, and that would hurt them, I was sure of it. They still reeled over Joanna’s loss as I did.
At the same time, Lily’s reminder that Bella was alone in the world made me want to invite her. What did she do when she wasn’t at work? Did she have friends? She didn’t have a boyfriend. It didn’t sound like she went out. If she did, she’d have certainly met another man. There was something wrong about a beautiful, vibrant woman like Bella going through life alone. She had so much to give. It made my proposition to her even worse. By agreeing to it, she was putting off finding her own life. A man to love her. Friends to spend time with. Hobbies to enjoy. I should put an end to this, and yet the very thought of it made my chest hurt.
Was it possible to be addicted to a person? How was it possible this woman could make me want her so intensely that it overwhelmed my reason and my will?
My phone interrupted my ruminations. The caller ID showed it was Patsy.
“Patsy. How are you?”
“Good Blake. I was calling about Lily’s birthday. We thought we’d come stay in the city. Make a weekend of it.”
“Lily would love that.”
“Did she tell you she wanted to invite your assistant?”
I frowned. When had Patsy talked to Lily? “Yes. I told her Bella probably has something else going on.”
“She seemed fond of Lily. You don’t think she’d come?”
I looked at my phone wondering what was going on. “She’s my assistant. It’s not in her job description to attend my personal functions.” It wasn’t in her job description to give me a blow job either. I scraped my hand over my face wondering why I was losing control of myself.
“I know, but she was so sweet with Lily and Lily doesn’t stop talking about her.”
“When did you speak with Lily?”
“I called over to your place after school to ask her about her birthday. We need to compare our lists, Blake, so we don’t get her the same thing.”
I blew out a breath. “Yes, of course.”
There was silence for a moment. “I know it’s a strange request to invite your assistant, but Lily is so taken with her and… I just want to give that little girl everything she wants. She’s lost so much already.”
I realized that my main feeling in life now was guilt. Patsy’s words added on to the pile of it I already had over Joanna and Bella. Now there was guilt over my child suffering the loss of her mother while I did little to compensate for it. But what could I do? There was no replacing Joanna.
“I’ll ask, but I’m not going to force her.” I seriously considered not asking her but saying I had. I could tell them that Bella couldn’t come. I didn’t enjoy lying, but I wasn’t comfortable bringing my mistress… shit, I really was a cliché… to my daughter’s sixth birthday party.
“No, of course not. Oh, Lily will be so excited.” There was another pause. “How are you Blake?”.
I knew she meant emotionally, like how my soul was doing. She often did it, I supposed, to serve as a surrogate mother. As much as I appreciated having her around, I wasn’t comfortable telling her my innermost thoughts. Imagine me talking to her about my inability to resist fucking my assistant. The same assistant she wanted to come to Lily’s party.
I answered the question as if it was a general question, like how’s the weather. “I’m okay. How are you and Jim?”
“We’re good, but we worry about you.”
“I’m fine, Patsy, really.”
“We just want you to be happy. Joanna would want that.”
“Joanna was my happiness.” I dug the heel of my palm into an eye socket.
“I know. She was ours too. But we have to live, Blake. Show Lily the vibrancy of life.”
I wasn’t sure what she wanted me to do. I gave Lily all I could give, didn’t I?
“We were thinking of maybe taking a family trip to Disney World this summer. Lily and you, and Jim and me. What do you think?”
It sounded like a nightmare. It was hotter and more humid in Florida during the summer than it was here. It was also crowded.
“How about spring break or the fall instead?”
“Well, okay. The idea is that we all take time together for fun as a family.”
“Lily would love that.” I downed my drink and contemplated getting another.
“What about you Blake? What would you love, besides having Joanna back?”
A new wave of guilt hit me because my first thought about what I’d love wasn’t Joanna or even Lily. It was time with Bella.
“I’d love for Lily to be happy.”
Patsy’s sigh sounded disappointed. “Your happiness counts too, Blake.”
“I appreciate that. I promise I’m good.” When did I become such a good liar?
After the phone call, I showered, again feeling I couldn’t get into my marriage bed with Bella on m
e. The rational part of me knew I was being ridiculous, but I had to do whatever I could to ease my irrational mind. And because I did, I questioned my actions again. I shouldn’t be touching Bella if my conscience would give me a thrashing every time. How could I touch another woman when I still loved my wife? I was risking problems at the company and putting Bella in a precarious position. Even with all that, I understood now, there was something about Bella that drew me to her. When I was with her, she smoothed the raw edges of my life. Like somehow, my broken pieces weren’t so scattered. She fulfilled some missing piece. She was like an Oasis in the middle of a desert. A man had to drink, right?
But I was an asshole using her to fulfill my own needs. What did she need? Was I providing her something besides lessons in sex? Was there something I could give her besides an orgasm? Me not knowing much about Bella beyond her being alone in the world made me feel like a dick. Big surprise. What in my life wasn’t making me feel guilty or like a jerk? Even so, I knew I needed to find a way to give Bella something in return for what she was giving me.
13
Bella
The next day, I wondered if what had happened with Blake the day before was real, or just a dream. As usual, he was holed up in his office when I got to work, and I didn’t see him for most of the day. Had I dreamed that he fucked me on his desk and let me give him a blow job? Because he was acting exactly the same as before.
Then again, maybe that was the point. No one was supposed to know about our little affair. We needed to act like we always did so no one would suspect us.
Since I agreed to monogamy in our affair, I worked at creating some distance with Dylan. I kept working and acting distracted instead of bantering with him. Eventually, he caught on.
“Is something wrong, Bella?” He sat in the chair in front of my desk with his ankle crossed over his knee.
I was behind my desk, glad that he hadn’t perched himself on the corner. “Not wrong. No.”
“What then? I thought we had a good vibe going on here.”
Beautiful Mistakes: Contemporary Romance Boxset Books 1-4 Page 48