by Sarah Piper
I’d just saved Gray’s life.
And I’d just remembered the absolute most precious piece of my own.
I took her face between my palms and tilted it toward me, capturing her beautiful blue gaze.
Then, as if I’d just figured out the answer to a complex question that had been plaguing me for years, I said, “Don’t take this the wrong way, but I’m fairly certain I’m in love with you.”
Thirty-Two
GRAY
“He remembered something, Hay.” I measured out two more cups of dried lavender and another cup of amaranth flower into a glass bowl for Verona, who was busy in the common room sewing protective mojo bags. “Not just something, but a major thing.”
Haley held up a finger to silence me, then continued counting the crystals spread out on the counter before her, piles of smoky quartz and black tourmaline that would also be sewn into the bags. Since the vamp attack three days ago, Verona and some of the other witches blessed with protective magical skills had been working nonstop, shoring up our defenses around the house as well as around our bodies.
No one had been seriously injured that night but me, and Darius had healed me on the spot. After Ronan had killed the vamp who’d knifed me, he, Darius, Emilio, and Detective Lansky scoured the forest, identifying and then burning all the vamp bodies and ensuring none had escaped alive.
Darius had been right—they were out-of-towners, a group from the Carolinas that he suspected had connections to the three that attacked us in the morgue the night we’d gone looking for intel on Sophie’s murder. We couldn’t be certain, but the detectives thought there might be some kind of supernatural bounty on my rebels and me. Lower-level vamps were fickle with their loyalties, and after the slaughter at Norah’s house, it wouldn’t have taken much for them to get the word out that Darius Beaumont was “a traitor” to his own kind.
With so many enemies breathing down our necks—known and unknown—Verona didn’t want us taking any chances. “An unprotected witch is a sad story just begging to be written,” she’d said.
Other than a freak hailstorm the following morning, our last couple of days had been fairly low-key, and we’d spent them working on magic and spellcraft with Verona, inventorying our weapons and magical ingredients, and helping Reva practice her shadowmancy. After the attack, none of us wanted to let her out of our sights. Liam had been especially helpful in that department, spending long hours instructing her on the nature of physics, space-time, and astral travel. I didn’t understand most of what they talked about, but he made her laugh and kept her out of trouble, and with his patient tutoring, she seemed to be gaining both confidence and skill.
“That’s good, though, isn’t it?” Haley finally looked up from her task, her crystals all counted out into neat rows. “That means he’s getting his memories back.”
“What else could it mean?”
Darius hadn’t remembered much—just snatches of the time we’d spent together in that cabin, the way he’d felt about me in those moments, and a little bit about the vamp attacks at the morgue and at Norah’s place. Nothing more, and nothing since, but it was the first real glimmer of hope any of us had gotten that he might actually regain his memories.
“I don’t know much about how memory works,” Haley said. “I’m the blood girl, remember?”
I gave her my best, your-my-favorite-sister smile. “Speaking of being the blood girl…”
“Gray.” She lanced me with an admonishing gaze. “I thought Deirdre was totally against the blood spell idea.”
“Deirdre isn’t here.”
Haley and I still had so many questions for our grandmother, but since her first visit to Raven’s Cape, she’d flitted in and out of our lives so often, she might as well be an apparition. Since the ice bomb and our subsequent relocation, she’d gotten slightly better at checking in by phone. But even then, whenever I tried to question her about the legacy or our mother or anything else having to do with the past, she suddenly had a hundred reasons to get off the phone.
Since I’d told Haley about our sisterhood and our bloodline, she hadn’t even gotten time alone with Deirdre yet.
But our family dynamics, crazy as they were, would have to wait.
“She’s just worried it will summon our ancestors,” I said.
“Which will set in motion your end of the deal with Sebastian, imprison the ghosts of our relatives, and probably get you shipped off to hell where you’ll spend the rest of eternity worshipping a glorified pimp who calls himself a prince.”
“I appreciate your thorough and vivid imagination, Hay.” I sealed up the jars of lavender and amaranth and set them back on the shelf with the other non-lethal herbs. “But I don’t think it will work that way. Magic is all about intention. As long as we’re clear on our desired outcome, we should be fine.”
“Should be fine? You know that’s just a stand-in phrase for ‘I might blow everything to shit but I don’t care because reasons?’”
“Honestly? I don’t even think the ancestor thing is Deirdre’s main issue. She’s just… I don’t know. She thinks it’s a distraction.” I lowered my voice, crushing a bud of lavender between my thumb and forefinger. “She’s worried that I haven’t spent enough time with the other witches yet. She says if I’m going to lead them, I need to roll up my sleeves, get over my trust issues, and start participating as one of them.”
“She has a point.”
“I know, but she’s also missing one. A big one.”
“Which is?”
“We can do all the physical workouts Emilio and Elena come up with. We can learn sword fighting and martial arts. We can crush herbs and meditate and do group spells and swap secrets from everyone’s books of shadows every single day, and yes, all of those things are important—I’m not saying otherwise. But they pale in comparison to the most powerful tools we have: Ourselves. Our bonds. Our own unique magic. Our instincts.”
“Yes!” Haley pointed at me, a grin lighting up her face. “That’s the kind of poster-worthy shit you should be saying to the group, Silversbane.”
“Get me a bullhorn and some glitter cannons, and we’ll think about it.” I flicked the lavender bud at her, and she laughed again. “Anyway, I’m serious. Without his memories, Darius isn’t whole. He still has instincts, but he doesn’t remember his experience. All the things he’s learned and honed along the way. All the people he’s learned to trust—
“And learned to love,” she sing-songed, batting her lashes at me.
“And love, yes. Love and friendship are bonds that strengthen magic, Haley. Witches, vampires, shifters, demons, fae, humans… We’re all stronger for it.”
Haley ran her hand over the neat rows of her crystals, a soft sigh escaping her lips.
“You’re already saying yes,” I said. “I can feel it.”
She rolled her eyes, but then smiled, and I knew we were in business.
“Thank you, thank you, thank you!” I stepped around the counter and hugged her close, planting a big kiss on her cheek. “You really are my favorite sister. You know that, right?”
“I’m going to remember you said that when we meet the other two.” She squirmed out of my embrace and made a big show of wiping my kiss off her face. “If this goes sideways, you’re telling Grams.”
I nodded, keeping my thoughts to myself. Because if this thing went sideways, Grams would be the least of our worries. Sebastian, on the other hand…
“Okay,” Haley said. “Let me get this stuff to Verona. In the meantime, you put on the kettle and crush up some dried rosemary, forget-me-not, and vanilla bean.”
“For the spell?”
“Those herbs are associated with memories, so I’m going to have you and Darius drink an infusion before we start. Can’t hurt, right?”
“Good idea.”
“We’re also going to need black sea salt, water, six red candles, a sage bundle, and some matches. I’ll ask Verona for some crystals to help keep out negative sp
irit energy. That should create a magical barrier against any of our dead relatives, just in case any of them get curious.”
I was already rummaging through the pantry for the ingredients. “Is that everything?”
“Actually, we could use an assistant,” she said. “This spell is pretty intense. Once we get into the ritual, it might be helpful to have someone on the sidelines keeping an eye on things.”
“I would like to help, if you’ll have me.” Liam leaned against the doorway, hands in his pockets, his casual stance completely at odds with the hope and excitement in his eyes.
Since we’d moved into the lodge, I hadn’t spent much time with him, but his presence had been comforting. He’d been there when I’d brought Emilio back from the brink. He’d been there when I’d saved Asher’s soul from the devil’s trap in Norah’s attic. It seemed fitting that he’d be there when we brought Darius back.
Looking at him now, at the flannel shirt buttoned crookedly, the messy blond hair, those bright blue eyes that never seemed to dim, I felt a flicker of hope and excitement, too.
“Liam Colebrook,” I said with a grin, “you’re hired.”
Thirty-Three
GRAY
“How are you guys feeling?” Haley asked, checking her supplies one last time before finally shutting the door to the outside world. “Still good to go?”
Upstairs in the back corner bedroom I’d claimed as mine, Darius and I sat on the floor across from each other in the lotus position, gazing into each other’s eyes. A thick red candle burned between us, carved with runes, its golden light reflecting in his eyes. Beside us, sage smoke rose from a stone bowl, purifying our space.
It was just after sunset and the room was dim at the day’s end, yet for us, it felt like a beginning. A brand new day full of promise, potential, and possibility.
I was nearly giddy with it.
“Excellent,” I said, and Darius nodded. He hadn’t said much since we’d started, but I saw the hope in his eyes. He wanted this to work. Believed that it could.
“Liam,” Haley said, “go ahead and serve the infusion.”
Liam poured out two cups of liquid from a ceramic teapot on the dresser, passing one to each of us. The scents of rosemary and vanilla filled the room, wrapping me in a comforting embrace.
“As you’re sipping your tea,” Haley instructed, “I want you both to close your eyes, relax, and call up a particularly strong shared memory—one that comes to you easily, Darius.”
His full lips parted into a grin, and my insides fizzed. “The cabin,” he said. “Where—”
“TMI, vampire,” Haley teased. “We don’t need details. You guys just need to call it up for yourselves. In silence. Try to bring in as many sensory details as you can—sights, smells, sounds, tastes, feelings, intuitions, all of it. Once you’ve got that firmly in place, and your tea is finished, you can open your eyes again.”
We closed our eyes, and I let my mind wander back to the Shadowrealm, back to the snowy wood where we’d found our perfect hideaway. I heard the crackle of the fire he’d build, felt the warmth of the flames against my bare legs and the soft T-shirt Darius had dressed me in. The scent of the cabin’s bare wood interior mingled with the intoxicating whiskey-and-leather scent of my vampire, and my heart rate kicked up—both in the memory, and in the present moment. I drew in other details, too: the soft touch of his fingers on my skin as he’d traced circles across my forehead, calming me. The taste of his kiss, and the desperate need I felt for his touch. The warmth of his mouth between my thighs. The desire in his eyes when he’d finally claimed me, his words echoing in my memory… You absolutely intoxicate me…
My body was wound tightly, my breath coming in short bursts. I’d just finished the last of my tea, and I was certain I’d had a firm hold on the memory.
For me, those moments weren’t going anywhere.
I opened my eyes, and found my vampire with a hard-on.
He offered a devilish smile, but no apologies, and I couldn’t help but laugh.
“I see we were thinking about the same thing,” I said.
“I’ve been thinking about it every day since it came back to me, love. Dreaming about it, reliving it, replaying it. In fact, I’m considering commissioning Asher to make some sketches for me.”
“Great,” Haley said, and I flinched. I’d almost forgotten there were other people in the room. “Judging from the state of Darius’s pants and the crimson flush on Gray’s cheeks, I’m giving you both an A for that part of the assignment. Moving on.”
Verona had given us several large crystals to help keep our magic contained and protect us from any potential visitors from beyond, and now Haley placed them in the corners of the room and on the windowsill—black tourmaline, labradorite, black obsidian. Next, she set the six red candles in a circle around us, standing a Tarot card against each one. They were all cards I’d consciously selected earlier from the deck Emilio had given me, hoping to draw on their particular energies for the ritual:
Six of Cups, for nostalgia and good memories, and a childlike faith that our blood spell would work as intended.
Judgment, symbolizing the rebirth of Darius as a whole being, memories restored and intact.
Three of Cups, a card of friendship and sisterhood, for the deep bond and gratitude I felt toward Haley.
Queen of Swords, to aid Darius with mental clarity.
The Lovers, representing our eternal bond, blood and heart and—though it was an odd choice of words considering Darius was a vampire—soul.
And finally, The Star. I’d drawn it on the day Emilio and I had first been intimate together. The day Reva had turned up at the RCPD. It’d brought me a sense of calm and peace and hope, and I was channeling all those feelings again now, bringing them into the ritual that would bring my vampire back to me.
As Liam lit the surrounding candles, Haley knelt inside the circle next to me and Darius and unsheathed her athame, a slim silver dagger with a handle fashioned from raw quartz. She passed it through the sage smoke and whispered a few incantations in Latin, then used it to slice Darius’s fingertip.
“Place a single drop of blood on Gray’s tongue,” she said. “No more, no less.”
Darius did as she instructed, and I closed my eyes, letting the blood soak in like it had in the Shadowrealm. Again, I tasted the richness of it, smooth and slightly bitter, like dark chocolate without a grain of sugar.
A flood of images cascaded through my mind’s eye, I gasped.
“Tell me what you see,” Haley said.
“I can see Darius!” I said. “You… you’re in London, meeting with clients in an old-fashioned looking office, with ornately carved furniture and shelves full of books and scrolls.”
“Yes,” he said softly, “I suppose that was where I practiced law.”
“Now I see you at Black Ruby… You’re filling out a liquor order. Wait, now you’re unpacking blood from the deliveries. And now you’re… Oh.” My cheeks flamed again as I watched an image of myself through Darius’s eyes. He’d just taken my blood, sealing our bond, and though he’d teased me with more sultry innuendo than I could handle, I sensed from the memory that he was practically on fire inside. I felt the strength of our connection surge through me, both in his memory of that moment and in my own mind, right now.
The movie reel spun onward from there, forward and back, showing me glimpses of his past I could only guess at. Centuries, cities, faces, feelings, all of it spinning into a blur.
I opened my eyes, my heart threatening to burst from my chest. I couldn’t process it all.
“His memories are still there, locked away in his blood,” I said. “Or connected to it or… something. I don’t know. There was so much… I’m sorry.” My eyes filled with tears, my body suddenly overwhelmed with emotion.
Darius reached for my face, silently wiping a tear with his thumb. His own eyes were intense, his gaze heavy. I sensed a hundred thoughts forming in his mind, in his heart, yet he
seemed unable to find the words to voice a single one.
Instead, he smiled, and I let out a breath, steadying myself again. Reminding myself that we were in this together. That this was absolutely going to work.
“No, that’s a good thing, Gray,” Haley said. “That means your theory actually holds water, and with a little luck and a whole lot of magic, we might be able to kickstart Darius’s own recall abilities.”
She held up her athame again, instructing us to hold out our hands, palms up.
“Essentially,” she continued, “we need to recreate the blood bond, connecting you both in an unbroken circle. The idea is that your blood, your magic, and the magic of your existing bond will flow from one heart into the other, into the other, into the other, continuously, until there is no longer a separation between the two. Magically speaking, of course.”
“If we need to recreate the bond,” I said, “shouldn’t Darius drink from me? That’s how we did it initially.” Memories of that moment in Black Ruby rushed back, stirring me up inside.
Across from me, Darius arched an eyebrow, his lips twitching with the effort of holding back a smile. He knew exactly what I was thinking about, exactly what that memory was doing to me. He could scent the desire in my blood.
“To create the unbroken circle effect,” Haley said, “you’d both have to drink from each other, and that’s a no-go. We can’t risk turning you. No witch can survive the change.”
I nodded. It was an old refrain, one all witches had learned from a young age. Though we were human, the magic in our blood didn’t mix well with vampire blood. Other than the witch Jonathan had claimed to turn, for which we’d seen no evidence, none of us had ever survived an attempted change. I needed no further proof than Sophie and the other Bay witches Jonathan had murdered by injecting them with vampire blood.
I shook off the cobwebs of those old thoughts. Right now, I had to stay focused on Darius. On our ritual. On what it would feel like later tonight, holding my vampire in my arms, kissing him, talking about all of the things he’d remembered.