by Rae Marks
They could easily have gotten away with only having sex last night, and yet Bray had woken him up in the best manner he could have ever imagined.
He’d let Bray’s hands wander dangerously close to his ass, a place no one touched. Sam only touched his ass to clean it. He’d once considered himself somewhat vers, though he’d always preferred to top. But then… Sam shook his head. He didn’t want to dwell on the past. It would just suck him into a vortex of shame.
That was probably the hardest thing about this whole situation with Bray. The kid was sweet and gentle and sexy as hell. He was someone Sam could probably trust, someone his body seemed to trust already, considering his erection hadn’t wilted as soon as Bray’s fingers had inched so close to his asshole.
What a fucked-up mess. They’d have to talk. Sam would have to set Bray straight. They didn’t need to act out any more sex scenes for their friends listening in.
Chapter Nineteen
Brayden
It was probably the best blow job Bray had ever had. Definitely the best sixty-nine of his life. Then again, he’d only just discovered last night that he loved being rimmed. He could probably come just from having Sam sink his hot tongue into him, sucking at Bray’s opening with thick lips.
Even though his breath hadn’t evened out from what they’d just done, Bray’s dick twitched with interest. He’d have to keep finding ways to tempt Sam.
He didn’t fool himself into believing he’d ever see Sam again after he stepped onto a plane back to the States. He might not ever see his brother again, either. So he’d take the risks he needed to ensure he’d done everything possible to bring his family back together.
If there was one thing Bray had learned, it was to take what he could while he had the chance. People made choices. Sometimes they were forced to make the decisions that pulled them out of your life. Sometimes, they did the forcing. Other times, people just left.
Bray had experienced them all. The only person who had never once let him down in his entire life was his mom. He’d taken this risk as much for her as he had for Nick and his father. His mom deserved her family back.
She was a victim in all this, and yet she’d found forgiveness in her heart. She’d done what she could and had made peace with the rest. Bray wanted to emulate that.
His mom constantly sent invitations to all her sons to every celebration and holiday. And if Bray had been the only consistent attendee for a few years, she never showed any disappointment. She’d been happy to at least have one son there, even though her heart obviously bled with missing the other two.
So Bray had taken this risk to find Mase. And though he was in the middle of a huge mess as he tried to get a moment alone with his brother, he’d selfishly grab a little happiness for himself as well—even if it was fleeting, even if that happiness wasn’t real.
Because Bray simply couldn’t act like what had just happened was an everyday occurrence, he got out of the bed and headed straight for the shower. His silence would probably do enough to make it seem like this was normal to anyone listening in, but what had happened the night before—had simply rocked his world.
He wasn’t sure if sex with Sam was always that good, but in Bray’s experience, sex was never that good. That was all-the-more reason to have as much of it as they could fit in.
Sam was on the bed working on his laptop when Bray got out of the bathroom. In the mirror, Bray saw Sam lift his eyes to watch him get dressed, but they both remained silent. When Bray was fully dressed, Sam shut his laptop with a snap and dropped it on the bed.
“I haven’t heard back from Mr. Kozak. What do you say we go sightseeing again today?”
“Sure,” Bray said. “I’ve heard they have a bar here that’s laid out like a morgue.”
“That’s what you want to see?” Sam shook his head and laughed.
“Not necessarily, but obviously their culture is different here if they find that humorous.”
“I’m sure we can find a lot of quirky things to see. We just want to keep PDA to a minimum. Don’t get testy if I don’t hold your hand. This is hostile territory for queer people. A lot of people here think along the same lines as Sergiy.”
“All right.”
With a final nod, Sam stood and walked into the bathroom, so Bray headed into the living room.
“Well, don’t you look nicely fucked,” Ax said as he pushed a cart on wheels into the dining room. “Got your man wrapped back around your finger, I see.”
“Not sure I’d say that, but he lifted the no-sex rule.”
“So I heard. He must have missed you. I’ve never known him to be so…vocal.”
Ax chuckled as Bray blushed. They quietly set breakfast out. After the past night, Bray was more nervous about spending the day out of the hotel room.
Once they were in the car, Sam asked Ax to jump out and get them some coffee. Bray knew what was coming. As soon as the car door clicked shut behind Ax, Bray decided he’d try to control where this conversation went.
“We don’t have to have a private discussion. Apparently Ax heard everything.”
“I have no doubt. It’s his job to watch my back. He probably gave us some space last night, but I’m sure he wasn’t expecting a reenactment this morning.”
“I don’t know why not. Last night was great. This morning was even better.”
Sam huffed out a laugh but shook his head.
“Look, Sam. You don’t have to let me down easy. Just because I’m younger doesn’t mean I don’t know the score. I’m not over here scribbling my first name and your last name in my notebook, okay?”
That seemed to take the wind out of Sam’s sails. He didn’t reply, but he nodded.
“You had a pretty good time, right?”
Sam snorted. A smile twitched at the corners of Bray's lips, but he pulled it in. He didn’t want to seem cocky.
“I wouldn’t go off like a rocket if I didn’t like what we were doing,” Sam said.
“That’s a rocket? I’d really like to see what you consider having staying power.”
“Bray—”
“I bet you don’t get a lot of ass while you’re undercover.”
Sam’s only response was a tolerant sigh.
“I don’t get a lot while I’m deployed. I’m on leave trying to fix my broken, fucked-up family. You’re in a situation where you’re surrounded by homophobes. We’re attracted to each other. Really, what’s stopping us from enjoying ourselves?”
“You’re my best friend’s kid brother.”
“That excuse went out of the window as soon as your dick breached my ass.”
“I wasn’t exactly planning on fucking you. Things got a little out of hand.”
This time Bray couldn’t stop the smile that stretched his lips. Sam found him irresistible? He’d take that.
“I disagree. We’re both consenting adults, regardless of who my brother is. Besides, I’m sure he doesn’t give two fucks who I have sex with.”
“I beg to differ, and I have tender ribs to prove it.”
“What does that mean?”
“The bath salts. We left them in the car on purpose so I could take the call from Mase that I knew was coming. Instead of calling, he was waiting for me in the garage with a nice love tap to the gut for getting you involved in all this.”
“It really didn’t seem like he recognized me.” Bray shook his head. “I didn’t expect a hug, but a light of recognition in his eyes, or at least…something.”
“It would put you in danger. There’s a reason he’s deep undercover. He’s good at what he does.”
Bray’s heart stuttered and his eyes stung. He’d worried Mase had forgotten he even had brothers—or that maybe he just didn’t care. Sam’s words gave Bray hope. If his brother cared…
“I can guarantee Mase is the reason you only got a few kicks to the ribs. Well, that and you getting a few shots off.”
“Even though he was speaking Ukrainian, I recognized his voice. I thought
I was saved when I heard him, but then…his eyes were so cold when they looked at me.”
“Well, that was probably real. It was probably anger at me for allowing you to get tangled up in this.”
That gave Bray a funny feeling in his stomach. He’d always felt cheated out of having a big brother look out for him the way Mase had before he left. They’d been so close, then Mase had just been gone. But he hadn’t forgotten. Mase had recognized him.
“I’m not sure how your big brother will feel about us fucking like rabbits, especially if he happens to hear something through bugs in our hotel room.”
“If he was the one listening, you wouldn’t have let anything happen between us at all.”
“True. But that doesn’t mean he might not hear bits and pieces.”
“And he’ll either think we’re fucking or faking it, but he lost the right to tell me what to do when he walked away. I’ve lived longer without a big brother than I ever lived with one.”
“He never forgot about you.”
Bray hated the part of him that sat up like a little puppy looking for love—the part that felt all warm at the thought that Mase was out there thinking about him, maybe even worrying about him. Then again, he could have replied to any of the emails Bray had sent.
“Did he ever talk about us? Me and Nick?”
“Mase and I don’t talk about the past. We’ve both done enough things we’re not proud of that we decided to just let the past go.”
Bray nodded and looked out of the window. He was Mase’s past.
“I didn’t mean it like that. He told me he had younger brothers, but obviously he didn’t tell me you guys were twins. He did talk about you a little—just in generic terms, like he never thought he’d miss the lack of privacy you guys gave him. I think he preferred you two digging through his things to our CO.”
Bray smiled at the memory of Mase catching Nick and him after they’d eaten all the Halloween candy Mase had taken as a ‘tax’ from their trick or treat bags. They’d tried to deny it, but they’d still had chocolate on their faces and fingers. Bray had never liked his commanding officer’s, or CO’s, ability to go through his footlocker.
“He probably still sees you as a kid, though you never really want to know about a sibling’s sex life,” Sam said.
“I didn’t realize how much I’d enjoy someone’s tongue inside me.”
A surprised laugh burst out of Sam like a gunshot.
Bray had almost said ‘your tongue’ but had stopped himself in time. It was only Sam’s tongue he imagined. Because this encounter was destined to be brief, Bray was determined to fit in as much as he could while they had the chance.
“You sure don’t pull any punches, do you, kid?”
“Why should I? We’re in a situation where we need to be able to trust each other. You saved my life back at that compound.”
“I told you before, I’m no hero.”
Bray shrugged. “It would have made you look tough if you hadn’t cared if I lived or died.”
“You’re hopeless,” Sam huffed.
“Hopeful, Sam. I’m hopeful. I believe in giving the benefit of the doubt whenever possible.”
“You’re a better man than I am, B.”
Bray smiled at the nickname.
“I also think you should take happiness wherever you can get it. Having sex with you definitely makes me happy, so while we’re here, we should try to give each other as much happiness as possible.”
“You make me sound like the fucking Dalai Lama because I want to ream your ass.”
“Sex can definitely be spiritual.” Bray nodded solemnly.
Sam burst out laughing. Bray didn’t know if that was a yes or a no to his proposal. Then Sam yanked him forward and kissed him until they were both panting. When they pulled apart to get a breath, Sam pressed their foreheads together.
“Your brother’s going to kill me.”
Bray smiled and dove for Sam’s mouth.
Chapter Twenty
Sam
All day, Bray had teased him with small touches and looks as they’d toured the city with Ax. He watched Bray with more interest than he should have. When he was relaxed, Bray smiled easily. When he was embarrassed, he withdrew. When he was nervous or anxious, he took that coin out of his pocket and threaded it through his fingers over and over.
In the afternoon, Sam got a call from Kozak, setting up a meeting for the next day. Disappointment tightened his gut. Things were going to go his way—he felt it in his bones. He had them just where he wanted them, but all Sam wanted was more time with Bray. With tomorrow looming over them, they’d have the make the best of their last night together.
When the meeting was over, he’d figure out a way to get Bray home safe. Then Sam would be off to Thailand for a meeting that would hopefully be much less eventful.
After dinner out in one of the most expensive restaurants in the city, Ax drove Sam and Bray back to the hotel. The mood since his call with Kozak had been much more subdued. That spark was still burning low, but the expiration date on whatever this was between them had just popped up and it was in twenty-four hours.
“Today was really fun,” Bray said as they entered the hotel room.
Sam knew part of it was for show, but he found himself hoping it was also true. Ax bumped shoulders with Sam and tilted his head toward his side of the suite. Sam nodded.
“Night, kid,” Ax said. “Remember the no-clothes rule is restricted to your bedroom.”
“I might deserve pancakes as a reward for putting up him,” Bray muttered once Ax was out of the room.
Sam laughed.
Even though tomorrow would be stressful with the unknown of taking Bray along, tonight Sam felt lighter than he could have imagined. He’d probably smiled and laughed more today than he had in the past year.
What that said about his life he wasn’t sure, but it told him that someone like Bray wouldn’t be single for long. It was hard to be a gay man in the military. He didn’t picture Bray being a life-er. Once he was out, he’d probably find some nice guy, settle down and do whatever it was he dreamed of doing.
Why that had dinner souring in Sam’s gut, he couldn’t say. Sam had never dreamed of a white picket fence. His parents had enough of that. As far as he was concerned, that same fence just seemed like jail bars.
“Bedtime,” Bray breathed as he grabbed Sam’s hand.
He smirked as Bray walked backward toward their bedroom, pulling Sam along with him.
“And you call me ‘old’. You’re heading to bed at eight p.m.”
“First of all, I don’t call you ‘old’. You call me ‘kid’ and I hate it.”
Bray poked Sam in the chest for emphasis. It only made Sam’s smile grow a little wider. He wasn’t sure why the term ‘kid’ bothered him. He was a kid.
“Second, who knows what time it is back home? Time here doesn’t matter because…jet lag. And finally, I didn’t say ‘go to sleep’. I said ‘go to bed’. I might not let you get any sleep at all tonight.”
Sam chuckled. Only a kid would think to give up an entire night of sleep before an important meeting. Sam was willing to try, but only because there was something about Bray. That and the sex had been off-the-charts fantastic.
“Tell me where you want me, Sam,” Bray whispered as they crossed the threshold to their room.
Sam swallowed then blew out a breath. There was so much he would love to do with Bray. The kid was willing to try so many things and he was an open book. For someone like Sam, who needed to be in control in order to let go and get off, that was a total fucking turn-on.
When they reached the bed, Bray fell to his knees and unbuckled Sam’s belt. Sam stopped him by laying his hand over Bray’s. When Bray looked up at him, he shook his head. Bray’s eyes lingered on the bulge behind Sam’s zipper, but he finally released the slacks.
“Undress yourself then get back on your knees.”
Bray was naked and back on the floor in less than
ten seconds. Sam smiled at his enthusiasm. Reaching down, he gave in to the urge to run his fingers through Bray’s hair.
“You want to suck my cock?”
Bray licked his lips. Sam groaned. When Bray hesitated, Sam knew there was something more he wanted.
“What is it, B? Tell me what you want. I just might give it to you.”
“I want…I want to taste you. I want to taste you the way you tasted me.”
Bray’s eyes were hungry and fully dilated. His lids were heavy with lust as he practically begged on his knees for what he wanted. He was trusting Sam with his desire, but Sam didn’t think he could give him that.
Sam’s ass cheeks reflexively clenched together, but something else happened—something that hadn’t happened in well over a decade. His hole twitched. Along with the fear was a longing for things to be different. That had not happened once since those teenage days when his life and part of his sexuality had changed.
“Is everything all right, Sam?”
He erection was completely deflated as the past tried to overtake on him. Closing his eyes for just a moment, he took a deep breath. When he opened his eyes, he looked down at the desire in Bray’s.
His dick started to fill as he saw that Bray was still fully erect. He liked being naked on his knees while Sam was still fully clothed. They could be a very good match sexually, if not for his hang ups.
“Tonight is about you, B. It’s about me pampering you. What do you want me to do to you?”
“Everything,” he breathed without reservation.
“Take my cock out. Get me ready to fuck you.”
Bray groaned even as he unzipped Sam’s pants with deft fingers. He pulled Sam’s erection out of his underwear and swallowed it down without undressing Sam any further.
Sam instinctively snapped his hips forward at the feel of the wet warmth of Bray’s mouth. Bray choked a little. Before Sam could back off, Bray reached around and pulled him forward.
Sam reached back to dislodge Bray’s hands from his ass cheeks before he lost his erection again. The kid gagged himself until Sam had to pull him off, or he was going to blow way too soon.