by Voss, Deja
She tosses me a gold foil bag filled with gummy bears.
“The guy said eat one and wait two hours,” she warns, as I open the top and grab a handful. “I don’t know who he thinks we are though.”
“These are pretty classy, Esther. Maybe Sloan will let us use them as favors at her bridal shower.”
“Use what?” my best friend asks as she joins us in the kitchen. I hold up the bag of pot-laced gummy bears.
“I’m assuming those aren’t family friendly,” she says, raising her eyebrows.
“Have you met my family?” Esther giggles. She’s Gavin’s sister, and was born into the club. Her father used to be the president, and that man was known for being one of the worst human beings to ever walk the face of the earth. Now her husband, Brooks, is the president, and she runs a brothel. She’s a short girl with fiery red hair and is that kind of pretty that makes you hate her and feel drawn to her in the same breath. She can be pure evil if she needs to be, but if you’re on her good side, you have the most loyal friend you could ever imagine for the rest of your life.
Sloan knows exactly what she’s marrying into. Strangely enough, it’s actually a life upgrade for her.
“You know we’re having two showers for you, Sloan. Don’t get yourself all twisted. You get to be in charge of the crappy boring one, and Esther and I will plan the fun one.”
“That’s not how it works, Olive. First of all, I don’t want a crappy boring anything. And second of all, I need your help.”
“I’m just playing, woman. God, eat some gummy bears.”
She pops a couple in her mouth and we start laughing. In about an hour, I have a feeling we’re going to be laughing a lot harder. “We should probably get to work before we can’t,” I say. I slide a binder across the kitchen table and her eyes light up as she begins flipping through.
“This is impressive,” she says. “Unexpected, too.”
“I know you think I’m being a brat about all this, but I’m secretly enjoying it. You know I would do anything for you.”
“Well the rate things are going, she’ll probably get to be doing the same thing here soon for you and Red, huh?” Esther asks. “Looks like you guys had quite the weekend. You guys make a really beautiful couple.”
Sloan turns her gaze to the floor and I just stand there, blinking. Esther is one of my best friends, but I haven’t really told her all the details of my recent adventures. Sure, I had a feeling the pictures would make their way back to the club, everyone around here keeps an eye on Red’s fights. I just didn’t really prepare for the talk that was going to have to go down following.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, Esther. It’s kind of a new thing. And it’s a little more complicated than what’s in those pictures.”
“Well I could definitely get down with that,” she laughs. “Things have been fairly calm around here lately.”
“Yeah,” Sloan says in a weak attempt to change the subject. “It’s been awesome. I get my future husband home at a reasonable hour most of the time and my kid has finally stopped asking where her grandpa is and why does mommy cry all the time.”
“You’re no fun, Sloan,” Esther teases, “and I’d be crying all the time, too, if I had to see Gavin naked every day.”
“So, bridal shower stuff. I figured we could just knock everything out in one day. We can do a Sunday brunch outside with your friends from the hospital, then afterwards we can have a little thing at the ranch with all the old ladies and birdies. Then afterwards…”
“Strippers!” Esther squeals. “Wall to wall waxed chests and giant dongs. I mean, unless you’d prefer something else. I have enough contacts in the business I can get you pretty much anything you want. You just have to give me a little notice if it’s something exceptionally exotic.”
“Do I even want to know what exceptionally exotic means?”
“If you have to ask, Sloan, you probably don’t want it,” she laughs.
“So what do you want to have for lunch?” I ask, pulling out my pink glitter pen and the notepad I have tucked in the binder.
“Well, I already ate lunch. But for some reason I think I want to eat it again,” Sloan says, before bursting into uncontrollable laughter. “I mean, I guess I could just have some more gummy bears.”
“I meant for your shower. No more gummy bears for you, you damn pothead. Although, I could probably eat, too, now,” Esther says. “These suckers have some kick.”
“Yeah, I’m fucking starving.” I shrug. “I think we did enough wedding planning for the day. Let’s make some pizzas and watch TV.”
“Sounds good to me,” Sloan says. “You got any beer? I have a sitter all night, and I feel like I might as well take full advantage of that.”
“Oh my God, are we having a slumber party? I never thought I’d spend another night in this trailer, but I kind of miss it in some sick way.” I actually rent this place from Esther. She lived here before moving in with her husband. She put a lot of money into upgrading it for me, but it still has the same old charm as before and I am in love with it. It suits my needs just perfectly.
“We better tell the boys,” Sloan says, flopping down into the couch. “I mean, like my husband, Esther’s husband, and your boy. Not like you have multiple boys.” She’s digging herself a hole and I don’t know if she’s just too high to realize that she’s making whatever she initially said worse or if she just wants to shove her foot in her mouth right now but can’t stop backpedaling.
“Oh my God!” Esther shouts. “Get out of town.” She grabs a throw pillow from the couch and whales it at me. I can tell she’s put two and two together. “I actually was going to ask you about that, but I think your BFF here just blew up your spot.”
I shoot Sloan daggers from my eyes.
“It’s just, I really like Red, don’t get me wrong. I’ve known him since he was just a young buck scrapping out on the street. But Tank has been madly in love with you since the day he met you. Seeing you with Red would’ve broken his heart. I’ve spent a lot of time with those two, they used to take me to jobs, and every once in awhile I’d overhear them talking about this pact. I never thought much more of it, but now it makes sense.”
“You knew about this?” I ask. “And you didn’t say anything?”
“Honey for all I knew, the pact could’ve been about some club secret or who has to buy more toilet paper when they run out. If they wanted me to know what they were talking about, they would’ve told me. They never specifically came right out and said they were both going to date you. Those two are attached at that hip, though. As weird as it is, I can’t see why it wouldn’t work.”
“Can someone please explain to me how it actually works though?” Sloan asks. “At least the sexy parts.”
“Oh, you mean like getting spit roasted?”
“Esther,” I say, slapping her on the shoulder.
“What? I mean, I’d compare it to Thanksgiving dinner. Fun every once in awhile, not something I want every day. But I bet you’re a stuffing kind of girl, Ollie. Stuffing and gravy.”
Sloan’s eyes just grow wider and wider, and I’m speechless.
“Oh come on,” Esther laughs. “I used to be a prostitute. You think I don’t know a thing or two about a thing or two?”
“I actually haven’t…” I trail off.
“What!?” she asks. “What is the damn point of having two boyfriends who know about each other if that’s not something you do? I mean, unless you’re just into washing two times the dirty underwear.”
“I guess the opportunity just hasn’t presented itself yet.”
“Well make it happen, girl,” Esther says. “You know you want to.”
“You’re a bad influence,” I say. “You think this is going to make things weird for the club? Do you think your brother is going to fire me?”
“My brother would be a bigger moron than he already is if he fired you. And if he does, you can just come up and work at my bar. And as for m
aking things weird with the club, just think about who you’re dealing with for a minute. We’re Mountain Misfits. If you want two wieners in you, by all means, have at her, Ollie.”
Sloan’s jaw drops, and I can’t stop cracking up.
“I’m still confused,” Sloan says. “Do you have like a doll or something you can demonstrate this on?”
“Gimme your laptop, Olive,” Esther says. “I’ll do you one better and show you a video.”
“Hell no, I’m not letting you look at my porn stash,” I giggle. “What’s on my laptop is between me and God, and I’m surprised he hasn’t struck it with lightning yet.”
“You guys are nuts,” Sloan says. “No wonder I have to have two bridal showers.”
“You keep that talk up and you’re on your own for the crappy boring one.” I uncork a bottle of cheap wine and fill our glasses. It feels kind of good letting the cat out of the bag. I can’t help but wonder if the guys are going through the same thing I am right now. I’m sure everyone saw the pictures from the fight last night.
I thought this would be a lot worse than it’s turning out, more embarrassing. I thought people would judge me pretty hard. Seeing everyone just react without surprise makes me think I really underestimate how much my friends care about me. That or I overestimate the way they perceive me.
Either way, I have two boyfriends, and tomorrow I’m going to take Esther’s advice and celebrate Thanksgiving in July. Tonight, though, is all about these ladies I’m so happy to have as my friends. I take a big gulp of my wine and sit down on the recliner. Sloan’s already passed out, drooling on her shirt. Esther and I crack up.
We might be a bunch of misfits, but at least we get to enjoy this life together.
18
Tank:
“Well I’m off the hook for the rest of the night,” Gavin says. We’re sitting around the clubhouse bar. We’re the only guys around tonight, just the officers of the club and two new prospects, Ranger and Rocco, tending bar.
“Same here,” Brooks says. “Looks like they’re having a slumber party at your old lady’s house, Red. I know the perfect spot we can spy on them if you want. I used to creep on Esther when she lived there.”
“That’s my sister, you sicko,” Gavin says.
“Doesn’t bother me any if she wants to make out with your fiancée so long as I can watch them from the bushes.”
“I guess we won’t be seeing Ollie tonight,” Red says. “She call you?”
I pull out my phone from my pocket. “Not that I know of.”
“Me neither,” he mutters. “It’s your night. You sure you have service here?”
“Oh for fucks’ sake,” Brooks laughs. “You guys are seriously still on that pact deal? I knew it. I just knew it.”
“Why wouldn’t we be?” Red asks. “And why’s it any of your business?”
“I thought you guys were kidding is all,” he says. “I assumed it was just a phase or something.”
“I personally think it’s beautiful,” Heat says. He’s an older guy, the chaplain of our club, and even though he never settled down himself, he’s always been the best person to go to for advice on matters of the heart. “There’s no sense in you boys fighting over women. I’ve seen this place ripped to shit more than once on account of that.”
“Are you having your period or something?” Gavin laughs. “There’s nothing beautiful about thinking about these two all sweaty and naked in the same room.”
“Maybe beautiful wasn’t the word I was looking for. Practical. I can only imagine what a fight between these two would look like, and I’m pretty sure nobody wants to be in charge of cleaning that up.”
“Nobody wants to be responsible for cleaning up whoever’s bedroom this weird shit goes down in either,” Gavin says. “That poor girl.”
“Oh let’s be honest, you know it’s never going to come down to fists,” Red says, shrugging. “The best man is going to win hands down. And if it’s a competition, we all know old Tank is the best man. It’s only a matter of time before I do something to fuck everything up.” It kind of strikes a nerve with me. I thought the whole purpose of the pact was that there was no competition. It was always going to be the three of us, ride or die. You start throwing out choices and who’s the better man and it just turns into more fuel to my burning insecurity.
“I don’t know how someone can be so smart and so stupid at the same time,” Heat laughs. “And you’re awfully fucking quiet over there, Tank.”
“How is that any different than any other day?” I ask.
“So true. Well, if everyone’s old ladies are occupied tonight, none of you have any excuses not to get fucked-up with Uncle Heat. You know, Gavin, your old man and I used to share some ladies back in the day. Those were some good times.”
“Yeah, maybe you’re my real dad, Heat. Can I have some money?”
“Trust me, son, nobody in their right mind would’ve touched your mother with a ten-foot pole,” he chuckles. “Not even me, and my standards are pretty much as low as they go.”
I can’t help but feel a little more confident knowing that things are going to be alright, at least with the club. These people are like my family. The fact that they accept me for who I am is part of the reason why I love them so much. We accept everyone, as long as you’re a halfway decent person, though.
Everything feels so normal, so casual, and not having to hide our feelings for Ollie is going to make life a lot easier. I chug the shot of Jameson in front of me and figure I can deal with whatever kind of hangover tonight might bring tomorrow at the shop, even if it means locking myself in the office.
Red taps his beer to mine with a knowing smile. We’ll let Olive have her fun with the ladies tonight. For now, it’s all about the MC.
19
Olive:
For as much wine we consumed last night, and the amount of gummy bears that we probably shouldn’t have eaten, I woke up today feeling spryer than usual, even though my back is all jacked from sleeping on the armchair. I haven’t had a solid girls’ night in a long time, and it was definitely much needed. I know I’ve supported those girls through some interesting times in their lives, and my current situation doesn’t even seem like a situation in comparison, especially after last night.
Still, I miss my men. It’s funny how you can spend years actively avoiding someone, but the day the air clears, all you want to do is spend every waking second with them. I laughed this morning when I looked at my phone for the first time since getting back to town and had about twenty missed calls and the same amount of texts from the two of them. I made sure I apologized to both of them, and I can tell by the way they both were grunting and coughing that they both had a little bit too much fun last night with the other guys in the club.
I spend the afternoon downtown doing a little grocery shopping. I figure I’ve been eating at the guys’ house pretty much every day for the last week, and I might as well chip in. I want to have a nice dinner tonight, just the three of us, and do some catching up.
That, and I feel like tonight is the night the three of us should actually get together for real. The thought excites me and terrifies me at the same time. I want it to be perfect.
I let myself into their house. I figure I have about an hour before they get home from work, and I get busy seasoning a pot roast and peeling potatoes, slicing them up and putting them in a pot of water. I giggle at how domesticated I feel right now. Any man would be lucky to come home to what I have prepared.
Especially the part that involves that black lingerie that never saw the light of day this weekend. It’s a sheer bodysuit that cuts into a thong in the back. It definitely hides nothing and accentuates everything. Just the sight of it on my body makes me drip. I know I look hot, the black high heels just contributing to this super slutty aesthetic that I’m so good at pulling off.
I curl my hair and put on some hot pink lipstick. I light the ‘sex candle’ on the mantel for good luck and giggle, thinking ab
out that time Tank first brought me here. I make sure the oven is set a little lower than it needs to be so that we don’t get carried away and lose track of time and burn the damn house down. I practice my seductive pose, bending over the island in the kitchen.
The roar of their bikes in the driveway hits me right in the core. I hear the door swing open, and my heart races.
“Something smells good in here,” Tank says.
“Oh yeah?” I ask with a wink, staring over my shoulder at him. The look on his face is priceless. He stops dead in his tracks, licking his lips.
“I smell pot roast. And sex candle,” Red says. I hear the door close behind him. “I don’t really know which one turns me on more.”
“Shut up, Red,” I say, smiling, batting my eyelids at him.
“Well isn’t this a nice surprise,” he says. “Turn around and let us see that beautiful body.”
I take a deep breath and turn to the two of them. I reach out for Tank’s face, kissing him on the lips. I turn my attention to Red, kissing him as well, feeling his tongue invading my mouth as Tank’s hand explores my body through the flimsy lingerie. Sandwiched between the two of them, there’s only one thing on my mind.
I slide the straps down on my bodysuit, letting my breasts flow over the top. They each take a nipple in their mouths, and even though they both feel different, I can tell they both want the same thing by the way they’re groping me and nipping at my flesh. They could rip me in half right now if they wanted to.
I’m not afraid though. I crave this more than anything in the world.
“I think maybe it’s time you showed Tank what kind of woman you really are,” Red says, stroking my cheek. He grabs my hair in his fist, tugging it hard enough that I moan. I drop to my knees in front of them, reaching up to unzip both of their jeans. I slide Tank’s boxer briefs down, pulling out his rock-hard erection, taking it in my hand, feeling his girth grow as I stroke him. I use my other hand to do the same for Red, his dick throbbing so hard, he’s already oozing cum from the tip. I take it in my mouth, swirling my tongue around, tasting him for the first time.