“It’s happened again, I’ve done it again. I’m being punished.”
“I don’t understand.”
“He’s not moving, I can’t feel him, Mason.” She grabbed my hand and placed it on her tummy, I moved it around and couldn’t feel him kicking either.
“Let’s get you to the hospital.” I tried to stay as calm as possible, knowing that if she lost this baby too that I would lose her. She would let the darkness claim her. I tugged the duvet off of her and grabbed her leggings that were beside the bed, helping her into them and pulled one of my hoodies over her head.
“I can’t…” She pushed me away from her. “I can’t do it… I can’t hear those words again, Mason. I can’t.”
“It’ll be ok.” I pulled her against my chest and she cried. I rubbed my hand over her head and my chest constricted. I was scared. “Come on.” I placed one hand on her back and the other under her knees and carried her down the stairs, only stopping to slip on my boots. She reached up and unlocked the door and I had her buckled into the car within minutes, running back up the steps to lock the house back up.
Cammie
I WILLED our son to move for the whole car journey. Mason was quiet and he kept one hand on my leg as he drove. We pulled into the hospital and I stared up at the grand building, not wanting to get out of the car. Mason pulled my door open and helped me out, I felt like I was in a daze, like I was a different person watching all of this unfold. That if I didn’t believe this was happening then everything would be ok. Mason led me into the reception by the hand and I looked around at all the people that were sitting in the reception. Some were waiting to be seen, some had cuts on their hands, sick children on their laps and others were staring into space with tears running down their faces. I could hear the distant sound of Mason talking but I couldn’t make out what he was saying.
“Cam?” I looked up at him and he wound his arm around my back and led me to a set of lifts. “We need to go to the third floor, they know we’re coming.” I stood beside him clutching hold of his hand, I felt like a zombie following obediently behind him. He’d done all the talking and I stood quietly beside him. It wasn’t until I was laying on a hospital bed and the doctor in front of me kept asking questions did I realise that this was really happening to me.
“Cammie?” I looked up when Mason said my name. He nodded his head to the doctor and I looked at her. She was an older woman, with dark black hair and mesmerizing blue eyes.
“Cammie, when was the last time you felt him kick?” She was fiddling with the machine in front of her as she asked these questions.
“I… I don’t remember.”
“That’s ok, let’s have a look.” She pushed my top off my tummy and squeezed some gel onto it, moving around the wand. I held my breath not wanting to hear her say those words when the most amazing sound filled the room. His heart was beating, I exhaled my held breath and burst into tears.
“He’s ok?” I sobbed.
“Yes, he’s doing very well.” She angled the screen towards us so we could see.
“Why couldn’t she feel him?”
“My guess would be that he was sleeping, but you are a little dehydrated you need to keep your fluids up. If you find yourself in this situation again try eating something sweet, drinking a cold drink and making lots of noise. If your baby doesn’t respond to this then come back.”
“Thanks, doc,” Mason said gripping hold of my hand. “You ok, Cammie?” I looked up at him and nodded. “Let’s get you home.”
Cammie
I WAS LYING on the sofa after finishing my shift at work, concentrating on the baby. I wasn’t sure if I had felt him move again and I didn’t want to go back to the hospital just after being there last week. I was panicked.
“Hello?” Mason answered his phone.
“I can’t feel him moving,” I blurted.
“Sweetheart, have you tried eating something sugary or a really cold drink?”
“No, I forgot about that.” I climbed to my feet and walked into the kitchen. Dusty jumped around my feet and I had to concentrate not to trip over her. I opened the back door and she flew outside. I rummaged through the cupboard until I found some chocolate and poured myself some water and grabbed some ice cubes from the freezer and I sat on the stool at the breakfast bar.
“Do you want me to come home?”
“No,” I told him as I took a bite of the chocolate. “Where are you anyway?”
“It’s a surprise.” I could hear him mumbling to someone else, it sounded like he had covered the phone so I couldn’t hear. “Any movement yet?”
“No.” I took a sip of the ice cold drink. “Oh wait… Yes. Thank God.” I sighed in relief. How was I going to cope like this for the next seventeen weeks?
“Great, I’ll be home in two hours. I need you to be showered and ready for me, we’re going out.”
“Where are we going? What shall I wear?” I sat up straighter in my seat.
“It’s a surprise and I’ll bring something for you to wear.”
“Ok.” I smiled. “I can’t wait.”
“Love you,” he said and ended the call.
I had two hours and we were going out, I think a nap was needed and then I’d start getting ready. I got the dogs in, gave them a treat each and headed upstairs for a lie down.
“CAM?” Mason called out as he walked in through the partially open bedroom door. He was looking sexy in a black tux, with a white shirt and black dickie bow tie.
“Wow, look at you?” I smiled. “What’s the occasion? You didn’t even wear a tux on our wedding day.” I sauntered towards him and placed my hands on his chest. I was almost ready, my hair was straightened and kept down, just the way Mason liked it. I had put on neutral make-up as I didn’t know what colour dress I was going to be wearing and my usual red lipstick that Mason also loved.
“I have a present for you.” He passed me a box, hooking a dress bag up on the back of the bedroom door. I sat down and opened the box.
“What’s this?”
“It’s a baby foetal Doppler heart monitor. We can hear the baby’s heartbeat with this. So if, for any reason, you’re unsure if you felt him move or just want to be sure, you can use this.” I was stunned, he knew the fears I battled with daily and although I had been to a few counselling session, I was still terrified that I was going to lose our baby.
“Oh, Mason. Thank you.” I stood up and wrapped my arms around him. I tilted my head back, offering him my lips and he didn’t disappoint. He pressed his lips gently to mine, making sure that he didn’t ruin my make-up.
He grabbed the dress bag from the door and held it to me. “I need you to wear this, and we’ll be leaving in ten minutes. I have shoes for you downstairs.”
“Ok.” I laid the bag on the bed and began to unzip it as Mason left the room. I gasped in surprise as I saw the material, it was silver and glittery. I held the dress up to me and looked at myself in the floor length mirror, it would show off my bump perfectly. I pulled the zip down at the back of the dress, untied my dressing gown and let it fall to the floor. I stepped into the dress and shimmied it up my body. The material was soft and silky and it had a built in bra, though I wasn’t convinced it would hold me in since my breasts had grown so much in the last few weeks. I reached behind me and pulled the zip up. At the back, it ended just below my shoulder blades and it was strapless. It flowed to the floor and clung to my hips, tummy and bum. I turned around to catch a glimpse of the back, making sure my bum didn’t look too big. Mason was always telling me that from behind I didn’t even look pregnant. I was glad that it was the end of July and still fairly warm as I didn’t have a jacket to go with a dress like this. I was excited to see where we were going. I grabbed my black clutch bag and headed out of the bedroom and down the stairs. Mason was standing at the bottom waiting for me, I picked the end of my dress up in my hand and Mason met me half way offering me his hand.
“You look amazing. Do you like the dress?”
“Yes, thank you.”
“Do you want to wear flat shoes or heels?” He pointed to two pairs of silver shoes on the floor, one were ballet flats and the others were a four inch heel, sandal with a buckle with intricate diamante detailing.
“Definitely the heels.” I smiled and he got down onto one knee and helped me put them on.
“Good choice.” He smiled as he kissed the inside of my ankle.
Beep. Beep. Beep.
“What’s that?” I asked placing my foot back on the floor.
“That’s our lift.” He held his arm out to me and I placed my hand in the crook of his arm. He pulled the door opened and I squealed when I saw the long black limo sitting at the end of our driveway.
“Is that for us?” I asked as he gently pushed me outside, locking the door behind us.
“Yes.” We proceeded towards the limo and before he opened the door, I reached up to his ear and whispered;
“I may just have to get on my knees in that limo and thank you in a good way.” He shuddered underneath my touch. He pulled open the door and I was greeted by the sound of laughter, I looked inside and the limo was full of our friends. I glanced back at Mason and he winked at me. “Or not,” I mumbled to myself. I climbed inside to find Heather and Blade dressed up like us, Blade was also in a tux and Heather was wearing a fire engine red long dress. Ashlyn was there too in a dark blue floor length dress with ruffles around the top and on the sleeves and Toes, Tat, Solar and Drake sat in smart trousers, shirts and their cuts. I laughed to myself how their jackets were almost like their security blankets. I was surprised to see that Mason and Blade weren’t wearing theirs.
“Where are we going?” I asked, looking around at everyone as the limo started moving.
“Our lips are sealed,” Heather said. “You look amazing, how’s my nephew?” She asked, rubbing her hand on my tummy.
“He’s good.” Heather and I were so close, practically like sisters and she always referred to me as auntie Cammie to her kids. I was happy to be able to do the same when this little one was born.
Everyone, except for me, had a glass of champagne and I had sparkling water, the conversation was flowing around us and I was happy that everyone was together. I didn’t get to see as much of Heather as I would like to. The car slowed down and I looked out the car window to see we had stopped in front of a large hotel. Everyone filed out and Mason held my hand as we walked towards the large set of doors. Once we were inside, there was a large sign displaying the event we were attending.
‘SANDS (Stillbirth & neonatal death charity) charity auction’
I stopped walking and looked around at everyone, they all stopped and looked at me.
“Cam…” Heather began and Mason held up his hand to stop her.
“Go on in, we’ll be just a minute.” They all carried on in to the lavish ballroom, music was drifting out to us and I caught a glimpse of people dancing.
“I can’t go in there.” I backed away from Mason and he held my hand in a tight grip.
“Why can’t you?” He bent his knees so he could look into my eyes.
“Look at me, I’m six months pregnant and you want to take me into a room where people have lost their babies. That’s just not right.”
“Cammie, you are one of those women. I thought this would be good for you, to talk to other people that have gone through what you have?”
“No, Mason. It won’t feel right.”
“I’ve been speaking to the lady in charge of this event, she knows what you went through and that we are expecting a baby boy and she is really keen to meet you.” He pressed a kiss to my hand and I looked over his shoulder at the ballroom. People were laughing, joking and drinking. “It’s just a room full of rich men and women who are raising money for a great cause.”
“Ok, I’ll try. But if I feel uncomfortable, we can leave?”
“Absolutely and we can get back to the promise of you giving me head in the limo.” He laughed. I smacked him on the chest and he held hold of my hand and led me into the ballroom.
Mason
I WAS SO VERY proud of Cammie, I knew she was worried about making other people feel uncomfortable but everyone was so kind to her. She had started talking to one woman, Pamela who gave birth to a still born and she herself was also pregnant. They moved off together to talk somewhere quieter a little while ago and I was now trying to find her.
I came across her talking to Cynthia, the organiser of this particular event. She was a lady in her early sixties, she had grey hair tied up into some sort of twist, a long flowing green ball gown and a silver clutch thing, one like Cammie had, that held their lipstick and shit in.
I sidled up beside Cammie and slipped my arm around her waist, kissing her on the side of her head. She smiled up to me and I took the hand Cynthia offered and kissed it politely. I didn’t want to interrupt their conversation.
“I’d love to help out more,” Cammie added. “How can I help?”
“Well, tonight is about building money for a new centre, one where mums and dads can feel comfortable coming and talking. We’re looking to venture into the southwest.”
“Wow, that’s great.” Cammie looked like she was thinking. “This is an auction right?”
“Yes. We have several items donated from people and they can go around the room.” She pointed to a set of tables. “And bid on the item you want. People have been very generous. There is a trip for two to Italy…”
“I want to donate…”
“That’s very kind of you, but…”
“My boys.” She nodded her head as the guys and Heather and Ashlyn started walking towards us. “Auction them off, for a date night.”
“Whoa, hold on a minute,” Toes complained.
“That’s very generous and probably would go down well, they’re all very handsome.” Cynthia smiled.
“It’s for a good cause, brother.” I chuckled.
“You too,” Cammie said to me and my face fell. Blade started laughing and Heather dug him in the ribs with her elbow.
“Oh look at that, Blade just volunteered himself.” Heather smiled.
“What?” He looked at her, annoyance covering his face.
“This is a marvellous idea, Cammie. Thank you.” Cynthia hugged her and then looked at all of us. “Follow me, boys.”
“You better win,” I growled at her.
“I don’t have any money,” she said gesturing with her hands.
“I’ll sort it. Bid big, baby.” I winked at her and followed the guy backstage.
Cammie
“HELLO, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,” Cynthia began as she stood on the stage. “With thanks to Mrs. Cammie Cole, we have another auction about to take place. Ladies, gather around. This is for a date night with a badass biker.” The crowd cheered and clapped and I loved how much the other women were up for this.
“Are you going to bid on Blade?” I asked Heather.
“Maybe, I haven’t decided yet.” She laughed, taking a sip from her cocktail glass. “What about you Ash? Gonna bid on one?” Heather asked.
“Maybe, just as it’s a good cause.”
“Here we go, ladies, first up is Toes, he’s thirty two, a member of the Cornish Crusaders MC and he got his name from a fetish for women’s feet. Turn around so they can see all the goods.” She laughed and Toes did as she had asked. “Let’s start the bidding at fifty pounds.”
“Fifty quid?” he complained.
“One hundred pounds!” someone called out.
“A hundred and fifty!” A counter offer came in and it went on like that until he was sold for three hundred pounds.
“Wow, the ladies are loving this. Good idea, Cam,” Heather praised me.
“Next up, ladies, is Holes. Now I have to tell you this one is a married man, he’s also the Vice President of his biker club and his nickname comes from him being a piercer. Isn’t he looking dashing in his tux?”
“Two hundred pounds!” someone called out
and my head whipped around to see who it was, did she not just hear Cynthia say he was a married man.
“Three hundred, take the jacket off!” someone else shouted.
“You heard them, jacket off.” Cynthia smiled. Mason obliged and unbuttoned his jacket and let it fall down his arms.
“Four hundred. What does he have pierced?” I looked again and it was the same woman who bid first. Mason pointed to his eyebrow, lip and stuck his tongue out.
“Holy shit! Six hundred!” a woman called out who was obviously turned on by his piercings.
“You better save him,” Heather told me.
“Seven hundred!” the first woman shouted.
“Fuck,” I swore under my breath. “One thousand pounds.”
“Sold!” Mason shouted, pointing at me and I laughed. It would definitely be money well spent.
The auction continued as Mason prowled over to me. “I hope you wasn’t going to let someone else win me?” His hands were on my hips and my tummy was flat against him.
“Well, technically, you won yourself as I have no money.”
“I’ll lend it to you.” He rose his eyebrows to his hairline whilst chuckling.
“That’s Tat, Drake and Solar done!” Heather shouted to me, invading our bubble.
“Oh, how much did they make?”
“Tat went for five hundred. Solar for nine hundred and Ashlyn won Drake for four hundred.”
“You bid on Drake?” Mason asked her.
“It’s for a good cause, I’m only making sure I’m helping. I didn’t want to get punched if I won Blade.” She laughed.
“Ok, ladies, the last one of the evening. This is Blade, he is the President of the Devon Destroyers MC. He’s also married with three kids.”
“Hundred pounds.”
“Two hundred.”
“Three hundred.”
“Five hundred.”
“Seven hundred!” Heather called out.
“Eight hundred.” We looked to the side and there was a tall slim woman with long dark straight hair in a black dress biding against Heather.
“Nine hundred.” Heather bid.
South Coast Brothers Part 1 Page 48