by Leeah Taylor
Josie nearly knocks me off my feet when she crashes into me. My body aches as the adrenaline drains out and my wolf whines to stretch out her legs. She practically growls from my depths when I force her down.
“Are you all okay?” I ask Josie, expecting the worst.
“Yeah, are you?”
I slowly shake my head. “Not even a little.”
Tristan locks eyes with me, and the three lines down his face are bright red and inflamed. Even though I’m pissed, I look him over and worry creeps in when I notice his bandaged, bloody arm.
I glare as I swallow up the space between us and fuss over the makeshift bandage, trying to pull it away to see the damage but he swats my hands away.
“What the hell happened?”
“It’s nothing. Just a few cuts.”
I reach for the blood-soaked strips of shirt. “Yeah, we’ll see.”
But he slaps my hands away again. “I said it’s nothing. We need to get moving.”
“Fine, but that gets fresh bandages when we can stop and set up camp.”
“Sure.”
Now to figure out where exactly we’re supposed to go. Where can I safely take two dozen people for the rest of the night? We could drive until the bus inevitably runs out of gas and hope it’s somewhere we can make home again.
“Factory is about a mile from here,” Tristan points out. “Set up there for the night.”
I drag my hand down my face. “You and that fucking factory.”
He shrugs. “I’m committed.”
“Yeah, clearly. Okay, let’s go to the factory. But a quick sweep needs to be done before we let all these people in there.”
Tristan holds up his hands. “Whatever you say.”
“Alright everyone,” I shout over the chatter. “Back on the bus, we’re leaving.” They load back onto the bus and I turn to Tristan. “Think you can drive?”
“I got them here, didn’t I?”
“Berkeley,” Carver calls to me.
Tristan glares past me and I roll my eyes. “Give it a rest.”
He scowls before turning away and heading for the bus. Now is not the time for his tantrum, and I know it’s coming. The moment on the roof is far from over, merely on hold, and when shit finally settles down, the real showdown will kick off.
“We’re going to a factory about a mile from here.”
“That abandoned one not too far from where we collided?” Cooper asks.
“Yeah.”
He thinks about it, eyeing Carver, and they both nod. “Nothing there, but we didn’t find any signs of Ferals either. Should be okay for a night.”
Is this how fate works? No matter what, Carver and I were meant to finally crash into each other’s lives right at that moment in the woods?
“Good,” I mumble under my breath. “Tristan will be thrilled.”
I can already hear him with grand ideas.
Why don’t we just stay here?
We can make it better than the school.
And how long before we’re facing the same outcome? We’ve barely managed as it is. It’s probably a miracle we made it as long as we have. Right now, all I can think about is getting these people somewhere safe for a night.
I’m wary when I load onto the bus. Tristan looks worse than a couple cuts and I have to wonder what happened from the time he left us on the roof to the bridge.
I settle into the first seat closest to the front of the bus to keep an eye on him. Carver slides in beside me and slips his hand over mine with a squeeze.
It’s the lives you save that matter, Berkeley. His voice soothes through my mind.
Someone has to be responsible for the ones lost, though. I glance down at his hand covering mine and tug it free.
He sighs both beside me and in my head. People die, baby. It’s just how the world is. It was then as much as it is now.
It doesn’t mean we have to like it. Back then, people were dying of old age and cancer. Not because of things from nightmares, movies, and books.
When we get to the factory I’m adamant of another quick sweep and while Carver made me promise to stay outside with the bus, he took his guys and did the sweep without argument. They gave the all clear ten minutes later.
By the time I made sure everyone was inside and settled, I was ready to collapse. Instead, I made my way up to the roof and took my place beside Carver to keep watch.
“Go get some sleep.”
“I don’t need sleep. I need to keep these people safe.”
Carver turns to me. “And I will. Sleep, Berkeley.”
I tuck my legs in and cross my arms. “No.”
He scoffs. “Fucking sassy pain in the ass. Always were.”
“And you loved it.”
“Hmm… I loved how that sassy mouth made me hard.”
I shove him and he only laughs. “Carver!”
“What? It’s true.”
Heat creeps into my cheeks as I lay my head on his shoulder and train my attention on the treeline. “I’m sorry about your dad.”
And my heart hurts. Squeezed tight in my chest, making it hard to blink back the tears. Somehow it all made me very selfish. Hell, I am selfish.
“I was scared and lost hope in you, Carver. It’s an excuse, I know, but in that fear it was easier to believe you had abandoned me for the pack.” I suck in a heavy breath. It’s not the full truth, but it’s all I’m willing to give him. “I guess that fear steadily turned to anger.”
He heaves a sigh. “Nobody told me losing my mate would be worse than losing my father. I guess we both let our emotions turn into hatred.”
Hate is easy. With hate I could bury Carver, us, and our life before the world ended down as deep as it could go; let it all become a forgotten memory.
Loving him was hard.
Missing him was harder.
But hating him, convincing myself he left me behind, easy.
“What now Carver?”
“Now, you get some sleep, little Spitfire. Let me keep you safe.”
“I’m not tired.”
After the day and night I’ve had, I should be out cold but I can’t shake the heavy feeling settling inside of me, waiting for the next bad thing to happen. If I close my eyes, there’s a chance they won’t open again.
Carver hooks a finger under my chin and tilts my head back. His icy blue eyes are a softer shade and the look warms through me.
“I said sleep. I didn’t say leave my side.”
He leans back against a brick partition and tugs me closer to settle between his legs. I rest my head on his chest and under his chin with a small smile.
The next time I open my eyes, it’s to an early morning sky and dead silence. It was something I never got used to. The silence. Sure, the birds still sing and leaves still rustle with the wind. But the world is devoid of artificial noise. There’s no racing traffic or honking horns. Or the hum of power lines above. It’s both unsettling and peaceful. One world lost. Another found. We traded shit humans for bloodthirsty dead ones.
I sit up, rolling out the aches settled in my neck and shoulder.
“Sleep well?” His voice makes me flinch and he chuckles. “Sorry.”
If there was anything I missed, it’s waking up to him and his cool blue eyes looking back at me. As if to promise today will be better than the last. With one look, it’s a new promise.
He cocks his head to the side with a lopsided grin. “What is it?”
I turn the rest of the way to face him and move to straddle his lap.
Carver’s hands slip over my hips firmly. “What are you doing?”
I let out a small laugh. “I have no fucking idea.”
It feels a lot like the first one. Just as awkward and foreign, back when it was two best friends in very strange territory. But it all comes rushing back when my lips capture his and his hands close around my cheeks to pull me closer. A warmth prickles through me down to my toes, making them curl. Then it’s an inferno of scraping desire cha
sing behind it, while I fight for control with my wolf. She demands to be allowed to the surface to claim what she craves and sate the broken bond between us.
I’m inclined to let her, about to drop those walls and let my wolf tear out of my depths, when a door opens and I jerk back. The regret is instant the moment I lock eyes with Carver because I know what he’s thinking.
“Hey lovebirds,” Cooper practically sings. “I’d say I’d come back, but we’re on the clock here.”
Carver pushes me off his lap gently and the disappointment sets in. His expression is stone, but I know he has a million wrong ideas going on in his head.
“We should get going,” he says, putting distance between us. “Need every bit of daylight we can get.”
I reach for him, but he pulls further away. “Carver it’s—”
“No big deal. We really should get going.”
It’s a huge deal, though. I can see it written all over his face and it hurts more than I expect it to. And I’m pretty sure my wolf has turned her back on me and stormed off too. That’s great. Really great. Carver, my wolf, and probably his own are all mad at me. Grand way to start the day.
“Fine.”
Cooper looks from me to Carver and shakes his head. “Y’all are making this shit way too hard.”
“Screw off,” I grumble and push past him to the door.
“Missed you too, Spitfire,” Cooper yells down the stairwell. I give him the finger and his laugh follows me.
Asshole.
God, I really… fucking missed him and I can’t even lie to myself about it. Car and Coop were never one without the other. And I miss them both. Their friendship. Our bond. The comfort of knowing I had two people who had my back no matter what.
Cramps and chocolate cravings at three in the morning? My boys were to the rescue.
Cuddle in bed and binge bad movies kind of day? My boys were there.
Pissed at the world and ready to go on a rampage? My boys were there to carry the baseball bat and help me bury the body after.
So why didn’t they look for me? Why did Carver find me gone and give up? Like our whole fucking lives together didn’t matter?
Tristan stops me at the bottom of the stairs. “Berkeley?”
I glare at him. “What?”
“The hell is the matter with you?”
You! You’re what’s the matter! I’m screaming inside and all I can do is grit my teeth. He looks worse than last night. Paler. Just how bad are these cuts? He pulls away when I reach for his freshly bandaged arm.
“It’s fine.”
“You don’t look fine.”
“Well, I haven’t slept in like thirty-six hours and yesterday wasn’t exactly a spa day.”
I don’t appreciate his clipped tone, and I cross my arms. Fine. Whatever.
“What do you need?”
He eyes Carver and Cooper as they come down the steps behind me and my bitch levels escalate.
“Tristan, what?”
“Nothing, nevermind.”
I can’t care enough to stop him when he walks away.
“We need somewhere to actually go.” I turn to the boys. “Any ideas?”
Cooper grins. “We do, actually.”
I follow him and Carver outside, where Cooper lays out a map on an old picnic table and points to a spot north of us.
“What is it? Looks like nothing but mountains.”
His grin grows bigger. “Because it is. And where we call home.”
“And you’re smiling about it because?”
Cooper lifts his gaze from the map. “It’s the Mountain, Berkeley.”
He can’t mean the Mountain. The imaginary place was nothing more than old wolves telling stories. Wishing there was a place like it to get away from the humans to be what they were meant to be. Animals.
But Cooper’s grin is wide, reaching from ear to ear, and Carver’s is mostly nostalgic. We listened to his father drone on about that old Mountain for years. Even he used to say it wasn’t much more than a pipe dream.
“Plenty big, Berk,” Carver says. “For everyone. Even big enough for your boyfriend’s ego.”
My eyes roll hard and I’m certain I see Carver’s fingers twitch at his side. I bet he misses the sting on his palm from teaching my ass a lesson. My wolf perks up, my sex clenches, and I resist another eye roll.
Kinky ho, she grumbles in my depths.
Everyone is looking to me to decide, and I’ve never wanted to scream it from the rooftops more. I’m not their leader. I’m not the one in charge. But it wouldn’t matter. They’d still look to me.
If they only knew their supposed “fearless” leader was scared as hell.
“How long of a trip?”
Cooper shrugs. “Depends on how good the roads treat us. We haven’t taken them or even checked them in ages. There are faster trails through the woods.”
“Because you’re a bunch of filthy dogs,” Tristan snaps out nastily as he pushes through the others. “You ever stop to think we’d like a say in whether we’d want to live with them? Monsters just like Ferals.”
“Monsters?” Carver growls. His fists clenched tight. “Who do you think were the ones on the frontline when shit got bad fighting the Ferals? Hmm? You humans?”
Fuck me. Could we go five minutes without the two of them devolving into a pissing contest? Nevermind the fact Carver’s argument is entirely true. The only reason humans found out about shifters was because of the Ferals. Humans couldn’t fight them. They were dead the moment they stood in their line of sight. Shifters were faster and stronger. And unaffected by the fever that started it all.
I step into Tristan’s path before he can do anything stupid. Like get his head ripped right off with the very agitated alpha edging against my wolf.
“Enough. You wanted me to take charge. We’re going.”
“Because your little lap dog says so?”
What in the hell has gotten into him? “No, because it’s our best chance.” There’s nothing but angry contempt staring back at me. It’s too bad. “Cooper, you drive.”
“You got it, Spitfire.”
“I want everyone ready to go in fifteen minutes.” I don’t take my hard stare from Tristan’s and wait until the others have walked away to pack up. “What has gotten into you?”
His eyes flicker past me and I’m about fed up with the bullshit.
“No, look at me.” He’s never looked at me with more icy fury. It’s almost hatred. “Stop making this personal. It’s not. It’s what’s best for the twenty something people that I’m responsible for. Not you. You have a problem with me, then say so. You have a problem with Carver, well there he is. It’s done, right now.”
Tristan takes a step closer, invading the little bit of space between us. I can feel Carver and his alpha exploding behind me. Their territorial aggression throttles me.
Stay out of it.
Tristan’s head cocks to the side. “Tell me something, baby.” Another deafening wave of warning flashes through me, but I hold my ground. I’ll kick Tristan’s ass and then Carver’s if that’s what it’ll take. “Did it ever occur to you it’s because of him and those dogs the Ferals showed up at all? Maybe it’s them they want?”
I’m really thinking he’s delusional. Just finally went off the deep end. We’ve seen it before. This world isn’t for the weak and even the strongest cave to the weight of it all sometimes. Or it’s pure hatred and jealousy dumbing him down.
“Get some sleep, Tristan.”
He grabs me by the arm when I go to walk away and before Carver, or Cooper, can react, I turn back swinging. Pain jolts through my fist into my wrist and Tristan falls back, holding his nose as blood pours out.
“It’s done! You’re on that bus when we leave or you’re not. But if you are, then this tantrum is over.” I shake out the pulse in my fingers. “It was done on the roof last night. Stay away from Carver. And me.” I twist around to face Carver. “Goes for you too. It is done. Stay away f
rom him.”
The last thing this group needs is the drama from the love life I didn’t know I had, but it’s clear why I didn’t have one. I don’t need or want the drama.
Chapter Eight
Carver
It’s a tight fit on the small school bus. I almost want to tell Cooper to stop and let me out. I’ll shift and run it. But it means leaving Berkeley on the bus with her psycho case boyfriend and to hell with that. I’d have left his ass back at the factory.
The bus hits a pothole the size of the fucking country, and I have to grab on to one of the seats to keep from crushing whoever is behind me.
I find my balance and glare at Cooper. “Fucking hell, it’s not like you can’t see the whole goddamn road.”
“Dude, do you know how hard it is to try and dodge those fuckers with a bus?”
“Try harder.”
I don’t miss vehicles. Not even a little. And being stuck, crammed into a sardine can for a bus with twenty-five people for half a day isn’t helping.
Berkeley hasn’t said two words to me since the factory. I know it’s half my fault for going ice cold on her on the roof, but I couldn’t help it. She jumped right out of her skin when the door opened and there were only two explanations. It was Tristan, and she didn’t want to get caught. Or it was one of her people and she didn’t want to get caught with me.
The bus screeches to a halt and I hold on tight before searching out the window for the reason. Two massive trees lay across the road with no way around them. By the look Cooper gives when he opens the door, I’m losing faith. By the second.
I follow him out and over to the trees.
“Can we move them?”
“Probably. It’ll risk the bus, though.”
“Can we double back?”
Cooper shakes his head. “With the gas we have left as it is, we’ll be lucky to make it all the way to the gates. We double back and it guarantees we’ll be hiking up that mountain. Possibly lose people on the way.”
I drag my hand down my face. “How long do you think it’ll take?”
“I don’t know if we even have anything to hook to the bus to move the trees.”
“There’s rope and chain in the emergency kits.” Berkeley stops between us. “How long, Coop?”