by Leeah Taylor
No Ferals? Or at least some sort of life without the constant looking over our shoulders for the next attack. There’s a chance of normal.
“Berkeley?” Carver touches my arm, making me flinch. He half smiles. “I know it’s a lot to take in.”
“Just a little.”
“Come on. Cooper is making sure everyone is taken care of. Let’s get you cleaned up, fresh clothes and food.” He holds his hand out for me. “Some sleep.”
I stare at his outstretched hand and we seem to stay in the stand off forever. I’m too tired to argue with him anymore. After I’ve had some sleep, I’ll go back to being pissed at him.
What’s a few more hours?
It’s a short walk in the dark of the entrance to the Mountain before it opens up into an enormous cavern. There are tables scattered everywhere and clusters of people sitting at them. Strings of big bulb lights illuminate it all. They have power. How do they have power? Generator? Probably solar powered like ours. I’d ask, but I’m pretty sure my brain and my wolf are too damned stunned to figure out what a word is.
All eyes turn in our direction and I suddenly feel tiny and want to cower behind Carver. A prickle of heat spreads down my spine and through my body as a strange sensation rushes through me.
Carver tugs me forward. “You’ll adjust. Give it time.”
“To what?”
“All the wolves. You’ve been away from the pack a long time.”
He pulls me in the opposite direction towards an opening that branches off the massive cavern and I swear everyone is watching. New faces can’t be that rare, right? Carver said they go out in search of survivors all the time. Why am I so interesting to look at?
“Carver Moore!”
A woman’s voice booms behind us and Carver stiffens. “Shit.”
I’m met with a larger woman that has the hard stare of a mother; arms crossed like one too, as if waiting for an explanation. I’m thinking it’s about me. How dare he bring a girl home? I almost laugh, but hold it back.
Carver sighs. “Donna.”
She arches her brow. “Don’t give me that tone. Two weeks, Carver! Two! You don’t write. You don’t call.”
He’s laughing, but I’m staring. I can’t tell if she’s teasing or being serious.
“Two. What happened to oh don’t worry Donna, Coop and I will be back in five days, tops? Hmm? You’ll miss us being in your way in the kitchen in time for us to be back, Donna.”
He flashes her grin. “Did you miss us?”
“Little pain in the ass.”
“You did, didn’t you?” He holds up his hand and squeezes his fingers together. “Little bit, you missed us.”
“Maybe. Two weeks though Carver! What the hell was out there worth two weeks?”
He glances down at me and heat creeps up into my cheeks. More when Donna eyes me and her mouth slowly gapes open.
“Is this her?”
“It is.”
I glare up at him. “Is it her who?”
“You, Berkeley.” He gives me a lopsided grin. “What? You think I kept you a little secret? I didn’t. People know who you are. And the wolves definitely know who you are.”
Donna chuckles. “No way would Carver Moore walk in here hand in hand with anyone but the mate that got away.”
I yank my hand out of his and cross my arms. “The mate that got away? Really?”
“You are and you did.”
Donna gives me an encouraging smile before shifting her attention back to Carver. “Want me to bring food up?”
“Awe.” He held to his chest. “Donna, I’m touched.”
“I hate you. You know that? You and Cooper are incorrigible.”
Well, at least someone said it.
“Food would be great, but I’ll come down and get it.”
She narrows her eyes on him. “Don’t scare me like that again.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
Donna’s warm eyes land on me. “Welcome home, sweetie.”
Home? I have no idea if this is home.
“Thanks.”
Chapter Twelve
Carver
I’ve been dying for a soak in the hot springs for days. I’ll be the first to admit the best thing to happen in the apocalypse was finding this mountain. The second best thing were the pools scattered through the Mountain.
Three we know about, but I have no illusions there a lot we don’t know about the Mountain and what’s still left to discover.
One thing is clear; the Mountain was designed with a purpose.
Berkeley halts dead at the entrance to the springs cavern, but I keep walking and yank my shirt over my head. “You coming?”
“What?”
“Are you going to join me?”
“In what?”
This girl.
I look back at her. “I’d imagine you’d like to rinse the last twenty-four hours off? No?”
She searches the room with her arms crossed firmly over her chest.
“Just you and me. Most people are sleeping or back in the common area, playing cards and entertaining themselves. Trust me.” My lips curve into a grin. “Nobody is coming down here.”
She looks anywhere but at me when I step out of my jeans and my laugh echoes off the cavern walls.
“So let me get this straight.” I creep closer, swallowing up the distance between us. “You have no problem finger fucking yourself while eyeing my dick with the nerve to utter my name while doing it. Fuck me in the woods with not a care. But think twice before getting naked and in the water with me?”
She lets her arms fall and looks up at me from under her lashes. My fingers graze the hem of the too big tee and drag it up over her head. I toss it to the pile of clothes I plan to burn the first chance I get, then crouch to pull the sweat pants down. It’s the smallest space between me and a meal I’m fucking craving to devour, but I just peer up at her. More red coats her cheeks.
“Still mad at me?”
“Yes.”
“You gonna tell me why?”
“No,” she scoffs. “Figure it out.”
I’ve never met anyone with the power to make me hard and pissed all at the same time. Yet here she stands with a look I’m sure could kill. But it’s not hatred flowing from her, it’s a very different emotion washing over me. Carnal. Lustful. Down right sinful.
“Hmm.” I stand and nod. “Come on.”
“And if I don’t?”
God, she’s really trying me now. “You wanna find out?” I’m getting the impression she does, but nothing comes out of her mouth. “Come on.”
I’m one step into the perfectly hot water when she growls, and the sound vibrates through the room. My dick twitches and I’m about to show her how fucking determined I am to get her in this water. And I wasn’t even planning on fucking her in it. But if that’ll do the trick, then I’m here for it. I’m two steps on my way back to toss her over my shoulder when she finally explodes.
“Why didn’t you look for me?” Her fists meet my chest and this dance is getting old. “I may have left, but you still chose that pack over me.”
“We’re back to that?”
Her shoulders setback, and she stands way too tall for her own good. It takes an immeasurable amount of strength to keep my eyes on hers and not rake them over her curves, but my hand is twitching to reach out and cup her tits. Pinch the nipples to drive her crazy and remind her who knows every inch of her body. And how to use it against her.
“We never left that.”
“Yes, we did. On that roof. I told you then and I am telling you now; I did not choose the pack over you, you made the choice for me.”
“I didn’t make the choice for you not to look for me!”
“Yes, you did!” I roar, invading her space. “I will not argue over this. I held up my end of the agreement. I kept you safe. I came for you. I fought through hordes of fucking Ferals to get to you. Only to find the bunker empty. So I did the only other thing I could and hel
d my pack together. Survived the fucking night, Berkeley. But do not stand there holier than thou like you didn’t completely reject me—”
“I didn’t…”
“Yes, you fucking did. And I still fucking loved you despite it all. Ached down in my goddamn soul needing you.” I lean in until I’m almost nose to nose with her. “And don’t you stand there with the audacity to think I didn’t look for you. I risked my life trying to find you. The pack you are so adamantly accusing me of choosing over you, risked its life to find you. You didn’t want to be found.”
I looked for her. Endless days and nights, the entire pack searched for her. The more time passed, the more I lost hope she was even alive. If it weren’t for the pulsing brick in the pit of my soul, I’d have believed it.
“I know you didn’t want to be found because your trail just stopped. It didn’t fade. It didn’t slowly get less and less. It stopped cold. You made sure of that.” My fingers push through my hair as I stalk away from her. “But the worst of it all, I can’t find one damn reason for you to run from me. To leave me. To abandon me. Us. I took care of you, Berkeley. I loved you. I didn’t hurt you or mistreat you. I treated you like my goddamn queen.”
I have never wanted to be the reason for her tears. Or hurt. Or pain. But I deserve answers, too. I spent the last three years drowning in an ocean of what ifs.
What if she died?
What if she didn’t want me?
What if there was someone else?
Fuck.
What if there was someone else?
“Was—”
“There wasn’t.”
Did I think that in her head? Shit. I don’t want to do this with her. I’m fine with leaving the past in the past, but she’s hell bent on decimating it all before it has a chance.
“Then why, Berkeley? What aren’t you telling me?”
“I was just scared.”
“That’s not good—”
“I was pregnant and scared, Carver.”
It’s like a hammer to my chest. “What?”
“It wasn’t supposed to be three days. That was the worst-case scenario. By the end of day one, the wolves you sent with me were killed. By the end of day two I couldn’t think about you or me, or even us. It wasn’t about us anymore. All I kept thinking was three days would turn into five and then a week and by the time it set in that you weren’t coming, it would be too late. So I left. I left because it felt like the best chance I could give…”
Her voice trailed off, and she hugged to herself.
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I literally just found out, Carver. There really wasn’t time to tell you.”
“I—” I’m trying to wrap my mind around it. “What—did you…”
She shakes her head. “No, I—I miscarried three weeks later.”
All her walls drop out of nowhere and it’s a floodgate of emotions toppling over me. It’s passion and grief and an agony buried too deep. Every insecurity permeates me. All her doubts bulldoze me. I’m staring at my fierce little Spitfire and she’s never looked or felt so raw and vulnerable. For the first time in twenty-three years, Berkeley is standing in front of me, human.
Not a wolf.
Not a half-breed.
Just human.
Her bottom lip quivers and it only drives it all home harder.
I mourned you twice, Carver. Bright green eyes pin me. Once, when I chose our child over you and again when I lost it. And by the time I did, I wasn’t the mate you deserved anymore.
“Wrong.” I growl and swallow up the space in two strides. My hands slip over her cheeks. “You’re the goddamn woman I want, need, and sure as fuck crave heart and soul.”
When she goes to pull away, I’m not playing games anymore. I pick her up and go to the pool. My hands grip tight to her ass; she isn’t going anywhere now. I came down here to take care of her, and I’m still determined to do that.
“Carver…”
“It’s done.” I step down into the pool and stop to make eye contact with her. “We’ve fought, we’ve yelled, we’ve bled all of ourselves between us. And none of it will change the messy past, but we can do something about now. And I want you, Berkeley.”
She leans her forehead against mine. “Despite it all?”
“Because of it all.”
It’s as if she can’t fathom, after everything, I’d still want her. Where the hell is her head? How I felt for her never changed, not for a second. If anything, I loved her more in her absence.
“I love you, Carver.”
Three words with more power than any other and my lips are on hers before she can find a new reason to be pissed at me. And I know she’ll find them… for years to come. She breaks the kiss with a hiss and a groan as she sinks into the water.
“And I haven’t even fucked you yet.”
“Shhhh, you’re going to ruin this with your dirty mouth.”
A smile creeps up on my lips and I bury it in the crook of her neck.
“You never complained about my dirty mouth before.”
She giggles. “Well, I could start since it’s not doing nearly enough dirty—”
I’ve had enough of her sass—so has my cock—and I thrust hard, burying as deep as her pussy will take me. She gasps and the cutest squeak spills out of her.
“My dirty mouth can wait,” I rasp. “Me and my dick though, we’re starving. I need to feel you come on my cock, Berkeley. Come undone in my arms.”
“Then shut up and make me.”
Shit, I missed her.
I pin her against the stone of the pool with another thrust and kiss her hard. My wolf bleeds to the surface with its own thirsty demand.
“Better hold on baby because you aren’t getting away this time.”
Berkeley’s head falls to the side and I don’t hesitate like before. I’m not giving anything or anyone a chance to steal this from us. Fuck. That. My wolf’s fangs shift and drop and sink into the flesh of her shoulder. She bucks with a moan, legs squeezing tight around me. Nails scrape and draw blood down my back and it only fuels me to bite harder. Deeper. Make sure there’s never a chance of breaking our bond again.
Fire spikes through my veins, colliding with ice and pools in my chest. My wolf growls and my fangs shift back as I release her. I pull out, twist her around and bury deep from behind. My hand drags up her front to her throat and grips until she gasps, then whimpers, bucking back.
Pleasure floods from her and wraps around me. My hand tightens, tugging her head back into my shoulder and I fuck her slow. Dragging out every muttered curse from her depths as her pleasure mounts, blossoming in my core.
“Harder…”
I move my hand from her throat and grab a fistful of hair with a tug. She mewls, bending to me, and my wolf grunts in satisfaction. I’m back to nuzzling her neck, kissing the spot as it pulses with its own life.
“Carver,” she whines.
“Needy as ever,” I tease, slipping my fingers between her legs and pinching her clit. She jolts and grinds back on my cock. “Remind me, Berkeley.”
It’s instant, the moment I can feel her coming undone. She grips to the edge of the pool and steals the control, thrusting back and grinding just right and it’s me coming undone, burying my dick in her sinful pussy and coming with a roar.
Nothing I won’t do for her.
Give her.
Sacrifice for her.
My arms wrap around her and pull her flush to my chest, kissing the spot on her shoulder. It’s already set in and healing. I can feel it pulsing within me and now, no matter what, I’ll always feel her. Near or far, it won’t matter. It’ll pulse like a beacon.
“I love you too.”
Chapter Thirteen
Berkeley
“Oh, my god, you have an actual bed.”
I grip the towel wrapped around me and gawk at the thing. We had mattresses, small ones, but most of them went to the kids. The adults slept in sleeping bags or on cots.
“Yeah,” Carver chuckles. “I have an actual bed.”
Then I take in the… room? Does it count as a room even though it’s a cave? It looks a lot like a room that has stone walls. But there’s a couch and books piled off to the side, a table and chairs, and the bed.
“Are they all like this?”
“No, some are bigger for families. Some families share. Some are like this. Some wolves commune together with others.” He snatches up a t-shirt from the back of the couch and brings it to me. “I told you, this mountain is a network of mazes. And we haven’t even worked all the way through it.”
I can’t fathom how big that means. “Aren’t you worried about other entrances?”
Carver pulls on a pair of sweatpants and lets them hang way too low on his hips. I’m checking out the delicious V when he snaps his fingers and catches my attention.
“Eyes up here, princess, and as far as we’ve been able to explore on the outside of the Mountain the only entrance is the one we came in.”
“This place is bizarre.”
He collapses on the bed. “You’re telling me. No rhyme or reason to the way it’s designed, and it is designed. Call it magic or whatever, but this place was created with a purpose.”
I let the towel drop and now he’s watching me from the tits down as I cover it all up with his shirt.
“No, that won’t do, take it back off.”
“Nope, eyes up here, princess,” I tease, climbing into the bed.
I sink into the mattress with a groan and curl against his chest as it vibrates with a laugh. His arms wrap around me with a kiss pressed to my forehead, and it’s like coming home. Walking into the warm embrace of comforting security. Where nothing can hurt me.
“Because nothing ever will,” Carver murmurs.
All I can manage is a small smile as I sink further into the bed and him. Carver works his fingers through my hair, only dragging me down deeper to relax and give in to the sleep trying to creep in. The last bit of weight vanishes when the bond envelops all of me.
“Go to sleep, baby. You’re safe now and I’ll be right here when you wake up.”