He wasn’t rude, he just avoided me. Which I would’ve preferred rudeness. The avoidance made it feel like he didn’t care. Although I didn’t have a right to be mad about it. I screwed up pushing him away, but I did it to myself. I just didn’t see how I could fix it at this point. Even if I was expecting a healthy baby.
I walked with Luther to the rec building.
“I’ll handle this,” he told me.
“No, I’ll go with you,” I said. “It’s my fault.”
“Yeah, but you may make it worse for me,” he said, his tone clearly showing he was making a joke.
I laughed.
“Is there something funny?” I heard a familiar voice say behind me.
Chapter 3
I turned to see Daniel standing in the doorway. He was wearing a muscle shirt and shorts. His skin dark from working in the sun.
Seeing him, I wanted to tell him everything. Everything that I had kept from him. Instead I said nothing. I just let Luther do the talking.
“I made a joke,” Luther said, “trying to ease some tension.”
“Come in,” Daniel said moving for us to go into the storage area where he worked.
He shut the door.
“You guys can’t just leave like that,” he said more concerned than angry. Also, more to Luther than me. “It’s dangerous,” he added.
“It’s my fault,” I said. “Luther just volunteered to go with me. To keep me safe.”
Daniel’s eyes met mine finally. His gaze felt like a dagger piercing through my soul.
“I know. I know what you went for.”
For a second, I thought he meant the test, but I realized it was about the picture.
“I’ve told you,” he continued, “That’s not priority right now.”
“It is to her,” I said truthfully.
“Well, did you get it at least?” he asked.
I nodded suddenly feeling out of breath under his intensity. I pulled it out of my bag and placed it on his desk, as if he wouldn’t believe me by just confirming it.
“Good. At least I won’t have to hear about it anymore,” he said. “But both of you understand that this is not something that can happen again. We need you here.”
He looked between us rather than at either one of us.
“Understood,” Luther said. “Assignments?”
Before Daniel could reply, the door flew open and Holland stormed in.
“Gerald told me everything. So, what are their punishments?” He asked with a weird smile on his face.
“Holland, you could knock,” Daniel said looking annoyed.
“I could but I just couldn’t wait to see how you handled this one,” he said and landed his gaze on me. He still had an evil smirk on his face.
“I’m not discussing that right now,” Daniel said.
Holland looked at him, “I mean I could help you come up with ideas if you need. This is something I’ve been thinking about. We could use the room in the back of the rec area as a jail cell and…”
Daniel cut him off by raising his hand, “I’m not locking people up.”
“Daniel, I know you had a thing with her but face it. They wasted gas and supplies. For what?” He looked at the desk where the picture of the Brown’s was. “For a damn photograph?”
I opened my mouth to speak but Luther placed his hand on my arm stopping me.
“We got other supplies Holland. We did not waste the run.”
“I can’t believe she talked you into going with her,” Holland barked. “You’re a doctor!”
“Which is exactly why I volunteered to go with her.”
Holland ignored Luther’s comment and put his hand on the desk, leaning on it, “You have to act on this one Daniel. You can’t let this go unpunished or the rest of camp will think exactly what I think.”
“You mean what you’ve been telling them?” Daniel said, unphased by Holland. “You think I don’t know? I’m aware you tell people I’m unfit to lead because I had a brief relationship with Shelly. Your relationship with Laura seems to be warping your mind more than what I had with Shelly.”
This was news to me. I didn’t know anything was going on with Holland and Laura as I knew Laura had a thing for Daniel. I was surprised she had moved on because she seemed to have daggers out for me. But it made logical sense. She couldn’t have the leader of the group, so she shacked up with the guy who was trying to usurp power.
“That is neither here nor there,” Holland said. “You need to do something about her. She is terrible and doesn’t carry her own weight. Punish her or kick her out…”
“Enough,” Luther said, his voice booming in the room.
He was a soft-spoken man, so it caught Holland, Daniel, and me off guard.
“A real leader would find out why someone left, not just hand out punishment,” he finished.
“There is no reason that could excuse that,” Holland countered.
“Oh really? I’m a Doctor Holland but I do not have all the means I need to find out things I need to about people’s health. There are certain limitations to living on an island during a zombie apocalypse making it difficult to do basic tests.”
“What are you saying, you went on a run for Shelly’s health? You shouldn’t lie Luther, you’re no good at it.”
“It wasn’t just her health, it’s the baby’s,” he said. He immediately mouthed “sorry” at me.
“What?” Holland asked.
I however looked to Daniel; his reaction was unreadable.
“Potentially anyway. She needs to find out, we needed to get tests as I do not have means to run a proper blood or urine test like I would be able to do before all this. So, what type of leader punishes a potentially pregnant woman? Not one anyone in this camp would tolerate, I know that for a fact.”
Holland opened his mouth to speak but closed it several times before finally stating, “Well, she better be because if she’s not you need to punish her.”
He then walked back towards the door and walked out.
“I’m very sorry,” Luther said to me, “I just didn’t know how else to get him to shut up.”
“Well, at least now he feels like an asshole,” I said.
It wasn’t how I wanted to tell people, but it was never going to be with zombies running around. It was probably the only way to stop whatever Holland had planned to try and overthrow Daniel. Now that he couldn’t use me in that, he would be back to square one.
“He should always feel like an asshole,” Luther countered. “Assignments?”
This clearly caught Daniel off guard as what Luther had said was still sinking in.
“Um, I don’t have you on the chart today,” He replied.
“That’s okay, I’ll check on my son and then see if Gerald needs me for anything. I’ll leave you two to it as you have much to discuss.”
With that, he left me and Daniel alone.
Chapter 4
Daniel sat down rubbing his chin. He was incredibly quiet for a long time. I began to think he forgot I was in the room until he finally looked up at me.
“You’re pregnant?” He asked.
I shrugged, “Maybe. I mean I think so, but I can’t say for sure. That’s why I needed to go on a run to get the test. Luther wanted to help me.”
He nodded, “And it’s Adam’s, right? That’s why you pushed me away?”
The question took me by surprise, and I couldn’t help but laugh. I started laughing so hard, it had been awhile since I had laughed like that. I don’t think I had in the three months since the plague had become the main focus of our lives. It took me awhile to catch my breath.
“Sorry,” I said still trying to control my laughter.
Daniel clearly did not understand my reaction. He was wearing his confusion clearly on his face.
“Sorry,” I said again. “It is not Adam’s. If it was, it would’ve been born by now.”
“Oh,” Daniel said in understanding then. “So that night, after the typhoo
n?”
“That’s the only time it could have been if I am,” I said.
He looked at me strangely and with a bit of hurt in his eyes. “Then why the hell did you push me away?”
I sighed, “That’s more complicated.”
“Well, try to explain it” he stated, leaning his elbows on the desk in front of him.
I took a deep breath and finally sat down on the chair on the other side of his desk. I tried to gather the courage to tell him what the issue was, but I honestly didn’t know how to explain it. In all honesty, I was more than a little ashamed of everything that happened in my marriage.
I looked at him and saw his eyes blaring into me. It felt like he was already reaching into my soul. I decided to just go for it. Either he would understand, or he wouldn’t, but holding it in wasn’t doing me any favors.
“Daniel, I’ve been trying to get pregnant again for years,” I began and sighed. “I’ve had a lot of problems in that area. A lot of complications. Doctors have told me having another kid was near, if not entirely, impossible,” I stopped talking, not really wanting to say the rest.
Daniel said nothing, his brown eyes were full of compassion though as he waited for me to continue.
I took another deep breath and began again, “It was a strain on my marriage. A big one. I don’t know if Adam was mad at me for not being able to give him more kids or if I pushed him away because I felt like I was broken. And I thought if I am and something happened to the baby…” I stopped talking again.
“You thought I would give up on you?” He asked, his eyebrows getting closer together in his contemplation.
I wiped my eyes. I hadn’t even realized I had begun crying. “Yeah. I mean, the guy who took vows to stand by me didn’t so…”
“Shelly, I’m not Adam,” He said.
“I know that. Logically I know that.”
Daniel wasn’t anything like Adam. He had proved that in a lot of ways. Nothing big, at least on a level as life changing as having a baby but it was the little things. The way he talked to people was entirely different than Adam. He never acted better than anyone, even as the leader of our little group. He treated everyone equally.
I continued to speak, telling the truth of the heart of my pain, “But the pain he caused is still a part of me. It was just easier to push you away than to deal with you leaving me later.”
He sighed and got up. He walked over to me and knelt on the floor in front of me. He put his hand on my cheek and the rough skin of his thumb rubbed against my skin as he wiped away a tear. A chill ran through me as he did. I had missed his touch so much.
“I love you Shelly, I loved you from the first day we met.”
“Are you sure it wasn’t just the zombies being around that made you think you loved me?” I asked, trying to make a joke out of the seriousness.
He chuckled a bit, “No Shelly, I love you because you’re you. I would have felt that way even if there weren’t half dead things trying to eat us.”
“That’s so sweet, though I’m sure they helped you realize it faster” I said through my tears. “But I love you too.”
He wiped away another tear. I kissed his thumb.
He smiled and said, “Good, then we’re in this together. Baby, no baby, baby down the road or not. I’m not going anywhere.”
“Well you can’t,” I pointed out, “We’re on an island.”
He laughed and said “shut up” before placing his lips to mine.
I leaned my forehead against his relaxing in the peacefulness of the moment. The peace would not last, but I had to try to enjoy it when those few moments presented themselves.
I had to ask him one thing though. The one thing that had been bothering me. Despite everything that had happened in our world, I still couldn’t help but be excited at the thought there might be a baby. That was another part of why I had put off finding out. I didn’t want to lose the hope that the thought gave me. The hope got me through.
I had the hope that my sister was still out there but somedays that felt like just fantasy. There was no way of knowing. Perhaps, my cellphone would work again, and I could try to call her, but I didn’t even know if she still had hers. I didn’t know if she held onto it the way I had mine.
Still the hope for the baby seemed somewhat misplaced in all this. Maybe because I had no idea for sure if I was pregnant, but it still felt weird.
So, I asked, “If there is a baby, will it be alright? In all this?”
“Of course. Life is still strong Shell. We’re still fighting for our world.”
Chapter 5
I took the test and confirmed that I was pregnant. As awful as the world was, I still couldn’t help but be thrilled about the prospect of the life growing inside me.
Daniel and I working things out was something I felt wouldn’t happen, but I was so pleased it did. I couldn't believe I'd wasted so much time not being with him. He was the most supportive man and I was head over heels for him. Though I'm sure my emotions were heightened, I knew I was completely in love with him.
Lasa was excited about the baby. She couldn't wait to be a big sister. I was happy she felt that way. I considered her my daughter and I was often worried she didn't see me as family. But it seemed that she did in fact.
Phoebe was thrilled too. I think she was partly happy about it because it got me and Daniel back together and she no longer had to be our go between. She also seemed happy at the prospect of being an auntie.
No one in the group seemed to be bothered that Daniel didn’t punish Luther and me for the run, especially given the full situation. In fact, everyone in the group seemed to be happy for us. Not Holland or Laura of course, but the rest of the crew showed support.
Diana, who watched Brian and Lasa most of the time, was excited about the prospect of a new life added to our group. She said she couldn’t wait to help with the baby.
I knew she used to work at a daycare prior to the plague beginning based on what Daniel had told me. Apparently, that’s where she was when everything began. I didn’t know the details of what happened, but it sounded like she couldn’t save any of the kids when the attacks began. I know she didn’t speak of it. None of us spoke of what we’d been through. She seemed to carry tremendous guilt even if she masked it with her bubbly personality.
Molly, who rounded out the females in our group and had become Diana’s best friend, took to sneaking me crackers and things she thought would ease my stomach. Molly was amazing on runs. She was a sharpshooter and quick. She was also super tiny and a great climber. She was an asset to our group and commanded respect from everyone. Gerald would insist she go on runs with him. She was also as nurturing as she was tough. Her thoughtfulness was touching. She would apologize for the stale crackers she brought me, but I was touched by the effort. I would have been friends with her even if the deadly circumstances hadn’t thrown us together.
Molly was teaching the kids how to shoot as well. Diana wasn’t a fan of it, but it was necessary. We needed to be prepared for anything. I sometimes watched as Lasa wanted me to see how good she was getting.
Despite being surrounded by the plague of the island, things were going well. Life felt strangely good. Still, not being able to speak to my sister Cate was weighing on me heavily. I missed her more than ever. I didn't even think that was possible. I became obsessed with my cell phone. As if my desperation of missing her would make bars magically appear on it.
I was reluctant to talk about it, but Daniel encouraged me to share it with him. So, I did. I told him so many stories about Cate. About growing up in Ohio. About the horrible cake Cate baked for me on my 14th birthday. She was 11 and baked it on her own, insisting my mother not help. It was truly awful. But I ate every bite so she wouldn't feel bad. I drank about half a pint of milk to do it, but I still ate it.
Cate was hardheaded. Too hardheaded to be beaten by this plague. I knew she was okay. I worried of course but deep down I knew she was alright. I needed her to be.
>
After I had found out for sure that I was pregnant and given my previous complications, Luther and Daniel didn’t want me doing a lot and insisted I rest.
Though, I was allowed to go on short walks on the beach. Lasa sometimes joined me for these but not often. It was usually me, Diana, and Molly if the ladder wasn’t on a run at the time. We usually had some girl talk and a few laughs.
“I’m so excited for you,” Diana gushed. “You and Daniel make such a great couple.”
“Don’t let Laura hear you say that,” Molly joked.
“Does she still have a thing for him?” Diana asked.
“Oh yeah. Totally does,” Molly said and then added to me, “Though you have nothing to worry about. It’s clear Daniel is head over heels for you.”
I smiled even though I wasn’t worried. That petty high school mess didn’t fit into a world like ours, not in a time like ours with what we were dealing with on a daily basis.
As we walked along the beach, I noticed some dead fish floating in the water near the shore. There also appeared to be decaying flesh floating in the water. The sight of it made me want to gag. I wasn’t sure if it was because I was pregnant or if it would have had that effect on me anyway.
I pointed it out to Molly and Diana. They both had a gag reaction too.
“What do you think caused that?” I asked.
Molly shrugged, “Probably an attack near the water or something and it floated near us,” she suggested. “I’m sure it’s nothing to worry about.”
I wasn’t so sure but didn’t dwell on it for long.
After months of bed rest and only allowed the occasional walk, I begged for something to do to help. Daniel and Luther agreed but wanted to keep me on something that was not stressful. No runs and no guard duty. That left either food counts or watching the kids. Since I did not want to step in on Diana, I took the food counts.
Laura was not happy with that, since taking care of the food was her thing. She was then put on runs and guard duty. She never said anything to me directly about it but gave me dirty looks and made snide comments. I, however, couldn’t care less what she had to say.
Plague of the Dead | Book 3 | Plague of the Island Page 2