“Most people have no imagination, Lisa,” Blancard said with a mighty laugh. “Which is exactly how my men and I have gotten so rich.”
Blancard’s sailors let out a loud “Boo-yah!”
Agent Brand turned to the children. “The idea here is to take the diamonds before Simon can. No diamonds, no doomsday device. The mission is a little different than most, but all of you have been trained in underwater combat, so it shouldn’t be too difficult. Take the Ali down to the ocean floor and find the shipwreck.”
“Do you think the diamonds are really down there?” Matilda asked.
“Eyewitness reports claim the ship was too heavy to maneuver,” Ms. Holiday noted. “It’s very likely that the extra weight of the jewels led to its sinking.”
“If they are down there, use the submersible to bring them to the surface,” Blancard said. “And keep the cameras running at all times. My crew’s eyes can spot things of value that you might overlook. That’s how we make our living.”
“So where are our packs?” Duncan asked the librarian.
“Kids, everything you need for this mission is up here,” she said as she tapped her finger against her skull.
“You’ve got to be—” Duncan cried, but caught Ruby’s stern expression reminding him that he was supposed to “man up.”
“None of your abilities would do you much good underwater, anyway, bro,” Flinch said.
“Blancard will use the radio to guide you in steering the submersible, but I’m told it’s quite simple.” Ms. Holiday turned her attention to Duncan. “Just remember, you are the best secret agents the world has ever seen. Isn’t that right, Alexander?”
Mr. Brand grunted but nodded.
The captain’s men helped the children into their seats. Then the vessel was raised off the deck of the Julia Child.
“Take care of my sub!” the captain called over the radio.
The Muhammad Ali swung over the side of the ship and lowered into the water. Soon, the chains that held the little submersible aloft released and it plopped into the water with a jolt. Not that the team noticed. They were already leaping to their responsibilities. Ruby took control of the onboard computer and the radar device, which was currently tracking a school of dolphins directly below them. Matilda was in charge of the mechanical arms and immediately began throwing practice haymakers and uppercuts. Jackson was getting a feel for the sub’s harpoon gun. Flinch was in charge of cameras and spotlights. He rarely blinked and wouldn’t miss anything. It was up to Duncan to steer the submersible. He sat in the captain’s chair, watching as the waves swallowed the craft.
“So that guy was once in NERDS?” Jackson said.
“Well, he’s a total hottie now,” Matilda said.
“Gross!” Ruby cried. “He’s so old.”
“I’m just saying, if he turned out that good-looking, there might be hope for us all.”
“Fishhead was on the team from 1973 to 1983,” Ruby said. “They called him Fishhead because he was a naturally great swimmer.”
“What about his upgrades?” Duncan asked.
“He didn’t have any at first,” Ruby explained. “They had a crude computer system that suggested gadgets based on a spy’s weaknesses. But mostly they were just kids who were really good at something.”
As the other kids imagined the prehistoric days of NERDS, the submersible sank farther into the deep. There was no need for Duncan to steer. Gravity was carrying the small craft to the bottom of the ocean. Duncan drifted as well, into his own thoughts: his sister’s mean comments, his parents’ confused expressions when he spoke, his anxiety over losing his upgrades. Somehow it was all tied together; he just couldn’t undo the knot. He didn’t like being confused. It made him feel like he used to before he became a spy and his whole life changed—back when he was below average.
“What’s on your mind, muchacho? And nice threads, by the way,” Flinch said as he leaned forward.
“Thanks. Just thinking about our mission,” Duncan lied.
“Isn’t this great? It’s like that book Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea. You’re like Captain Nemo up here in the control seat. Whoa! Did you see that?”
Duncan looked out the window and saw a fin swim past the submersible. The only problem was, this fin was four times the size of the craft. “What was it?”
“How would I know?” Flinch said, his eyes as big as saucers. “The closest I’ve ever gotten to the ocean is a box of Swedish Fish.”
“It’s a whale,” Ruby said, following it on her radar screen. “It must weigh close to twenty tons.”
“That would make it a whale shark,” Duncan said. “It’s one of the biggest animals in the world and it’s native to this part of the ocean.”
“Whale shark?” Jackson cried as he swiveled the harpoon gun to prepare for attack.
“Relax, it’s harmless,” Duncan said.
The whale shark glided by once more, this time slowing to fix a massive eye on the craft. The children held their breath until the animal swam away, then craned their necks to follow its path. Swimming in its wake were thousands of tiny silver fish. They moved about in a single massive group, less like fish and more like a ribbon of gelatin trailing the whale shark. Suddenly, a school of tuna fish appeared from nowhere, darting in and out of the hitchhikers, feasting on the flickering ribbons of life. Duncan had never seen anything like it in the world.
“Do we not have the best jobs ever?” Flinch cried.
Just then, the front glass flickered and the image of Agent Brand appeared before them all. He looked rather irritated.
“What’s the problem, boss man?” Matilda asked. “You look angry.”
“Isn’t that how he always looks?” Jackson mumbled.
“I’m fine, Wheezer,” Brand said, though his irritated voice said otherwise.
“We haven’t found anything yet, sir,” Ruby said.
“It will take you a half an hour to make it to the spot we believe the Bom Jesus settled. I was just letting you know our sonar scans have shown that there is indeed something below you.”
“Where’s Ms. Holiday?” Duncan asked.
“Ms. Holiday is busy speaking with Captain Blancard,” Brand snarled.
“Oooooh,” said Matilda. The children shared a knowing look, which seemed to irritate the agent even more. A moment later his image vanished from the glass.
“That poor dumb moron,” Matilda said. “He’ll lose her if he doesn’t learn to talk.”
“Ms. Holiday is the bomb,” Jackson added.
After some time, Ruby alerted them that they were quickly approaching the ocean floor. Flinch flipped on the external lights and Duncan switched on the motor. He could feel the vibration of pumping engines through his body as the Ali suddenly responded to the tiniest movement of the controls. He gripped the throttle and soon the little submersible was propelled forward through the water, just above the seabed.
“See anything out there, Flinch?” Matilda asked. “Rather, see anything I can punch in the face?”
Flinch grinned. “Nothing yet, but you’ll be the first to know. Wait! There’s something!”
Duncan brought the craft to a halt. “I don’t see a thing.”
“There,” Flinch said, pointing out the window at a green mass on the sandy floor.
“Congrats, you spotted some algae,” Jackson said. “Good job, eagle eye.”
Flinch laughed. “That’s not algae. Well, it is, but what’s underneath it isn’t algae. That’s an anchor.”
Ruby’s terminal was beeping wildly. “He’s right. This computer photographs objects and then allows me to digitally remove surface materials that may have collected on them. That’s an anchor all right.”
“Then the Bom Jesus must be around here somewhere,” Matilda said.
Duncan piloted the ship along the sandy floor. Soon they came across some ancient barrels and what looked like a rudder. It wasn’t long before they saw the stern of the ship. That’s when Matilda
let out another little cry.
Duncan tapped the radio. “Agent Brand. Agent Holiday. The Muhammad Ali has found the Bom Jesus.”
Holiday’s face appeared on the screen. “Amazing! Perhaps all of you will become treasure hunters one day like Captain Blancard here. Any sign of our diamonds?”
Ruby shrugged. “Nothing yet. We’re going to have to get closer.”
Duncan steered them closer to the ancient ship. Flinch spotted a huge hole in the hull. From the look of the wreck, the Bom Jesus had sunk on its side. Duncan piloted the submersible closer, spotting several cannons poking out of windows and a massive hole on one side of the ship. Duncan couldn’t be sure, but it looked as if one of the cannons had exploded, causing the hole and possibly sending the ship down beneath the waves. The hole was just big enough for the Muhammad Ali to enter, but the moment Duncan tried, a great white shark charged out of the ship at them, snapping its jaws and causing the children to scream. When the beast found nothing to eat, it circled around, then got bored and slipped away.
Duncan eased the submersible into the ancient ship and Flinch directed the high-powered lights. Inside, nearly everything was covered in a green sludge. Little crabs scurried into crevices and a few striped fish darted away. It was both beautiful and ghostly.
“There’s one of the cannons,” Flinch said as Duncan steered the ship around the hull. The ancient iron gun sat among little barrels with XXX painted on them.
“Matilda, I think we’re going to need those arms,” Duncan said. “If the diamonds are here, they’re in the bottom of the boat. Pull up the floorboards, but steer clear of those barrels. I suspect they’re full of gunpowder.”
Matilda grinned as she slipped her hands into two rubber gloves. Suddenly the arms on either side of the craft came to life. Matilda tore into the bottom of the boat, causing algae, plankton, and sand to swirl around the sub.
“I’ve broken through,” Matilda said.
They waited for the swirling fog to settle, only to find the mechanical arms had ripped a hole into a small room. Inside were tables and chairs and two bone-white skeletons that floated up and hit the submersible window. Ruby shrieked but Jackson and Flinch laughed.
“That was awesome!” Flinch cried.
“Look!” Duncan cried.
Scattered about the room were wooden chests with brass padlocks.
The NERDS cheered. It looked as if they had found the diamonds.
Captain Blancard’s face reappeared in the glass. “Very good, my friends. Now, Gluestick, there is a button just above your right knee that says TRUNK. Do you see it? Push that button.”
Duncan pushed the button and watched as a portion of the submersible rolled out from underneath the craft. Its lid opened, revealing a large storage space.
“OK, Wheezer, let’s get one of those chests into the submersible and opened. No point bringing them all up if all we’re going to find is some old clothes,” Blancard said. “But be gentle. Those chests are hundreds of years old.
Duncan watched as Matilda manipulated the arms until one of the chests was inside the trunk of the sub. Duncan pressed the button again and the trunk retracted, sealing itself tight. Now Jackson hurried to open a trapdoor in the floor of the craft. In a pool of water below them was the chest. After some fiddling with the ancient padlock, Jackson managed to pry the lid open. Inside was one of the biggest diamonds any of them had ever seen.
“The Azreal Cache!” Jackson cried.
“Also known as my early retirement!” Blancard exclaimed. Duncan could hear his men cheering in the background.
Brand reappeared. “OK, team. Let’s grab all the chests and get them to the surface on the double. You should be very proud of yourselves. You stopped Simon’s plan before it even got started!”
Suddenly, there was a tremendous jolt to the sub and the children were knocked about. Duncan slammed his head into the window.
“What was that?” Matilda said.
Jackson crawled into his harpoon gun chair and swiveled about. “Uh-oh,” he said.
Duncan spun the Ali around and came nose-to-nose with a second submersible. He could see Simon, Albert Nesbitt, an overgrown man with a hook for a hand, an older woman, and two-dozen squirrels inside.
“He’s hailing us,” Ruby said. She snarled and flipped a switch.
“Hello, old friends,” Simon’s voice said. It was filled with rage and bitterness.
“Too late, Heathcliff. The diamonds are ours,” Matilda taunted.
“My name is Simon!” the boy bellowed so loudly it shook Duncan’s eardrums. “I knew you fools would lead me to the Azreal diamonds. To be completely honest, we had no idea where they were, but considering Mr. Brand’s proactive style, I knew you fools would go hunting for them first and we could just follow you. Now get out of my way.”
“Not this time,” Flinch said. “If you want them, you’re going to have to take them.”
“Not a problem,” Simon said. “My associate can handle that.”
Simon’s goon slipped into a set of gloves identical to Matilda’s, and suddenly the mechanical arms on Simon’s craft came to life. With one punch, the Muhammad Ali was thrown backward and crashed through the side of the Bom Jesus. Everyone inside the craft was jostled about like popping corn.
“What’s going on down there?” Agent Brand cried; his face appeared in the glass again.
“Simon is here and he’s after the diamonds,” Ruby replied.
“Matilda, time to put your gloves on,” Jackson said.
“My pleasure!” Matilda said. Soon she was swinging back at Simon’s ship, which had followed theirs out the side of the Bom Jesus. The mechanical fist glanced off of Simon’s sub, but the force was enough to knock it off balance.
Once Simon’s sub had righted itself, the two submersibles traded punches. One devastating blow after another knocked the little ships around at the bottom of the sea.
“I’ve got a question,” Ruby said. “I know the ship can handle a lot of pressure, but can it take a sucker punch from an identical submersible?” Another punch answered her question. It glanced off the side of the window, leaving a tiny, hairline crack.
“OK, that’s bad,” Flinch said to Duncan. “How about you get us out of here, buddy?”
Duncan gunned the engines to move the craft backward. But suddenly, a massive explosion from inside the Bom Jesus caused the submersible to fly forward, its instruments spinning and buzzing.
“What was that?” Jackson cried.
“Must be some of that gunpowder,” Matilda said.
“That’s not possible,” Ruby cried. “This ship sank more than two hundred years ago. Any gunpowder they had on board could never have survived this long underwater.”
There was another explosion, and the tiny craft was knocked about again.
“Tell that to the gunpowder,” Flinch said. “I think all this fighting around it is setting it off. We need to get the diamonds and get out of here fast.”
“The ship’s steering is out of whack!” Duncan cried as Simon’s sub closed in.
“Got any ideas, gadget boy?” Jackson shouted to Duncan.
Duncan was at a loss. If he had his abilities, he could shoot a spray of glue into Simon’s engines and gunk up the works. But he didn’t have any abilities. He was just a kid now. A normal kid who was beginning to have a panic attack. He felt fevered and flushed. Air in the craft seemed harder to come by, and then, suddenly, he knew what to do.
“Hang on,” Duncan said. “And hold your breath. I’m venting the compressed oxygen into the ballast tank. It’ll push the water out and we will rise fast. I just hope we have enough oxygen to breathe until we get to the surface.”
Duncan pushed a button and a red warning light flashed on the controls. A mighty flow of bubbles fired out of the back of the Muhammad Ali. It began to rise higher and higher toward the surface, leaving Simon and his gang below.
“Where are we going?” Matilda complained. “I’m not do
ne with him yet!”
“I have no idea how many punches this craft can take, and I think we’ve had one too many, Wheezer,” Duncan said, pointing to the crack in the window. It had grown considerably.
“But what about the rest of the diamonds!” cried Jackson. “Simon will get them.”
“Yeah, we can’t leave now!” shouted Finch.
“The sub is broken,” said Duncan. “There’s nothing I can do.”
“See ya, NERDS,” Simon’s voice cackled over the speakers as the submersible rose higher and higher. “Thanks for leaving all these diamonds for me. It’s just so convenient that I can predict your moves at every turn.”
Brand’s face appeared in the glass. “We’ve been monitoring the situation from above. We’ll pick you up on the surface,” he said tersely.
Duncan felt his face light up with embarrassment. It was clear Brand was disappointed in them.
“Does someone need a lift?” Blancard’s friendly voice said over the communications system a few minutes later, as they bobbed to the surface near the S.S. Julia Child.
Duncan tried to smile, but all he could think of was Agent Brand’s disappointed face.
NICE TO SEE THAT YOU DID
NOT BURN THE HOUSE DOWN.
REALLY. I WAS WORRIED.
ALL RIGHT, NOW LET’S DO
SOME MORE CODE MAKING. YOU MAY
FIND THIS TEDIOUS, BUT THE TRUTH
IS YOU’RE REALLY GOING TO NEED
THIS STUFF WHEN THEY SEND YOU OUT
IN THE FIELD. CODES ARE, LIKE,
A REALLY BIG DEAL. NOW LET’S BUILD
ON WHAT WE LEARNED WITH THE
SUBSTITUTION CIPHER, BUT INSTEAD
OF SUBSTITUTING ONE LETTER FOR
ANOTHER, ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS
HAVE A CAREFUL EYE.
THIS METHOD WAS CREATED
BY A GUY NAMED FRANCIS BACON,
AND IT’S
SIMPLE—WRITE YOUR SECRET
MESSAGE INSIDE A SECRET MESSAGE.
I CAN SEE THE CONFUSED LOOK
ON YOUR FACE AND NOW REALIZE
THERE IS A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN
M Is for Mama's Boy Page 11