by Leanne Banks
She made herself smile. “Have a good time,” she said, feeling the sparkle inside her fizzle.
Three
Mason Chandler stopped Jack outside the conference room after his afternoon meeting. “Got a minute?”
“Sure. My office?”
Mason nodded, and they walked down the hall. A successful businessman in his own right, Mason had long moved in the same social circle as the Fortune family. Soon he would be joining their ranks as Jack’s cousin Chloe’s husband. Even though he owned his own company, he was well trusted by the Fortune family.
“Hold my calls, Elaine,” Jack said to his replacement assistant, then joined Mason in his office. “What’s up?”
“Chloe told me your father’s been acting edgy lately,” Mason said.
Jack frowned.
“Will you keep me posted if you see or hear anything out of the ordinary? Anything at all.”
Jack shrugged. “I can’t think of anything offhand,” he said. “Unless—It’s nothing.”
“You’d be surprised what can come from nothing,” Mason said in a dark tone.
“Amanda told me Mollie Shaw was hanging around Stuart’s office. When Amanda asked her about it, she got nervous. It’s probably nothing,” he said. “Mollie’s barely over drinking age.”
“Maybe a background check,” Mason murmured.
“For a wedding planner?” Jack asked in disbelief. “Are we stepping into paranoia? Besides, she’s good friends with your future brother-in-law’s wife, Kelly.”
“You may be right,” Mason said in a noncommittal voice. “But there is such a thing as healthy paranoia. Keep your eyes open. Okay?”
“Always,” Jack said. “How do you get all your information, anyway?”
“I have my sources.” Mason headed for the door and turned around. “How’s Lilly?”
“Better since Amanda took over.”
“That’s good. You headed home now?”
“No, I’m meeting Trina Sullivan for dinner.”
“Redhead.” Mason cracked a wicked grin. “Jack’s new WOW.”
‘“Wow’?” Jack repeated.
“Woman of the week. You don’t keep them around much longer than that.”
“I come from a long line of matchmakers,” Jack told Mason. “You know about Kate,” he said referring to his aunt who was determined to make sure all Fortunes were happily married and producing more heirs. “The only way to throw her off course is to be a moving target.”
“No serious contenders?”
“The only female I’m serious about is Lilly.”
Mason nodded slowly. “Safe choice. ’Night.”
After Mason left, Jack checked the mirror in his office rest room and straightened his tie. His evenings had been too quiet lately. He’d had too much time to reflect. He needed a distraction. Trina.
Every time Amanda closed her eyes that night in bed, she pictured Jack. And Trina. He would flirt with Trina and let his hand linger at her waist. He would kiss her. He would hold her.
Pain cut through her. Jealousy welled inside her. Amanda squished her eyes closed. She hated jealousy. It was such a small, useless emotion. Amanda didn’t spend much time lamenting her plain appearance. Her value had never been in the color of her eyes, the shape of her face or the shape of her slim body. She’d been valued for her mind, her common sense and for her heart.
Her mother had always said outer beauty faded, but inner beauty lasted forever. Amanda knew those qualities were important for the long run. When she thought of Jack and Trina, however, she wished for just a little more outer beauty.
She heard the front door close, and her eyes popped open. Jack was home. Her heart pounded against her rib cage. She glanced at the clock. Past midnight. Would he smell like her perfume? Would her lipstick be on his mouth and his neck? Had she teased his mind? Worse yet, she wondered, her stomach twisting, had Trina touched his heart?
Amanda had no idea how she would get through this weekend. She would have to avoid Jack as much as possible.
Late Sunday night, Amanda heard Lilly cry out. The heartrending sound jerked her awake faster than an ice-cold shower. Lilly cried out again, and Amanda tossed back her covers and rushed down the hall to the little girl’s room.
Nightmare. Amanda watched Lilly toss and turn with her eyes still closed. She gently awakened her. “You’re dreaming, Lilly.”
“Mommy—” Lilly’s eyes blinked open and she began to sob. “I want my mommy.”
Her heart twisting at the well of grief and confusion in Lilly’s voice, Amanda took her into her arms. “Oh, sweetie. I’m so sorry.”
“I—want—” Lilly sniffed and sobbed. “I—want her to come back.”
“I know you do,” Amanda said, holding Lilly tight. She remembered her own bottomless sadness when her father had died.
“She’s not coming back, is she?”
It hurt Amanda to see Lilly in such pain, to have to be the one to kill her futile wish. “She’s not. She can’t. I’m sure she would if she could. She may not be with you the way she used to be, but you can keep her alive in your mind and heart forever.” She flicked on the bedside lamp. “Let’s look at her picture again.”
From the doorway, Jack watched in wonder as Amanda comforted Lilly. It was as if she knew exactly what to do. There was a depth to Amanda he’d clearly never appreciated. She said the things about his former wife he never would have thought to say because of his bitterness toward her.
Amanda’s generosity touched a secret place inside him, and he felt something inside him shift. Moved, he drank in the scene. Amanda wore a white cotton nightgown. Her hair tousled, her face stripped of makeup, she shouldn’t have been sexy to him. He found himself noticing her bare legs and wanting her softness.
Delilah distracted him by weaving around his legs, then prissing into Lilly’s room.
“Look who came to see you,” Amanda said. “She can’t stand being left out of any girl talk.”
“Can she stay?” Lilly asked.
“I don’t know if your daddy—”
“Daddy says it’s fine,” Jack said, moving into the room. “You okay, princess?”
Lilly’s brave nod made his chest tighten. He reached down to kiss her and ruffle her hair. “I don’t know how I got the very best daughter in the world. I guess I just got lucky.”
She slipped her hands around his neck and squeezed him.
“It’ll be better in the morning,” he told her. “Get some rest.”
Amanda turned off the light and followed him out of the room.
“Thank you,” he said after she closed the door.
“For what?” she asked.
“For helping her.”
“When I heard her cry, I couldn’t have done anything else. It was like someone had grabbed my heart and smashed it.”
Jack nodded. “Yes, but you knew what to do.”
Amanda heard a trace of longing in his tone. “Hugs help a lot.”
He sighed. “At the office I never second-guess myself. I know what to do. But with Lilly,” he said, shaking his head.
“That will change,” Amanda assured him, too aware of his presence in the darkened hallway. She tried not to be aware of his muscular bare chest and thin sleep trousers. “You’ve been training for Fortune Corporation your entire life. Being a daddy takes a different kind of practice.”
He turned to her outside her room. “I didn’t see much of you this weekend. Why?”
Amanda’s stomach dipped. “I thought it might be best if Lilly had a little more time alone with you, so I made myself scarce,” she said, and prayed she wouldn’t be struck by lightning for telling a half-truth.
He moved closer, his gaze holding hers intently. “We missed you.”
Her heart rate kicked up. Although he’d said we, he’d meant Lilly, she told herself. “Lilly has gotten used to me being around. She’ll get used to you, too.”
“I’ve gotten used to you being around,” he mut
tered as if he weren’t entirely pleased. He lifted his hand to her jaw. “You’re more than I thought you were.”
Amanda could barely breathe, let alone say a word.
“How did you hide it from me?”
She took a shallow breath and inhaled his masculine scent. “I was supposed to be invisible,” she whispered. “That’s what you needed from me.”
“You know more about me than I know about you. Not fair.” He narrowed his green eyes slightly. “Are you sure you didn’t fool me into believing you were invisible?”
“I did not fool you,” she said, full voice. “You were too busy wor—” She broke off, unwilling to go there. “You just didn’t see me.”
He wove his finger through a strand of her hair. “I was too busy doing what?”
Amanda truly didn’t want to discuss this. In fact, she wouldn’t mind being invisible again for the rest of this conversation. She closed her eyes. “You were too busy being perfect at work and recovering from your—”
“Failure,” he said in a harsh voice.
“Disappointments,” she corrected and opened her eyes. “Everyone has disappointments.”
His nostrils flared as he took in a sharp breath. She could tell he didn’t totally accept her version.
His scent and nearness made her bold. “You’re the kind of man who likes to believe that if you try hard enough you can make anything happen.”
“I can,” he said with confidence, not arrogance.
“But you can’t always control everyone else’s actions.”
“You know too much about me, and I don’t know near enough about you,” he told her, then lowered his head.
His mouth took hers, and her heart stopped. Unable to close her eyes, her vision blurred. She almost couldn’t believe he was kissing her. His lips were supple and persuasive like his voice.
It took a full moment of him brushing his mouth back and forth against hers before she could unlock. Amanda let out the breath she’d been holding, and Jack deepened the kiss. He leaned closer so that his hard chest skimmed her breasts.
He gently, seductively squeezed her jaw, coaxing her to open her mouth as he explored her with his tongue. Amanda felt as if he were teasing her secret emotions from her. She was dizzy from the scent and taste of him.
Here was the man she had been in love with for four years, and he was kissing her like he wanted her. The knowledge made her light-headed. She slid her arms to his shoulders to steady herself, and he stepped between her legs, all the while leading her in a dance of pleasure with his mouth.
He slipped his hand down her throat inside the loose collar of her cotton nightgown. Amanda didn’t think to stop him when he cupped her breast. She had ached for his touch so long. She couldn’t believe how right it felt to be in his arms.
His thumb played over the turgid tip of her nipple, and desire, swift and shockingly intense, rushed through her. She strained against him.
Jack groaned in approval and slid his other hand down to press her hips against his. Hard with desire, he rubbed against her. He made her feel sexy. She wanted his bare chest against hers. She wanted more.
His hand traveled beneath her gown, and when he found her naked bottom, he groaned again. He cupped her, then moved his hands between her legs. Her breath hitched when he touched her intimately.
She sucked his tongue deeply into her mouth. He thrust his finger inside her and she jerked.
“So warm, tight, soft,” he muttered, moving her hand to his hard shaft.
The contrast of his silk trousers against his full hardness turned her to liquid. She caressed him while he devoured her mouth. He wanted her. She could feel it in his kiss, in the way he held her. He made her want to give him everything. She couldn’t fathom holding anything back from him.
“Oh, Amanda...” He took her mouth again, then pulled back and swore under his breath.
He stared at her with an expression of sexy disbelief. He rubbed his thumb over her tender lips and eased away from her. Shaking his head, he rubbed his hand over his face. “I don’t know what to say. You’ve surprised me. I didn’t expect—”
“Neither did I,” she quickly said, unsure whether or not he was pleased with the surprise. Not meeting his gaze, she glanced down. She wasn’t sure she wanted him to see how aroused she still was. “It’s okay,” she added.
She heard him sigh. “Okay,” he said, and briefly squeezed her arm. “You better get some sleep. Lilly will be up early.”
Amanda nodded and blindly turned toward her doorway. Jack’s voice stopped her.
“Are you sure you’re okay?”
“Of course,” she managed to say, walking into her room. “Good night.”
As soon as she closed her door behind her, she exhaled and slumped against it. Her head was spinning, her body was hot. Stiffening her shaky knees, she crossed the room to push open her window and drink in the cool night air. She saw a hundred stars and knew she’d made a wish on each of them that someday Jack Fortune would notice her—that someday Jack Fortune would want her—that someday Jack Fortune might love her.
Amanda’s chest swelled with hope. She closed her eyes and hugged herself. Could it be true? she wondered. Was this the beginning? At long, long last, would her wishes finally come true?
Early the following morning, Amanda opened her door to a quiet knock. “I’d like to talk with you in the study before I leave,” Jack said. “Five minutes?”
She blinked the sleep from her eyes. He sounded urgent. “Sure. I just need to get dressed.”
Hurriedly putting on shorts and a tank top, then throwing cold water on her face, rinsing her mouth with mouthwash, then brushing her hair, she met him in the study.
Dressed in his suit, he stood facing the window, his profile serious. She felt a sliver of apprehension. “Is something wrong?”
He inhaled quickly and turned to face her. “Yes,” he said crisply. “I need to apologize for my behavior last night.”
“Oh, no,” she said, shaking her head. “You didn’t do—”
“I took advantage of your presence in my home.”
“Not really,” Amanda said.
He cocked his head to one side. “How not really?”
She gulped, feeling her cheeks heat. “Well, in that situation last night, yes, you kissed me, but,” she said, lifting her hands, “I kissed you back. So it was two people kissing.” And much more, she silently added. “I didn’t try to stop you,” she blurted out
“Perhaps you should have,” Jack said.
Amanda took his words like a jab in the stomach.
“You’re the best assistant I’ve ever had. We have a business relationship, and I’m not going to jeopardize it for some moment of temporary insanity.”
Temporary insanity. Amanda felt her newfound hope shatter like glass.
“It was wrong. It shouldn’t have happened,” he said, his face grim. “I assure you it won’t happen again.”
If she’d had no pride, she would have asked him if kissing her had been such a terrible experience. Feeling cut up on the inside, she lifted her chin. “You’re right. It won’t happen again.”
Jack nodded. “Good. I’m glad we got that settled. I’m going into the office early today, and I’ll probably be late coming home. Don’t wait supper for me.” He extended his hand to her.
Amanda. remembered, just last night, when he’d used that same hand to caress her. Slowly she took his hand and shook it. “I’ll tell Lilly,” she said, and released his hand.
She watched him leave the room and heard him close the door to the garage behind him. As soon as she saw his car in the driveway, she burst into tears. She felt embarrassed, humiliated and just plain hurt.
For Pete’s sake, he’d apologized for kissing her. Amanda knew she wasn’t the sexiest woman in Minneapolis, but had it really been that bad?
It hadn’t been for her, a voice inside her whispered. Being in Jack’s arms had felt so right.
She closed her
eyes at her overwhelming feelings. It had obviously been wrong. It was a dream, just a silly dream, she thought. A hard knot of disappointment formed in her throat.
She’d finally gotten Jack to see her. He’d even kissed her. But he didn’t want her. Oh, how that hurt. She couldn’t do a thing, however, to change the truth.
Time to give up the dream.
The realization cut deep. The pain made her sink down into a chair. Even though he hadn’t realized it, she’d cared deeply for Jack for such a long time. Working for him all day and worrying about him in the weeks when she’d feared he’d work himself to death after his marriage fell apart, caring intensely for his happiness, had filled her mind and heart. He was such a strong, amazing man that it had been easy to allow him to occupy her mind.
Time to give up the dream.
Amanda fought it, but she knew it was true. She hadn’t felt this empty since her mother’s death.
“What a jerk,” Carol said, pushing her brown bob behind her ear. “Did you tell him to eat bird dookey and die?”
Amanda stirred her coffee and chuckled despite the pain she still felt. She’d brought Lilly in to visit her father, and the two women were grabbing a lunch at a nearby coffee shop. “I confess that didn’t cross my mind.”
“Well, you’re going to quit, aren’t you?”
Amanda’s stomach clenched. “I considered it for about a minute, but I couldn’t leave Lilly right now. She’s too fragile. She’s been through too many changes.”
“It’s going to be hard to be around Jack all the time, especially now.”
“Maybe,” she conceded, “but it wouldn’t be right for me to leave.” She took a sip of her coffee. “I’m going to make some changes, though. I’ve been thinking about it for the past few days since Monday’s conversation. It’s time.”
Carol perked up. “A makeover? That would be fun. I know this terrific salon that—”