by Anne Rice
" 'Are those your bones, my Lord?' I asked Marduk.
" 'No,' he said, 'and I only vaguely remember when they were put there. The spirit of that young one was weak, and I vanquished it and continued my reign. Perhaps it invigorated me that I was to be replaced? I don't know, Azriel! Remember, those are the wisest words I have for you. I don't know. Now they mean to put you in my place, that much we both know.'
" 'What do you want, Lord?' I asked Marduk.
" 'For you not to be hurt, Azriel,' he said. 'But do you want to become what I am? Do you want your bones encased three hundred years in that! Until it then crumbles and another young man must be lured for the sacrifice? But let me get to your point.' He leaned towards me.
" 'I forget how large your heart is, Azriel. You ask for my sake. I can tell you this, I can come and go as I wish. I banished the last replacement with a wave of my arm, and back into the fog he went. For a mortal man to be murdered in this fancy way does not necessarily make him either a god or a strong spirit.' He shrugged. 'Think of yourself and yourself only. What I am is...is what you know.' Then the sadness of his face shocked me. 'I don't want you to die!' he whispered.
"The High Priest could stand this dialogue no longer. He couldn't see or hear Marduk. He was sputtering with fury. But Asenath was hearing it all and looking from me to the god with great curiosity, and Remath the sly one wouldn't give himself away, but he knew something sat in the empty chair. He knew it. He understood something of what it said also.
" 'You're speaking of a statue of gold,' my father spoke up. 'You can't make a statue of gold without my son?' he asked.
" 'The bones are the bones of the god!' declared the High Priest. This is why our city is as it is, why we need the Persian deliverer. The god is old, the bones are rotten, the statue will not stand, and there must be a new god.'
" 'But the statue in the High Sanctuary?' my father asked, which was a childish question.
" 'That can't be carried through the streets,' said the priests. That's a mere hunk of--'
" 'Metal!' said the prophet Enoch with a cruel smile.
" 'You are wasting time,' said Cyrus. 'The ceremony has to be done in the old way,' he said, looking at me. 'Explain to him, Priests, don't just stand there. Explain. And you, my brave Azriel, what does Marduk say to you?'
"It was old white-haired Asenath who spoke up, stamping the floor first with her serpent staff to let everybody know they had better shut up for her. 'The god says he will go or stay as he pleases, that the bones inside the statue do not matter to him, they are not his bones, that's what he says!' Then she looked directly at Marduk, 'Well, isn't that what you say, you miserable little god who trembles in the light of Yahweh!'
"The Priests were thoroughly confused. Were they to defend the honor of their Marduk, who wasn't even supposed to be there?
" 'Look, my boy,' said Cyrus, 'become the god. Walk in the procession. You will be delicately covered in gold, though the old formula seems somehow to be...missing?' He cast a glance at the High Priest. 'You will be alive beneath the covering. You must live long enough to hold my hand, and to raise your other hand to your subjects. And you will live the three days it will take to fight off the forces of chaos, and then return here with me to the Courtyard of Esagila, where I shall be proclaimed King by you. We shall do it faster if we can think of some way to make that acceptable.'
" 'Alive, covered with gold.' I was amazed. 'And then?'
"Asenath spoke up. 'By then the gold will have hardened and you will be dead. You will see and hear for a while, but you will die inside, and when they see that your eyes are rotting, they will take out your eyes and replace them with jeweled eyes, and the statue of Marduk will be your shroud.'
"My father put his face in his hands and then looked up. 'I never saw it done in the old way,' he said quietly. 'But my father's father saw it once, or so he said. And the poison in the gold is what will kill you. You'll die slowly as the gold penetrates, as it reaches your heart and lungs, and then...as they say, you will at last be at peace.'
" 'This,' said Asenath, 'after you have been carried the full length of the Processional Way, gold and gleaming, raising your hand, even taming your head ever so slightly as the thick coating gets harder and harder.'
" 'And for this!' said Enoch. 'We will return to Jerusalem, all of us, including those in prison, and we will have the means to build the Lord God's Temple again according to the measurement of King Solomon.'
" 'I see,' I said. 'So in the old days, it was a real man! And when the statue finally crumbles . . . '
" 'You blaspheme!' said the High Priest. 'Those are the bones of Marduk.'
"This was too much for Marduk. Invisible or not, he stood up, throwing over the chair, and with a great thrust of his left hand sent the bones swirling in all directions. They shattered and crumbled against the walls. Everyone cowered. Even I lowered my head. Cyrus did not but stared with wild, childlike eyes, and old Nabonidus put his head down on his arm as if he would go to sleep. The prophet Enoch sneered.
"Then Marduk turned to me. He looked hard at me and then at Asenath. 'I know your wiles, old woman. But tell him everything! Tell him the full truth of it all. You know the dead. What do they say to you when you call them up? Azriel, do what you want to do for your people and your tribe. I will be here afterwards as I am now, and whether you can see me then and give me strength, and whether I can see you and give you strength, no one knows. Whether I can talk to you, no one can say. Your soul will be tested by this grand procession, this right with chaos, this courtyard coronation, this torment! But this torment will not necessarily give you spiritual life. And you may fade in the mist with all the other weary and wandering dead. The dead of the whole world, regardless of gods or angels or demons or Yahweh. Do what you will as an honorable man, Azriel. For after it is done, I don't know that even I, strong as I am, will be able to find you or help you.'
"Asenath was overcome with excitement. 'I would worship you, Marduk, were you not an evil, worthless god. You're clever.'
" 'What does the god say!' demanded Cyrus.
"Enoch looked at Asenath. 'We must tell him now what will happen to him, that is all. Azriel, you resemble the statue of Marduk. Encased with gold, you will fool all of your friends. No one will know that you are not a god, you will seem a man of living gold, and you will feel numbness and some pain, yes, the slow pain as life ebbs, but it's not terrible. Even as you walk the Processional Way, all your people will be preparing to go out of Babylon!'
" 'Well, it's simple enough,' I said. 'Let the entire Hebrew population leave now, and I'll do it.' I felt a tightening in my throat. I knew that this was youthful stupidity and that soon horror would come on me that was damn near unbearable.
" 'Cannot be done, my son,' said Cyrus. 'We need your people and we need your prophets. We need them proclaiming Cyrus the Persian is the anointed of your god. We need all the city to roar in one voice, and I will not deceive you, I don't believe in your god, Marduk, and I don't believe that you will become a god if you do this.'
" 'Tell him all of it!' said Marduk.
" 'Not now, and that part doesn't matter,' said Asenath. 'He may say no to that, you know as well as I do.'
" 'Azriel,' Marduk said turning to me and embracing me. 'I love you. I will be with you in the procession. They are speaking the truth. They will let your people go. I can stand this mortal company no longer. Asenath, be kind to the dead whom you call so often for they are desperate to be near to life, you know. Desperate.'
" 'I know, god of the heathens,' she said. 'Will you come to me now and talk to me!'
" 'Never,' screamed the High Priest. Then he quieted down. He looked at two other priests, men I scarcely remember. It was Remath, the sly one, who spoke up. 'She is the only one who knows how to mix the gold, remember.'
"I laughed. I couldn't stop myself. I laughed.
" 'Ah, I see,' said Cyrus. 'So you turn to the Canaanite sorceress because your own wise men no
longer know the secret.'
"My laughter--unshared--finally left me in peace.
"It took great courage for me to turn to my father. He sat as one broken and finished, his eyes wet and his face still. You might have thought I was already buried.
" 'You must come too, Father, you and all my brothers.'
" 'Oh, Azriel--'
" 'No, that's the last thing I ask of you, Father. Come. When we are led down the Processional Way let me see your upturned face and the faces of my family. That is, of course, if you believe in these men and you believe in this proclamation.'
" 'Money has already changed hands,' said Cyrus. 'Messengers are already on the way to Jerusalem. Your family will be great among the tribe, and you will be remembered for your sacrifice.'
" 'Like hell, great King,' I said. 'Hebrews don't remember those who pretend to be Babylonian gods. But I'll do it. I'll do it because my father wants me to do it...and I...and I forgive him.'
"My father looked at me. His eyes said it all, his love, his broken heart. Then he looked at Enoch and Asenath and the Elders of our tribe, who had sat silent all this while, and then he said in the simplest words, 'I love you, my son.'
" 'Father, I want you to know this,' I said. There is another reason why I do this...I do it for you, for our people, for Jerusalem, and because I have talked with a god himself. But I do it for one more reason, and that is simple. I wouldn't have anyone else suffer this. I wouldn't wish it on another.'
"Surely there was vanity in my words, but no one seemed to think so. Or if they did they forgave it. The Elders rose, they had their Proclamation in their hands. All were satisfied. It was done. Cyrus the Persian was the Messiah.
" 'Tomorrow morning, the trumpets sound,' said the High Priest. 'It will be announced that Marduk has brought Cyrus to liberate us from Nabonidus! The Processional Way is already being prepared. By the time the sun is high everyone will be in the street. The boat waits in the river to take us to the garden house where you will slay the dragon Tiamat, and that, by the way, will be nothing to you. We will return the following day, with you. We will hold you, and do all we can to ease your pain.'
" 'On the third morning, in the Courtyard, you must have life enough in you to rise and to put the crown on the head of Cyrus. That is all. After that, you may stand, held straight by the gold that kills you, warmed by it, numbed by it, and you may die in it. All the rest, the reading of the poems, the Destinies, all you need do is keep your eyes fixed and open.'
" 'And if I don't make the three days?'
" 'You will. The others always did. It is after that we may have to ease your death with a little more of the gold perhaps, in your mouth. But it will be painless.'
" 'I'm sure,' I said. 'Do you know how I despise you?'
" 'I do not care,' said the High Priest. 'You're a Hebrew. You never loved me. You never loved our god.'
" 'Oh, but he does!' said Asenath, 'that is the pity! But don't fear, Azriel, your sacrifice is so great for Israel that the Lord God of Hosts will forgive you, and your flame will be joined in death with the great fire that He is.'
" 'I vow it,' said Enoch.
"I laughed contemptuously. I looked up, meaning only to look away in disdain, but I could see now that the room was thick with spirits. Like smoke they hovered all around, ghosts. I didn't know what they were or had been, their clothes were gone to such simplicity. Nothing remained except a tunic here or a robe there, sometimes there was not even a real form, only a face looking at me.
" 'What is it, son?' asked Cyrus kindly.
" 'Nothing. Only I see the lost souls and I hope that I do find rest in the fire of my god. But...it's foolish to even think of it.'
" 'Leave us now, all of you, leave the boy with us,' said Remath. 'We must groom him and dress him to be the finest Marduk who has ever been carried down the Processional Way, and you, old woman, will keep your promise, and tell us how to mix the gold and how to put the gold on him, on his skin, his hair, his clothes.'
" 'Go on, Father,' I said. 'But do let me see you tomorrow. Know that I love you. Know that I forgive you. Make of us a powerful house, Father, make of us a powerful nation.' I bent over and kissed him hard on the mouth and on both cheeks and then I looked to King Cyrus.
"After all, he had not dismissed me. But my father left, and the Priests took out old Nabonidus, who had in fact fallen asleep, and the miserable mumbling Belshazzar, who was drunk and confused and seemed ready at any moment to be murdered. I didn't care what happened to either of them. I listened to my father's steps until I couldn't hear them anymore.
"Enoch went out with the Elders, making some big fine speech then, of which I don't remember a single word, except that it sounded like a bad imitation of Samuel.
"Cyrus stared at me. His eyes spoke, they spoke respect, they spoke forgiveness for my rudeness, my lack of servility, my lack of courtesy.
" 'There are worse ways to die!' said the High Priest. 'You will be surrounded by those who worship you; as your vision dims you will see rose petals fall before you, you will see a king kneel at your feet.'
" 'We need to take him now,' said Remath.
"Cyrus beckoned for me to come to him. I stood up, went round the table and bent down to receive his embrace, and he rose with me, embracing me man to man. 'Hold my hand for those three days, my son, hold steady, and I promise you, Israel will live under me forever in peace, as long as there is Cyrus and Persia, and Yahweh will have his temple. You are braver than I am, son, and I consider myself the bravest man in the world, you know. But you are braver. Now go, and tomorrow we will begin our journey together. You have my love, you have my unbounded love, the love of a King who was a King before he came to you and will be a greater King because of you.'
" 'Thank you, My Lord,' I said. 'Be good to my people. I am a poor spokesman for my God, but he is powerful.'
" 'I honor him,' said Cyrus, 'and all the beliefs and all the gods of those I take under my protection. Good night, child. Good night.'
"He turned and his soldiers closed in around him and he walked very straight and calm out of the chamber. No one remained now but me and the priests and Asenath.
"I looked about. The dead had faded. But Marduk had come back and watched with folded arms. Marduk had sent them scurrying perhaps.
" 'Parting words for me?' I said.
" 'I'll be with you,' he said. 'I shall use all my power to be with you and ease your pain and help you. As I told you, I remember nothing of any such procession, or birth, or death. And maybe when your flame has gone into the great fire of your god, I will be here still for Babylon. If you love your people so much, maybe I can love my people a little more.'
" 'Oh, you needn't doubt him, he's a fine demon,' said Asenath.
"Marduk glared at her and disappeared.
"The old priest raised his hand as if he would strike her, and she laughed in his face.
" 'You can't do this without me, you fool,' she said. 'And you had better write down everything I tell you. You're a laugh, all of you, you pious priests of Marduk. It's a wonder any of you can even read the prayers!'
Remath came up to her.
" 'Remember your promise to me,' said Remath under his breath.
" 'In time, in the right time,' said Asenath, 'the Father has the tablet hidden where you will never find it, and when the three days are concluded, when the army has entered through all gates, and when the Hebrews are on the march, I will see that you have its contents.'
" 'What is this other tablet you speak of?' I asked. 'What part does it play?' Of course I knew where it was, where my father had hidden it in our house.
" 'A prayer for your soul, son,' she said, 'that you may see god, and of course you know I'm lying to you.' She shook her head. The mirth went out of her, even the hate. 'It's an old charm. You can choose then. You'll be dying. It's nothing to worry you now. Just a charm, such as the ancients believed, that's all, nothing else. The rest that we do here is medicine, not magic.
'
"They led me through the palace and now we broke another ancient seal and entered together a large chamber. Servants moved swiftly past us to place the tables and the lamps. I saw a great cauldron brought in. I saw a brazier for fire that would lie on the floor beneath the cauldron. I felt for the first time total fear. Fear of pain and hurt and burning.
" 'If you've lied to me about the pain, tell me the truth, it will make it easier for me.'
" 'We haven't lied to you about anything!' said the High Priest. 'You will stand in the temple of Esagila for centuries and you will receive our libations. Be our god! If you ever saw him, then be him! How did he become what he was, if it wasn't for us?'
"They brought a couch for me, and I lay down on it and shut my eyes. Who knows? Maybe I was home and dreaming. But I wasn't. They began to groom me. I lay there with my eyes closed, turned towards the wall, or towards them, and I felt their hands on me, clipping my hair and my beard, and trimming my nails to the perfect length, and when I had to, I lifted my limbs so that they could undress me and bathe me. And then it was dark. Only the fire beneath the cauldron burned.
"I could hear the old woman reciting the words in Sumerian. It was a formula, a mixture of gold and lead and other herbs and potions, some which I knew and many which only an enchantress might know, but I knew enough to know it would kill anybody.
"I also realized it had in it, this brew, the seeds that people chew to see visions, and a great deal of the potions they drink to make them have wild dreams, and I knew those intoxicants would ease my pain and blur my thoughts. 'Who knows? Maybe I'll miss my own death,' I thought.
"Remath came to me. His face was very simple and there was no meanness in him. He spoke almost sorrowfully.
" 'We won't put on the final garments until dawn,' he said. 'They are ready in the other chamber. The gold boils but it will cool, you needn't fear, it will be cool and thick when we apply it to your skin. Now, what can we bring you, lord God, Marduk, what can we bring you to make you happy tonight?'
" 'I think I want to go to sleep,' I said. 'I fear that boiling gold.'
" 'No, it will be cooled,' said Asenath. 'Remember you must live long days whilst this gold eats into you. It will be cooled. You must be a smiling god as long as you can, and then a god with his hand lifted as long as you can, and then a seeing god as long as you can.'