by Frost, E J
She snorts softly into my neck. “I think I made about fifty, starting with taking this run.”
“You gave away a pretty big chip there at the end. You don’t owe me anything.”
“You gave your . . . that name, to save my brother. Although it didn’t look like he needed saving.” She shakes her head. “Protecting it was the least I could do.” When I don’t say anything, taken aback by this unexpected show of loyalty, she asks softly. “Who . . . was he?”
“Butcher of Tje Dhos. You never heard of him?”
She shakes her head.
“Lucky you,” I say. Earth Authority splashed my name and face all over the flashes for weeks, just to make sure no one would ever believe me, if I decided to talk. Not that I ever did. Kuseros is a pretty backwater Colony, but it still gets Core System flash, so either Kez wasn’t paying attention when Earth Authority fucked me, or it’s such old news she doesn’t remember it.
“It scared her, that name. Penny doesn’t spook easy.”
“Death used to follow him. Pretty close. Sometimes quick, sometimes slow. Always ugly. You really never heard of him?”
“No.” She’s silent for a moment. Trying to remember, maybe. “How did he die?”
“He outed Tol Seng . . .”
“No one escapes from Tol Seng,” she says quietly.
“Yeah, well, there’s a first for everything. He broke out. Hid on a guard transport heading to Yrillo. Maybe he died when the transport crashed in the middle of fucking nowhere. Maybe he died afterwards when the guards went bug-nuts from lack of oxygen. There are different stories.”
“Are any of them true?”
“Probably not.”
Kez is silent for a while. As we near the top of the escalator, she says, “So that’s the only thing you think I did wrong?”
I chuckle. She’s still seeking approval. I like that. “Was there anythin’ else?”
“Everything,” she sighs. “This run’s been totally fucked. I haven’t had to fight my way out . . . in a long time. I haven’t heard a whisper about the Pack squeezing the Snatchers, or the Snatchers trying to starve out the Pack. But it must have been going on a while. I could have brought food. I usually do. If I’d just had some food to offer them, that whole mess could have been avoided. It was just . . . Penny sounded so definite when I spoke to her. She definitely had the package. Definitely would hold onto it until midnight. Definitely would give it to me for two hundred and a little grease. But she must have been lying through her fucking steel teeth the whole time. The Pack always had it, and she never negotiated with them. They’re at war.” She bumps her head against my shoulder. “Now I’m fucked with the Pack. That one who spoke for them, the white one, he won’t forget this. Fuck.”
“Anything you can do to fix it?”
“Other than turning you over to them?” She looks up at me.
“Yeah, other than that.”
She shrugs. “I don’t know. The Pack’s pretty secretive. No one knows what they want. That might be why I haven’t heard anything about this war with the Snatchers. It’s not like no one would side with the Pack, if they knew. Penny and her boys have made plenty of enemies over the years. And there are other tribes the Pack could call on. The Deep Whites on the SoBo. They’d help.”
“If it’s a turf war, they gotta show they’re strong enough to take the territory on their own. Otherwise, they’ll never hold it.”
“You’re right,” she murmurs. “Are you, uh, are you going to put me down?”
We’ve reached the top of the escalator. No sign of her bladed buddy. Looks like a clear exit and then two klicks through the Kuus streets to my ship. Can I carry her that far? My biceps are saying no. But I’m tempted to give it a try anyway. While I’m carrying her, she can’t get into any trouble.
“No,” I grunt.
She shifts in my arms and hugs my neck tight. “Thank you for carrying me this far. I can walk from here. Seriously. I’m not going to try boarding.” She gives a shaky laugh. “But I’m okay to walk.”
I lower her to the ground reluctantly. Keep my arm around her as she gets her legs under her. She does look better, although the circles around her eyes are deeper than ever. She rubs her chest like it hurts.
“You okay?”
“I’ll survive.” She rolls her neck until it pops. “Let’s get out of here.”
I glance back down the escalator. Ape’s about two-thirds of the way up. “You want to wait for him.”
She nods. “He’s only been to Kuus a few times. I don’t want him to get lost.”
“How often d’you come here?”
“Less than I used to. I had a regular run up the Valley.” She fiddles with one of her dreads. “It got too hot so I let the NoBos undercut me.”
I nod. I’ve let a few of my competitors do the same thing. Saves face rather than refusing a contract.
“I don’t think I’ll be coming back anytime soon—”
She’s interrupted by the arrival of her brother, who takes one look at her standing on her own power and tries to hand her the backpack. “Why do I have to carry everything?” he grumbles.
I intercept the bag and sling it over my shoulder. Hold my hand out for the box’s tether. “Fucking infant.”
Kez ignores his whining. “Ape, get on your board. Stay within a block of us. Seriously, this is not the night for wandering off.”
“Yeah, yeah.” Her brother pulls his board out of its harness, flicks it on and mounts up. He swoops around the empty station several times before zooming up the stairs to the street.
“I can take the box if you want,” Kez offers.
“Don’t trust me?”
She shakes her head. “No, it’s not like that.”
“You’ll move faster if you’re not dragging anything.” Although the floating box is not difficult to manage, it is one more thing to pull along while she’s already having trouble moving under her own steam. “Let’s go.”
“Okay.” She smiles at me and sets off. By the time we’re half-way up the stairs, she’s taking them two at a time. When we reach the street, she breaks into a jog.
“You sure you’re up to this?”
“I’ll slow down if I feel sick again.”
“Gut-sick?” She’s lost a decent amount of blood. I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s queasy.
“A little. Nothing like when we were in the tunnels. I thought I was going to puke all over the Snatchers’ clock.”
“That’d rust the fucker fast.”
She grins at me and we jog along in silence for a while, the glow-beads in her hair lighting the way through the quiet streets.
“How’re you doing?” I ask her once we’re past the half-way point. The spaceport’s lights are bright up ahead, but there’s still a lot of dark street between here and there.
“I’m okay.” She sounds short of breath, but her stride is solid.
We jog on for a few more meters when something in her backpack buzzes.
“Kez—”
“I heard it. Civil Patrol. We need to get off the street. Here.” She ducks into an entranceway. I follow her into what looks like a hover service center. She weaves between large pieces of machinery. Ducks down into a dark corner. She quickly assembles her viewie and taps her brother’s picture. “Ape, C.P. Get off the street.”
I pull a drop cloth off one of the machines and throw it over the box to cover the lights. Crouch down next to Kez. The light from her hair winks out. Her hand steals into mine. Her skin’s clammy.
“You wanted?” I whisper to her. She’s been awfully bold for someone wanted by the Kuus badges.
“No, but if they see us on the street this late, they’re going to want to know what we’re doing. They might search the box, which would be hard to explain. Or my backpack. Some things in there would be harder to explain. Either way, they’d probably take us in for questioning, which would mean missing the drop. Hard night for nothing.”
“Yeah.”
“Um . . . should I still call you Snow? Sorry, what was your first name?”
“Hale.” No one but the parents I barely remember has ever called me by my full name. “Call me Snow.”
She clears her throat. “Snow, if we get caught—”
“Yeah?” I can’t afford to be. Even in this backwater Colony, standard operating procedure will include a DNA check, and if they run it through any central register, it will ring most wanted bells from here to the Core System. If Civil Patrol comes into our little hideout, they won’t be walking back out.
“If they catch us, I’ll go with them,” she says. “They’ve got nothing real on me. They’ll hold me overnight maybe. You take the package to New Brunny—”
I squeeze her hand. “Something I learned over the years? It’s the rabbits that get caught. An’ what do rabbits do?”
“Hop?” she whispers.
“They run. Be patient. They’ll go by, then we move.”
“Rabbits freeze, you know.” I can hear her mischievous grin in her whisper. “Isn’t that what we’re doing?”
“Quiet, smartass.”
A search-light flicks across the windows, briefly illuminating her face. The shadows around her eyes are so deep, her face looks like a skull. I can feel her hand shaking in mine. Adrenaline crash. I wait until the searchlight passes, and the whine of the floater’s neg cells fades into the distance, before I ask, “Kez, how you doin’?”
“I’m going to sleep for a month after this is over.”
“C’mon, we’re almost there.” That’s not entirely true, but we’re over half-way now. I lead her to the entrance, scout the street. Looks clear. Time for the moment of truth.
I step out into the street. Nothing happens. No light hits me. No voice booms at me to stop. I tug the box after me, and when she’s slow to follow, Kez. She’s not up to running, not even at the pace we were going. She walks okay for a few hundred meters, then stumbles. I loop my arm around her and support her the rest of the way to the docks.
Ape is waiting for us at the spaceport entrance, leaning against the plaz barrier and twirling his float board between his left foot and hand. Cocky chimp. He hooks a thumb at the A-Eye guarding the gate. “They won’t let me in.”
“Told you, there’s a curfew.” I pass him the box’s tether to free up a hand. Keep hold of his sister while I fish Snow’s Multi out of a pocket in my fatigues. A swipe of the little fob across the A-Eye’s beady red viewie and the barrier rolls back to admit us.
“I knew I’d be glad I didn’t leave you to the rats,” Kez says weakly.
“Is that how it was? Coulda sworn it was the other way around.” I tease her to keep her distracted. Only a couple hundred meters to my ship, then she can rest.
I end up dragging her those couple hundred meters. She’s stumbling with every other step. Finally, at the Marie’s ramp, I scoop her up and carry her the rest of the way. She doesn’t protest.
I settle her into a passenger cradle. No copilot’s chair for her now. She needs to rest, not be distracted by the view. “Ape,” I say to her brother, who is struggling to stow the large box in the passenger baggage locker. There are cargo bays designed to hold containers dozens of times the size of that box just a few meters away. I don’t mention them. Let him struggle. Unfriendly little fucker. “There’s a recycler over there.” I nod at the decorative panel that covers the passenger recycler. “Your sister needs fluids.”
“Yeah, okay.”
Finally, no bullshit. Maybe he actually cares about his sister.
I linger to make sure he’s being appropriately attentive, then go and fire up the Marie’s engines.
Chapter 5
Kez misses the takeoff, and I miss her wide-eyed sense of wonder. After I clear the spaceport, I set the autopilot and watch the lights of Kuus fall away behind me. Pull a packet of chillied soyu strips out of the cold tray under my seat and chew them meditatively.
The chrono in my eye says it’s just coming up on two. I’ve been awake for twenty hours and I should be more than ready to take a cat-nap during the flight to New Brunny. But I’m not. What I mostly want to do is go and check on Kez. A quick glance at the ship’s passenger monitor shows she’s still awake, messing about with her backpack-of-many-tricks. I could help her get to sleep. Keep her company until she gets drowsy. Offer her my shoulder as a pillow.
I flick off the monitor.
Fucking her is one thing. It’s been a long time since I’ve had a woman I didn’t have to pay for and she’s more than willing. Helping her down in the tunnels was in my self-interest. I want to get paid, and that’s not going to happen unless her box is in New Brunny by five. But none of that is a reason to get tangled up with her. Getting tangled up with women ends badly. Usually for them, but also for me. Losing Marin fucking ruined me for a year. Before Marin there was Mouse, who died in our cell. She swallowed her own tongue rather than endure another rape by a prison guard she’d pissed off. I got ten life sentences added to my tally for what I did to the guards, but it didn’t bring Mouse back. Before Mouse, there was that girl on the Galaxaura, who was happy enough to hump me senseless for the three days of the flight, but once we docked, knocked me out and disappeared without even telling me her name. And so long ago I can barely remember what she looked like, there was Selly. I had less than a month with Selly before Mother Superior caught us fucking and I got shipped off to juvie.
It’s ended badly, every time.
Maybe this time will be different.
That’s Marin’s ghost thinking. Still reaching back from the grave to fuck with my head. Experience is a fine teacher, and she’s taught me to use women for the one need only they can really satisfy, and stay away from them otherwise. Getting tangled with them just leads to running gauntlets of monsters.
Like tonight.
I should drop Kez and her box and her orangutan in New Brunny and be on my way. I don’t have any flights scheduled for a couple of days, but I was offered a long hop that I turned down because I’d have to go into cryo and I fucking hate cryo. That job’s probably still open. It would get me away from Kuseros for the better part of a six. Or I could spend the next couple of days at my place by the river, getting drunk and watching star-set from my deck. Either way, I don’t have to see Kez again.
Either way seems unbearably bleak.
I could have gone to ground somewhere after I escaped Tol Seng. Somewhere too hostile for human settlement, where my only concern would have been surviving day-to-day. But Marin ruined me for that, too. She made me want to be around people again, after I’d sworn off the whole fucking species. She made me want to live, not just survive. Ninety-nine percent of humanity is a disappointment. But then there’s that one percent. That one percent like Marin. Like Kez. That one percent makes enduring the other ninety-nine percent worthwhile. That one percent makes enduring everything I’ve had to do to bury myself and live as Snow worthwhile.
Crumpling the empty bag of soyu strips so the packaging disappears in a flash of moisture, I give in, and go check on my one percent.
She’s lying in her cradle, across the row from Ape, who is already snoring, his mouth open wide enough to catch a Roystean superfly. She meets my eyes when the door snicks open. Rolls her eyes when Ape emits a particularly loud snore.
I climb into the cradle next to her. The cradles are too small for two side-by-side, no matter how friendly. I lower the plaz barrier between the cradles and Kez reaches for me. I take her hand in mine. Her hand is dirty, blood-streaked; so’s mine. I rub my thumb across her knuckles.
“Don’t you want to try to get some sleep? I’ll wake you before we hit New Brunny.”
She bites her lip. Avoids my eyes. “I think . . . I think I might have bad dreams.”
I slide my arm into her cradle, ease it around her. The contours of
the cradles make it awkward, but she settles into my embrace and I pull her as close as the cradles allow.
“Fuckin’ rats’ll give anyone bad dreams,” I say.
“Do you ever have bad dreams?”
“Yeah.” Nightly. Everything I’ve seen, everything I’ve done, what wakes me up every night? That last moment with Marin. Watching the light die out of her eyes.
“How do you get to sleep?”
“Truthfully? I have this big teddy bear. His name’s Ralph. Whenever I have bad dreams, I cuddle up with Ralph.” I’ve never had a teddy bear. Or anything to cuddle with. Last time I cuddled with a woman was on Enlyoss. Back when my face was still healing and I was laying low, I shared a crash pad with a street urchin named Joh. Fucking kid wasn’t more than thirteen. One night she climbed into bed with me, whispered something about monsters, and fell asleep against my back. I never closed my eyes all night, and left Enlyoss the next morning. Kid was in bed with the biggest monster on the planet, even though she didn’t know it.
“Can I call you Ralph?” Kez whispers, her voice thinning with exhaustion.
“Yeah.” I stroke the fine wisps of her bangs off her forehead. “Ask him nicely and Ralph will dream the bad dreams for you.”
“Will he?” Her voice thins down to a bare thread of sound.
“Yeah, he will.”
It takes her a few minutes to slide through exhaustion and blood loss into sleep, but it’s only a few minutes. I let her settle into a deep sleep before I sit up, slide my arms under her shoulders and knees, and lift her out of her cradle. She murmurs but doesn’t wake. I lie back down in my cradle, settle her on top of me, her head on my shoulder, her arms folded against my chest. I pull the flight webbing around us, fasten it over her back, and put my arms around her, enclosing her body in mine. Even if we hit some turbulence, she’s not going anywhere. Then I close my eyes, focus on her soft, warm weight against me, and let myself drift off.
If there are any bad dreams, Ralph dreams them for me.
Two hours of sleep isn’t enough, but it takes the edge off my fatigue. It restores Kez more than me. She looks bright-eyed when I wake her. I envy her the resilience of youth for a moment, then put it aside as I head up to the flight deck. I’m a long way from old.