by Zack Zombie
And I went to go ask Alex, but she was out of town at a Minecon conference.
So it was up to me, Skelly, Slimey, and Creepy to face the Wicked Witch of the Well all by ourselves.
We got together to come up with a plan, when Old Man Jenkins came by with his Zombie horse.
“What in tarnation are you kids up to now?” Old Man Jenkins asked.
“We’re going to go destroy the Wicked Witch of the Well,” I said.
Suddenly, Old Man Jenkins turned whiter than a Snow Golem at a milk convention.
“You’re going where to do what?!!!!”
“We need to destroy the Wicked Witch of the Well,” I said. Then I told him all about Herobrine and Steve and their death match.
CLAPBOOM!
“What in tarnation wuzzat?” Mr. Jenkins said, jumping out of his boots. “Well, anyway, if you’re going to destroy the Witch, then the only chance you got is to fight her during the next full blood moon. Yessir, that’s when she’s at her weakest.”
“Blood moon?!!!”
All of us just looked at each other.
“What’s a blood moon?” Slimey asked hesitantly.
“That’s when the moon turns blood red,” he said. “It gets filled with the souls of all the dead that rise up to feed on the livin’.”
“What the what?!!!!”
“I’m just kiddin’,” he said. “The blood moon is a glitch that happens during every new Minecraft update.”
“Whew!” we all said at the same time.
“So when’s the next blood moon?” Slimey asked Mr. Jenkins.
“Uh, if my memory serves me right, the next one is Thursday night, October 12th, a few hours before midnight.”
“Oh, man, that’s cutting it really close, Zombie,” Skelly said.
“Yeah. That means we need to get to the abandoned cave, climb down the well, find the Witch, destroy her without getting killed and get back just in time to help Steve, all within like three hours.”
“Yep, that’s about right,” Mr. Jenkins said.
“Mr. Jenkins, do you want to come with us to fight the Wicked Witch of the Well? You also get an honorary membership into the Dirk Craftly Fan Club for a nominal fee.”
Old Man Jenkins gave me that same strange look.
“Sorry, boys, I’m going to have to pass,” he said. “Me and that old hag have crossed paths before. If I get hit by her poison again, I don’t think I’ll make it back this time.”
Poison?
Gulp!
Me and the guys just looked at each other again.
“Zombie, are you sure we should do this? I mean, the Wicked Witch sounds really tough,” Creepy said.
“We can do it, guys! We have to! Steve is depending on us!” I said, trying to rally the troops and keep their spirits up the way I thought Dirk Craftly would.
But the truth was I was scared. Really scared.
But I had to try.
I know Steve would, no matter what the odds.
So I have to, too.
So, Wicked Witch of the Well. . .Gulp!
Get ready, ’cause here we come!
Wednesday
Today me and the guys got together at the library to do some research about the Wicked Witch of the Well.
I really wish we hadn’t, though. . .
Because everything we read made her sound scarier and scarier.
One website talked about how one time she was seen by a bunch of local villagers and mobs. And then a few days later, villagers and mobs started disappearing.
One zombie even wrote about his experience with the Wicked Witch after visiting the area surrounding the Abandoned Cave. . .
I am a photographer, I take many pictures of things, mostly villagers, mobs, caves, nature, etc. One day while driving around the area known as the Abandoned Cave, I saw a bridge, and a very large thing was on top of it. The thing looked like a giant bird with bright red eyes. So I took a picture of it. As I researched it, I found out other people had seen it too. They called it the legend of the Wicked Witch of the Well.
A few weeks went by as I wondered about that strange creature. I even saw it in my dreams. Then one night, while I was shooting pictures of a dark and scary cave, I heard something that sounded like it was circling around me, flying. I looked up and all I could see were those red, scary eyes. I ran to my car and it followed. As I got back into town, somebody had a shirt on with this creature with those red scary eyes and it totally creeped me out.
On another occasion, I was driving on the highway at night and as I looked up in the sky I saw those red, scary eyes looking at me. What was weird was that I was driving about seventy-five miles an hour and that thing was right on top of me, following my car. I pulled into a gas station to get gas and to change my underwear. As I was getting back into the car, I noticed huge scratch marks on top of my car. Then I drove home as fast as I could, hoping to never see that thing ever again.
I took two pictures of this creature, but I’m afraid to upload them because of what might happen to me. But I am uploading one to warn all the villagers and mobs around to stay as far away from this area as possible.
. . .Or the Wicked Witch will haunt you forever.
(Unfortunately, the anonymous photographer went missing shortly after he uploaded the photo below. Police are still investigating his whereabouts. If you hear something, please contact your local police station).
GULP!
After I read that, I gotta be honest. . .me and the guys almost chickened out.
Yep, we almost called the whole plan off.
But later that night, I went to go see Steve to wish him luck. And to let him know what a chicken I was.
But as I got closer to his house, I could see Steve punching that same tree over and over again.
I stood there for a while, just looking as Steve doing his best to keep us all safe.
That’s when I knew, even though I might be scared, I’ve gotta do my part and help my best friend save the world.
So, I ran home and called the guys and inspired them to go out tomorrow to battle the Witch for the sake of Steve and all of Minecraft!
Yeah, really manly. . .I know.
Dirk Craftly would be so proud.
Thursday
So we all got ready to go find the Wicked Witch of the Well.
The most important thing we needed to do was destroy the Witch before Steve battled “HIM” tonight at midnight so that hopefully he’d lose his powers.
That meant we only had a few hours to find the Witch and dispatch her once and for all.
So me and the guys finally reached the Abandoned Cave and the well, which looked scarier than usual.
It was probably because we all knew we were there to meet the Wicked Witch of the Well.
And we weren’t sure if we were even going to make it back or not.
“HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!”
“AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!”
We all yelled and just held onto each other while waiting to die.
“You guys are so easy,” we heard a voice say.
“Wha. . .? RACHEL!”
Of course, it was Rachel. It had to be Rachel. I’m gonna die, and Rachel is going to be standing over me dancing on my bones.
“Rachel, what are you doing here?” Skelly asked with his puppy dog eyes and droopy-eyed look.
“You guys don’t think you’re gonna have all the fun, do you?” Rachel said. “Plus, I got my reasons for getting rid of the Wicked Witch of the Well.”
“Really? What did she ever do to you?” Skelly asked.
Maybe it was because she felt sorry for us. Or maybe it was because she knew we were all going to die anyway. . .or maybe she just liked telling scaring stories.
. .(Yeah, that was probably it) . . .but Rachel started telling us about her history with old WWW.
“Well, the Wicked Witch of the Well’s real name is Wanda Witch Hazel,” she said. “I know because people in my family used to call her Aunt Wanda.”
“Whoa!”
“I knew you were related to the Wicked Witch, I just knew it!” I said happily. Until Rachel gave me one of her dirty looks again for interrupting her story.
“Oh. . .sorry.”
“Well, Aunt Wanda fell in love with a dashing and handsome young Wither Skeleton. But, unfortunately, the Wither Skeleton didn’t feel the same way. You see he was in love with someone else. . .my mom!”
“HAHAHAHAHAHA!”
“Really, the cackling, again?”
“Anyway, Aunt Wanda grew so jealous that she conjured up a spell to make my dad into a hideous monster so that my mom would reject him and she could have him all to herself.”
“Whoa!”
“But after she changed him, my mom’s love for my dad was so strong that it didn’t matter if he had three heads, she was going to love all of them.”
“Whoa!”
“Aunt Wanda was so enraged that she went crazy and started attacking human villagers and even Minecraft Mobs. That is until they caught her and punished her for all eternity by throwing her down this well.”
“Whoa!”
“So you see, I’m here to get my revenge for what she did to my dad. So even if I have to do it with you Noobs, nothing is going to stop me.”
That was enough for me. Plus, I didn’t even want to say no to Rachel. She might turn me into a three-headed monster or something.
And, not to mention that Rachel was the only one that brought rope so we could get down the well.
Slimey didn’t really need the rope, though.
Slimes bounce, remember?
Thursday
Later That Night...
Well, we finally made it to the bottom of the well and it was dark. . .like pitch-black dark.
We felt our way around and found an entrance to a tunnel. As we walked through the tunnel we could see some lights that led to another big cave.
We all went through the tunnel until we made it to the end, where we walked into a big cave lit with torches.
The cave was big, with a crafting table on one wall and a big empty cauldron with a brewing stand next to it standing on the other wall. And in the middle of the cave was a big pot full of what looked like mushroom stew.
“Oh, man, I’m hungry,” Slimey said.
“Don’t touch it, man, that’s probably a Mob stew full of all kinds of Creeper entrails, and ears and stuff,” Creepy said.
“Eewww, really?” Rachel said giving Creepy the ‘you are so weird’ look. Then she went over and put her hand over the pot. “This is still warm so that means the Wicked Witch is close by.”
“Wait. . .what?!!! we all said.
Suddenly, we heard a noise and we all just jumped up.
“What was that?!!! What was that?!!! What was that?!!!!” we all whispered and yelled at the same time.
“You guys need to calm down, it’s just a cat,” Rachel said.
Suddenly, a black cat walked up to us and began to hiss.
“HSSSSSS,” the cat said.
“TSSSSSS,” Creepy said back.
Creepy must’ve said something to the cat because the cat ran away quick.
“Way to go, Creepy!”
“Wuzzat?” Creepy said.
Then Rachel ran over to the wall, where there was a shelf full of different colored potions.
“This is what we need to destroy the Witch,” Rachel said as she started grabbing bottles.
“What are these for?” I asked Rachel.
“Honestly, my brewing is a bit rusty,” Rachel said. “My mom is more like a soccer Mom Witch instead of the wicked kind. She even got her mole removed with laser surgery.”
“Seriously?!!”
“Yeah, you should consider it, Zombie. From what your mom told me, your mole is getting pretty big and hairy, right?”
“Aw, man!”
“Anyway, if I remember right, this potion is for fire resistance. And that is for healing. This one is for flying. And that one is for Noobs like you. . .it’s called an Awkward Potion.”
“Ha ha, funny,” I said.
Then I saw a blue bottle with water that looked a little like the one Steve used to put the fire out at his house with when “H” torched it. I took a few to take to Steve for his battle with “HIM.”
Then I saw a couple of green potion bottles.
“What’s that?” I said as I reached for them.
“Don’t touch those,” Rachel said, slapping my hand. “I think those are the potions the Witch uses to poison mobs. . .that is, before she eats them.”
Gulp!
Then Rachel grabbed a few of the green bottles as I walked over to the guys to see how they were doing.
As I was walking toward the guys, suddenly the torches went out.
“HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!”
“What the what?!!!” we all yelled, scared out of our wits.
“Hey, that’s not funny, Rachel,” I said.
Silence.
“Rachel?. . .Rachel?. . . “Hey, stop playing, OK?”
Then the lights instantly came back on.
“AAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!”
Right in front of us was the ugliest old Witch I had ever seen, and she was huge. Like mutant huge. And she had glowing red eyes.
And she had Rachel and was covering her mouth with her big, meaty, hairy hand. She was also holding one of the green splash potion bottles in her other hand.
Me and the guys were just frozen solid in fear.
Rachel looked like she was trying to say something or trying to hurl. But the Witch’s nasty hand was covering her mouth.
Man, if she put that hand over my mouth I’d probably want to hurl too.
Then, Rachel tried to roll her eyes but since she didn’t have any I couldn’t understand what she was trying to say.
Suddenly, the Witch threw her splash potion at me and the guys and we all jumped away from it.
We crashed into the shelf with all the other potions, and the whole shelf came crashing down.
I thought we had escaped, but suddenly Skelly, Slimey and Creepy started falling to the floor one at a time.
Then I thought I was the only one who escaped, but all of a sudden, I started feeling weaker and weaker.
Finally, Rachel got her mouth free and yelled.
“Throw the potion!”
I think Rachel forgot that I didn’t pick up the green potion. And the only potion bottle I had was the water bottle.
So before I collapsed to the floor, I threw the water bottle at the Witch.
KRESH!
The water bottle hit her right in the face. But it was only water, so I knew it was useless.
I hit the floor, but not before seeing Rachel break free.
“You did it, Zombie!”
“Wha. . .?”
Then I looked over at the Witch, who looked like she had something stuck in her throat.
She finally yelled out. . .
“NOOOOOOOOO. . .I’M MELTING!”
Rachel grabbed a pink potion of healing bottle that wasn’t broken and gave some to me and the guys.
We all started feeling better.
“I’M MELTING, I’M MELTING, I’M MELTING!” the Witch yelled. “I’LL COME BACK FOR YOU!!!. . .I PROMISSRRRGGG. . .”
Then all that was left was a puddle in the middle of the floor.
“Ewww. . .Witch juice,” Slimey said.
“Man, I knew mobs aren�
��t supposed to take baths, but I didn’t know it was this bad,” I said.
“Yeah, Aunt Wanda was allergic to water. I think it’s because her father was the Ender-zombie.”
“Seriously?!!!”
Rachel just smiled at me with her usual sinister smile.
“So, since the Wicked Witch is gone does this mean Steve is safe?” Skelly asked.
“I don’t know, but we better grab the rest of the potion bottles just in case,” I said.
There were only two potions left that hadn’t broken. One potion of fire resistance and one potion of healing.
“Hey, what time is it?” I asked the guys.
“Oh, man, its fifteen minutes till midnight,” Creepy said.
“Let’s head back and see if we can help Steve,” I said.
So we ran out of the cave, and ran as fast as we could to Steve’s house.
Oh, man. . .I hope we’re not too late.
Friday
October 13th 12:15 am
We ran as fast as we could.
But I think it was too late.
As we were getting closer to Steve’s house, all we could see was a giant crater where Steve’s house used to be.
“Zombie I think we’re too late,” Creepy said, running on his little feet. . .or hands. . .or whatever those things are.
But when we got to the edge of the crater, we looked down and saw Steve on the ground and “H” hovering over him about to strike the final blow.
“STINKY!” I yelled.
CLAPBOOM!
It was enough to get Herobrine’s attention and distract him for a second before he went back to pronounce Steve his death sentence.
“And you know what, Steve?” Herobrine said. “After I destroy you, I’m going to destroy your friends too.”