“We’re not trying to escape,” I lie, trying to swallow passed the words “dangerous” and “deadly” that she used.
“Good. I think perhaps if we had brought you all to a place like this straight away, then maybe you would have been able to embrace this life easier. We brought you to The Windmill because it was secure, however in retrospect, I can see that it must have appeared scary.”
“Yes.”
“I must ask you, why do you believe we are the enemy? Why so much hostility towards us?”
“We just want to be able to go back to our normal lives; you were the ones that took us from them.”
“But it was to protect you.”
“Why were you watching us? How did you know that we were special?”
She stares at me, her gaze giving me shivers. “Doctors and concerned citizens over the years have notified us of your abilities,” she says smoothly. I know she’s lying.
“What about Will? He was a baby when he lived with his aunt; how did you know to put that awful man with him? And for that matter, why the hell didn’t anyone put a stop to him being beaten, or living on the street?”
Martha takes a deep breath. “That is a conversation for Will, one I have briefly touched on with him and will be going over properly in the next week or two. We were doing what is right for the country, which unfortunately meant that we needed to push Will to some extreme measures. He is still here today, he is fine and it has turned out for the best.”
“How can you say he’s fine? He’s completely damaged. He hasn’t ever had a home he can feel safe in. He hasn’t had friends or proper schooling. He’s probably going to have trust issues for the rest of his life, let alone whatever other problems he’ll have. How can you say he’s fine?”
“Will is young, he will survive. I noticed you spoke to your stepfather; did you get a chance to ask him many questions?” She quickly changes the subject off Will.
“I don’t care to speak to him. As far as I’m concerned my stepfather died when I was eleven.”
“I would urge you to speak to him. I’m not saying you have to forgive him, but you could at least try to understand where he is coming from. It was for the good of—”
“I get it,” I snap, already being bombarded by the questions I’m desperate to know, but never want to have to ask Frank about. I don’t want to talk to him, not ever. “Frank was around for as long as I can remember. How did you know I was having dreams of the future? What? Did I talk to someone when I was three about the weather?” I sarcastically remark.
“Like I said, there were reports.”
“From what I heard, there were tests done on us. What the hell is that about?”
Martha looks taken aback by that. “Who told you that? Was it Frank?”
I’m tempted to turn Adam in, mostly because Charlie seems to not like him at all, however I also know I might need to get more information out of him, so I leave it. “No, I overheard a conversation from a group of soldiers. I don’t know their names.”
“Well, they were misinformed. We did run tests on you all as children, but it was just to confirm that you were in fact special. They were regular doctor check-up tests and absolutely nothing to be concerned about.” I can again tell that she’s lying. What is she lying about? What kind of tests did they actually run on us?
“Why can’t we just tell our families that we’ve been recruited or something into the military? Why do they have to assume we’ve run away or are dead?”
“It is just easier this way.”
“You said that we couldn’t contact home while the mole was still out there and a threat, surely you’ve caught the mole now if you’ve stuck us in here.” I’m not sure why I bring the mole back up, perhaps because I wonder how they got around it.
“The mole was found and removed from our organization.”
“Who was it?”
“That does not matter.”
I roll my eyes, feeling sorry for whichever poor soul they’d accused of treason when they were innocent. Well, at least as innocent as one can be when working for a rogue department of the government.
“One day you’ll see the good that we do here, and realize the sacrifices you’ve made, as well as all of us, are worth it.”
“You do good here?” I snort. “Okay, what good was done when you murdered Joel in cold blood?”
“He killed your friend in cold blood. I’d rather thought you might thank me for that.”
“So you get to be the judge on who lives and who dies?”
“I won’t apologize for doing my job. Sometimes we do things that may seem to others as crass, but they are necessary for the greater good.”
“And what greater good did killing Joel serve?”
“Well, we have one less murderer in the world.”
“We still have you in the world, though. Joel accidently killed one person. How many have you killed in cold blood?”
“I will not be judged by you.” Martha leans forward menacingly. I see a vein in her forehead pop out as she glares angrily at me. She and Stan have that in common. “I have sacrificed for this country in ways you cannot imagine. I have dedicated my life to protecting these borders and I will continue to do so until the day I die.”
“I guess whatever helps you sleep at night.”
“You bitch.” Martha stands up, moving quickly in front of me, towering over me. “One day you will hold a gun, and you will make a decision to take a life. Hell, you might even do so several times. You will do what is right and what needs to be done, and I want you to remember this conversation.”
“I will never take a life,” I promise her, hating that I’ve already been part of people losing their lives back at The Core.
“You will, and I look forward to that day, you self-righteous,little—” She holds her tongue, glaring at me as she pulls herself together. I take a deep breath as she slowly steps back around the desk. After straightening her jacket, she sits down. “I have something important to discuss with you before I dismiss you.”
“Yes?” I ask when she pauses long enough that I think she isn’t going to speak anymore.
“We wish to run some tests on you, tonight.”
“Tests? What tests?”
“The doctors just wish to monitor you while you sleep. Similar to what you’ve already been through when you first arrived. They’ve adjusted the dosage and they believe this one will yield better results. I don’t want any arguments over this.”
I immediately don’t want to agree to this, mostly because it’ll mean spending the night away from Charlie. My silence angers her as she readies for me to fight her on this.
“If it makes it easier for you to agree, then I will make sure Charlie is not removed from this facility.”
“What?” My eyes widen at her threat.
“His training is not going successfully. Right now, he is progressing much slower than we anticipated, and we believe that he might be untrainable. If that is the case, then there is no reason for us to keep him here with you.”
“You can’t take him away!” I quickly stand up, panic rising inside of me.
“Like I said, I can make sure that doesn’t happen. However be aware that if you try anything that even smells of trying to escape or cause problems, then I will not hesitate to remove him from you permanently. Do I make myself clear?”
I nod, my voice still in panic mode and unable to speak.
“Good, now you will have enough time to shower and have some dinner. Then you’ll be expected to make your way to medical.” She dismisses me.
***
As I walk into the cafeteria I see Charlie pacing by the stairs. When he notices me, he rushes over and tears fall down my face as the realization sets in that he can be taken away from me at any time.
“You’re crying? What did she do to you?” he demands, his arms circling around me.
“Nothing, she didn’t do anything,” I try to reassure him, resting my head on his chest.
“Why are you crying then?”
“I missed you,” I say lamely, not sure that I want to tell him that he’s on such a short leash here.
“You’re crying because you missed me?” He lifts my chin up, looking into my blurry eyes to be sure that I’m telling the truth.
“I always miss you when you’re gone,” I truthfully say to him.
“Well, I missed you, too.” He smiles at me and then leans down to give me a kiss.
“You hungry?”
“Yeah.” I’m not.
I walk over with him to the stand of food and take a plate, wondering how I’m supposed to tell him that I won’t be able to sleep next to him tonight. I’m glad I’ll be given drugs to help me pass out, since I already know I won’t ever be able to get a full night’s sleep without Charlie next to me.
I eat dinner quickly, forcing the food down my throat. I give the others a quick overview of my talk with Martha and then break the news to Charlie that I’m expected to sleep in medical tonight. Everyone looks nervous and angry that I’m having tests run on me, but we all realize that it’s bound to continue happening.
“We need to hurry up and move this escape along. Maybe if I ask to speak to Martha then we can just get this over with,” Rose hisses.
“No, we promised ourselves we wouldn’t rush this. It needs to feel right. If you ask to see Martha and suddenly the power goes out and you disappear, then she’s going to get suspicious.”
“I’m just so sick of being here. I miss Dean.”
“I know,” I say sadly, understanding her completely. “It’ll happen soon. I just know it.” And strangely enough, I feel like my words are true. I know there is a happy ending out there for Rose and Dean.
Will and Rose tell me about the rest of training then, and how I missed out on weapons training. I instantly don’t regret having to sit through a talk with Martha.
After my shower, Charlie walks me down to medical. I’m about to say goodnight to him when he surprises me.
“I want to stay with her,” he informs Doctor Pratt.
When she looks confused by his demand,I fear that this is going to get him into trouble. “I’m sorry but it’s against the—”
“I don’t care. I’m not leaving her.” Charlie wraps his arm around me and pulls me close to him.
“Charlie it’s okay. I’ll be—”
“No. I won’t leave you. You can monitor her just the same. All that will be different is that I’ll be next to her.”
“We can’t risk you causing a blackout and—”
“If I’m not with her, then I’ll worry how she is and I’m just as likely to cause a blackout then.”
Doctor Pratt sighs heavily, but she eventually nods her head.
“Let me do the talking and, if you cause any problems, remember it’ll be your head as well as mine.” Doctor Pratt walks away and I turn on Charlie.
“What are you doing? You shouldn’t be causing problems, what if they separate us?” I worry, realizing I should have told him about Martha’s threat earlier.
“They won’t separate us. They want us together, remember?”
“It’s not worth the risk. I can survive for one night apart.”
“Well, I’m not sure I can. I hated not being with you those weeks after I got taken. I won’t go through that again.”
“Charlie…” I feel torn. On one hand, I’m grateful that he is insisting on staying because I hate the thought of being apart from him, but on the other hand, I’m scared that causing this type of trouble will force us to spend many nights apart.
“Come on, guys, hurry up before they change their minds.” Doctor Pratt ushers us over to the same room I had woken up in after Stan knocked me out. I let Pratt attach all the wires to my body before Harold walks in to check that the wires are all connected correctly. He doesn’t spare a glance at me, but I do notice a glare directed at Charlie.
“What are all the wires for?” Charlie asks Doctor Pratt, ignoring Harold.
“These ones are a way we can monitor her brain waves, the others monitor her heart rate. This bed is only a single, you’re either going to have to try to make do or you can sleep in the chair.”
“We can make a single work.” Charlie smiles at me and I smile back.
Harold snorts at his words, but when I glance at his beet red face it doesn’t appear happy. If anything, it seems like he’s trying really hard to keep something in. No doubt he wants to tell Charlie to get lost.
Once he’s satisfied with the monitor and that it’s working, he moves to inject me with a clear liquid. I wince at having to take another needle, especially when I’m given no warning. Charlie holds my free hand tightly. I stare at him, hoping to distract myself. I’m able to resist fainting and I’m surprised I don’t feel anything afterwards.
“You okay?” Doctor Pratt stares at me with concern. I see something else behind her eyes. Maybe fear or regret. I’m not sure.
“I guess. How long will it take to work?”
“We’re not really sure. Just try and go to sleep.”
“Wait, what do you mean you’re not sure? This is completely safe, right?” Charlie’s anger starts to pick up. I fear soon he’ll be getting kicked out.
Harold glares at Charlie again and then he turns his glare onto Doctor Pratt, which I assume is because she told him Charlie needed to stay in here. I don’t get why he’s so angry with Charlie, and even me. Maybe he was pissed off when we ran away? Maybe he doesn’t like sharing duties since he was the only doctor at The Windmill?
“It’s safe, Charlie. Come on, let’s just get this over with.” I take my shoes off and then pull the covers back and quickly climb into bed. It’s still too early for me to feel sleepy, but my body constantly aches from training and I know the early rest will do my limbs some good.
Charlie reluctantly climbs in with me. I turn on my side to let his arms encompass me and bring me close to his front. His warm breath touches the back of my neck and if this hadn’t been such an awkward situation with who knows how many people watching us, I might have let myself turn around and move over him. Instead, I stay where I am and try to relax. The lights are switched off and a blue haze is left around us.
I close my eyes and try to slow my breathing down.
I blink my eyes open, my vision wavering. I think this will be like the previous tests except my sight begins to clear up and I see an old man crouching down, sobbing. I step closer to him and glance around us. I’m clearly in a cemetery. Tombstones and a large grass area surround us. I feel nervous about what I’m witnessing.
I try to keep moving forward, but my feet are suddenly glued to the ground and my head starts to feel foggy. The old man turns around and faces me, so I get a glimpse of his appearance. His features are old and worn, but I can still recognize him. This old man is definitely Charlie, or at least Charlie’s father, or more likely his grandfather. His hair is white, his clothes old and knitted, and his back arched so that he can’t quite straighten it. He holds a cane in his right hand, and I notice it shakes as he uses it to stand and then tries to walk forward, turning away from me again. He stops a few steps in and glances back over his shoulder, looking straight at me. I see him more properly from this height. His eyes are sad and his lashes wet. His frown looks permanent over his features.
My head starts to pound, but I try to look over his shoulder to read the tombstone he is visiting. There must be a reason I’m seeing this. I look at the tombstone and read the name ‘Zoe’ written on it, yet the old man is blocking me from seeing more. Underneath what I assume is my name, I read ‘April 7th 19-’, but his arm is blocking the rest of that, too. April 7th is my birthday, another confirmation that what I’m seeing is my grave.
My legs are still frozen to the ground, and I’m not sure I would even move them closer if I could. I don’t want to know when I die. This must be Charlie in front of me. This is Charlie as an old man. He’s still mourning for me? Does that mean we stay togethe
r until we reach old age? Or have I died many years earlier and as an old man he is just visiting me?
Before I can even begin to wrap my head around what I’m seeing, Charlie collapses to the ground. He reaches out and grabs his chest. He is gasping for air. I scream his name, searching around us to see if anyone is there to help him, however there is no one.
I try to reach out and touch him, but my hand doesn’t find contact. It goes straight through him. My legs tremble and I drop to the ground. I see sweat appear over his forehead and soon the pain in his eyes starts to fade, and his frown turns upwards towards a smile.
“I know you’re here with me…” he whispers. I see his hand reach out to me. I try to take ahold of it, but I can’t manage to feel him. I move it so my hand is next to his, even if neither of us can feel it. I cry out his name again.
“I love you…” His eyes close then and his hand drops to his side. I watch him take his last breath and my body shakes.
Tears fall down my face. When I wipe at them I find blood is mixed in with my tears. I wipe my nose and know I’ve got a bloody nose.
Something feels wrong. I watch the image of an old Charlie get sucked away from me. It’s replaced by him getting out of a cab and entering the cemetery. Then, just as quickly that image goes and a rush of memories hit me so hard I stop breathing. I see the days before Charlie dies as an old man. I see him sitting at home, alone. I watch him making a dinner for one. I see his life as an old man until I can no longer make out any of what I’m seeing. It all blurs and the images swirl around me.
My eyes ache, trying to focus, and my head pounds, feeling like the fuzzy images are knives stabbing my brain. I feel motion sickness taking hold and I just want it to stop. My arm jolts out at the images, almost like I’m punching them, and then the images suddenly stop. It’s like I’ve grabbed hold of a memory in my hand.
I pull it towards me and this time I see a much younger Charlie, surrounded by fire. He is screaming out my name and someone is pulling him back while burning pieces of wood and debris fall from the walls and ceiling. The flames lick higher and hotter, closing in on the only exit in the room. Charlie is still clawing his way to get to a door that is completely consumed by flames and I see him break through the arms holding him back.
Taken By Choice (Taken Trilogy Book 3) Page 17