by Kitt Rose
Z settled on the edge of the bed, and I dropped into a chair by the window. Heather fussed over her son, straightening the sheets and smoothing his hair. The kid was a good sport about it all and just rolled his eyes in my direction. My lips kicked up in a lopsided smile.
Heather, Z, and Lucas talked, while Christian came to lean on the wall next to me. I tipped my head to the kid.
“So eighteen, huh?” I said. “How’s that feel?”
He shrugged, eyes on his family. “S’okay.”
“Got plans?”
Christian looked at me. “Like what?”
“College, trade school, a job? Welcome to adulthood, where it’s all bill, bills, bills…”
“Oh, yeah. I’m not sure. College is probably out.”
“Why?” I asked.
Another shrug. “Too much money. Not good enough grades.”
“What about a trade school?”
Big surprise, another shrug. “Maybe.”
The awkward and unbalanced conversation stopped when a man with thinning hair and a pot-belly walked in, a kid trailing him. The kid ran instantly ran to Z, his arms wrapping around her waist.
The man, who was obviously Ted, watched the embrace. Knowing what I did, I really didn’t fucking want his eyes on her. I stood up and moved to stand in front of Z, half-blocking his view.
“Hi, Zirah. It’s good to … see you.” Ted’s voice was cautious and apologetic. He leaned sideways, trying to see beyond me. When he took a step closer, an unhappy sound rumbled in my chest.
“You’re fine where you are.” It wasn’t a threat, but it was close.
Ted frowned. “Who’s this? Your bodyguard?”
Z’s hand landed on my arm. “This is Dennis, my boyfriend. You weren’t too nice to me the last time we saw each other, and he just wants to make sure it doesn’t happen again.”
Ted slapped a hand on the back of his neck and rubbed, glancing at his children who stared back with open curiosity.
“I stopped drinking,” Ted said suddenly, then flushed pink in embarrassment. “I don’t do that anymore. I was angry, but it was my fault and I know it. I’m sorry. My kids love you, and I … I know who you are … to Heather. I always have.”
Suddenly, Ted’s dislike of Z made sense to me. She was a threat to his family. The ticking time-bomb of a secret that could explode in their faces.
“It’s okay, Ted. We’ve got bigger fish to fry, so to speak.”
A weary-looking doctor interrupted the uncomfortable silence that descended. With long, salt and pepper hair tied up in a severe knot, she looked to be a worn-down forty.
Heather introduced us and they hustled Z down to the lab. I tagged along in case she needed me. They swabbed her cheek and explained what would happen if she proved to be a match. Apparently, it would likely be at least a month or two before Lucas would be ready for a donation. And they likely wouldn’t be harvesting bone marrow.
If Z was a match, they would take cells from her blood. The process involved a daily injection for five days. The drug they’d pump into her would increase the number of cells that made blood so on donation day, they’d just filter those the cells from her blood. That sounded a hell of a lot more pleasant than drilling into her bones.
But it was a big if. Despite having the same blood type and mother, odds were about thirty percent that Z would be a close enough match.
We followed the doctor back to Lucas’s room where she outlined his treatment, the different types of chemo, and the different phases of treatment. The only thing I really understood was that Lucas had a long, hard road ahead of him. I felt bad for the kid.
Z glanced at me, brows knitted, and I wondered what she was thinking. This was a lot to process and it wasn’t even my family.
Heather asked the doctor, “Can he travel? Can we transfer his care to another hospital?”
Confusion filled Ted’s face. “Why would we do that?”
The doctor answered Heather, ignoring Ted. “Depends on what you mean by travel.”
“We’re moving down south. As soon as we can.”
“What?” Ted’s voice rose.
“Mom threw us out today. You know I can’t stay there—not with Lucas being sick. It’s not good for any of them. Dennis offered us his house until we find something else, and they’re going to help me find a job.” Heather crossed the room and took both of Ted’s hands in hers. “It’s a fresh start for me, for us. Away from all the awfulness…”
Ted’s expression turned mulish and he tugged his hands free. “But I don’t want the kids to be so far from me. I know I’m not the best father, haven’t been, but I’m trying. I’m two-hundred days sober and I want to fix things. How can I do that if you’re there?”
“We’ll work it out. Visitation, phone calls, and all that. You know this is for the best and if you love your kids as much as you claim, you’ll find a way to be okay with it.”
Ted’s face flushed an angry red. He opened his mouth.
“Daddy,” Ash said, grabbing her father’s hand and his attention. “Please.”
Ted’s face crumpled and he nodded once before turning on his heel and stomping out the door.
I guessed it was settled. Heather and the kids were coming back with us. Which meant Zirah and I would live together. I fought a smile.
I’d intended to ask her to move in with me when all this shit calmed down. Now it was a done deal.
Z rose when the doctor started talking about discharge dates with Heather. I followed her out into the hallway.
Once the door to Lucas’s room was closed behind us, she turned to face me. “Are you absolutely sure you’re okay with all this?”
“Yes, absolutely sure. She’s your mom, they’re your family. How do you think Andy and Steve will react to it though?”
Z laughed. “They’ll be okay with it, and if we’re really lucky, Andy won’t decide to come with.” She leaned closer. “Thank you again. You didn’t have to offer your house.”
I drew closer, cupping her face in my hands. “When will you figure out I’d do anything for you?”
Rising onto her toes, she sank her fingers into my hair and tugged my mouth down to hers. It was just a soft brush of lips, but I drank in the contact—so grateful to have her back all over again.
“I guess you’ll just have to keep reminding me,” she said with a hint of seduction in her voice.
My answering chuckle, dark and deep, made her shiver. “Oh, it would be my pleasure to remind you, Miss Woods. My absolute pleasure.”
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Hope
Zirah
Friday, February 5th
I sat on the hotel bed, staring at the wall without really seeing it. Too much had happened in the last few days, and much too quickly. This morning, I’d given blood for more testing to see if I was a close enough match for stem cell donation. The first test had come back good, and so far, things looked promising.
Heather and the kids were tucked away in a room down the hall. We’d gone back to the trailer today and packed them up. Mom hasn’t been there—thank goodness for small favors. Not that she hadn’t been up in Steve’s face every chance she got, screaming and making a ruckus. But Heather hadn’t had to see her, and that was what was important.
Packing her and the kids up had been hard and liberating. If life was fair and just, I’d never have to step foot in that filthy trailer again. But, a part of me—the stupid, soft, and mushy part—worried about Mom. She wasn’t capable of taking care of herself.
Who would take care of her now? Steve would check in on her, but there would be no one to clean up her messes or pay her bills. I wondered how long it would be before the utilities cut her off. How long until she lost the trailer altogether.
Sighing, I flopped back into the bed, staring at the textured ceiling. Tomorrow, we’d start the long trip home. Lucas’s doctor had signed off on transferring him to another hospital. The insurance issues could be a nightmare, but we’
d figure it out. Being together was more important. He would need our support during this long, hard road ahead.
The hospital here was discharging Lucas on Tuesday. Dennis bought him and Heather plane tickets. On Wednesday, he’d begin the first phase of his chemotherapy at the hospital in town, where he would stay for the duration of the treatment.
Tomorrow morning, we would be driving. Christian and Dennis would be in a U-Haul with all their things. And I would travel with the rest of the kids in Dennis’s car.
The bed bounced and the scent of incense washed over me. The heat of Dennis’s body pressed into my side and I cracked open eyes I didn’t remember closing. Bone-deep weariness made my head unnaturally heavy as I turned to look up at him.
A soft smile curved his mouth and he leaned down. His hair fell in a dark curtain around me. He ran a finger down my cheek. “You doing okay?”
“Mmm. Just tired. Ready to be home. This whole trip has been so overwhelming.”
“Hell, it’s not my family and I’m overwhelmed. Everything you’re feeling is natural.”
“I know.” I rolled onto my side, propping myself onto an elbow. “I’m sorry I doubted you, sorry that I didn’t trust you. Somewhere between the word cancer and the way you dropped everything to come with me on this trip and then literally put a roof over my family’s head, I realized what was staring me in the face the whole time.”
“What was that?” he asked in a soft voice.
“That you love me almost as much as I love you.”
He snorted. “Not possible.” For a moment, that familiar old insecurity swept in, but then he continued. “Zirah, I love you beyond reason and rationale. Way beyond sense and understanding. There isn’t anything in this universe that I wouldn’t do for you. Before you, I didn’t know this kind of love was possible. Before you, I loved with reservation and distance. I was in relationships, but only just.”
His hand slipped behind my neck, warmth and pressure that nudged me closer until his breath washed over my lips. “You, and my love for you, consume me. And I wouldn’t have it any other way. Do you think you love me that much?”
My heart thudded in my throat, blood rushing through my ears at his declaration. “Yes,” I whispered back. “And then some.”
The smile that was just mine, with soft eyes and pure joy, sparked on his face. “Good.”
And then he kissed me and I forgot all about the overwhelming jumble of emotions and nerves. Just like always, his kiss erased everything from my world except him.
When he pulled back, he pressed his forehead to mine, breathing heavily. “I need to ask you something.”
The beat of my pulse accelerated at the tremble in his voice.
“We’ll be living together while your sister gets settled, but I want you to consider moving in with me, in my house, once she’s in her own place. I’ve never lived with anyone before, not a girlfriend at least, but if being without you for weeks proved anything, it’s how much I hate being away from you.”
“Seriously? You want me to move in with you? Like, live with you?”
He laughed. “That’s generally what living together means. Gabe’s looking for a new apartment, so you could sublet to him and take the money you were paying for rent and get a car.”
“Wow.” Did I want to live with Dennis? I thought about waking up next to him, every day, and it was … I smiled at him.
“Is that a yes?”
“Are you absolutely sure you can handle this”—I pointed at myself with my thumb—“twenty-four seven?”
He grabbed my thumb and pulled it to his mouth, nipping the digit. “Yes. I know we might have a few … disagreements while we’re figuring this out, but we get along really well and I have every intention of marrying you someday.”
Something kicked in my chest. Was that my heart exploding? I didn’t really care because this was… “Oh, gosh. You—”
“Yeah. But let’s try living together first. No need to rush things. We’ve got all the time in the world.”
Epilogue
Dennis
Two months later
“Are you looking forward to tonight?” I asked, brushing my lips over Zirah’s forehead.
She shivered, snuggling into my side a little tighter. “Sure.”
I pulled back and squinted down at her lackluster response. “Sure? That doesn’t sound very convincing.”
A tired sigh drifted from Z’s lips as she leaned back into the sofa. “I’m nervous, I guess. I’m about to finally meet my father, even if it is through a screen.”
“Can’t say I understand exactly, but over the years I’ve wondered about my own father. Not sure how I’d feel if I had the chance to meet him. It’s okay to be unsure. Hell, if you want to cancel, that’s okay. If you meet him and never want to see his face again, that’s fine too. There are no rules for this, Z.”
“I know.” Z moved, straddling my lap and framing my face with her hands. She swept her nose over mine and I grinned. “Thank you.”
“For what?”
She shrugged. “Everything. For being you and loving me.” Z brushed a kiss on my lips. “I’ve missed you.”
I sighed in contentment as she threaded her fingers through my hair. “I’ve missed you too. Sucks how schedules worked out for this round of treatment, but it’s over now and Lucas is doing well. That’s something to celebrate.”
“He was so sick this time,” she said with sad eyes.
“Hopefully the next round is easier.”
She made a noise in her throat that I took to mean agreement. “I was glad I could help out so much, even if it did mean we were like ships passing in the night.”
I snorted. “Nice.”
Zirah flashed me those dimples I loved to so much. I patted her leg. “Up, I want to show you something.”
Raising her eyebrows at me, she swung off my lap and let me lead her outside. After locking the door, I threaded my fingers through hers as we made our way down the stairs. Once we hit the street, I turned left, heading away from Ink’d and the business section of downtown.
Fifteen minutes passed in comfortable silence before curiosity likely overwhelmed her. Z asked, “Where are we going?”
Biting the inside of my cheek to keep from smiling, I said, “You’ll see. It’s just up this way.”
I guided her down a side street, leading away from the heart of downtown and toward a residential neighborhood. The houses were close together with deeply sloping front yards. Most of the houses were brick or stone with wide porches and manicured lawns. None of the homes were large, two or three bedrooms. This was a neighborhood filled with young families and the laughter of children rang through the street.
At the end of the block, on the corner lot, was a red brick house. The stairs leading up the steep hill were flanked by some sort of ground cover. The realtor assured me it was virtually maintenance-free.
Leading Z up the steps, I looked down at her crinkled brow and smiled widely.
“Are we visiting someone?” she asked.
I climbed the white porch steps and punched a code into the realtor’s box hanging from the door handle. Zirah frowned harder as I took the key and unlocked the door. I swung it open, revealing an empty, sunlight-filled living room. The great room was a hideous shade of mauve that I itched to paint over, but everything else in the living, kitchen, and dining room combination was perfect. I’d fallen in love with the dark wood flooring, stone fireplace, and dozens of windows.
“You know Mitch?” I ask.
Zirah nodded. “Ty and Hank’s old friend? I met him last week.”
“Yeah, well, Hank, Ty, and I offered him a stake in Ink’d.”
Z blinked in surprise. “You did?”
“Yeah. He’s a good dude in a bad spot. His ex dropped a surprise baby on his doorstep and took off to god-knows-where.” I laughed at the look on her face. “That was about my reaction. I thought that shit only happened in the movies. But nope, he’s living it right n
ow. So he moved in with his parents so they could help him with his daughter. They live across the street there.”
I turned to the wall of windows at the front of the house and pointed. “When we decided to let Mitch buy in last week, we all came down here to hammer out the details and get some paperwork signed. One of my clients, a realtor, was standing in front of this house and I came over to say hey.”
Grabbing her hand, I pulled her through the great room to a wooden staircase. As we walked, I continued my story. “Turns out the owners decided to move to that new retirement community on the other side of town and Shane had just grabbed the listing. We were shooting the shit, wandering through the house when I saw this.”
Steering Zirah around the corner at the top of the stairs, I pushed open a dark wood door and guided her into the room. It was painted a deep navy, with raised rectangles arranged along the walls and ceiling. Two small windows sat high up, letting in a wash of light that covered the pale wood flooring.
Z walked to one of the walls and touched one of the raised shapes. “Are these…?”
“Acoustic tiles. Yup. The guy living here was a voice actor and this was his recording studio. At the time, it was full of recording equipment so it was a little crowded, but I thought it was really cool. The rest of the house is nice too. There’re three bedrooms and two bathrooms, a small backyard, and a car port. This neighborhood is nice, and it’s really close to Ink’d.”
“Okay?” Z asked tentatively, obviously unsure.
“I bought it.”
Zirah turned around fast, eyes wide and surprised.
I put a finger on her lips to silence whatever she was going to say.
“It was impulsive and I know I should have talked to you first, but if Shane listed it, it’d be gone fast. This place is perfect for us. It’s priced reasonably, all things considered, and was just too good to pass up.”
Sliding my hand behind her neck, I tilted her face up to meet my gaze. “I want us to live here, together.”