by Holly Renee
Everything she could ever want. Including Beck.
But she still didn’t seem happy.
“I’m going to go smoke.” She pulled a joint out of the top of her dress. “Anyone want to join?”
“No. Thank you.” I held up my drink. “This will probably kick my ass on its own.”
She gave me a smile that didn’t meet her eyes before she walked out the door.
“I don’t like that girl.” Allie was already pouring herself another drink, and I couldn’t blame her. So far, this was the most awkward party I had ever been to.
“I can tell.” I set my cup down on the table. “Maybe we should just leave.”
“I just got here.” She looked up at me, and I could see the sympathy on her face. I hated that look more than anything. “But we can go.”
“No.” I shook my head and smiled. “Make another drink. I’m fine.”
“You sure?”
“Yes.” I nodded and waggled my eyebrows at her. “Plus, how am I going to meet anymore Chads if we go home.”
I had no interest in meeting anymore Chads, or any other boys for that matter, but she didn’t need to know that. I just wanted her to have a good time, and if that meant I had to suffer through a few more hours at this party, I would.
I had asked her to be here with me, and she hadn’t even hesitated.
The two of us stuck to each other’s sides as we mingled and laughed.
And after about an hour, I almost forgot about Beck altogether.
Not really, but I hadn’t seen him.
It wasn’t until the two of us went outside to get a breath of fresh air that I ran into him again.
Beck had clearly been drinking. There were people all around us, and I could barely see his eyes against the pitch-black night. The lights that hung over Cami’s back yard did little to light it up.
“Allie, what’s the deal with you and Carson anyway?” It was the first words he had spoken to us since earlier with Cami, and he still wasn’t talking to me.
“There is no deal.” Allie stopped in front of him and seemed so uncomfortable by his question.
“Oh. There definitely is.” He leaned back in his chair and his beer bottle was held precariously between his fingers. His hair was in disarray, and I wondered if it had been his fingers to make it that way or Cami’s. Or some other girl at this party. “Don’t you think so, Josie?”
My stomach dropped when he said my name. “She said there’s not.”
“But girls lie.” He leaned forward and put his elbows on his knees. “Don’t they?”
Everyone around us was watching, and I wished he would just go back to ignoring me. Things were much easier then.
“Maybe the ones you’re used to.” I had no idea why I said it. I heard a few chuckles and gasps around me, but I didn’t care.
He looked away from me and brought his attention back to Allie. “I think he likes you.”
“I think you’re drunk.”
“Oh.” He pointed his beer bottle in her direction. “You are correct about that.”
“Your brother’s here,” Allie ignored Beck and whispered in my ear.
I looked over my shoulder, and sure enough, Lucas was in the house talking and laughing.
I hadn’t seen him since we first arrived. He had told me he wasn’t sure if he would be here.
Carson walked up as if he already knew, and he quickly looked between us and Beck.
“Beck, man. It’s time to go.”
“Oh, no.” He shook him off. “Josie was finally talking to me for the first time tonight. I can’t leave now.”
“I talked to you earlier,” I clarified, but he wasn’t having any of it.
“About Chad.” He snapped his fingers as if he suddenly remembered. “How could I forget that you were suddenly so into Chad Johnson?”
“Am I not allowed to be into Chad Johnson?” I had no idea why I was challenging him when he was like this, but he was pissing me off. He had no right to be jealous of any other guy.
Especially some guy I didn’t give two shits about.
“He’s a prick, so no.” He took a long drink from his beer, and Carson looked stressed.
“Who should I be into then, Beck?” I looked around the party. “Would Carson be better? Or maybe Olly?”
His dark eyes stared me down as I said his friends’ names, but I wasn’t scared of him. He didn’t just get to be an ass simply because he wanted to.
I turned my attention away from him and looked at his friend. “Carson?”
“You wouldn’t fucking dare.”
My gaze snapped back to him. “Wouldn’t I?” I pointed to my chest. “I’m single, and as far as I know, so is he.”
“Josie,” Allie whispered my name in warning, but I didn’t heed it. I just kept pushing and pushing until he did something other than sit there and act like he was some sort of fucking saint. Like he hadn’t used me to get exactly what he wanted.
“That’s the difference here, Clermont. I can figure out if I’m single or not. Can you?”
“You didn’t seem to care how single I was when you were riding my fingers.”
There were shocked inhales, a ring of chuckles, and a whispered ‘Oh, fuck.’
I wasn’t sticking around to listen though. I pushed away from Allie and headed toward the door. I couldn’t believe he would fucking say that.
In front of all these people.
I couldn’t believe he would fucking dare.
I was so angry, I could feel tears burning the back of my eyes, but I refused to cry.
There was noise behind me, what sounded like people moving, but I didn’t look back. I pushed through the crowd and headed back into Cami’s house. I found her room as quickly as I could and grabbed my bag. She had asked me to stay the night here, but there was no way in hell.
I needed to leave, and I needed to leave now. I text Allie and let her know I was leaving, and she said she was right behind me.
I hated leaving her, but I couldn’t stay here a moment longer.
I couldn’t be here with him.
I caught Lucas’s eyes as I made my way back down the stairs, and he moved over to me quickly. I didn’t have the energy to deal with him tonight either.
“You okay?” He was following me as I walked outside the door.
“I’m fine.” I shoved my key into the keyhole on my door and ripped the driver’s side door open. “I’m heading back to the house.”
“Have you been drinking?” Lucas actually seemed concerned, and I hesitated at the door. I had been drinking but I hadn’t had any in a while. I felt completely sober after talking to Beck.
“I’m good to drive. I promise.”
“Of course, you’re out here.” Beck’s laughter was slurred and shadowed by Carson’s cursing. “It’s my favorite Vos and my least favorite Vos.”
“Come on, man.” Olly tugged on Beck’s arm, but neither one of them could control him. He was heading straight for my car on unsteady legs.
He pushed his hands on the hood of the car, directly across from where I stood next to Lucas. “I’m sorry for saying that.”
“What did he say?” Lucas puffed his chest, and he stared at Beck like he wanted to kill him.
I pushed him back and stared at Beck. “You’re not sorry.”
“I am.” He looked at me. He looked like he was sincere, but I wasn’t going to believe him.
“Who’s taking him home?” I looked at Carson and Olly.
“Frankie’s coming to pick him up soon.”
I nodded and turned back to Lucas, but he was still staring at Beck. “Stay the fuck away from her.”
It was the wrong thing to say. Beck was far too intoxicated to deal with his anger toward Lucas.
“Her?” Beck nodded his head toward me. “Fucking make me.”
Lucas moved like he was going to confront him, but I stepped in his way. There was no way I was going to let him put his hands on Beck, or Beck put his hands on h
im.
This was going too far, and I wouldn’t stand here and watch them fight.
Beck moved around the hood of my car, and I knew that if he got his hands on Lucas, none of us would be able to stop him.
Olly and Carson grabbed his shoulders, but they wouldn’t have stood a chance.
“Put him in my car.” I pointed at Olly as I dared Lucas to say a word.
Olly and Carson jerked Beck backward and pushed him toward my passenger side.
“I’m not a fucking child.” Beck was pushing against Olly before he slammed my passenger side door.
“I’ll see you at the house.” I pointed at a still fuming Lucas.
I was so damn angry by the time I got my own door closed that I couldn’t talk. Beck Clermont was sitting there riding in the car I had borrowed from my dad with his perfect face and perfect life. If he wasn’t so drunk, I would yell at him. I would demand that he tell me what the hell his problem was and demand that he leave me the hell alone.
But he was angry too.
I could feel his rage still radiating off his body. He wanted to say something. He wanted to scream and shout and fight, and for whatever reason, he didn’t.
“Did you and Lucas have a fight over a girl?”
He laughed, but there wasn’t a single ounce of humor in it.
“Cami?” I asked. I didn’t know why but the thought of him being so worked up over Cami pissed me off.
“No.” He shook his head, and I wanted to ask him more about her. Why was he with me right now, when he could have been there with her? “It wasn’t Cami. Turn here.”
He pointed to the right, and I quickly made the turn. We were going in the opposite direction of our houses.
“I’m taking you home, Beck.”
“I just need to make a quick stop.”
I huffed but I had already made the turn. I was anxious as it was, considering I had been drinking earlier in the night, and I tightened my hands on the steering wheel as I drove down the dark road.
It was lined with trees on one side and the ocean on the other. The view was so beautiful. The moon was high in the sky, and it reflected off the water in a million diamonds of light. The water looked so peaceful and calm, a complete contrast to the world that hid beneath.
I glanced at Beck’s face as he stared out the window. It reminded me so much of him. He was so vast and an endless depth of secrets. It didn’t matter what I thought I knew about him; there would always be more that I didn’t know. There would always be so much more that he was hiding.
We rounded a large curve, and the golf course came into view. I had never driven this way to the club, and I wouldn’t have taken it if I knew this was where he was leading us.
“The club?” I asked, and he turned from the ocean to look at it.
“Yeah. Just a quick stop.”
I pulled into the parking lot, and it was weird how quiet and empty it seemed. This place was always brimming with employees and members, and it almost seemed eerie without a soul here.
Beck opened his door and climbed out. I followed quickly behind him, mostly because I didn’t want to be left in the car on my own.
“We can’t be here right now,” I whisper-shouted at him. I had no idea why I was whispering, but I felt like we were going to get in trouble.
He reached his hand into his pocket, and for the first time in what felt like forever, a genuine smile lit up his face as he pulled out the keys. “I have the keys, princess.”
He shoved them into the door, and I looked behind us. It didn’t matter that his dad owned this place. I still felt like we were doing something wrong. Like we were doing something that could easily get me fired.
We pushed through the door, and Beck quickly punched numbers into the security system that chirped at us. His fingers were clumsy, but it quit the moment he hit Enter.
He gripped my fingers in his and moved through the dark hallway with ease.
“Where are we going?” I followed after him as we passed the dining room and moved into the main hallway. He didn’t answer me. He just kept walking with my hand in his and determination on his face.
We pushed through a door that led to the pool, and I dug in my heels.
“Beck.”
“What?” He dropped my hand and tugged at the base of his t-shirt. I watched him as he lifted it over his head, struggling as he got to his shoulders, and I couldn’t stop staring at his toned stomach or the way his muscles disappeared into his jeans.
“We are not doing this.”
“Doing what?” He threw his shirt to the side and gripped my fingers in his again. He tugged me toward him as he walked a few steps backward.
“I told your friends that I would take your drunk ass home. Not that I’d let you go drown in a pool.”
“You won’t let me drown.” His fingers were toying with mine, and I could barely concentrate on what he was saying. I couldn’t concentrate on anything other than the feel of those damn fingers.
“I am not getting in that pool, Beck.”
He dropped my hand as we got to the edge and kicked off one of his shoes. He laughed as he almost tripped, and I cursed as I reached out for him.
“See, Josie.” He didn’t stop me from holding on to his arms. “You’re my little savior.”
“I am not your savior.” I shook my head. He was even drunker than I thought. “I just don’t want your death on my hands.”
His other shoe went flying and his hands dropped to his belt. I watched every second of him slipping the leather out of its buckle. His abs bunched and moved with every move of his arms, and even though I told myself I should look away, I couldn’t.
He popped the button of his jeans and slowly lowered his zipper. Black boxers still covered him, but I still felt suddenly hot. I felt like I was suddenly crossing a line with him even though I wasn’t doing anything wrong.
He tugged his jeans off his hips, and I dropped my hands from his arms.
“Are you coming?” He looked from me to the water. It looked perfectly inviting, the water was crystal clear and lit up from lights beneath it. I could hear the ocean crashing against the sand in the background, but I couldn’t see it. All I could see was him.
“Beck, this isn’t a good idea.” He wasn’t listening to me. He dived headfirst into the water. “Shit.” I kicked off my shoes in case I had to save his stupid ass, but he glided through the water before quickly coming to the top.
He pushed his dark, wet hair out of his face and grinned at me.
“You worried about me?” He cocked his head to the side and looked at my bare feet.
“Just because I don’t like you doesn’t mean I want you to drown.”
“You like me.” He was so sure of himself. He swam toward the edge of the pool and rested his arms on the concrete. “Come in.”
“I’m not getting in that water, Beck. Get out.”
“I’m not getting out until you get in.”
I shook my head and crossed my arms.
“Just put your feet in.”
I looked at him and I knew that he wouldn’t give up until I did. If Beck was nothing else, he was stubborn.
I tried to roll up the edge of my jeans, but they were too tight against my legs.
“Just take them off.” Beck smiled.
“You would like that, wouldn’t you?” I tugged them back down toward my ankles.
“I won’t even look.” He covered his eyes with his hands. “And I promise not to touch you.”
He was so full of shit. I knew that with absolute confidence, but it didn’t stop me from turning away from him and tugging my t-shirt out of the knot. I undid my jeans and pulled my t-shirt down over my ass before I tugged them down my legs.
I folded them as I took a deep breath and laid them on one of the lounge chairs. Beck was watching my every move as I made my way toward him. His chin was resting on his arms, but his eyes were solely on me.
I sat down next to him and dipped my toes into the
cool water. I slowly dragged my feet back and forth and watched the way the water cascaded over my legs. I did everything I could to avoid looking over at him.
“Are you happy now?” I held on to the edge of the pool and glanced over at him.
He was still just staring at me. I didn’t know if it was the alcohol or what was going through his head, but the mask he normally wore felt like it was slipping. His eyes looked more green than brown, and he looked like he was perfectly content in that moment. Just sitting there staring at me.
“I am happy.”
That should have made me feel good. It should have made me do anything other than becoming overwhelmed with anger. But when I closed my eyes, all I could see was her. Here he was with me breaking rules, basically breaking into the club, and he should have been with her.
“Cami,” I said her name, and he let his head fall back between his shoulders in exasperation.
“I don’t want to talk about Cami.”
“Well, that’s too bad, Beck.” My hands tightened on the pool’s edge. “I feel like Cami is the only thing we should be talking about right now.”
He shook his head, but I wasn’t finished.
“She’s your girlfriend.”
“I told you…” He practically growled out the words.
“You belong to her.”
“Fine.” He pushed his hair out of his face and moved closer to me. He placed his hands on either side of my legs, our fingers only centimeters apart.
He had a silver chain around his neck that I hadn’t noticed before. The water glistened off it, and I felt mesmerized as it dangled in the space between us.
“Let’s pretend like I am hers. That doesn’t stop you from wanting me.”
My gaze snapped up to his, and the urge to slap him was unreal. How dare he say something like that to me?
I pushed off the concrete in order to escape him. My leg was only halfway out of the water when his fingers gripped my thighs. “Please don’t.”
“Don’t slap Cami in my face.” My thighs shook beneath his touch. “I’m already aware that what we did was wrong.”