by Nicola Jane
“I was going to get rid of it,” she says, and I scoff at her lies. “I was,” she insists. “Ask Tillie, she was with me. I was about to sign the paperwork and I couldn’t do it.”
“You should have taken me, I would have signed it for you!” I hiss, and she recoils slightly. “You know I don’t want kids.”
“I didn’t either,” she snaps. “I’m still not sure I do, but I couldn’t go through with a termination, so here we are. I don’t want anything from you. Not money, not contact. You can go on like this never happened.”
“Right, and live my life knowing I have a kid out there somewhere. What kind of prick would that make me?”
“The kind who never asked for any of this,” she says. “It was my fault. I take full responsibility. I missed the pill more than once and didn’t give it a second thought. I’ve made this decision and I don’t expect you to alter your life in any way.”
I sigh and take a seat at the table. “What did your parents say?” She’d told me before how they are, and I know this news wouldn’t have been received well.
She rolls her eyes. “Apart from them offering to ‘sort it’ and then to ‘find a man to take me on’?” She laughs, but it’s not her usual light, carefree laugh. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. It’s taken me awhile to get my own head around it, and let’s be honest, whenever we’re together, we don’t exactly talk.”
“It’s why I use gags,” I admit. “Avoid the talking.”
She smirks. “Well, it’s late . . . or early . . . and you really shouldn’t break into people’s houses. It’s not considered polite,” she mutters. “And I’m tired, so . . .” She looks at the door, her hint for me to leave.
“What happens now?” I ask.
“We go on living—you as a single bachelor, just how you like it, and me as a single . . . mum.” She sucks in a breath and a panicked look passes over her face. “First time I’ve said it out loud,” she mutters, adding a smile that doesn’t reach her eyes.
I stand. “If you need money or anything—” I begin, but she shakes her head. Of course, she doesn’t need money. Her dad’s some fucking millionaire and part of the Freemasons brotherhood or some shit. Either way, she’d never be short of cash.
“I’ll see you out,” she mutters.
I follow her to the door. “Lock your windows,” I say.
“Noted,” she says, opening the door, and I step out. “Take care.”
“If you need—”
“I won’t. Thanks, though.”
“But if you—”
Sara closes the door, and I stare at it for a few seconds. It feels wrong to just leave like this, to walk away knowing what I know now. I play out an argument in my head, all the reasons to stay and then the reasons to cut and run. I pick up the tool kit and head to my bike. I wouldn't be a good dad. I never had one to show me how. I ignore the inner voice niggling in my ear about me abandoning this kid just like my dad did me and throw my leg over my bike. When I look up at Sara’s house, her silhouette is watching me from her bedroom window as I drive away.
Chapter Two
Sara
I eye Jacob in his grey sweats and bite my lower lip. He catches the move, of course, because he’s so in tune with me, it’s ridiculous. “Stop,” he says firmly.
“What?” I ask innocently.
“You know what. It ain’t happening.”
I take a bite of toast, smiling to myself. “It was a passing thought,” I say, shrugging.
“I’m not your go-to every time you’re feeling horny,” he points out.
“It’s Lake’s fault,” I admit miserably. Since he showed up a few nights ago, I’ve not got him out of my head. “And hormones,” I add. “I might have to go to Six tonight and get this out of my system.”
Jacob glares at me. “No,” he says firmly.
He hates Six. It’s a place where like-minded people can go and safely take part in kink. It’s where we both began our journey as a Dom/sub. Of course, back when we first went, neither of us knew what we liked. It was more of a joke on a night out. He didn’t look back, though, after that first night. For me, I like it, but not all the time. I’m too wild to be bossed around.
“What do you suggest?” I ask.
“Concentrating on having your baby and sorting out the mess that is your life,” he suggests.
I roll my eyes. “Boring! You know I’m gonna go, despite what you say.”
“If you go, I’m coming too. You need someone to watch over you,” he adds, and I smile triumphantly. I knew he’d come around to my way of thinking.
It feels good to be back here at Six, and despite his protests, Jacob seems quite relaxed as we find a table. “It feels like so long since we last came here,” he says, ordering himself a whiskey from the waitress. I stick to water.
“Maybe you should cancel your membership if you don’t come anymore,” I say.
“Maybe you should stop trying to antagonise me,” he warns, and I grin. I love him in Dom mode and I miss that part of our relationship.
“Are you going off to play?” I ask.
“I’m here to watch you,” he says, glaring at me with those stern eyes. I raise my eyebrows suggestively, and he scowls. “I mean to keep an eye on you because your head’s not in the right place, which is the exact reason I’m not taking your bait.”
“My head is fine,” I say. “It’s not that causing me issues.” I stare suggestively at a passing man dressed in a suit. He’s exactly the type I’d usually go for—dressed well, groomed, with a slight shadow dusting his jaw. He catches my eye and grins. Jacob clicks his fingers to get my attention, and when I look back, the guy’s moved on. “What the hell was that?” I snap.
“That was a warning,” he says.
I smirk and cross my legs to ease the aching there. “You know I don’t heed warnings.”
“It’s about fucking time you did,” he mutters, grabbing my hand and hauling me off towards a private room.
“Sara?” I freeze at the familiar voice. There’s no way it can be him. He told me straight he never uses these places, but there’s no mistaking that rich, deep, Irish accent. I turn slowly and stare into Lake’s eyes. Beside him stands a pretty, little, short-haired blonde. She’s dressed in a leather bodice, making me shudder. I hate leather. Her head remains bowed, and he’s holding her hand.
“Lake,” I almost whisper.
Lake’s eyes run over Jacob quickly, then he glares at me, a storm brewing in his dark eyes. “What are you doing here?”
“Same as you, I should imagine,” I retort, resisting the urge to roll my eyes.
“Is that a good idea?” he asks, his eyes flicking to my stomach.
“Have a good evening,” I say firmly.
He sighs. “You too.”
I watch him walk away, his hand still gripping the blonde’s. “Shit, that’s him?” asks Jacob, and I nod.
“Let’s get another drink,” I mutter. My sex drive just got trampled on. We go back to our seats, and Jacob orders another drink while I sip my water. There’s a woman on stage dancing seductively and I try to concentrate on her.
“Is he an exhibitionist?” asks Jacob, and I shrug. “I think he’s gone to the dungeon,” he adds, and I glance over to the room he’s talking about.
“I have an urge to go and see,” I say, but he shakes his head.
“Too many feelings going on between you. Don’t torture yourself.”
“I can’t help it,” I mutter, standing.
“Sara, he’s gonna be having sex with someone else. Are you ready for that?”
I shake my head. “No, but maybe it’ll help me move on.”
LAKE
Typical, I come here to forget the one person I can’t and she turns up. I try to take my mind off her and walk my sub around the dungeon. Maisy is new to this game and new to the club. She’s a club girl that Raven introduced because she needed a place to stay. We had a night together and she enjoyed some of my fucked-up shit
, which is rare to find these days.
I don’t come to places like Six usually, but the need to satisfy these urges has gotten worse since Sara. She’s a natural sub, and that’s probably why we’re so drawn to each other. I shake my head because, fuck, she’s always in it.
Maisy is staring at a young couple lying on one of the beds. The male asks me if she can join them. I don’t normally share, but tonight’s already gone to shit, and she shouldn’t suffer. “Do you want to?” I ask.
“Yes, please, Sir,” she responds.
Maisy crawls over to the couple, and I take a seat to watch.
I feel a shiver and glance behind me as Sara passes. I catch her eye and hold it for a few seconds. She’s with the man from her bed the other night, and I know I can’t tell her what to do, but fuck, if she starts playing in here with him, I’ll lose my head.
The dungeon monitor passes, nodding to me in greeting. I take my focus back to Maisy and zone in on the way she’s riding the guy. She’s having a little too much fun, and I narrow my eyes. I’m contemplating stopping her when I spot Sara again walking back over to the other side of the room. The guy she’s with suddenly stops her, places his hand around her neck, and leans closer, speaking into her ear. She’s smirking, and my cock instantly comes alive. She likes to test the boundaries. Jealousy rips through me—it should be me holding her like that, letting her push my buttons.
I’m up out of my chair and moving towards them before I can talk myself out of it. As I approach, the man releases her, and she spots me. “We gotta talk,” I mutter. It’s against the rules to just talk to another Dom’s sub the way I am, but fuck the rules, she was mine first.
“It’s not a good idea,” the guy says to Sara. Her eyes plead with him, and that pisses me off more.
“Get rid of the fucking clown, Sara,” I snap, my patience thinning.
“Who the fuck are you calling a clown?” he demands, and Sara rushes to stand between us.
“Jacob, it’s fine. Go to the bar and I’ll come find you.”
He eyeballs me for a second longer before storming out. I grab Sara by the wrist roughly, too pissed to stay calm, and drag her through the dungeon to a vacant private room.
“Are you in a relationship with him?” I growl, slamming the door.
“A Dom/sub thing or real?” she asks.
“Either . . . both,” I snarl.
“No. He’s my friend.”
That eases my jealousy a little, and I nod. “You fuck him?”
“Yes,” she admits, and I’m straight back to raging.
“Like you fuck me?” I snap.
“You weren’t that memorable, so I can’t compare,” she says with a smirk.
I grab her throat and push her against the red velvet wall. She sniggers, knowing exactly what she’s doing. “Maybe you need reminding,” I hiss, squeezing tighter.
“I’m taking Jacob back to my place,” she whispers. “I have to go.” She’s gasping for breath, and my cock strains harder.
“Get on your fucking knees and open your mouth,” I growl. “NOW!”
She slowly lowers to her knees and her mouth falls open. I lean back against the padded bench and stare at her. She looks beautiful. “Legs,” I remind her, and she shuffles her knees further apart. “Skirt,” I add, and she rolls her skirt until it’s around her waist. I pull my belt from my jeans and snap the leather together. She jumps at the sound, and it thrills me. “Crawl,” I say, and she slowly crawls towards me until her face is almost pressed against my erection. I release it and pump my hand up and down until a droplet of precum shines. “Do you want to taste it?” I ask, and she nods. I crack the belt against her ass, and she yelps in surprise. “Say it!”
“Yes, please,” she begs sarcastically and earns another strike, hissing when it burns her skin. “Sir,” she snaps. She pretends to hate this part, the bossiness, but she secretly loves it.
I put the belt around her neck, threading the end through the buckle and tightening it. “Your safe word?” I ask. She smiles up at me and lets her tongue dart out to taste my cum. I yank the belt tighter, and she coughs. “Just for that, I might not let you come,” I whisper, and she glares at me. “Safe word?” I grit out.
“Jacob—” she begins, and I shove my fingers into her mouth, pressing her tongue down so she can’t finish the sentence.
“Don’t you fucking dare say his name,” I warn. I remove my hand and grip her hair tight. “Your word is ‘bitch’. Now, suck it.”
She runs her tongue under my shaft and then envelopes the end of my cock in her warm, wet mouth. My head falls back, and I tug on the belt and her hair, forcing her to take me deeper. I don’t stop until I feel her throat reject me and I ease off slightly before repeating it. The sound of her choking on my cock has haunted me for weeks.
I watch her gag, her eyes streaming, and I push her down as far as she can go, then hold her there. Her nostrils flare, but she stays there, staring up at me with her mouth full of me. She’s fucking hot. I withdraw and push back in, feeling the orgasm building. I slow my thrusts as I burst into her mouth, filling it with cum. My legs shake and I roar loud enough for the next room to hear as I release. She hates it when I do that, and I grin as she scowls, wiping her mouth on the back of her hand.
“You’d better get back to him,” I say, tucking myself in my jeans. She stands, hands on her hips, glaring at me. “Problem?” I ask.
“Yes!” she snaps.
I push off the wall quickly, taking her by surprise, and spin her away from me. I pull her back against my chest and push my hand into her panties. She cries out, and I smile at how wet she is. Wet for me. I hold her tight against me and rub her clit hard and fast. It takes seconds for her to tremble. She grips the arm I have over her chest and cries out. I feel the wetness coat my hand but keep rubbing until she pushes my hand away. “Now, go back to your Master,” I growl in her ear before pushing her towards the door.
“Pres,” I call, following Riggs as he goes to his office.
“Lake?”
“BDSM clubs,” I say, grinning, but he frowns at me. “You wanna take on more legal businesses, right?” I ask. “BDSM clubs.”
Riggs pinches the bridge of his nose. Patience is not his strong point. “You mean kinky sex places? How the fuck is that legal?”
“It is,” I say. “Sort of. Private gentlemen’s club is how we’d advertise it.”
“Brother, I know you like that shit, loads of the guys do, but I don’t know if it’s worth us investing.” He sighs. “Look, get me some figures together and I’ll take a look.”
“Already did it,” I say, placing a folder on his desk.
“‘Course you did,” he mutters.
“I know a guy selling. It’s all in there,” I say, pointing to the folder. “Pres, the place is a gold mine. You have your connections for sex toys, right? It makes sense.”
“Why’s he selling?” Riggs opens the folder and glances over the first page, the listing for Six.
“He’s moving to the other side of the world and needs the cash to start again over there. Man, I went last night, and the place was packed out. We wouldn’t have to put in any work to get people signed up—the guest list and members lists are completely full. If we can raise the money, this place will make sure we can put an end to some of the bigger drug runs you hate.”
“It might be a little out of the club’s price range,” says Riggs.
“I have some set aside. I’d like to partner with the club. It’s all in the plan, Pres.”
“Shouldn’t you be saving for your kid? Your cash would be better spent there, don’t you think?” he suggests, but I stare at the ground. “Oh, it’s like that?” he asks.
“She doesn’t want me involved, Pres,” I say, shrugging, and Riggs laughs, but it’s cold. “I can’t force her to let me be a part of the kid’s life.”
“Fuck, brother, I’m the last person who can give advice on this sort of shit. Lord knows how much I’ve fucked
up recently, but you walk away from this kid, you’ll spend a lifetime regretting it. She might say she don’t want you involved, but I saw the way she used to watch you when she stayed at the club with Tillie. Brother, don’t you wanna take care of this kid?”
I shift uncomfortably. “I never wanted kids,” I admit.
“Life don’t always work out how we thought. It doesn’t mean it’ll be worse for it.”
“I’d be a shit dad.”
“Ain’t none of us perfect at that role,” he says. “I know you had issues, brother, growing up and all, but don’t let the past define who you are now.”
I leave his office with my head wrecked. It’s not that I’ve found it easy walking away from Sara. I’ve never met a woman like her, and she loves the same fucked-up shit as me, which is rare. She’s still new to it while I have years of experience, but I could train her to be my perfect sub. Then, when I think of a baby thrown into the mix, my blood runs cold. Two-point-four children was never what I had planned for my life.
“Is it true?” Charlotte, my recently discovered sister, walks towards me holding a newspaper. “Sara is pregnant?”
“If it says it in that rag of a paper, then it must be,” I joke.
“This isn’t the time for your jokes. So I’m gonna be an aunt?” She suddenly looks happy and hopeful, and I feel an arse for having to crush her.
“Lottie, it ain’t gonna be like that,” I begin.
“Of course, it is. I’ve always wanted to be an aunt. I’ll be so great at it.”
“She doesn’t want me involved.”
Charlotte’s face changes instantly and she looks fit to explode. “She’s shutting you out? Well, she can’t do that. You have fucking rights,” she snaps.
“I’m good with her decision,” I admit, and she stares at me open-mouthed. “I’ve never wanted kids.”