Kneel

by Elyzabeth M. VaLey

  “He did,” she said softly. “Antonio.”

  Thomas’s gaze softened. The fingers on his hand moved as if approaching hers then stopped. She closed the distance between them, brushing against them and reveling in the current of electricity which stung her system, infusing her with a bravery she’d forgotten she’d possessed.

  “It was on our fifth date.” She sighed.

  “You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to,” Thomas said.

  “It’s all right.” She shrugged. “It was a long time ago.”

  “All right.”

  “We were on our fifth date. We’d gone to dinner and were making out in his car. He tangled his fingers in my hair and pulled. Slightly. The thrill was beyond anything I’d ever experienced. Antonio asked me if I liked it. I did. So, he did it again but combined it with more physical stimulation. I enjoyed it a lot. He told me he thought I was a natural.”

  “Submissive.”

  “Yeah. We didn’t have sex that night. Instead, he sent me home and told me I couldn’t masturbate. By the time I saw him again the next day, I was desperate for a fuck.” Kendra sniggered.

  “You obeyed him.”

  She shrugged. “I liked him a lot and I wanted to please him.”

  “I see.”

  “Things got serious quickly. He started asking for more and I started giving it.”

  “More?”

  “Submission. Or at least that’s what I thought. I realized years later he was really asking for slavery.”

  “You had to be at his disposal twenty-four seven.”

  “Yes, but it was more than that. He controlled everything. I worked two jobs so I could pay for college, but he told me there were better job opportunities for me out there.” Kendra smirked. “One of his friends had taken a fancy to me and wanted to take some pictures.”

  “Pictures.”

  “Provocative poses, clothes on. At the beginning it was fine, but Antonio kept pushing for more. By the end of it, I was naked.”

  “How did you feel?”

  Kendra ran her fingers through her hair. “I enjoyed it. The attention, the cameras, the knowledge I could make all those men hard and they couldn’t touch me.” She laughed. “It was once again a power trip and the bonus was I was pleasing Antonio above all. He lavished his attention on me after. Told me what a good girl I was and bought me gifts.”

  “Wow.”

  “Yeah. What I didn’t know was his friend was publishing the pictures and had paid him a shit load of cash for it.”

  “You didn’t know?”

  “No idea, not until the university expelled me for indecent behavior.”

  “Fuck,” Thomas swore.

  “Yeah. I confronted Antonio about it, but he convinced me he’d done it all for my own good and I could be someone much more important if I got into modeling than if I continued studying. Next thing I knew, Antonio had booked another photo shoot. We got paid. People liked it. What started out small and slowly grew. The more pictures I took, the more time Antonio spent with me. I was starved for attention. I wanted it all.” Kendra shook her head. “Until that one night.”

  Chapter Seven

  “That one night?”

  Kendra nodded.

  Thomas waited for her to continue but as if on cue, her phone began to ring. Kendra pulled it out of her bag and muttered something under her breath. She answered the call.

  He sipped at his coffee, listening in on her part of the conversation.

  She rolled her eyes. “Yes, I’ll be there in thirty minutes. I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize. Yes. Yes. I know.” She hung up and looked at him, her green eyes brimming apologetically. “I’m so sorry. I have to go. I didn’t realize it was so late.”

  “I understand. Time flew.”

  “Yes. I thought we’d only be a short while, a few questions and that’s it, and I’ve ended up telling you my life story. You’ve had me enthralled.”

  “And you haven’t finished,” he pointed out.

  Kendra glanced at him. She placed her phone back in her bag and shrugged her coat on before answering. “No. I haven’t.”

  “Can I see you tomorrow?”

  She hesitated. “Wednesday,” she said without looking at him.

  Thomas nodded. “Wednesday. Same time. Same place.”

  “Here?”

  “Unless you want something different.”

  Kendra shrugged but he didn’t miss the slight curving of her lips. “I’ll see you on Wednesday.”

  “Kendra.”

  She turned around.

  “I’ve spent almost ten years following you around like a lovesick fan. Now I know we could be more, I’m not going to forget.”

  She swallowed visibly. “Just because you won’t forget doesn’t mean anything will happen.”

  Thomas laughed. “True, but I just want you to know my intentions.”

  “We’ll see,” she murmured. “Bye, Thomas.”

  Chapter Eight

  Kendra glanced at her reflection in the car mirror one more time. She looked perfect except for the slightly crazed look in her eyes. She was nervous. She shouldn’t be, but she couldn’t help it. The more she thought about it, the more she realized she was into Thomas. It was ridiculous. She didn’t date people. She didn’t get to know them. She met them, fucked them, and left them. She didn’t need more. She couldn’t give more. Yet, with Thomas, she wanted to take a step forward. It was a new feeling, which scared her, but she couldn’t bring herself to stay away. She was eager to participate in his project and to see him again.

  The bell above the door chimed and her gaze went to the table next to the window. Thomas sat there, head bowed, typing furiously onto his computer. Abruptly, he looked up. Their gazes locked, her heart momentarily stopping. His lips spread into a smile which kicked it into gear again. She practically glided to him. After hanging her coat, she sat down across from him. He grasped her hand and squeezed, the gesture more intimate than a mere handshake and making her cheeks burn.

  “Kendra,” he said breathily. “How are you?”

  “Good. You?”

  “Better now you’re here. Green tea?”

  “Yes, please.”

  Thomas stood and ordered at the bar. He came back holding her tea and a plate of cookies.

  “You’re going to make me fat,” she said, picking one up.

  He laughed. “You would still be beautiful.”

  “Thanks. You’re too kind.”

  “It’s the truth. How has your week been so far?”

  “Good. Busy.” Kendra sipped at her tea. Thinking about you whenever I wasn’t working. “We’ve been putting the finishing touches on a shoot. Yours?”

  “Pretty good. I’ve been working on the book. I have a few more questions for you, if that’s okay. After, we can take the pictures.”

  “Sure.”

  Thomas glanced at the computer screen as if checking his notes. He pulled out his phone and hit the record button. “So, on Sunday you told me you dropped out of college and submerged yourself in the industry. Didn’t you ever want to go back?”

  Kendra sighed. “Yes. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t regret practically anything I’ve done, but not finishing college haunted me until last year.”

  “Last year?”

  She smiled. “I finished my business degree online. I’m aware my career isn’t going to last forever, so I needed a backup plan.”

  “Are you going to start your own business?”

  She nodded. “That’s what I’d like to do.”

  “What kind of business?”

  She grinned. Thomas picked up his cup and took a sip. Kendra leaned forward and caught his gaze.

  “A sex shop.”

  Thomas sputtered and began coughing.

  “Are you okay?” She handed him a napkin, unable to hide the giggle bubbling out.

  “Yes, sorry. It just wasn’t what I had expected.”

  Kendra laughed freely. “I’m sorry. What
did you expect?”

  “I don’t know, but that wasn’t it.”

  “I need to play to my strengths. I know about the sex industry and I know about business. It’s a solid plan. Besides, sex always sells.”

  “Sure. Of course. You’re right.” Thomas wiped his mouth.

  “You don’t believe I can.”

  “No.” Thomas reached across the table and grasped her hand, making a current travel up her arm. “I know you can. From everything I know about you, Kendra Williams, I know you’re more than capable of doing anything you set your mind to. If you’d told me you’re opening a bakery, I know you would be successful too. You’re perseverant and hard-working.”

  Kendra blushed at the intensity in his gaze and the compliment. It wasn’t what she usually got. Most people commented on her image and her pictures. It never went beyond that.

  “Thanks,” she murmured. “Shall we continue with the interview?”

  “Of course.” Thomas cleared his voice and checked his laptop. “What do you do in your free time?”

  Chapter Nine

  Thomas’s heart was going to jump out of his chest. Finally having Kendra sitting in front of him, chatting with her, was beyond anything he’d ever imagined. He took in every detail of her reactions. She was slightly insecure, surprised every time he asked her a question about herself instead of her career. Though it was sad to think no one had scratched the surface to this amazing woman, he was greedily excited to be the first one to do so.

  “Is that a real question or are you flirting with me?” Kendra batted her eyelashes, then looked away, then back at him, making Thomas’s cock twitch.

  “It was a real question until you looked at me like that.”

  Her laughter made his stomach clench with pleasure.

  “I’m sorry, it’s just not your usual interview question.”

  “What is a usual interview question for you?”

  “Have you ever had sex with the people in the shoot? What do you think about when you’re shooting? Does it turn you on? Would you do porn? Why haven’t you done porn?”

  “I see. Well, this isn’t a usual interview, is it? Remember I want to capture the you behind the cameras. The one people don’t see.”

  “Do you think people care about that?”

  “Not all of them do, but a lot will have their interest piqued. Or so I hope.”

  Kendra nodded. “Me too.” She sipped at her tea. “Anyway, other than posing for pictures, performing and whatnot, I enjoy reading.”

  “What kind of books?”

  “Mystery and fantasy.”

  “Favorite book?”

  “Discworld.”

  Thomas nodded.

  “What would humans be without love?”

  “Rare,” Kendra finished the quote. “You’ve read them?”

  “Yeah, I’m a fan too.”

  “Guess we have something in common.”

  “Other than chemistry.”

  “Indeed. What else do you like doing, Kendra?”

  “Going out for walks or to the movies. I watch the occasional series on Netflix too.”

  “That’s three things we have in common,” Thomas pointed out.

  “Now, you’re just flattering me.”

  “Not at all.”

  She laughed again.

  “I was going to ask coffee or tea but that much is clear.”

  “I never got the taste for coffee.”

  “Cheese or chocolate?”

  “Chocolate. I have a sweet tooth which I struggle to keep under control.”

  “Gym?”

  “Absolutely. Every day for at least two hours.”

  “Sleep?”

  “On the left side of the bed.”

  “Favorite position during sex?”

  “Doggy.”

  Thomas grinned. “That was just me being curious.”

  “You’re bad,” she replied with a glint in her eye.

  Thomas smirked. “And you don’t even know the half of it.” He continued to fire questions at her, interspersing more personal ones with lighthearted ones. “All right. I think I have all the information I need. Let’s take the picture before the sun sets.”

  “Outside?”

  “Yes, that had been my plan.” He shut his laptop and stowed it in his bag. “Um, did you bring makeup remover?”

  “What?”

  “Remember how I told you this was about the real you? I’ll snap some pictures with makeup, but I also want to take some without it, to see the you behind the lipstick, eyeliner, and blush.”

  Kendra stared at him as if he’d suddenly grown two heads. “Are you serious?”

  “Absolutely.”

  Her jaw fell slack. “I’m speechless,” she murmured.

  Chapter Ten

  Kendra stared at Thomas. Never in a million years did she expect him to ask her to take a picture sans makeup. It unnerved her almost as much as if he’d asked her to remove her clothes then and there.

  “Come on. If you don’t like it, we’ll work something different.”

  After putting on his jacket, he shouldered his laptop and camera bag. Reaching for her coat, he offered to help her into it. She took it from him instead, needing some distance to be able to gather her thoughts.

  “This way.”

  They walked to the nearby park in silence, for which she was grateful. Her mind raced and her heart accompanied it at the same tempo. Thomas threw her off balance. One moment, she was bantering with him and the next, he was asking something outrageous. Wild. Yet, not impossible. Daring. Different. New. Kendra clenched her fist. She wanted to please him and try to take the picture he wanted without any makeup.

  “There.” He pointed to a bench beneath a tree, touched by the last rays of sunlight. “Sit there.”

  After dropping his belongings to his feet, he whipped out his camera and focused the lens on her. Now, being in front of a camera was something she could do with her eyes closed. It was her job, and posing was almost as natural to her as breathing. Kendra crossed her legs and tilted her head. She smiled seductively. The sound of the shutter working reached her. She pouted. Then, licked her lips and toyed with her nail. A young man jogged by and did a double-take at them. Kendra put on another pose.

  “Now place your hands on your lap and don’t do anything,” Thomas commanded.

  “All right,” she said. She did as he asked, but the corner of her lips moved automatically, and she fidgeted. “I didn’t think it’d be so hard to sit still.”

  “When was the last time you posed for a picture with friends?” Thomas asked. “Not a professional one?”

  She shook her head. “I can’t remember. Not too recently and even then, I always smile or do something with my face. “I’m sorry, Thomas,” she said.

  “Don’t be. You haven’t done anything wrong.” Thomas frowned. He clasped his camera and seemed to look at her, but his mind was clearly elsewhere. A couple walked by hand in hand and glanced their way. Kendra straightened her spine and swept her hair to one side. The man stumbled and the woman nudged him in the ribs.

  “I’m just thinking about how we can make this work. Would you care to come to my house?” Thomas asked.

  She returned her attention to him.

  “The setting might not be as pretty, but it’ll be more intimate, and I think it would help. I think here you feel on display, as if you’re acting.” He nodded toward the runner from earlier who reappeared on the same path for the third time. His gait slowed and he glanced at her. Kendra winked at him and he sped off.

  “A bit. But now?”

  “I don’t live far from here. I mean, if you have other plans, we can make another date.”

  Kendra chewed on her bottom lip. She’d cleared her afternoon schedule in anticipation of Thomas’s interview and she was going to see it through. “No, that’s all right.”

  Thomas’s eyes lit up and pleasure coursed through Kendra at the sight.

  “I can drive yo
u over there.”

  “I rather take my own car.”

  “Of course. I’ll give you the address,” he said.

  They walked back to their cars and Thomas gave her directions to get to his place. As soon as he’d driven off, she sat in her vehicle and called her aunt Amara. They weren’t really family as Kendra’s biological relatives kicked her out after they found out her line of work, but sixty-five-year-old Amara had always been there for her.

  “If it isn’t my favorite niece. How are you, sweetheart?”

  “Good, Auntie. Er, I gotta be quick. I’m going to a photographer’s house.”

  “What?” Amara shrieked. “Obviously, this isn’t a professional thing or you wouldn’t be calling me. Who is he?”

  “Thomas Helton.”

  “I have no idea who that is, but I’m googling him when we hang up.”

  Kendra chortled. “He’s a BDSM photographer. Specializes in couples and em, submissives.”

  “Oh my goodness, sweetheart. He’s a Dom, isn’t he? Is that why you’re going to his house? But why are you calling me? Don’t you trust him? You shouldn’t play with someone you don’t trust.”

  “I know, Auntie.” Kendra smiled. “I’m actually going to his house for a shoot, but I like him and well, he’s a hardcore fan and you know how it can be.”

  “Yeah, I remember the stalker from a few years ago.”

  “Aha. It doesn’t hurt to be safe, right?”

  “Of course not, though, do you think he’s dangerous, sweetheart?”

  Of stealing my heart. “No, but well, you’re the only person who knows all of my past, Amara,” Kendra said. “I don’t trust easily. Besides, we’ve been doing this for years. I go to the home of someone I don’t know so well and you have my back, just in case, well, you know.”

  “Of course. Don’t worry, you know I’m here for you. Shoot me the address. Want me to call you in an hour?”

  “Yeah, that’d be great. Thanks.”

  “No problem. Talk soon. Love you.”

  “Love you too. Bye.”

  Kendra hung up and sighed. She felt a bit better now her aunt knew where she was going to be, but the truth was, she’d called Amara because she wanted to talk to someone about Thomas and the way he made her feel. She knew she wouldn’t judge her and would look after her as she always did.