She didn’t like the idea of him buying a car, for with all the accidents and drunk driving on the road these days, she was afraid for his life. But Rudi never pay her any mind. Him come home early the evening, face light-up shine, eyes merry and take her outside to see the car parked by the gate. Then him drive them around the block, she and Delores and Rosa, all the while showing off how the gadgets work: windows that slide down when you push the button; doors that lock simultaneously from another button; and so forth.
Over in Glastonbury, at the furniture warehouse, she pick out the mahogany table and the eight matching straight back chairs. A certain warmness fill her heart as her bottom sink down into the seats, just like the advertisement did say. And the Saturday when them deliver it, she never feel any regret putting Samuel’s old enamel table to rest down in the basement.
The whole business with Walter seem settled for the time being. She wasn’t sure about her plans exactly, but she write and send away for the proper Immigration papers, nonetheless. For as bad as everybody make Walter out to be, even she in her moments of wrath, can’t help but to feel sorry for him. Maybe him well miss the children. Men don’t give birth. Them don’t carry around babies in them bellies for nine months. But that don’t mean them can’t feel attached, can’t love them, can’t miss them just as much. When the papers arrive, Gwennie file them underneath her brown Bible on her bureau. And every Saturday when Delores dust, she wipe her rag longside the papers taking care not to spray Endust on them.
Two weeks before the children arrive, Gwennie get a letter from Aunty Cora and one from Peppy. But as eager as she was to hear news from back home, she was afraid to open them. Walter’s letter and the news it bring still rest heavy on her mind. She open Peppy’s first. The letter was short and to the point. Her handwriting neat and tidy. All letters form the way, she, Gwennie, used to teach grade one school children. All commas and full stops in them proper place. She thank Gwennie very much for the money she send, and yes, she plan to put it to wise and meaningful use. Peppy continue on to say she’s quite happy to come abroad. Aunty Cora mention that the possibilities there are endless, therefore she’s looking forward very much to come and especially to see Rudi again. Hope to see them all soon.
And after she read the letter two times over, her mind run on the compositions about ‘My Pet’ she used to assign her grade two children, even though she know most of them never have any. But them put imagination to good use. ‘My pet is a dog by the name of Rover,’ them would write, ‘I feed her three times a day and take her for long walks in the park.’ Gwennie fold up the letter and put it inside the envelope on top of Walter’s immigration papers.
But it was Aunty Cora’s letter that stir her up, causing her to become more and more apprehensive about Peppy’s coming. Aunty Cora start off: ‘Don’t be surprised if she start to ask plenty questions about this father business. Everyday she bother my tail about who this father is. I write Clara and ask her what to do. But she never have much to say, for it’s such a long time, she can’t even remember the fellow’s name or where him come from. And as Peppy flowering out and turning into big woman, she need to know these things . . .’
Gwennie never read anymore. She fold up the letter and push it back in the envelope. She was sitting down around her new table-and-chair set in the dining room, the Saturday morning, a steaming cup of mint tea in front her. Delores and Rudi were out, and Rosa lay sprawled off on her bed watching Saturday morning cartoons. Gwennie stretch out her two hands on the table and rest her head on them, eyes close. For all of a sudden she was feeling dead tired.
Imagine all this time she thought it was over and done with. But not so. It seems as if she going to be on trial for the rest of her life. As for Luther, it seem so long ago now and far back. If Peppy never resemble him, you could almost swear it never happen. Luther Rowe, she think his name was. She don’t even know where him born or even grow up. She think maybe him did mention something about Actingbeddy school, but who to tell.
Never talked much about family. But she think him have a half-brother that run a restaurant at one of the big tourist places, either Negril or Montego Bay, she can’t quite remember now. His mother pass on when him was small, in childbirth with his sister. Baby’s cord knot up inside, choke her to death. His father bring in a lady to live with them after that. She don’t know what she going to tell Peppy if she start to ask questions. Personally, she would rather if things just lay down sleep and not bother her head, for what she can’t understand is who put it in Peppy’s head first of all. Only Aunty Cora and Grandma know, unless damn inquisitive Mile Gully’s people say something to her. That was the very reason she beg and caution Aunty Cora against sending Peppy down there too often. Then if Peppy know, Walter bound to know. But then him don’t mention it in the letter.
Maybe him waiting till she send for him, then him bring everything out into the open, shame her in front the rest of children, call her all kinds of names. Sweat trickle down Gwennie’s hair root, and as she reach out her hand for the mug of mint tea so she can sip it and settle her stomach, a sharp pain knife through her shoulder causing her to bawl out in alarm. She reach for the mug again, and this time the pain wasn’t as piercing, but her shoulder continue to tingle.
The same week Peppy and Jeff was to come, Gwennie find herself lay-up in bed, can’t move a tall, all kinds of rubbings and pain relief and hot water bottle prop up around her. Delores and Rudi did have to help with the cooking and cleaning of house. The very Friday evening Peppy’s plane land, only Rudi alone could meet her at the airport. Delores stay home with Gwennie, who, although wasn’t as bad the day before, take a turn for the worse, Friday.
PART NINE
I
Peppy and Jeff never have the same long line to wait in like Rudi and Delores and Dave. There was only a forty-five minutes wait at Customs, where the men in uniforms search through suitcases and stamp passports five and six different times.
Peppy spot Rudi right away. For although him look different, his knock-knees give him away. For only them alone knock that special, causing his feet to flare out at the edges while the knees gather together, no matter the cut to the trousers. His hair wasn’t as tall either. It was close-cut to the scalp and laying down flat with a part to the side, like she see the black guards wear at New York airport. Him never look as stout either, with all the junk food she hear so plentiful in America and bad for the heart, his clothes sit on him neat as always, colours blending in well. But the way him stand up now, back straight, head hold high as it turn from one end of the airport to the other, looking for she and Jeff, him give off a sense of sureness about life, almost as if him comfortable with himself; spirit was at ease. Only Pastor Longmore up at Aunty Cora’s church on Communion Sundays give off such an air.
‘Watch the bags. And please watch them properly. I going to call him,’ Peppy tell Jeff, for Aunty Cora tell her, if you not careful in America, them steal out your very eyes out your head and you don’t know it. Then she walk over to where him stand up—Peppy, now fifteen, limbs stretch out tall, lengthening her up to almost the same height as Rudi.
And is only when she reach up close and take a good look at his face that she realize what was so different about him. Him was happy. Not just glad she come, that too, but the happiness she see now that ripple out of his belly, widen out his face and brighten up his eyes is the same kind Pastor Longmore claim him get when the spirit fill his soul. And she know Rudi don’t go to church for him write often about the arguments between him and the mother, so it was a happiness coming from source Pastor Longmore don’t mention yet.
‘Where is everybody?’ she ask, after hugging, and Rudi explaining that him have so much to tell her and so many people him want her to meet and so many things to show her, that him don’t quite know where to begin.
‘Something happen to Mama’s shoulder,’ him say, as them walk back to where Jeff was guarding the suitcases, ‘so Delores stay home with her. Sometimes she�
��s alright and can work, but other times she have to take to her bed. Doctor say is stress-related, she must relax more. She think is arthritis, though.’ Him shrug.
And as Rudi hug and kiss Jeff and comment on how Grandma’s cooking well agree with him, for him certainly sprout up the short time him was living there and turn handsome from the fine haircut Grandpa give him, Peppy’s mind run on Aunty Cora who she left back at home in bed just recovering from a case of bad sickness.
Everything was going okay. Aunty Cora seem more than excited she leaving for Foreign. ‘Gal,’ she say to Peppy one day, clearing her voice and eyes that seem to be constantly watery these days. (Aunty Cora claim that it’s the cataract growing back and the plenty pressure it put on her brain cause her eyes to fog up and turn red often. But Peppy know better). ‘Gal, I know you have ambition, so you will go far. I won’t live to see or hear about it, but I will rest in peace, for I did me duty.’
Then one week before she leave, almost like a bad luck, Aunty Cora take down sick. Miss Gertie, who’d agreed to come back after some form of compromise between she and Leslie and Aunty Cora, try and nurse Aunty Cora as best she could. And when is not Cerosee tea she boil and give to her, is ginger root. And when is not Bitters, is dry Excelsior crackers or plain rice without salt and butter to calm her stomach. But Aunty Cora couldn’t keep down a thing in her belly. And all Peppy could do was sit down beside her and hold her hand. She’d never seen Aunty Cora so afraid, the eye water falling just as plentiful as the vomiting.
When the vomiting start up again the second day, with sprinklings of blood inside it this time, Leslie send for Doctor Lord to come quickly. And after him take temperature and perform tests, stop the vomiting and was inside with Aunty Cora alone for about two hours going on three, taking urine samples, asking her questions and probing her belly with his fingers, him finally step outside to where almost all of New Green was waiting in the yard to hear the final diagnosis.
Doctor Lord call Leslie alone, and the two of them walk towards the back of the house, talking together in low tones. Not long after, Doctor Lord gather up his bag and drive away. Leslie didn’t even bother to tell Miss Gertie, for him claim her mouth too blasted flightly, but him tell Peppy and a few of Aunty Cora’s close friends. Peppy wasn’t sure what him tell New Green people to pacify them, but when him tell Aunty Cora’s two friends, them just grimace and walk way, face and eyeballs expressionless, back bend slightly forward.
Peppy wasn’t quite sure what to do with the news. According to Doctor Lord, Aunty Cora didn’t have much time left. The cancer in her belly was spreading fast and that is why she can’t keep down her food. She’s too old to cut, him tell Leslie, so we just have to wait till she erupt. One day when she get up to go to toilet, the entire belly will just fall out. Him did leave plenty bagfuls of medicine and pain killers on Aunty Cora’s bureau, but him caution Leslie don’t say a word to her about how serious it is, for no matter how strong she might be, she will never bear up under this kind of news.
The news rest heavy on Peppy’s chest, this whole business about eruption and what it means. Leslie didn’t know either. Him tell her about the woman who did have it in her breast and how maggots take to the breast and eat it up. But Peppy tell him no, that different. That wasn’t going to be the case with Aunty Cora. Aunty Cora was too God fearing, and according to what she hear, that woman used to drink rum and curse plenty. Would never go to church and treat her children decent. Aunty Cora’s too good for that kind of suffering to overtake, Peppy explain. She have too much strength of heart. She joke around too much. Too many people love and respect her.
A few days later Aunty Cora was back on her two feet as Peppy expected, chatting and laughing with her friends again who climb all the way up the hill to visit her, and sipping her white rum on the side same way although Doctor Lord caution her against it.
‘Peppy, come on,’ Rudi bawl out, ‘time to go home.’
She never have much to carry. Only the same big green suitcase with the four wheels at the bottom that Aunty Cora travelled with three years ago. And with the heavy coat, Rudi brought, wrap around her body, Peppy run the suitcase through the sliding exit door into the cold January night over to where Rudi parked his car.
II
Gwennie was lying-up in bed when the children come in, four soft fluffy pillows holding up the hot water bottle pressed to her back. With every car that pass, she hold her breath and listen, waiting to see if it was Rudi. Then just as she start to doze off again, the slamming of doors wake her up.
‘Come in,’ she say to them, motioning with her head as them file in. ‘I’m as sick as a dog, but I want to see how me children look.’ And them walk around to her bed, Jeff first, then Peppy.
‘Jeff, is you this? Oh my goodness! Where you growing to, boy? Dead stamp of your uncle, Samuel. Same pinch face smile. Same flare out nose. How the asthma?’
And as Jeff turn around to explain that him think the asthma is psychologically based, for ever since him relocated down to Mile Gully it wasn’t as persistent, Gwennie’s line of vision shift from off Jeff to focus on Peppy, whose size and height and looks was unfathomable.
‘Peppy, is you that? But look at me dying trial!’ And in her haste to raise up and look close at Peppy, the pain rip through Gwennie’s shoulder blade, causing her to shut her eyes tight all of a sudden and squeeze out the pain. ‘This can’t be,’ Gwennie think half to herself and half outloud. ‘This can’t be the same little girl that was up at Aunty Cora.’
For in truth, it was as if a total stranger was standing up in the room with her. The little resemblance to Luther that was there earlier, gone. Every last drop. And it make Gwennie think maybe all those times she thought she’d seen resemblance, it was her own head telling her nonsense. For in front her now was a brand-new person. Face pretty like money, but a hardness around the eyes and mouth corners bringing to mind people who suffer from hard life or preparing to meet it. No resemblance whatsoever to anybody in her family as far back as she can think.
‘Rudi say you have arthritis. How’re you feeling?’
Gwennie never know what to answer. Her mind was back down at Grandma’s listening for the ring in the voice, the joke that was always lurking around door corners, the mischief in his eyes as them used to twinkle up to her, but nothing a tall like Luther. Peppy’s tone was dead flat. No sign of life. Almost as if the question come natural, she ask it all the time out of sheer good breeding, but in actuality couldn’t care less if Gwennie was really okay or not.
‘Not too bad,’ Gwennie answer, everybody else in the room blind to her. She never see Jeff hovering around the other side of her bed, eyes and nose wide open with the newness of Foreign. She never see Delores in the doorway blocking it with her tall frame, or Rudi peering in from underneath Del’s arm. Only Gwennie and Peppy alone in the room. ‘The doctor say is stress, me worry too much. But them don’t know what them talking about. And them charge so damn much to look at it and not even know what it is.’ Gwennie kiss her teeth. ‘Is arthritis. Mama did have the same thing and her mother before that. It knife you more than usual when the weather turn cold. When it get warmer, it won’t be as bad.’
‘You have ointments for it?’ Peppy ask, glancing at the bureau. No signs of the plenty bottles of Arrowroot or Bitterbush or Bayrum and other bad smelling vials of rubbings. Nothing except for the small black-and-white-radio-television at one end; matching comb and brush set, underarm deodorant, dish of face powder, tube of lipstick bunched up together at the other end, and a family photo in the middle.
‘No, me dear,’ Gwennie answer her. ‘Him say I must take vacation. Take time off from work and travel for a while. Lay down sleep and wake late in the mornings. Exercise, jog or walk long distances. Too many things on my mind. But I can’t afford vacation now. Too expensive.’
And she and Peppy continue to talk, nothing personal that would make them uncomfortable first thing, but about Miss Gertie and Leslie, Aunty Cora and the sho
p, school and the quality of education these days and plenty other trivial things. A little later, Peppy cry excuse to Gwennie, say goodnight to Rudi and make her way into Delores’ luxurious queen size bed, that she’d bought to replace the twin bed not long after her first paycheck. There, she settle in for the night, twisting and turning over on her belly then her back and sides till finally she drop asleep, body bruise-up and tired from all the hassling.
III
Peppy’s first letter to Aunty Cora ran almost five pages back and front. She dispatch it off exactly one month after her arrival. She write Jasmine too, for them did grow closer and closer over the years, and Vin.
It was a Saturday morning when she write the letter. And except for the heater knock-knocking now and again, the house was dead quiet, everybody sleeping. Peppy take her time and crawl out the bed, blanket and pillow dragging behind, careful not to wake Delores, for Delores is a woman who don’t like anything to wake her up before one o’clock Saturday afternoons. Sprawl-off on the carpet, head cover-up, windows rattling from the howling wind outside, she start her letter Dear MaCora.
At first she ask after Aunty Cora’s arthritis and lump, if any improvement taking place. Then after Marlon, Leslie’s little boy him have with the Creole woman, and who Aunty Cora raising now, if him bad as yaws same way and giving plenty trouble? How Babbo and Miss Doris? How poor Miss Gertie and Leslie making out? Then Peppy tell her about the school she and Jeff attend, that’s not too far from the house; how the Black Americans in her class laugh at her accent and the other West Indians standoffish. Always acting as if them better, refusing to speak to her. Then Peppy tell her about teacher Biggs who’s been advising her about the plenty scholarships she must apply for next year so she can go on to university. And Peppy remember to tell Aunty Cora that yes, it look as if her plenty prayers working, in truth.
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