by Allen, Jewel
There was no excuse this time, no children in the room to interrupt them. It was just her and him, in a time-tested dance for the ages—that push-pull of love. That dance of the heart.
He reached up and passed a thumb over her bottom lip, and she swayed toward him, her gaze intent upon his mouth.
That kindness, that gentleness, and always that attraction. He needed her in his life. If only she could allow him to play a part in her life as well.
His head dipped down to kiss her, but she averted her face.
“No.”
Michael froze. “No?”
“Let’s not do anything to jeopardize our budding friendship.”
“I don’t see why a kiss would—”
She covered his lips with two fingers, but that only fanned the flames. His eyes closed as he kissed them with near reverence.
She was only a woman, not a goddess, and yet he was treating her as such, kissing not just her fingers now but her palm, the side of her hand, the inside of her arm, feeling intensely alive...
With a little moan, she swayed toward him and met him halfway. His lips branded hers with a scorching kiss.
She pulled away, and he could sense her body tensing up. He needed to reach and reassure her.
“We’ll continue to build our friendship,” he murmured. “A kiss doesn’t matter.”
His words had the opposite effect. She appeared more agitated, her eyes darting to the side as though trying to find an escape.
Reaching for her again, he pleaded with his eyes, but she’d successfully kept her distance.
"What is it?” he asked, his chest tightening with anxiety.
“How could you say it doesn’t matter? Do you mean my concerns don’t matter?”
“Of course not. You’re twisting my words. What else could I expect from a lawyer?”
As soon as the words left his mouth, he realized his mistake.
Lara’s expression chilled him to the bone. Turning swiftly at her heel, she fled to the bedroom and shut the door.
Chapter 34
Michael woke groggy. Tired. Not just in body but in spirit. Lara’s warmth last night that descended into what was becoming a repeated pattern of rejection was wearing him down.
He showered and got ready for the day, not bothering with trimming his beard. His attitude matched his looks. Out of sorts, off-balance, and jumbled up.
He checked his emails and answered a few, including one from Esther checking in on him and confirming details of the charity project. Esther responded right away, just as she responded to him—welcoming and warm. He was relieved she didn’t hold grudges.
Too bad he wasn’t attracted to Esther in that way.
Michael’s despairing thoughts turned to Lara. He pictured her in his arms, responding to his kiss. She could say or do all she wanted about not wanting a relationship, but her body language gave her away.
The door to the bedroom opened, and Michael tensed as he looked slowly over his shoulder. It was just Mick, disoriented and blinking at him like a baby owl. In his arms, he carried Harry the Hippo.
“What’s up, buddy?” Michael asked, glancing at the kitchen clock. It was only seven.
Mick shook his head, stopping a few feet away.
“Want to come and keep me company?” Michael patted the barstool by him.
Mick nodded and joined him. He tucked Harry on his lap and settled his head on his arm, watching Michael.
“Sometimes,” Mick said softly, “I think Mom and Dad are coming for me, but then I remember they’re not.”
Michael switched his computer to sleep mode and shut the laptop. “Me too, buddy.”
“I want them back.”
Michael’s heart cracked. “I know. We all want them back.”
“Why’d my dad pick you to take care of us?” Mick asked, his lashes wet from tears.
Michael had the same exact question.
“I don’t know. Maybe he thought I could take you to baseball games.”
“Will you?”
“I want to.”
“But you’re gone a lot.”
“That may have to change a little.”
Mick straightened in his seat, frowning. “Can I please have chocolate milk?”
Michael got up and took out two of the cartons that the staff had thoughtfully put in the fridge for the children. He searched for two glasses and poured one in each of them. Like a bartender, he pushed the drink over to Mick.
Mick looked more like Jane than Jim, with his blond hair, but Michael saw glimpses of Jim too. Michael’s heart contracted with pain, but he needed to stay strong for this little buddy of his.
He wondered what Jim would want him to teach Mick. Would he have pushed for Mick to work in a certain field? Take music lessons? Play sports?
“I played baseball as a kid,” Michael said.
Mick’s eyes widened. “What did you do?”
“I pitched. Sometimes third base.”
“I don’t like baseball.”
“What do you like?”
Mick shrugged.
“It’s still early,” Michael said. “You don’t have to decide now.”
Mick knocked back a drink and ended up with a chocolate mustache.
Michael’s heart softened once again for this little boy. Jim might be gone, but Mick could continue his legacy.
“Your dad liked to play basketball,” Michael said. “He did in school.” Tears pricked his eyes, remembering Jim beaming after his buzzer shot.
“Maybe I’ll try basketball.”
There was a sound behind them. Michael turned to see Lara watching them from the doorway of the bedroom, her heart in her eyes.
“I noticed he wasn’t in bed,” she said softly, “so I came to check. Everything okay?”
Michael thought for a minute. Between him and Lara? No.
But this wasn’t about them. This was about the kids.
“Yes,” Michael said. “We’re just having a man-to-man talk.”
Lara’s expression softened as an uncertain smile played on her lips.
Michael wished he knew that the smile was meant for him too. But it was for Mick. Everything was for the kids.
An hour later, when everyone was up and ready for breakfast, their group made their way to the hotel restaurant. Mick and Lizzie ran ahead in a game of tag.
“Everything okay with Mick?” Lara asked.
“He misses his parents.”
“Poor thing. Lizzie woke once last night, whimpering for her mom.”
“Thanks for being there for the kids,” he said.
“Of course.”
Michael hesitated. “Thanks for being there for me.”
Silence descended between them, and Michael wondered if she’d heard.
“You’re welcome.” Her tone was formal. A tone reserved for one’s employer.
Michael’s jaw tightened. He wished things could go back to how it had been for them. Before he spooked her.
“You okay?” she asked.
His head came up swiftly. “Are you kidding me?” he asked, anger surfacing.
She flinched. “Sorry, I meant about your brother.”
“My...oh. I thought you meant last night.”
Lara averted her eyes. She obviously didn’t feel sorry about that.
The hurt was too much. Michael moved away, walking at a fast clip into the lobby area where the children were talking to Kalinga. Lara approached them, her eyes filled with guilt.
As she should.
His phone beeped. The call was international.
“Hi,” Dr. Bolling said. “I am the director of our hospital in Zambia. Ms. Mastroni contacted me, and I spoke to the elders of the nearby village. We’re set for you to come and do your clinics today. There will be other helpers on-site, doctors and nurses from the local hospital.”
“Great. Thanks so much, Dr. Bolling.”
“No problem. I think it’s great that you’re doing this. Call us if you have any trou
bles finding our place.”
“I will.”
Michael found the trio by the fruit. Lara was trying to convince the kids to go easy on the strawberries. Despite their tiff, he couldn’t help but laugh. After a moment’s hesitation, she laughed too. Her smile mellowed, and he felt his chest tighten. Trying to act nonchalant, he made his way to their table and sat across from her.
“I just got a call from Zambia,” Michael said. “Esther arranged for me to do some cataract surgeries at a local village in Zambia.”
Lara gave him a wary glance. “That’s great.”
A server took his order, and when it came, they ate in silence. Michael couldn’t read her expression. Why did she seem disturbed by his news?
And then it dawned on him. He’d mentioned Esther. Could that be why?
He flicked a glance at Lara, who refused to look at him. “You can come down with the children,” he said. “Or you can stay in the hotel.”
“I’d like to go,” she said quietly.
“Me too!” Mick chimed in. “What are we doing?”
“We’re going to a village, and your uncle will help people see better.”
Mick frowned. “Are you sticking things in their eyeballs?”
“Yes, I’ll put in a new lens.”
“What’s a lens?”
“Like a window. Some of the people can’t see out because it’s dirty. So I’m going to give them a new clean one.”
After they finished and were going back to the rooms, Lara turned to Michael.
“Hey, sorry I was so negative with Esther. I think it’s cool that she’s helping you.”
“No worries. She can come on a bit strong.”
“That date with her...”
He glanced at her warily. “Yes?”
“You said it didn’t mean anything.”
“It didn’t.” He put in as much conviction in his voice as he could muster.
“I believe you.”
He expelled his breath slowly. “Thanks. That means a lot to me. Why the change?”
“I want to believe. I want to trust. I’m not there yet, but the desire is there.”
“Does that mean you’re ready to take the next step with me?”
“The next step?”
“Trusting. Accepting. Loving.”
She smiled. “Soon, I hope.”
Chapter 35
Michael watched Zambia’s landscape as Kalinga drove the Rover down the highway.
It was a throwback to a time past, where people worked the field and still lived in huts. The dirt was red here and mostly bare. Acacias dotted the landscape, that quintessential tree of the African savanna. Every so often, there was a hut with little corrals for animals. The huts were made of natural materials with a thatched roof.
Along the highway, little children came out of their huts and ran, calling something out. Michael rolled down his window, letting in the cool rushing air.
“Watta-bottah,” the children said.
“What do they want?” Michael asked Kalinga
“They want your plastic water bottles. They make toys out of them.”
Michael took a guzzle of his remaining water and tossed the empty bottle out. Behind him, Lara and the children opened their windows and tossed theirs out too.
More kids came out. An older boy ran strong and fast while a sibling tried to keep up. The younger child tripped and fell, crying. Michael felt sorry for the kid.
Kalinga slowed as they approached a clump of open-sided white tents in the middle of nowhere and parked. A woman greeted them as they got out of the Rover.
“Welcome to Nakatida,” she said. “We are so honored you would come to help us today, Doctor. And this must be your beautiful family.”
Michael simply smiled. His gaze met Lara’s, and he realized she was on the same page too.
Keep it simple.
Besides, they were, in essence, family.
They met the team helping him for the day. Some were doctors who looked forward to the training. People had walked for kilometers to be there for treatment that day. They sat on long benches to wait their turn.
With the help of the volunteers, Michael performed over a hundred eye exams. Most had cataracts. In this African savanna, they prepped the patients and then performed the surgery. Soon, there was a line of people with white bandages and patches over their eye.
On one bench, Lara and the children visited with some of the patients. As Michael made his way to another treatment table, he stopped and stood transfixed, just watching them.
His little “family.”
Lara looked up, catching him staring.
He didn’t try to hide it. Here was a fascinating, beautiful woman, and they were sharing this amazing African experience together.
Lara offered him a glowing smile.
Hope surged in his chest. Later, they could talk some more about their future.
For the rest of the afternoon, Lara’s smile sustained him. Between patients, he sought Lara’s encouraging glance.
He finished the last surgery at six that night. Michael was physically exhausted, but his spirit was energized. He’d never felt such a rush from working on eyes as he did that day.
He walked over to Lara and the children and stood next to them. He was afraid if he sat down, he would never get up.
“Good job, Doc,” Lara said. “You look worn out.”
“And happy,” he pointed out.
“Yes.” She studied his eyes. “That, too. We’ve been invited to dinner here. By the chief elder.”
“Dinner sounds nice.”
“He lives nearby.”
Michael thanked all the volunteers, left the medical tents, and walked over to a hut that didn’t look any larger or more special than the others. There were two goats in the corral, plus a few chickens pecking at the red dirt.
Michael’s tennis shoes were stained red, but he didn’t care.
“Come in, come in,” a woman said as they entered the hut. It was cool inside, without a lot of natural light. Cozy and comfortable like a cocoon.
An old man sat on some blankets on a makeshift sofa. He had white hair cropped close to his dark head. His eyes still exuded alertness despite his age. He didn’t speak English, so the woman translated.
“I am his sister, Ette. He is the elder of this family. And we have many other family around.”
A delicious smell filled the hut as a young woman who looked to be in her mid-teens entered with crocks of food.
“This is nshima, cornmeal,” Ette said, pointing to food that looked like mashed potatoes. “We have it in every meal. This is goat stew. And this,” she held up a bowl, “is ifinkubala.” She grinned. “Caterpillars.”
“Caterpillars?” Mick echoed, his eyes growing wide.
The cornmeal and stew were a delicious combination. Michael was the first to brave a bite of the caterpillar.
“Like chicken,” he teased. It had a bit of a nutty flavor, and the crunch was good if one didn’t think too hard about what was being eaten.
Mick tried one and nodded approvingly. He put some more on his plate. Lizzie poked at one and shook her head. Lara tried it, her polite but perturbed expression making Michael laugh.
After the meal, Michael rubbed his stomach. “It was a fine meal for an even finer company.”
He tried to pay Ette as they rose to leave, but she refused his money.
She patted him on the back. “You have given our village a gift, and this is our humble way to repay.”
Michael put the money back in his wallet. “Thank you.”
Ette glanced at Lara and the children. “May you and your family be blessed for your kindness.”
Michael walked out of that hut, steeped with light and goodness. Under the moonlight, a group of children met them, gazing at Mick and Lizzie. They held water bottles filled with pebbles. They shook them and made noise, holding them out. Mick glanced over at Michael, who nodded his permission. Soon, the American visitors
were playing a rudimentary game of Kick the Can with the water bottles.
Mick and Lizzie ran over to Michael and Lara, pulling on their hands to get them to play.
“Been a while since I’ve played this,” Michael admitted to Lara, “but I’m sure I’ll catch on again.”
Lara stuck her tongue out at him, making his heart do a little flip. “Game on.”
“Boy, you’re good,” Michael admitted to her after his team was defeated three times in a row.
She giggled. “I’m sure I was kickball champion when I was a little kid.”
After a few more rounds of kickball, they piled into the Rover. Kalinga asked how the day went, and the children reported happily, like little baby birds tweeting.
Michael’s eyes met the mama bird’s in the side mirror. Lara was grinning from ear to ear.
He yearned to truly make her part of his family someday.
The question was, would she do him the honor?
Chapter 36
The next day, they slept in and had a late breakfast. Kalinga promised to show them one of the seven wonders of the world.
Lara shivered with anticipation. Not just at the prospect of seeing the Falls, but at seeing Michael. Their relationship had shifted once again. He hadn’t tried to kiss her or rush her, and she was grateful.
The slower things went, the easier she may warm to the idea of a future with him and the children.
Like the family she’d never had.
“Here we are,” Kalinga said, pulling into the parking lot outside the visitor’s center. “The smoke that thunders. Mosi-oa-Tunya.”
He parked the Rover and stayed with the vehicle while Lara and the group made their way to the entrance. She couldn’t see the falls from the lot, but she could feel the mist in the air.
Vendors approached them, offering similar things: wood serving utensils, bags, woven shirts, and beads. They were aggressive, following their group across the lot. Michael waved them off, carrying Lizzie in his arms.
They’d had breakfast, just barely, but running into a café just inside the entrance to the park reminded the kids they were thirsty, so their group stopped for drinks. Lizzie also wanted an ice cream cone.