by Debby Lee
Sunday, April 2, 1911
The week had passed in pure bliss. The lessons each day were wonderful. It wasn’t that she felt all that confident in correcting her speech, it was simply spending the time with Philip that made all the difference in the world. And then today they’d gone to church again and then on another drive. This time, he’d given her a tour of Brooklyn and they got out at the bridge and looked out over the water. They talked about God and prayer, and he shared with her about the new program he and some of the other ball players were starting to help feed the orphans in the city.
It had all been wonderful. Refreshing.
Her fire for God hadn’t waned all week, and she found herself waking early to read her Bible before she left for the professor’s office.
She prayed for Philip every day.
And realized she’d already given him her heart.
“Penny for your thoughts?” Philip’s voice interrupted her musings.
“I was just thinking about you.” She felt her face heat instantly. That was an awfully bold and brash thing to say.
He touched her cheek with his hand. “I think about you all the time, Jeni.” He pulled back with a sigh. “We better head back.”
When they reached her street, he slowed to find a place to park. “We might have to walk the rest of the block.”
“That’s all right. I’m used to it.” She waited as he came around to open her door. When he offered his arm, her heart sped up again.
“Opening day is coming up. I’ve got a really full schedule this week, so would you pray for me?”
“Of course. I’d be honored.”
“Would you like to come to a game one day?”
“I’d love to.” The adoration in his eyes made her heart pump even faster.
Instead of walking, he stood there, and his blue gaze penetrated hers. It had been a perfect day. Her heart pounded at his nearness.
He pulled her hand up to his lips and kissed it. Then he leaned in very slowly and kissed her on the cheek. “Thank you for another perfect day, Jeni.”
Her heart flooded with emotion. “I was just thinking the same thing.”
He walked her the rest of the way to the door of her building and waved goodbye as she entered. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“See you tomorrow.”
If she were capable of floating on air, she probably would. How had she gotten so lucky?
She shook her head as she climbed the stairs. It wasn’t luck. God had seen fit to bless her, and she would be forever grateful.
She’d never been this happy in her life. And she couldn’t wait for tomorrow.
When Philip made it to his apartment, he was still on cloud nine. He needed to tell Jeni soon that he loved her. He couldn’t keep it in any longer. And every day that he saw her, he felt like his heart might explode.
In the back of his mind, there was a little niggle of doubt.
Aunt Bridget.
She hadn’t spoken to him again, but she’d made her presence known when he’d picked up Jeni this morning. And judging by the sour look on her face, she didn’t approve.
But maybe she just thought it was too soon. That they hadn’t known each other long enough.
Philip thought about it for a moment. He couldn’t wait to tell Jeni how he felt. But what if they had a long engagement? They could both deal with that, couldn’t they? Besides, baseball season would keep him really busy.
A smile split his face. Yeah, he could do that. Maybe he could talk to her one day after their lessons. He could offer to walk her to work like he did most days.
Loosening the tie at his neck, he went into the kitchen for a glass of water. Tomorrow.
He would tell her tomorrow.
Walking back into the main room, he noticed an envelope by the front door. He must have missed it when he came in.
Probably from one of the guys. Reaching down to pick it up, he realized he hadn’t introduced anyone to Jeni other than Tony. And it had been all over the papers. Maybe it was time to introduce her to the team.
He ripped open the envelope and pulled out a single sheet of paper.
As he read the words on the page, his collar became tight and anger boiled up inside of him.
Why are you interested in that tramp? She’s only out for your money. The Irish are no-good, lazy, filthy vermin.
If you don’t stop seeing her, I’ll go to the press with a sordid story that will ruin Miss O’Brien’s reputation.
He crumpled the paper and threw it in the wastebasket. How could anyone write such horrible things about Jeni?
Stomping to his bedroom, he ripped the tie from his neck and unbuttoned his shirt.
As his anger stirred hotter and hotter, Philip knew in his heart that it couldn’t be true. Someone just hated the Irish and didn’t want him and Jeni together. That had to be it. Which only made his anger grow.
But then he felt convicted by his own hate-filled thoughts. Crushed by the emotion surging through him, he got down on his knees and prayed. Lord, I don’t know who wrote that letter. But I need Your help. I’m asking for Your blessing on my relationship with Jeni. But Lord, if this isn’t Your will, if I need to end it to protect her reputation, please help me to be willing. I know You can take care of her better than me, anyways. I need Your guidance and direction. You know that I love her, Father, but I don’t know what to do.
Feeling a gentle peace wash over him, Philip stood up and walked over to the open window. A slight breeze fluttered the curtains. Tomorrow, he’d see Jeni and he’d decide what to do.
Chapter 13
Monday, April 3, 1911
Sleep had eluded Philip most of the night. But he dressed and went to Professor Montgomery’s office. More than anything, he just wanted to see Jeni’s face and know that she was okay. As the night had worn on, he’d had horrible thoughts of someone coming after her. All because of him. He couldn’t let that happen.
As he drove through the streets of New York City, he tried to think of anyone who might have a grudge against him. Could it be another baseball player? It wasn’t that he truly had any rivals. At least he didn’t think he did. But many of the guys were competitive. And ever since he’d won the home run record, the public had crowned him the king of all baseball. Could someone be jealous?
But why would they go after Jeni? It didn’t make sense.
When he made it to the office, she was already there. Sitting in her chair with a smile just for him. He tried to act as if everything was all right.
He didn’t remember making it through the lesson. It was brutal. And he sensed that Jeni knew something was wrong.
Professor Montgomery must have as well. “Philip, it seems like you are not fully invested today. Maybe we should stop early.”
“That sounds like a good idea.” Jeni smiled at him.
Philip nodded, and they gathered their things.
As they walked out of the office, Jeni grabbed his hand. “What’s wrong?”
He held on to her hand and walked with her down the stairs. Once they were outside, he stopped and released her. “There’s something I need to tell you, Jeni.”
Her face fell. “All right. I’m listening.”
“I care about you a great deal.”
Eyebrows lifted, she didn’t say a word.
“In fact … I … I’m in love with you. I was so happy last night and couldn’t wait to see you again so I could tell you.”
Relief flooded her features, but then her brow furrowed. “But … I don’t understand. You look miserable, and frankly, you’re scaring me, Philip.”
“I’m sorry. I don’t want to hurt you in any way.”
“Then just tell me. What’s wrong?”
Should he tell her the truth? If he did, would that put her in more danger? He looked around. Someone could be watching them. The thought made the hair on the back of his neck stand up. He took a deep breath. Honesty was the only way to go, best to just get it out there. “I received
a threatening letter yesterday, and I’m worried about your safety.”
She pulled back with a gasp. “Threatening? Threatening how?”
“Someone doesn’t like us being seen together.”
“What? Why would they …?” She looked down. “Does this happen to you often? What did the letter say?”
“I can’t repeat it. It was too ugly. But someone targeted you.”
“Oh. But why me?”
He longed to pull her into his arms. The look of hurt and confusion on her face made him ache. “I don’t know. Other than the fact that you’ve been seen publicly with me.”
Several moments passed as they stared at each other.
Philip didn’t know what to do.
Jeni took a deep breath and stepped closer. Her eyes brightened. “Philip, I can’t undo what some person said in a letter, but did I hear you tell me that you love me?”
He nodded.
“I love you too. Isn’t that enough?”
Oh how he wished it were. What if the writer of the letter just wanted to scare him off? What if it was a joke? It was a horrible one, but maybe it was.
“I’m not sure what to do, Jeni. But I definitely don’t want you in any danger.”
“I understand that. But what exactly are we dealing with? Someone who just doesn’t like me?”
“That’s what I don’t know. They said that if I didn’t stop seeing you, they would take some sordid story of you to the press and it would ruin your reputation.”
“But I don’t have any sordid stories….”
“I think that’s the point. They will make up whatever they have to. All to ruin you. Or me. I don’t know which.”
She chewed on her lip, and even though she straightened her shoulders and looked brave, he could tell she was worried. “What are we going to do?”
“I’m not sure. But I won’t let anything happen to you. I promise.” He reached for her hand and squeezed it. Looking around him, he didn’t want to risk any public displays. “I need to meet with my manager. But I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Oh, okay.” She appeared defeated. Hurt that he would leave in the middle of this crisis. But the fact of the matter was he needed to not be seen with Jeni.
Fear niggled at Jeni at every turn. Who would do such a hateful thing? And why would they target her? Just because she’d been to church with Philip?
She’d thought that there were plenty of people who might be upset that one of America’s favorite baseball players was seeing a woman of a lower class, but to go so far as to threaten her? Who would do such a thing? And why? Jeni didn’t have any enemies. She made hats for goodness’ sake! Tossing things around on her worktable, she wanted to vent her frustration but had no opportunity and no time. Several clients would be coming in for their special orders. And her heart wasn’t in it. In fact, her heart hurt. How was she supposed to be creative in the midst of all this?
The thrill of Philip’s confession of love stayed with her, but now that she’d had a chance to think about it, she was more nervous than she wanted to admit.
It had taken her a lot of time to build a reputation with Mr. Crawford. Now he trusted her and depended on her for the wealthiest of clients. In fact, she created all the designs for his shop. The other girls made some of the simpler hats, but Jeni was still the one who designed them all. And anything complicated was her job to make. How many handmade flowers had she sewn onto hats over the past couple of years? Probably thousands. Could this person that threatened Philip actually be capable of ruining her reputation? She wouldn’t be able to stay in New York City or possibly ever be able to work in a reputable shop again.
Were her dreams of owning her own shop to be destroyed too?
The thought made her sick.
She’d told Philip she loved him. And she did. But was she ready for this? Yes, they were really good friends, but were they ready to throw away not only her reputation but his?
Doubts fought at the edges of sound reasoning. How long she had waited for love, and now that it was within her grasp, it seemed unattainable. All because someone wanted to ruin her.
Which brought her back to the same question. Why?
Something Reverend Richards said yesterday came back to her mind. That God was within reach every moment of every day. So when scripture said to pray without ceasing, it meant that anyone could talk to the Father anytime. Anywhere. The lines were always open. Rather than standing here and worrying about it all, she should be praying.
Without hesitating, she got down on her knees in her workroom and poured out her heart to God. Heavenly Father, I want to know You more. I feel like I’ve gotten a taste of a relationship with You recently, and I know that I want more. And God, I need Your help. I praise You for who You are and that You are the Most High. I come to You now, broken and afraid. Thank You for bringing Philip to my life. He has been the best friend I’ve ever had. And Lord, I feel like this love I feel for him is a beautiful gift from You. But Father … what if I have to give him up? Please, God, I don’t want to … She choked on the words but lifted her chin and raised her face to the ceiling. I am seeking Your will, Lord. Not my own. Help me to remember that. Please guide me. Please take away this fear. Help me to follow You.
With a new peace and a calmer spirit, Jeni rose to her feet. While the threat seemed very real, so was her love for Philip. It was a gift from God. Maybe they just needed to take a step back and spend some time praying about what God wanted them to do. It was clear by Philip’s reaction that he hadn’t slept much. He was worried. The same thing had happened to her. Something else Reverend Richards had talked about—that worry was a sin. That was another reason they needed to continually pray. Maybe she and Philip should go about this differently. Spend some time each day praying together.
But what if another threatening letter arrived? What would they do?
Shaking her head free of the doubts and fear, she decided to leave that in the Lord’s hands. She’d prayed for His will. Now she was determined to trust.
Something she’d never been all that great at.
But she could change.
Chapter 14
Wednesday, April 5, 1911
On his way to the linguistics lesson, Philip knew it probably wouldn’t be a pretty scene waiting for him. Yesterday, he’d canceled his lesson. He hadn’t said anything to Jeni, had only left a message at Montgomery’s office.
Regret filled his thoughts. So many demands had been placed on him with the team, he hadn’t slept well for a few days, and now, he hadn’t handled this situation with Jeni well at all. But he was tired. Aggravated. Worried. And just a bit overwhelmed by it all.
Stressed. That’s what his manager said. He was probably right.
Taking the stairs two at a time, Philip made it to the top and found Jeni standing there with her hands on her hips. “Uh … hi.” His words sounded strained to his own ears.
“Hi, yourself.” A whimsical smile filled her face. What was going on? Wasn’t she mad at him? She tugged at his arm and walked him to the professor’s door. “I realize that you have a lot going on with the beginning of the season next week, but I have a request.”
“Oh?” His eyebrows lifted.
“Yes. You see, the other day I was really struggling with this whole threatening letter situation, and I started to worry. A bit too much. It affected my work and my creative process, and I was a mess. Then I remembered what the reverend said about prayer and about worry. So this is my request …” She drew a long breath. “Why don’t we meet every morning fifteen minutes before our lessons and pray together? That way we’re not seen together out in public, and we bring our burdens to the Lord. What do you think?”
His heart already felt lighter. She wasn’t mad at him. “I would be honored to pray with you, Jeni. I really would.”
“But you’re still concerned. I can see it on your face, so why don’t I just save you from having to say what’s really on your mind. You want to stop seei
ng me in public to protect me. I understand. So … I don’t have to go to church with you for a few weeks—even though I like it very much—just to see if it all goes away.”
“And if it doesn’t?”
“Well then, we’ll just take it one day at a time.” She let go of his arm and clasped her hands in front of her.
All he could manage was a nod.
“I have to be honest with you, Philip. I’ve given it over to God. And as much as I care for you, I’ve asked for His will to be done in the matter.” A sheen of tears appeared in her eyes. “Even if that means that I have to give you up.”
Even though he understood what she was saying, it couldn’t have hurt worse if she’d stabbed him with a knife. God, what do we do? It felt like You orchestrated this whole thing, and now I’m worried and afraid. But I don’t want to let go of Jeni. Please …
Friday, April 14, 1911
Bridget placed her fists on her hips and examined the letter. Had it been long enough since the first one was sent? Jeni hadn’t gone to church with the baseball player again, neither had she mentioned Mr. March for a while. But she left earlier and earlier each day. And she continued the lessons. Bridget had confirmed it herself by following her niece yesterday. At first, she’d hoped that her niece wasn’t seeing the man anymore, since no one had seen the couple together. But yesterday, she saw the two on the stairs. They looked quite close.
Which was completely ruining Bridget’s plans.
Jeni had seemed supportive when she talked of traveling to Wisconsin. But was it enough?
Now that Bridget knew that the March fellow was still in the picture, she knew she had to take the next step.
She looked back down at the piece of paper. It was pretty harsh, even to her own ears. But it had to do the trick. It had to.
Then it would all be over and they could leave.
A grin split her lips. It was a good plan. And no one was the wiser.