by Sabrina Kade
“It doesn’t have to be temporary,” is all I can muster. “You’re here to stay, Arizona. Now and forever. You may not have Chosen me, but I’ve Chosen you. You have my hearts and my soul.”
“And the body?” She’s trying to tease, but I’m not quite in the mood.
“You will see. Each passing you will see that this is not temporary. Your happiness does not have to be temporary. Nor your safety or comfort. I am here, and I will care for you.”
“I don’t need anyone to care for me,” she mutters. “I can take care of myself. Allowing anyone else to do that would only prove that I’m weak—”
“Stop saying that word. Love does not make you weak. Neither does happiness.” I pull her away from my chest, locking my golden eyes with her dark brown ones. I know this is hard for her, but I really want to believe that slowly, but surely, I’m breaking down her walls. She’s probably tired of hearing my promises, but I’ll keep saying them. I’ll say them over and over until they find their way into her heart.
Because Arizona will remain on Hethdiss. Even if Prince Korben returns home with his human mate, and I am not welcome, I still stay here with her. I will never let another male touch her. Frighten her. Scare her. And if I do ever find out that her female companions laughed at her or called her weak, I am not sure what I will do. I will not hurt a female, but perhaps, I would severely injure their Chosen mates.
Suddenly, the air in my lair is stifling, and I want to get away. “Come on,” I say, lifting Arizona in my arms. She’s startled but wraps her arms tightly around my neck for a moment before pulling away.
“Where are we going?”
“Out. We’ve been in my lair for far too long. I need sun. Fresh air.”
“I think it’s raining. Don’t you hate the rain?”
I resist hissing. I do hate the rain. Anything cold. Wet. But I still need to get away from this lair. We both do. I shrug, and stride toward my lair opening, pushing the curtain aside with my food so I can march right through.
The fields beyond the second lair are dismal. The sky smells like rain and wet wildlife, and it’s not the least bit pleasant. But thanks to the scent, none of my brothers roam around. Most are probably sparing in the secondary Gathering Room while their females roll their eyes. I set Arizona down on her feet, jutting my chin out into the fields. “Humans don’t have a problem with this kind of weather, yes?”
She nods. “I’ve always liked the rain. Not as much as York, but it’s all right.”
“Should we go out then?” I go to reach for her, but she jumps back.
“Don’t you hate the rain?”
“I like being with you. Besides, it’s already slowing up.” I hold my hand out from under the shelter of the lair, and only a few drops strike my palm. I smile at Arizona, and though she still looks skeptical, I think she’s also relieved to get out of the lair for a little while. And I’m happy to endure some discomfort for her. The rain stings the scales on my shoulders, but I manage to bite my annoyance. Arizona looks at peace. Occasionally she stops and stares up into the sky, allowing the droplets to strike and fall down her brown cheeks.
“You’re beautiful.” The words come to me without permission, and she jerks back toward me.
“You want your dick sucked or something?” For the first time in several rotations, her smile reaches her eyes. “Because compliments are a fabulous way to get me going.”
I chuckle. “I do not require your mouth on my cock at this moment. Come, let's head toward the talas.”
She doesn’t look as though she quite believes me, but that’s fine because she slips her tiny hand into mine and squeezes it. The motion sends a pang of arousal straight to the tip of my cock, and thankfully, Arizona doesn’t notice. Or if she does, she’s polite enough not to point it out. I don’t know what this female does to me. She’s beautiful, but it’s the little things that set me off. And though the rain hurts and I sense someone roaming around the borders, I’m so happy to focus on it. Arizona is carefree. I sense no fear or discomfort in her scent.
By the time we’re at the borders and staring into the fields ahead, Arizona has such a tranquil calm about her. I’m glad we’re alone out here. Most of my brothers probably haven’t noticed that the rain has let up, so I have her all to myself. I use this time to distract her, speaking of the northern and southern territories. The outsiders. She steals a look up at me.
“And Chocal?” she asks. “He’s an outsider, right?”
I nod. “Yes. Though I am not entirely too sure of his reasons for returning. He’s large. He doesn’t need to rely on the support of others.”
She snickers, catching me off guard. “Everyone gets lonely, Drozass. Maybe he wanted friends?”
I snort. “Chocal does not work that way.”
Her expression shifts. “How does he work?”
“Your guess is as accurate as mine.” Instead, I pull her to me, enjoying the feel of her body. Her soft breasts pressing into my chest. “I’d rather hold you close. I’d rather stand still together.”
She looks puzzled. “You brought me out here so you could stand still with me?”
“Is that all right?” I dare to smile, hoping I haven’t somehow offended her. I don’t know a lot about human mating rituals and perhaps she doesn’t enjoy standing in chilly, damp air. I would love it if that were the case, but Arizona doesn’t seem like she wants to go anywhere. “Will you stand still with me?”
She shakes her head. “That’s a quote from Sex and the City.”
“What?”
Another snicker. Another shake of her head as she burrows under my arm. “I guess standing still is nice once in a while.”
A comfortable silence falls between us as I keep Arizona close to my side. I hear others leaving the lairs, probably noticing the change in weather, and I have no problem shifting Arizona and myself, so we’re hidden from the others behind a tala. I know how much she wants to see the others, but I’m not ready to give up this privacy yet. Not when I’m convinced everything will be ruined with a single wrong word from one of her female companions. “I’ve enjoyed this.” I lean down to kiss the top of her head. “Being with you is wonderful. You know this, yes? No female has ever filled me with such happiness.”
She snorts. “You make it sound like I’m some demure princess and not a space whore.”
“I won’t have you speak of yourself that way.”
“Why not? It’s what I am.”
“Not anymore.”
She rolls her eyes and frustration boils through me. This is why I’m so afraid. I’ll never be able to break down her walls. That my words will never reach her. There’s one way to catch Arizona’s attention, but I’m not even sure if she’s in the mood for what she needs most. She doesn’t need to hear sweet words. She needs fucked. Hard. She needs to feel my obsession with having her. Feel my overwhelming desire to claim her. I tilt her chin up and claim her full, pink lips with a kiss, lifting her off the ground with ease.
“What are you doing?” she asks breathlessly between kisses.
“Tired of talking,” I hiss, kissing her once more. “For now.”
Her eyes grow hooded. “Oh? Does this mean you’re in the mood for me sucking you off after all?”
“Not exactly.”
I press her back up against the trunk of the nearest tala, shimmying down my shorts so my cock can spring free. Arizona moans, and her entire demeanor changes within moments. Unease and hesitation are taken over by desire and lust. I love it. I love her. And though this is only a temporary solution, I’m happy to take it for now. Whether she wants to believe it or not, she is here to stay. She will be here with me. She will be my mate. Arizona will continue to fight me, but so long as her female companions do not make her question her choices, I will find my way through her defenses.
A shiver runs up my spine despite my resolve.
Someone watches us.
And though I’m doing everything in my power to convince myself t
hat I'm paranoid, I cannot shake the feeling.
Someone is observing Arizona and me.
But who? And why?
I try not to think about it. But it takes all the focus I have to come at the same time as Ari. Despite everything, nothing will stop me from making sure her pleasure means just as much to me as my own.
Chapter Nine
Arizona
Someone’s spying on us. Drozass feels it, though he won’t say anything. But I’m not an idiot. I’ve worked and stayed alive this long to know when someone is watching me. And someone has been watching either Drozass or me lately. Or maybe our mystery stalker is watching both of us. I keep waiting for Drozass to bring it up because there’s no way he hasn’t noticed, but his lips remain shut. I made some comments in hopes of forcing him to admit something’s off, but he refuses to bite. And though I’m dying to talk to Alaska or Dakota about it, I’m afraid what will happen if I do.
The past several days, the only person I feel comfortable speaking with other than Drozass is Dakota, and I’m certainly not going to tell her that I think I have a fucking stalker. It scares me that while I have a few vague ideas of who it could be, nothing truly makes sense. It could be Iriel, but he’s never been particularly interested in me. It could be Kansas’ or Dakota’s mates, making sure that nothing weird is happening. Or it could be one of those outsiders that Drozass mentioned. From what I understand, they don’t have the same connections as Prince Korben, so they don’t exactly have females of their own to help pass the time. So, despite all my reservations, sitting out in the fields with Dakota, when I’m convinced everyone is out of earshot, I pull my knees closer to my chest. “Dakota, have you ever had a client who kept an eye on you? Even when you weren’t working for him?”
She turns “Jesus, Arizona. I don’t think of Cade as just a client.”
“No, no,” I say, waving my hands around. “I’m not talking about Cade. I’m not even talking about anything here on this assignment. I mean, in general. In the past. Have you ever had an alien follow you around even though you weren’t technically working for him?”
Finally, she seems to think this over seriously. Out of the corner of my eye, I notice Alaska lift her chin, and to my horror, rises and strolls over. I flash my attention back to Dakota. “Change of subject,” I hiss. “Forget I asked anything.”
Alaska takes a seat beside us, frowning as always despite her soft, delicate features. After flipping her damn near perfect wavy blonde hair over her shoulder, her sharp blue eyes focus on both of us. “Didn’t know you were into girl chat, Arizona.” She smiles, revealing a perfect set of white teeth.
I don’t return the smile, and Dakota shifts uneasily as though she’d prefer to get up and leave right now. I’m sure she’s afraid. I meet Alaska’s judgmental look right on. “If I wasn’t into girl talk, what would be the point of surrounding myself with a bunch of bitches?”
Her smile drops slightly. Thank hell. I’m not really in the mood for her, but I don’t exactly want her to realize that either.
“What are you two talking about?”
“Nothing,” Dakota chirps, ruining my entire plan to be nonchalant.
Alaska’s catlike grin returns. “Nothing, huh? Didn’t look like nothing.” She pretends to glance around the fields before circling her attention back to me. “The weather’s decent today. You could practically set up a picnic here. We could all do with a little more eating out in our life, couldn’t we?” She snickers behind her hand, fixing her gaze on me. “What do you think, Ari? Don’t you think we could all use a more eating out in our life?”
Dakota grins, proud with herself for getting the joke, but I’m fuming.
“Where is Drozass by the way?” Alaska purrs. “I haven’t seen him.”
“Where’s Taylis?” I shoot back, enjoying the rare look of surprise on her face. “He’s your pleasure mate, isn’t he? Unless… did something happen with you two? Don’t tell me he kicked you out.”
“Shut up,” Alaska hisses. “We’re fine.”
“So are Drozass and me.” I finally grin right back at Alaska, knowing I’ve plucked a nerve. I guess she cares more about Taylis than even she wants to admit openly. Now that Alaska is finally calm, I trace my fingers through the longer teal blades of grass. “He’s a good male,” I say in a low voice. “But like so many of the others he has too many expectations.”
Alaska’s eyebrows shoot up sky high. “Expectations. You mean, he wants a future with you.” She doesn’t even bother asking a question. She doesn’t need to. Her expression shifts. “I know how that goes,” she says in a low voice, but before I can ask what she means, she speaks over me. “But you’re totally against that, aren’t you?”
“Would you like me to be?” She swallows. “Because, when we first arrived, you didn’t believe this assignment was anything special. But then when Blythe started spending time with Korben, and we were all released from the Gathering Room, you were on team Blythe. And now you’re…” I trail off, waiting patiently to see if she’ll fill in the blank. For just a moment, her lips part, ready to provide an answer, but then her expression hardens.
“I’m with you, Arizona,” she says crisply. “Whatever you want to do. Whatever you want to believe. I’m with you.” She shares a look with Dakota. “We’re all with you.”
“What about Kansas?” I ask. “Kansas has not only been talking to the alien I’m fucking. She wants to stay. She believes these aliens are planning to keep us.” I wave my hand in Dakota’s direction. “I already know her opinion,” I lie, hoping to bait Alaska and Dakota dutifully keeps her mouth shut. “But I’m interested, Alaska. You’re spending a lot of time with Taylis. Are you considering their words more seriously? Do you think we can stay here? Rather, do you want to stay here if the option were available?”
“Whatever you want to do, Arizona.”
Heat prickles the top of my head, and my temples throb with frustration. “You have an opinion on the subject, but you’re fucking afraid to say it.”
“I’m afraid?” She smirks. “That’s a laugh.”
“You think I’m afraid of something?” I ask, frowning. I know what she’s going to say, but I at least want her to have the fucking vag to say it to my damn face. “If you’re so against talking about yourself, fine. Talk about me. What am I so afraid of?”
Dakota shifts. “Guys. We don’t have to talk about this.”
“I think we do. We all do. Kansas keeps asking me for all these damn group meetings, but I wasn’t about it because I thought she was alone in her opinion. But apparently, I’m the one left outside the group.”
“That’s not true,” Alaska says in a low voice.
“Do you want to stay?”
“I’ll support whatever you want to do, Arizona. You know that.”
“Do you want to stay?” I spin toward Dakota. Color flashes across her cheeks. “Do you want to stay?”
“I’m the same as Alaska, Arizona. I’ll support whatever you want to do.”
“It’s what we’ve always done,” Alaska reminds me. “Even when we don’t agree with you, we support you. Don’t ever forget that. No matter what you do, we’ve always supported you.”
My eyes narrow. I know what she’s referring to. And the fact that she knows how much it bothers me and yet she still brings it up leaves me incredibly frustrated. “So that’s what it is, huh? Do you blindly follow me? Even if you don’t agree with what I do, you’ll do it anyway?”
“Washington would be alive otherwise.”
I gasp. “Shut the hell up, Alaska. You don’t know that.”
“Whatever. I don’t want to dig into the past. For whatever reason, you seem to make the right decision in the end, so I’ll support whatever you decide.”
That shuts me up. Just like that? No regard for Taylis? No future? No happiness? No true punishment about what happened to Washington?
Just going along with me because I’m her supposed alpha. Well, that’s great.
>
I may usually hold on to control with all my strength, but now that I have it completely, I’m not sure if I want it anymore. Maybe Drozass is right. Maybe there’s something to be said about not being in charge all the time.
I rise to my feet, ready to tell them all to vag up and make their own decisions when I notice light footsteps behind me. I turn, and I see the last person I want to see. “Kansas,” I grumble. “Hey.”
“Having a meeting without me?”
“No.”
“Yes,” Alaska says over me at the same time. “She wants us to decide what we’re going to do here. She won’t make the decision herself for once, and she wants us to choose her for her.”
Fucking bitch. “Seriously, Alaska. What’s your problem lately? You’re such a bitch since—”
“Since you lost your nerve,” she finishes, standing as well. “That’s when I started treating you differently. You only noticed now because you care about something else other than yourself.” She points an accusing finger at me. “I love you, but you’re differently lately. Ever since we lost Washington, you’ve fucking turned into a limp dick.”
“I didn’t say that!” Dakota squeaks. “I want to stay here—”
“Shut up, Dakota,” Alaska says, rolling her eyes.
“I didn’t say that either,” Kansas says, shocking me. “All I’m saying is, I don’t want to boss anyone around, but I get that someone needs to be in charge.” She steps toward me. “But I want to stay here. I want you to admit that you want to stay too, Arizona. And it’s okay to want to stay.”
“You don’t have to punish yourself,” Dakota says. “We know you’re happy with Drozass.”
“We know you’re afraid to Choose him as a mate,” Kansas adds. “I’m sure it has something to do with what happened to Washington on Sidetha, but it also has something to do with us.”
“Us?” I snap, hating that this conversation has somehow turned into an intervention.
“All of us,” Kansas says, circling her finger around. “You hate that we could be divided. You’re clinging to us with all you’ve got, but eventually, whether we want it or not, we’re going to be split up. We’ve lasted longer than any of us expected—”