His fierce statement eased some of the worry inside her.
She smiled at him.
“Told myself if you said you wanted him that I’d walk away. But that’s bullshit. I won’t walk away. I want you. I promise, I’ll do what I have to do to make myself worthy of you.”
What was he talking about?
“I’m not worthy of you.”
Brick scowled, looking ferocious. Her warrior. Her protector.
“What bullshit is that?”
Her blunt man.
“Not normal.”
He stared down at her. “Normal?”
She nodded.
“Who the fuck said anything about you having to be normal?”
“The world?”
“Fuck the world. Is the world here with us? Are you going to let other people dictate the way you live your life?”
Obviously, he’d never had the world turn on him.
However, the world didn’t turn on her. Just some very nasty people. And it was her fault. She’d given them that power. She’d let them get in her head, hurt her.
“Do you think I’m normal? I’ve got so much fucking baggage I could fill a plane. Screw normal.”
He said that, but he didn’t know the extent of her issues.
“I’ve never . . .” She closed her eyes, thinking of Xavier.
“You’ve never what, Duchess?” he asked gently.
“Been with a man.”
Tensing, she waited for his reaction. The ridicule. Or the smug acceptance.
“Open your eyes.”
She shook her head.
“New rule. No hiding from me.”
She scowled. That sucked. Also, she didn’t think he could just keep adding rules.
“Open. Your. Eyes.” A firmer tone this time had her eyes opening. Staring into his gaze, she saw acceptance, gentleness, and a hint of hunger. There was also an air of satisfaction.
“You think I care that you haven’t had sex?”
She pressed her nails into her thighs.
“No.” He moved her hands from her thighs. “Another rule. No using your fingernails as weapons against yourself. Actually, no hurting yourself at all. Understand me?” He cupped her chin firmly.
She nodded.
“So, you and Xavier have never been a thing?” he asked carefully.
She shook her head.
“Just the way he was talking about you, it sounded like maybe he cared about you as more than a friend.”
“Xavier was Reuben’s best friend. They had a falling out two years ago, just before Xavier moved back here.” She sucked in a breath. Why was it so hard for her to talk about anything emotional or real? When she was in Little space, she could chat away, but when she was adulting . . . yeah, it was hard as fuck.
She cleared her throat. It was hard to speak so much when she wasn’t used to it.
“I’ll get you a drink.” Standing, he set her down on the chair.
“Coffee,” she demanded.
“Water,” he replied with a firm look. He tapped her wrinkled nose then moved into the playroom. After he returned, he picked her back up, resettling her on his lap. Then he unscrewed the water and held it to her mouth. She settled in against him, feeling exhausted. After a few sips, she knew she couldn’t put this off any longer.
“Xavier has always watched out for me.” She paused, thinking about this next part. “Always seen me as a little sister. Nothing else.”
“Maybe he used to,” Brick said.
She shook her head, feeling embarrassed. “No, that’s all I am to him. When I was eighteen, I tried to kiss him. He let me down gently.” She bit her lip. “He’s one of my best friends.”
“You feel like you’re betraying him by being with me?”
Sort of. She shouldn’t feel that way. Distress flooded her. She didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. Maybe she couldn’t do this.
“I just don’t want him to be upset with me.”
“Duchess, look at me,” he said firmly. “I’m sorry for the way I behaved down there. I’ve got things to work on. You want to call him, ask him to come back, then you do that. He’s your friend.”
“You’re really okay with that?”
“I am. As long as you’re honest with me. Remember, being lied to is a trigger for me.”
“I get it. I’m a lot of trouble,” she whispered to him.
He wrapped his hand in her hair and tugged her face back. The pain should have scared her, the aggressiveness. But it was tempered. She knew he wasn’t using his full strength, not even close. And something about the movement just did it for her. Arousal spiked through her blood and she was nearly squirming in need. His glare was almost enough to send her crashing into an orgasm. And wouldn’t that be embarrassing?
“You kidding me?” he growled. “Too much trouble? I don’t want to hear bullshit like that from your mouth, understand me?”
She attempted to nod, but he had her pinned down tight. She licked her lips.
“Words.”
“Yes,” she replied. Her voice was so quiet she wondered if he could hear her, but satisfaction filled his face.
“You’re not trouble. Got me?”
“What about . . .” She pointed at her bed.
He quirked an eyebrow. “You think I shouldn’t want you because of your bed?”
He knew that wasn’t exactly what she meant. She gave him a look.
“You know I’m a Dom.”
She nodded.
“Before Linda, I used to go to a BDSM club a lot. You know my favorite room in that club?”
“The torture room?”
“No.” He shot her a quelling look. “Not the torture room. Although, do you have a basement in this monstrosity?”
She shook her head, wide-eyed. Nope. That wasn’t happening.
“Hm. Maybe I can convert a bedroom. I have a feeling you’re going to earn a lot of punishments.”
She would not!
“You’ve got more than one punishment owing for the way you keep disobeying me.”
What?
“It was the Littles room,” he said, not explaining about these punishments further. “You’re a Little, aren’t you, Juliet?”
Was he . . . did he . . .?
“Juliet?”
She nodded slowly.
“Now that you’ve trusted me enough to speak to me, I’d really love if you could keep using words. But is it painful to talk? Has your voice always been like that?”
She winced. Trust Brick to come out and ask. In fact, she was surprised it had taken him so long.
“Not saying it’s bad or anything, Duchess,” he quickly reassured her. “Just want to know if it hurts you.”
Did it hurt her? Not exactly.
“My voice suffered trauma when I was a kid,” she told him. “Then I stopped speaking for a long time. It’s never been the same.”
“That’s why you don’t talk in front of most people?” he asked thoughtfully. “But you’ll talk or whisper to people you trust?”
There were two different issues there. She winced. “When I was in school, I went through some stuff. It left me with a lot of issues around trust.”
He froze. “Fuck, baby.”
She shrugged. “Easier not to talk. I know I sound weird. So I only speak to people I know won’t . . .”
“Hurt you?” he growled.
Yeah. Exactly. She nodded.
“Fucking hell.”
“When I’m in Little space, it’s easier,” she admitted.
“Thank you for telling me,” he said, surprising her. “No secrets between us. I’m yours. You are mine. No more hiding.”
He wanted to know everything? Her breathing started growing rapidly.
“Easy,” he told her. “I don’t need everything all at once. You feel safer in Little space?”
She nodded. She also felt safe around him.
“Sometimes, I think life would be easier if I spent all my time in Little space.”
/> “That’s why you went to your job even though you hated it,” he guessed. “You were worried you’d never leave?”
“Yeah.”
“So, you’ve never had a Daddy?”
“I told you I haven’t been in a relationship,” she whispered.
“You don’t need to have a relationship to have a Daddy or Mommy or Caregiver. Not a sexual relationship. They can be someone who looks out for you, gives you rules and consequences, gives you the care you need without anything else.”
Oh. She hadn’t quite realized that.
“I’ve never had a Daddy.”
“Would you like one? Only, one that comes with a relationship too, obviously.”
She sucked in a breath. It was her wish come true. A stern but loving Daddy. But what could she give him in return?
“What would I give you?”
He raised his eyebrows at that. “Your submission. Your care. Your attention. You give me you.”
Her breathing quickened. “There’re things about me, my past . . . it’s not pretty.”
“Like I said, I’ve got enough baggage to fill a passenger plane. Your past doesn’t scare me. Does mine scare you?”
She shook her head. How could it? When it had led him to her. Sure, there would be bumps. He had issues, just like she did. But if he was here and hers . . . that was all that mattered. All she’d dreamed of.
Although that wasn’t entirely true. But that other dream was a fantasy that never had a chance of coming true.
“Juliet, would you like me to be your Daddy as well as your man?”
“Yes.” Her excitement was tinged with a hint of sadness, but she squashed the negative emotion.
“Good.”
He cupped her face with his hands. He was going to kiss her!
Fuck!
“Wait!” she managed to get out.
He froze. “What is it?”
“Well, it’s just, this is my second kiss—”
“Your second kiss? Then your first kiss was . . .”
“With you. But I—”
Brick looked shocked. “I wish you’d told me. I would have tried to make it more memorable.”
“Hey, I thought it was plenty memorable.”
“Your second kiss will be a proper one then. I have to redeem myself.”
Proper one? What did he mean?
He leaned in.
“Wait!”
He froze. “What is it?”
“Can I brush my teeth first? I puke breath!”
19
He ran her another bath while she brushed her teeth.
“I ruined it, didn’t I?”
Her voice was raspy, husky. It didn’t sound like it should come from such a slight body.
It was sexy as fuck.
Seriously, that voice was going to kill him. How was he meant to keep his fucking hard-on under control when she sounded like that? He was just grateful that she’d chosen him. Wanted him.
But there was still this niggle inside him, telling him something wasn’t right. That he was missing something.
“Ruined what?” he asked.
“The kiss. I shouldn’t have said anything. But then I would have had puke breath. And you might not want to kiss me again because you might think I always have bad breath.”
“For a girl that barely talks, you sure can word vomit,” he teased.
She blushed, dropping her gaze. “Sorry.”
“Enough,” he said firmly. “You didn’t ruin anything. I should have remembered that you likely feel like crap, and you’ve been through a lot today. This can wait.”
“But I don’t want to wait.”
He studied her. He wanted this kiss to be memorable. And fuck, he hadn’t even brushed his teeth.
“Got a spare toothbrush?”
She nodded and fished through her drawers for a toothbrush still in its wrapper. It was pink, but he didn’t give a crap. He turned off the bath taps. This time, the bubble bath was purple. It kind of hurt your eyes to look at it, but she had so much of this stuff, he figured she must like it.
Taking the toothbrush, he put some toothpaste on it. Then he handed it to her.
Her eyes widened then a look of chagrin filled her face. She covered her mouth. “OhmygodIstillhavestinkybreath!”
Shit. He gently pulled her hand away from her mouth. “No, Duchess. I wasn’t giving it to you to brush your teeth.”
“Then . . . I don’t understand.”
“Want to brush my teeth?”
Her mouth opened then shut then opened again. That was damn cute. Then she giggled.
“I get to brush your teeth?” Her strangely broken voice took on a different note and he knew her Little was close to the surface.
“Yeah. You want to brush Daddy’s teeth?”
Her breath caught and she studied him for a long moment.
Take it slow, idiot.
Had he pushed her too fast? Damn it.
Then she grinned. “Have you not been doing a good job of brushing your teeth?” She wiggled a finger at him. “The dentist won’t be happy. No candy for you.”
“No candy? That’s harsh.”
She sighed. “Sorry, it’s not me that makes the rules.”
“No, Daddy makes the rules, baby girl. Now, brush my teeth.”
“Okay, open wide.”
“Open wide, what?” he asked, deciding to press her a bit since she still hadn’t said the word he most wanted to hear. He lifted her so she was sitting on the cabinet as she was a bit short to reach his mouth easily.
“Um, open wide, please.” She banged her feet against the cabinets and he winced at the noise, stilling her legs with one hand.
“Nice manners, but that’s not what I want either.”
“Oh.” Her cheeks went red. “You’re sure?”
“More sure than I’ve been of anything before.”
“Open wide, Daddy,” she said so quietly that he had to strain to hear her. That was all right. This was a start.
He opened his mouth. This was kind of odd. But it had definitely made her relax.
“Gosh, Daddy. These are really dirty,” she told him as she started to brush his teeth with way more enthusiasm than he ever did. At one stage, he thought the toothbrush was about to go down his throat.
“Definitely no more candy. You don’t want holes, do you, Daddy?” she said sternly. Then she pulled the brush out. “Spit. Rinse. Okay. Repeat.”
By the time she was finished, he was pretty sure she’d scraped half the enamel off his teeth.
“All shiny, Daddy.”
“Thank you, Duchess,” he said dryly. He moved between her legs then put his hands onto the counter on either side of her, trapping her in. He studied her, waiting to see if she showed any sign of panic. But pleasure filled her face. Yeah, his girl definitely liked when he got all dominant on her.
“Time for that kiss.”
He didn’t give her too much time to think. Grabbing the back of her head with his hand, he held her still while he pressed his lips to hers. He kissed her softly, drinking her in. Goddamn. Need flowed through him, making him groan as his hard cock pressed against his pants.
Don’t scare her off.
Drawing back, he ran a finger over her lips. As he’d hoped, they parted, and he dipped his finger in. She sucked on it with a quiet murmur.
“Keep your mouth open,” he commanded as he slid his finger free, then he pressed his mouth against hers again, his tongue slipping into her mouth. For a moment, she was still, almost frozen. Then he ran his hand up the outside of her thigh, his other hand holding her head, and she sighed into his mouth.
Then her tongue started playing with his.
Oh, fuck yes.
He could have stood there all day, kissing her. Could have happily dropped to his knees, pushed down her pajama pants, and eaten her out until she screamed.
But slow. She wasn’t ready for more.
Drawing back, he had to hold her to keep her fro
m chasing his mouth.
“Duchess, stop now.”
“Want more.”
Damn, that was like an aphrodisiac, he could feel it in his dick. Shit. He was going to have to do something about his hard-on from hell. He needed a shower and a change of clothes anyway. But he didn’t really want to leave her alone.
Bath. Clean. Food. Then he’d take a shower and take care of his dick.
“I know. But I can’t guarantee I’ll stop. And a kiss is all you get at the moment. Until I’m sure you’re ready for more.”
* * *
She was ready for more now, damn him. What was he talking about?
A frown filled her face as she glared at him.
“Don’t give me that face, baby girl,” he warned.
She crossed her arms over her chest with a huff. She wanted more kisses. Maybe she could sneakily kiss him.
Secret mission: Kiss Brick.
Brick eyed her warily. “Time for a bath.”
“No bath.”
“Yes, you need a bath.”
“No bath.” If she threw herself at him, he’d have to catch her, right? Then if her lips just happened to land on his . . . well, he’d have to kiss her.
It was a flawless plan, really.
“You’re a brat. Since you’re obviously feeling well enough to sass me, we’ll be having a chat about you obeying me. Especially when it comes to safety.”
“No chat.”
“Well, you’re right. It won’t be much of a chat. More like a lecture, followed by someone getting a red ass.”
“Your ass.”
“No, not my ass. What’s got into you-oomph . . . Argh!”
Oh shit. She froze.
Her secret mission to kiss him had somehow gone horribly, horribly wrong.
Blood hadn’t been part of the mission! Somehow, instead of him catching her, and ‘accidentally’ kissing him, she’d managed to slam her forehead into his nose.
Which was now bleeding everywhere.
Oh no. Oh no.
Why couldn’t she do anything right? Even though he was bleeding a lot, he’d still managed to grab hold of her with one arm so she didn’t slip onto the ground.
“Fuck. Crap.”
She stood frozen as he grabbed one of her mermaid towels and pressed it to his nose. Then as he turned, she did the only thing she could.
She ran.
Her Daddies’ Saving Grace Page 19