by Gina Welborn
Jakob closed his eyes as the reality of Madame’s circle sunk in.
If the brothel owners who killed Finn ever discovered Madame Lestraude masterminded the rescue operation, they’d torture her—making sure she suffered the maximum a human body could endure—until she revealed the names of her co-conspirators.
Him.
Mrs. Hollenbeck.
Letty’s parents.
“Letty,” Jakob whispered. He’d thought knowing the truth about Madame’s rescue operation would help him stay safe.
It didn’t. It made him more vulnerable.
Putting his life on the line to rescue girls out of prostitution was one thing. Putting his family’s lives? His friends? His involvement—his work for Madame Lestraude—put more lives at risk than he’d ever considered.
He refused to let anything happen to anyone he cared about. He had to find a way to keep Letty safe. He had to protect her.
Because he loved her.
Because he’d found the girl he wanted to spend his life with. And he did it without the help of a matrimonial company. All he had to do now was convince Letty to marry him.
* * * *
Jakob breathed in the crisp evening air as he escorted Letty away from the academy, the glow from the gas lights illuminating the blocks between the school and their hotel. No one was about except for them and the lamplighter. It was such a serene night after an emotional goodbye. Leaving Ada and Hazel had been painful yet not devastating. They had a good school to grow up in. They had a mentor and a headmistress who knew their pasts and didn’t shun them for it. They had opportunity to have a wonderful future.
They had hope. And Jakob would never have met them if Letty hadn’t spent ten days in jail.
“It all worked out as I knew it would,” Letty said, as they passed the lamplighter hooking his ladder to the bar underneath the lamp.
“Why are you smiling?”
“My dear Mr. Jacobs, the brim of my hat prohibits you from seeing my face. You can’t know I’m smiling.”
He leaned forward and looked down. Yep. Smiling. “I won’t gloat and say I told you so.”
“How refreshingly kind of you.” She rested her head against his shoulder. “I’ve dreaded this day ever since St. Paul. I didn’t think I could leave the girls in a town where they knew only each other.”
“They’ll be fine.”
“I know that now.”
He knew that, too. “Why did you agree to chaperone the girls?”
“My father offered to finance the art studio and museum I wish to build. I thought my dream coming true was the prize, the gift for me doing this.” Her voice softened with emotion. “But I think Father knew the journey here was his real gift to me. I know that sounds strange to look at joy and sorrow both as a gift.”
“I don’t think it’s strange.”
“I believe that the people with the emptiest lives are those who give of themselves the least, but the more we love, the more our capacity to love grows.” She sighed. “The journey with you and the girls has stretched my heart. It’s a good hurt.”
For the rest of Jakob’s life, he would be grateful for her father’s decision to entrust her with this trip. His pulse increased. This was his moment.
In his most casual voice, he asked, “Would your parents be open to letting us chaperone the girls again next year?”
“This cause is precious to my parents. I doubt they would want to give it up permanently.”
Jakob stopped at the intersection, halting her from crossing the street. At the sound of hooves clopping, he looked down the side street. A doctor’s buggy raced toward them. It slowed before turning left and dashing past the hotel.
“But”—his heart was pounding so hard he could barely breathe—“what if we were married?”
Jakob waited. And waited. And yet she still didn’t answer.
Because she didn’t love him? No. The looks, the smiles, the ease she had when holding his arm as they walked—they had to mean something. He hadn’t imagined her feelings for him.
Seizing the moment, he slid his arm out of her hold, then grasped her hands. “My name is Jakob Gunderson. Jakob is spelled with a k, by the way. I live in Helena, and I love you.”
“You don’t love me.” She let out a desperate little laugh. “You can’t.”
He smiled gently. “Why can’t I?”
“We just met.”
Eight days ago. Not that he’d remind her. “A lot has happened since then.”
“Oh.” She looked away. “Well, people don’t fall in love that quickly.”
“I’ve been praying for wisdom and knowledge to know if you were the right one for me.” He cradled her cheek in his palm, drawing her gaze to his. “I struggled with my feelings because even I didn’t believe a person could fall in love that quickly.” Some part of him still didn’t, yet he knew what he felt, and it was unlike anything he’d felt before. “It started as attraction, but then I realized everything I’ve been looking for in a wife—it’s you.”
She moistened her lips.
Heaven help him, he should be sainted for not kissing her. He grinned at the stunned way she stared at him. At how her eyes widened as though she couldn’t believe her luck, and then narrowed as though searching her own heart to determine her feelings for him. When she smiled, his world shifted. His legs felt like buckling under the weight of his emotions—and hers—but he stayed firm. This was a moment to be savored. Remembered. And not for falling in a heap on the sidewalk.
She loved him. He could see it.
Suddenly tears pooled in her eyes.
Jakob stepped closer. “Sweetheart, why are you crying?”
“I don’t want this moment to end.”
“It won’t.”
“How do you know?”
“When I look at you,” he said as emotion built within him, “I see my future. I want to marry you, but first I need to court you properly so you and your parents know my feelings are sincere.”
A tear slid down her cheek. “You’re really asking me to marry you?”
“I am.” Jakob abruptly got down on one knee. “Now I am. Letty Pool, will you…?” He chuckled. “This would be more romantic if I knew your real name.”
“It’s Colette, but my friends call me Letty.”
“Seriously?” Jakob shook his head. She merely shortened her name? “You were supposed to use a false identity.”
She grinned and scrunched her nose in that adorable manner that tempted him to kiss her. “Will you be relieved to hear Pool isn’t exactly my last name?”
“Some.” He thought she’d say more about how she loved him, and when she didn’t, he asked, “Is this a yes?”
“No, Jakob. It is a resounding yes!”
He stood, lifting her in his arms, swinging her around, and laughing along with her. He never wanted to let her go. But they were on a public street. For anyone to see. Jakob looked down the block; sure enough, the lamplighter was looking their way. The man tipped his hat, then walked on to the next gas lamp.
Letty’s grip slackened, drawing Jakob’s attention. Her gaze shifted from his lips to his eyes, and she gave him a hesitant smile. “There is a minor detail I need your help with.”
“Anything for you.” Jacob set her on her feet. “What is it?”
“After I was released from jail, my parents lectured me about how I needed to start making sensible choices, how I started and didn’t finish too many things, and how I didn’t understand what commitment was. I wanted to prove them wrong, so I agreed to marry Robert.”
Her words tumbled out too fast for him to focus on anything but the last two: Marry Robert. She was engaged. Jakob drew in a breath. He’d proposed—he’d fallen in love with—another man’s girl.
Jakob didn’t want to hear more, but she continued
. “I started regretting it immediately, of course. Who wouldn’t? It was only logical. Reasonable. But I couldn’t back out because that would prove I’m fickle. While I don’t love Robert, I thought we could make it work.” She rested her palms on Jakob’s chest. “But then I met you.”
Jakob felt his heart drop at those five little words: But then I met you. Zoe had considered him a viable suitor until she met his brother. Nothing he’d done stopped her from falling in love with Isaak. Nothing Jakob had done stopped Emilia from falling in love with Mac. And Yancey? She’d loved Hale since she was twelve. The only person who could stop Yancey from loving Hale was Yancey.
Jakob narrowed his gaze on Letty. “Why did you accept the guy’s proposal if you didn’t love him?”
“Robert’s a good man,” Colette said in a quiet voice. “But you’re the best man for me. I see that now.”
Jacob exhaled. Even though he knew her answer, he wanted to hear it. Maybe some unheroic part of him wanted her to hear herself say it, too. “What do you want help with?”
“Come with me to Salina and meet my parents. Once they see how much we love each other, they’ll understand why Robert and I shouldn’t marry.”
“You want me to end your engagement.” It wasn’t a question; it was the truth.
She was looking at him strangely, as if she couldn’t fathom why his tone had grown cool. “No. I’ll end it. I want you to be by my side. Having your support will make it easier for everyone.”
Jakob let out a little laugh, the edges of it blurred with pain. “Not for everyone, Letty. It’ll only make it easier for you.”
She drew back. “How can you say that?”
“Because it’s true!” Jakob flexed his fingers to ease the tension built up from clenching them. He drew in a breath, then let it out in a lengthy exhale. “If you want to end your engagement, then you do it.” Jakob met Letty’s gaze dead-on. “I’m not helping you fix a mistake you willingly made. I won’t be your pawn. I won’t do to your fiancé what my brother did to me.”
Her chin rose. “You don’t have to. Just come to Salina with me. Please. Meet my parents. Let them see how much I love you.”
“That won’t stop people from looking at me as a man who stole another man’s girl.”
“I’m not Robert’s girl!”
Jakob gritted his teeth. “You should have told me you were engaged.”
“We weren’t supposed to talk about our real lives.”
“You dropped tidbits of your life around as freely as the money you spent in St. Paul. You knew I was falling in love with you. The responsible thing was to say something before I asked you to—” He couldn’t bring himself to suffer through the humiliation of speaking the words “marry me” again. “Rule number two: Don’t form attachments.”
“You’re right,” she whispered.
They stood there in silence.
He had nothing more to say. Except to chastise himself for being a fool for falling in love with her. That was a reproach best saved for when he was alone.
“Well, then,” she whispered. In a louder, uppity voice, she said, “Goodbye, Mr. Gunderson. I wish you well.” Head up, she strolled like a queen across the street and down the block to the hotel.
Jakob stood under the streetlight. Once she was inside, he started toward the hotel. He had a horse to buy and a three-day train ride home.
Life would be better once he was home.
* * * *
Grand Central Hotel, Santa Fe Avenue
Salina, Kansas
Colette stared at the door to her parents’ suite. She was late. She could’ve arrived yesterday, but she’d had no inclination to get out of bed and pack. Odds were she wouldn’t have seen Jakob at the train depot yesterday afternoon since his train departed for Wichita in the morning. Why risk it? Why risk him seeing how pathetic she’d become? The hat she wore was more to cover her poorly pinned hair than for proper etiquette. No one had any idea she’d worn this dress three days in a row, and even if they did, she didn’t care.
She raised her chin. “Stop crying,” she ordered herself. “Be strong, and act like nothing bad happened.”
She’d learned her lesson, not that the lesson was the one her father offered her this trip in hopes she’d learn. Instead of hauling Beatrix up to the top of the Schellenberg building in vain hope that a bunch of constellations would atone for the devastation of a broken engagement, Colette should have hunkered down in Beatrix’s bedroom and cried with her. But she hadn’t. She’d offered Beatrix a fun adventure instead of empathy.
Groveling to Mother and Father wouldn’t make things better. Besides, they likely hadn’t given a thought to why Colette hadn’t arrived yet. They knew promptness wasn’t one of her virtues. They weren’t sitting in their room fretting about her.
She wiped her nose, pinched her cheeks to give them color, then dried her face with her gloved hands. She deserved every bit of heartache that’d come her way, but at least she would look presentable when she told her parents the trip had been a success. It’d be a couple of days before she could speak to Robert. Once their engagement was ended, she would face her parents’ next—and justifiably deserved—lecture.
Lifting her hand, she knocked on the door.
It opened. Father stood there. His face brightened with joy. “Letty! How was your—”
“Wonder—” Her voice broke before she could finish saying, “—ful.” Colette pinched her lips to restrain her emotions, but the tears fell anyway. “I’m so sorry, Father. I just want you and Mother to be proud of me, but I ruin everything, because I’m selfish and don’t think about how my actions hurt others. And you were right about me not taking life as seriously as I should. I should’ve never trespassed—”
Mother pushed Father out of the way and drew Colette into a tight embrace. “Oh, my poor baby. What happened?”
Chapter Twelve
I wish, as well as everybody else, to be perfectly happy; but, like everybody else, it must be in my own way.
—JANE AUSTEN, Sense and Sensibility
Helena, Montana
Hollenbeck estate
Saturday, September 22, 1888
Jakob strolled along the paved path to the gazebo where Yancey was sitting on the whitewashed bench half covered in dried leaves. Fingering a leaf, she stared absently at the ground. Since he could remember, she had loved weddings as much as he did, yet today’s festivities hadn’t done anything to improve her spirits. Or his.
He had cause: A broken heart.
She had no burden to bear other than an unflattering brown-and-pink bridesmaid’s dress.
“Are you over here pouting?” Jakob put one foot on the floor of the gazebo and grinned. “Because if you are, I’d like to join you.”
Yancey quirked a smile, likely in memory of the exact words she’d said to him two Independence Days ago, back when he thought he wanted to marry Emilia. Much had happened since then.
Emilia married the right man for her.
Jakob sent for a mail-order bride.
His mail-order bride then married his brother.
So Jakob left to buy a horse. Except on the way to buy a horse, he fell in love with the right girl who ended up being the wrong girl. Not exactly a story he ought to share with Yancey, who was the closest he had to a sister, because telling her about Colette would invite questions to which he couldn’t give answers. For Yancey’s protection. For his. For far too many people he cared about.
She fiddled with the brown leaf then crushed it between her fingers. The corners of her mouth pinched tight. Several seconds went by before she said, “I haven’t had a chance to talk with you since you came home. How was your trip?”
Myriad words came to mind. He settled on the vaguest: “Good.”
Her eyes narrowed a fraction. Not enough to cause a wrinkle in her brow, but enoug
h for him to know she knew he wasn’t telling the whole truth. “Have you been by to see Carline?”
Jakob blinked. Carline? That was an abrupt change of topic. The Yancey he knew would never allow him to skirt past a question. She was supposed to press him until he confessed and bared his soul. Why wasn’t she pressing him?
He studied Yancey for a long moment. Something about her was different. Sad? No, that wasn’t it. The descriptor coming to mind—strangely—was burdened, but what would Yancey, who never had a care in the world except those related to Hale Adams, feel burdened over? When Jakob left Helena three weeks ago, Yancey was over the moon with joy in managing Hale and his mayoral election campaign. The two seemed to have finally become friends…or at least friendly acquaintances.
“I took Carline to dinner a couple nights ago,” he finally answered. “She shared that Windsor is courting her. Isn’t that a little soon considering her parents only died two and a half months ago?”
Yancey brushed bits of leaf from her skirt. “Better that she is here with friends and a man who loves her, than for her to be in Butte with an uncle who wants to control her life.”
Jakob nodded, then stepped into the gazebo. Before his backside felt the cool of the bench, her gaze shifted to the wedding guests milling about Mrs. Hollenbeck’s expansive and well-manicured lawn. One guest earned her intense focus.
Jakob didn’t have to look to know who it was. “What is going on between you and Hale?”
She looked down, sighed loudly, and then offered another of those smiles that Jakob knew was forced because he’d worn the same smile moments earlier. “I gave a friend some excellent advice a couple of weeks ago, and”—she grimaced—“now I have about five minutes to decide how to follow it myself.”